I No Longer Feel Safe at Work, but I Can’t Leave

What this episode is about

The content explores the author's unsettling experience of dealing with a gas leak at their workplace and the subsequent lack of support from management, leading to feelings of insecurity and fear. Despite considering leaving the job due to the negative environment, they are hesitant because of ongoing job applications and financial responsibilities, highlighting the challenges of workplace safety and job security.

Key takeaways

• When chaos strikes, your instincts matter—lessons learned during a gas leak can fuel career clarity.
• In a world of opinionated bosses, humility is the gas that fuels a smoother ride on turbulent waters.
• Evacuation or reprimand: Your safety instincts may not always align with office politics. Navigate wisely!
• Waiting for job applications to process? Opportunity loves a proactive contender, not a passive bystander.
• Feeling unsafe can cloud judgment; clarify protocols before action to ensure your instincts lead, not mislead.

Who speaks in this episode?

• Dr. John Delony (Host) · 12 min speaking
• Unknown Caller (Guest) · 5 min speaking

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

Companies & orgs

• Grokipedia — Company · 1 mention

Full transcript with timestamps

0:06 Basically about a month ago there was um like we had a gas leak incident and I didn't know what to do. So

0:13 at your house or at the office? Oh that was at the at the job cuz it's like a lab so we had to leave the building.

0:20 I have a 15-year-old son and there's multiple gas leaks in my home on a regular basis. So okay. So at at the at the office. Okay.

0:27 Um yeah. So, it was at the office and um I didn't know what to do exactly cuz I've never and there was no supervisor. So, we ended up evacuating the building and I thought, you know, I was kind of freaking out for sure cuz it was like a scary thing. Um and uh my boss called me and he like yelled at me and then following that it um like the week after it was just like I kept getting like reprimmended and like I was surprised cuz I would thought that people would be like you know oh man I'm so glad you're still alive you know but

1:09 no one ever said anything like that. So but I'm also like stuck on crossroads in terms of jobs. So

1:15 tell me about that. I wanted to um So I've been like applying to things but it's like waiting for like months to like go through application processes.

1:27 So otherwise I would be like, "Oh, sweet." You know, I'm just going to leave this. So

1:31 Sure. Well, and and let me say this. You're wise to not just jump off the dock without another boat, right?

1:39 Yeah, for sure. Yeah. Are you married? You have kids? Um, no, but I have roommates and rent to pay. So,

1:47 excellent. Excellent. Perfect. That's awesome. So, um, I will say it like this. I have my boss is a radio icon and the CEO of a company has a thousand employees. I'm a very opinionated guy and so is he. And we have gotten, shocker alert, we've gotten cross. I also know that after we've gotten cross, I can always always circle back and say, "Hey, I want to follow up here." And then we can sit down and have that conversation with and I always enter that conversation with, "Hey, how can I do this right or better next time?" Or, "I clearly did something." I always take a humble approach. Not because I always think I'm wrong, but because humility is always the path forward where you get where you want to be right unless you want to burn something down. And I just have decided in my life I'm going to save burning things down to very rare moments.

2:51 And so, do you have the opportunity if you were to send your boss an email or a text message that y'all could loop back and say, "Hey, I want to follow up." Be like, "Hey, I clearly screwed something up. I thought I was doing the right thing. A, how do you want me to handle this in the future? And B, um, how can I make this right moving forward?

3:11 Uh, I mean, not really, just cuz like um, he is like very like strongly opinionated. No,

3:20 I am too. But I always but but but if he's strongly if if he's strongly opinionated cuz he's a jerk

3:27 or he he's he's so scared of being wrong that that's how he goes through the world, then yeah, you're right. That's not a person you want to work for. This whole thing will implode on itself at some point financially, safety-wise, whatever. this will implode because that sort of power is based on not being scared or trying to squash down fear, right?

3:50 Yeah. And I I Well, I think for sure if I had the opportunity or like if he was the kind of person I could sit down and like talk things out like same thing with my supervisor, like I would absolutely do that, but

4:04 it doesn't feel like I I could, you know. Have you done that with your supervisor? Um, no. She just like kept like lecturing me and telling me, you know, what I could have done different.

4:17 Okay. So, let's be reflective. Was she right? Oh, for sure. Yeah. And I told her that, too. I was like, "Yeah, you're right." You know, like I could have done that for sure. But it seems like no one respected it on my half that like I didn't feel safe, you know, and I have the right to like stop there, you know,

4:35 unless your l your feeling safe was not your feeling wasn't factually right and so you felt scared and then you got some new information and they're like, "No, actually this is the path you should have taken." And they should have said, "Hey, we didn't we didn't we didn't tell you this. That's on that's on us moving forward. Fill in the blank. Or maybe they did and you got scared and you didn't follow the protocol. But I want you to hold the tension of I felt unsafe but actually I was and I pulled the fire alarm and actually there wasn't a fire.

5:12 Is there any truth to that? Yeah, I think in a way that like I could have like if I reflected on it, I could have reacted differently. But I think the problem is that when I look back on it is it's based on a lot of like assumptions of you know how that gas leak was occurring.

