Transcript

RHOSLC S615: You Can Grape Leaves!

From Watch What Crappens · Episode page · Watch on YouTube

· 1 h 10 min · 14,127 words · 175 timestamped sections

This is the full, timestamped transcript of "RHOSLC S615: You Can Grape Leaves!", an episode of Watch What Crappens published January 14, 2026 (1 h 10 min, about 14,127 words). It mentions 3 people, works and ideas, including Chanel, Golden Krappies, The Secret Language of Trees.

What this episode is about

The main topic highlights the excitement surrounding the upcoming Golden Krappies event, set for February 27th in Los Angeles, with tickets becoming available soon and a pre-sale option for Patreon members. Additionally, the hosts express their enthusiasm for the current awards season, including attending the Golden Globe nominations announcement.

Key takeaways

  • Golden Krappies: Where 'non-nomination' is the new 'almost winning'—a triumph in celebration of irreverent fandom.
  • Patreon perks: Instant ticket access—because who doesn't want to be first in line for messy drama?
  • Salt Lake City’s finale proves slapstick survives—who knew one clumsy moment could send a season spiraling?
  • An annual ceremony for reality chaos? The only awards that let you vote for your favorite mess.
  • Real-life bruises and bloody lips: a reminder that in reality TV, falling flat is just part of the fun.

Who speaks in this episode?

What is discussed, and when

  1. – 10:00: Golden Krappies
  2. – 20:00: Chanel
  3. – 50:00: Chanel, The Secret Language of Trees

Notable quotes from "RHOSLC S615: You Can Grape Leaves!"

  • Have a very big announcement for today, which is that the Golden Krappies are back, baby. We have now an official date. They're going to be on February 27th here in Los…
    about Golden Krappies · at
  • Just like bold colors. I don't know if you noticed, but like Lisa, she put like a little Chanel pin like around her waistline as if it were like a Chanel dress. I was Lisa…
    about Chanel · at
  • The falls. So then, now they all head out and Lisa is Have you guys ever read this the secret language of trees? Oh my gosh, it's the most beautiful thing, guys. I love to read…
    about The Secret Language of Trees · at

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

Books & papers

Products & tech

Concepts & topics

Full transcript with timestamps

Welcome to Watch What Crappins. To get our videos as soon as they're released instead of waiting for a week, head over to our Patreon. That's also where you'll find our bonus episodes and our Discord community. We love you guys. Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Cravens. I'm Ronnie. That's Ben over there. Hello, Ben.

Hi, Ronnie. How's it going? Good. How's it going over there with you? Well, I am really excited because we have a very big announcement for today, which is that the Golden Krappies are back, baby. We have now an official date. They're going to be on February 27th here in Los Angeles. It's a Los Angeles year. We go back and forth, New York and LA. and it's going to be at the Fonda Theater. This will be Friday, February 27th, and tickets will be going on sale this Friday at 10:00 a.m. Pacific. Furthermore, if you are a Patreon member, you have access to our pre-sale, which is on Thursday, which will be tomorrow. And that's going to go from 10:00 a.m. to 10:00 p.m. Pacific time.

So, you get uh you get a a window a window of time to access those tickets ahead of everyone else. So, we are really really excited. We are really thrilled. Last year's was like life-changing and wonderful and we're just going to try to top it again this year. And of course, there will be live streaming. Uh we will have more details about that when that is set up, but that's not ready to go just yet, but we don't want to delay the tickets. So, be sure to go get your tickets and um we will have that ticket link up on Friday at watch what crapins.com.

Yes. Are you excited, Ronnie? Yes. I'm so excited. It's awards season. We're going to go to the Golden Globe nominations announcement tomorrow.

So, it's pretty fancy. Yeah. Yeah. It's pretty. So, we're going to walk around there like

what's that? I said we weren't shortlisted for the Golden Globes, but it's an honor just to be non-nominated

in a room with the people that were nominated. Oh, yeah. They have a podcast category this year. Well, at least we can go there and be like, "Fuck all of you. [ __ ] all of you. How dare you?

This is a I just realized as I was saying this, I was like, "Oh, I guess I should put the ticket link on our website." I'll put Let me put that on my to-do list. Actually, put actual ticket link up. But, um, we will have all those details. It'll be on our social media. It'll be everywhere. Um, there was something else I was going to say about it, but just that it's going to be a great time. Uh,

yeah, it's going to be so exciting. It's a great season because that means category formation, category voting. It's about to be a long season for all of us to get involved. Um, create the show with us, you know, which is always super fun. So, that will be coming out. Uh, tickets will be coming Friday. So, come. It's going to be a good time. Good time in Los Angeles, people.

And keep an eye and keep an eye out on our social media because like Ronnie said, we do have to create the ballot. So, the first step is we're going to solicit ideas of what your favorite moments fights villains details quotes. We want to get all that information because we've been trying to like keep notes all year long, but it's just really hard. And we we're going to gather it all up and then we're going to have a round one of voting which is like who makes it onto the ballot and then we will have round two which is the ballot itself and then step three of course is the ceremony itself where we will announce the winners. So it's always such a fun fun time for us. Yes. Okay.