5:30 Mhm. So it would be me assuming like okay you know if I stop this that you know it's going to be done leaking and I can remove it you know.

5:39 Sure. But do you get how both of y'all had assumptions? Yeah for sure. And I I totally understand that and I told that to them too that um but it's just hard cuz you know I feel like I' it's definitely been a job that I've been like trying to get out of you know but the everything's slow you know.

5:57 Totally. So is there a world where you take your lumps and you just move on? Yeah, for sure. I I definitely tried to do that. It was just it was just like a terrible week. But I I just didn't know how how I could fix it on my end of things, you know, like

6:16 it sounds like you can fix it in two ways. One, don't let this incident take away your character. And what do I mean by that? You said and you've continued to say, "I will show up to your place of work and do my absolute best in exchange for serving a customer and in exchange for a paycheck."

6:38 Mhm. And you've also decided I don't want to work here long term. Great. That's awesome. But now that like as the old saying goes, when your spirit leaves your workplace, your body should go ahead and follow it as soon as possible. And so the challenge for you is how do I keep my spirit here when I got embarrassed when I made a call and everyone around me said it's the wrong call and I still think the call in the moment was right, but I get what they're saying. Mhm.

7:07 How do you like not be buried in shame and embarrassment, take your lumps, stand back up tall, and say, "I regardless of the environment, I am not going to cash in my character and my dignity, I'm still going to show up here, put my head down, work as hard as I possibly can, learn my my lesson here, and at the same time, in the evenings, not on the clock, in the morning, I'm going to get up at 5:00 a.m. And I'm gonna stop throwing a bunch of LinkedIn stuff out there with AI cover letters, but I'm going to go call actual people doing actual jobs that I wanted to work in and I'm going to up my game in terms of uh getting out of here.

7:49 I see what you mean. Does that make sense? Cuz how old are you? I am 22. Okay. Part of working on a team is striking out to end a game. That happens especially when coach said, "Hey, when you go up there, he's going to throw you a curveball first. Don't swing." And you walk right up. He throws a curveball and you swing and whiff. And then coach goes, "I told you." And and you have that embarrassment.

8:15 Mhm. Part of you moving into like a profession is feeling a certain way, making a call, and it's the wrong call or maybe it was right for you, but it was wrong for the company that you serve and taking your lumps. And I could, if your leaders were calling me, if your supervisors and bosses were calling me, I I speak at business events all over the country. I would tell them, "Dude, you have a 22-year-old no not no disc here, but you have a 22-y old kid. It's his first job. It's a gas leak. Relax."

8:45 Mhm. Bring the kid in, say, "Hey, I get why you made this call. Don't do that in the future. Here's all this is, and we need to do a better job of a training you all, and b having a hotline that y'all can call." You get what I'm saying? that's what they should do and they didn't.

9:01 And so you get to decide. Am I gonna quiet quit? Am I gonna at 22 decide I'm a person who if I have a strong feeling, even if it's wrong, I'm going to take my ball and go home or am I going to take my lumps? By the way, they're going to be on to the next drama next week.

9:20 I'm going to put my head down. I will be the best worker humanly po in this building. I will outwork everybody. And I'm going to prove not only to them but to myself that I can take my lumps even if it's not given the right way. And I'm going to keep showing up here and working to serve the customer who's buying whatever products that we're making. You get what I'm saying? What I don't want you to do here is cash out just because you had a feeling and you made a call and the call was wrong and your bosses haven't handled it great. Fine.

9:54 Yeah. I think I see what you're Yeah. So kind of like be the bigger person and kind of move on.

10:00 It's not about being the bigger person. It's never letting external situations take your dignity and your integrity from you.

10:08 I see. And and if you want to if you want to say I don't want to be the bigger person here, then the integrous thing to do would be to walk in and quit. I will not work for somebody who treats their employees this way when they make a mistake. and you're 22 and you're probably in a position where you don't have 6 months of an emergency fund somewhere where you can do that.

10:31 Yeah. And and that's another thing my hope is this is a moment for you where you say I never want to be beholden to a boss again. And so I'm going to work for the next four years and not owe anybody anything. I'm going to drive a crummyier car. I'm going to pay all my student loans off. I am gonna save and have six months of my expenses in a in in a checking account, a high yield savings account. That way, if anyone ever disrespects me, calls me out and embarrasses like whatever, if my boss ever shows they're not person of character, I can walk right out the door.

11:07 And here's what's crazy about that. as a 22-year-old when you have that sort of security outside of the office, you stand a little bit taller and you challenge just a little bit more. And I don't know why or how this works, but supervisors and bosses tend to respond to that with, "Oh, that guy's got leadership potential. That guy screwed up." and then held his own, said he's sorry, smiled, shook my hand, said it won't happen again, walked out. I like that confidence. I don't know why or how that works. But when somebody feels like you don't need this thing, everybody, it elevates the interaction.

11:52 Does that make sense? Yeah, for sure. And so, man, this is one of those beautiful moments for you. There's 25 25 different lessons you can learn here. 30 different lessons here. And I almost think the greatest lesson you can learn, not from anybody else, but for your own grit and resilience and inner strength, is actually I'm not going to quit. I'm going to keep going in here where it quote unquote feels and I'm going to practice being a person of such high character and integrity. I'm going to work my butt off. As long as I'm taking their check, I'm going to go all in every day.

12:32 I see. Does that make sense? And I know every one of your roommates is like, "Screw them. Get out of here."

12:37 And if we look around, there's too many 30-year-old men like us living in their mom's basement still.

12:44 Yeah, that's that is a fear cuz they have a feeling like I don't feel safe. I don't feel like my boss likes me. I don't feel And they just leave cuz they're letting her feelings run their life. Bro, I have done interviews in this new job I'm in on national media and I have blown it, right? It has not felt good. And I could choose to just be like, I quit. Or I could be like, you're right. I'm going to own it. I'm going to head back in. And I am blessed at a place where supervisors across my company that I work for, even the CEO, the president, those are different people. I I know I can go sit down with them and that's where I'm here long term. And you if you don't have that, that's fair. That's a good call out. I don't want to work for that company long term because the leadership's going to crash that place at some point. But you get to decide you're going to be a person of resilience moving forward. Are you in?

13:41 Yeah, totally. I love the This sounds crazy. I love the spiritual end um exercise for you here. This is how a young man grows in strength and resilience and confidence. which is

13:56 I I um I thought it was like Go ahead. Oh, sorry. No, go ahead. No, I was just going to say um I thought it was, you know, like such a regrettable experience, but I think um you're helping me realize it's like for my youth, it's something I should be thankful for.

14:10 Well, yeah. Yeah, dude. And would I want you to go through it again? No. And you can be regretful, a regrettable experience. It can be an uncomfortable experience. And it can be a refining strength building experience, too. It's who are you going to be after the thing happened. That's character. And maybe you learned at 22, okay, my feelings aren't always right. Or I'm going to make a call when I don't feel safe. I'm going to always default to safety. And sometimes I'm going to overswing, especially at 22. Especially with a gas leak for God's sakes, right?

14:47 Yeah. That doesn't make you crazy. But I think two and by the way, this is going to happen in in in a romantic relationship. You're going to do something that you think is right. You're going to have a feeling about something. You're going to make a call and your your significant other, your romantic partner is going to blow up. They're not going to they're going to they're going to withdraw. They're going to run. They're going to break up with you. They're going to do something like ah and you're going to decide, oh, I don't feel fill in the blank.

15:19 What's the next right thing beneath that feeling? Because feelings aren't designed to tell us the truth. They're designed to keep us safe. And so your feelings in this moment, you heard you heard a twig snap in the forest and you went running and they're like, "Dude, that was just a squirrel. Could have been a bear. Could have eaten you, but it was a squirrel." And it's almost always going to be a squirrel. All right, I'm going to learn that. That's just wisdom. That is just experience and wisdom. So, dude, I think you're right.

15:44 I think your your bosses didn't handle this right. I think you probably overreacted and all that's true and you probably feel some guilt and you probably feel some shame and you probably feel like and they're beating up on you because you're 22 and you're new. Fine. The question is who are you going to be now and I will not let them have my dignity. I will not let them have my integrity and that means two things. One, I'm going to keep show if I'm going to take their paycheck. I'm going to keep showing up giving my 100%.

16:11 Because me quiet, quitting, me being like that says everything about me and nothing about them. The second thing is I am going to start at 22. I have a goal at 25 I will be completely completely I won't owe anybody any money. I'm going to have some cash in the bank that I'm not investing and putting in crypto. I'm going to have some cash in the bank so that if in the future I need to walk, I can smile and shake their hand and say, "Cool. You'll have my resignation by the end of the day. You'll have a great day. I'm have a smile on my face because I am going to have a foundation that I can anchor into, not the whims of some boss that likes to beat up 22-y olds. So, well played, brother. The next move for you is going to give you a trajectory on the man you are going to become.

16:59 And man, these are those these are those make orb breakak moments for for young men. And I've been there, dude. My suggestion to you is take your lumps on this one. Keep showing up and working hard. If you don't want to be in this business long term, great. But don't let let anybody have your integrity.

Questions about this episode

Who speaks in "I No Longer Feel Safe at Work, but I Can’t Leave"?

Dr. John Delony (Host), Unknown Caller (Guest).

What is "I No Longer Feel Safe at Work, but I Can’t Leave" about?

The content explores the author's unsettling experience of dealing with a gas leak at their workplace and the subsequent lack of support from management, leading to feelings of insecurity and fear. Despite considering leaving the job due to the negative environment, they are hesitant because of ongoing job applications and financial responsibilities, highlighting the challenges of workplace…

What is mentioned in this The Dr. John Delony Show episode?

1 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including Grokipedia. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "I No Longer Feel Safe at Work, but I Can’t Leave"?

The episode runs 17 min; the transcript is about 3,241 words in 47 timestamped sections.

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