Well, today is also a very special day because it's the season finale of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City in real time. But guess what? We were on vacation last week and sometimes we just can't pass things up on vacation. This is one of them. We have to cover last week's episode, Opas and Outbursts. So, we're going to start with that. Season 6, episode 15, Opas and Outbursts, Angie's Greece Trip on Salt Lake City. So, here we are on day three of Angela's Greek trip.

Yes. And it opens up with my favorite way for a show to open up. good oldfashioned slapstick. People are waking up. They're in the they're in the kitchen, everything. And and we we see this like random cutaway shot of of just like a server putting like a like a jug of orange juice on the kitchen island. I'm thinking to myself, that's strange. Why would they show that? And then they cut to Angie walking down the hallway. And then we she sort of disappears around a corner. We hear a clatter and we see bowls and apples rolling on the floor.

And it becomes evident that Angie has somehow stumbled into this poor waiter who had a giant tray of their entire breakfasts and disaster has ensued. Tray to the face, stuff all over the floor. She's bleeding again and um she's bleeding on the lip. I mean, God bless her. She's already lost a finger this season. Lots going on with Angie. And um Braum was like, "Angie, you should you should travel with a reusable ice pack at this point." No. Everywhere we go, I'm like, could someone hit her in the face with the tray? Make her head stop shaking. It's like a bobblehead that just stop it. Get her with the tray. Why do you always get the wrong ones? I feel like I'm going to steal Magnolia. It's like here, hit Wheeza.

So, Angie is She has So, not only did she crash into the tray, I guess this is the perils of being a shorter person is that when she crashed into the tray, she was at tray height. So, um, she literally she somehow like cut her the inside of her lip with a glass that went flying. I don't know how this happens. I feel like in all the years of watching slapstick scenes of people crashing into waiters with trays, we've never seen someone emerge with a bloody lip. And normally, it's a cake in the face. I was expecting her to come around the corner with frosting all over her face like Mrs.

Doubtfire, but somehow she had a bloody lip. Yeah. So, um, you know, she wants to cry and stuff and Lisa's like, "Oh my god, it's like you have a fat lip, right?" And Bra's like, "No, her lip always looks like that. She pays a lot of money for her lip to look like that." [singing] So then we cut to Meredith and she's out by the pool and Lisa comes out there and she's like, "Hi, good morning. What are you doing out here?" She's like, "Well, I'm just sitting here and I put a little mask on and I got to let it sit for 20 minutes so you look good." And she's Lisa's like, "Thank you. Yeah, this lady here, she does such a good job with my makeup. I wish I could take her back with me. Bring her back to America.

Well, first of all, I slept really well last night like a rock. Okay. Like a good old Chevy truck. When they sing that song about the pickup trucks, they're singing about the way I slept last night, which was very much needed.

Yeah. And Meredith is in her I'm happy voice. She's like, "Hi, honey." You know that voice she does? She's she's just putting happiness everywhere. And Lisa's like, "Wow, you seem happier, Eric." So, um, Meredith is like, "Well, I don't think pina coladas help you sleep, Lisa." Well, you know what? I had so much fun last night. I just crashed. And so, we see a flashback to the girls dancing and drinking and having fun. And she's like, "Oh, that was fun. That was actually really fun, honey." And so she's going to start, you know, Meredith has had to reset 90 times this season, but God bless her. She just keeps coming out and she's like, "Today I'm going to be positive and no one is going to mess with me because I'm going to have such a positive attitude, but that would disrupt the plans for the whole season, so it's not going to work." But right now, she's like, "Well, I'm starting the day on a good no."

Like, we are greens. We are friends. We love being salad. and let's just pull it together and have some fun.

Um, we'll see how that goes. It's not gonna work. Yeah. Yeah. Like you mentioned, she's been she's had to restart many times. She's basically like my water heater at this point, which is that like every day I have to go up there and like unplug it and plug it back in so that way I get hot water. So now

Yeah. It's just a car that you never know if it's it's going to be able to start. You just hear it down in the winter cold like it's like, "Oh gosh, it's gonna start up. It's going to start up. So Angie is talking.

It started. It started. Yes. So Angie is talking to Artemis, the wardrobe designer. Um and the fine the fine dress photo shoot is a quintessential Greek experience. You pick a gorgeous dress and then we get our photos taken on the epic white stairs of Oya and it's going to be a keepsake that they can have for the rest of their lives. Well, I mean, this is nice and everything. They're going to do a photo shoot been shoot in like bright colors on the stairs of Santorini, but I mean, Angie's acting like she just she's giving everyone Fabra eggs. Like, it's just one of a million photo shoots that these women do at all times.

And she actually made it out of this unscathed because usually it does not end well when you bring outfits for the other housewives. It never it never works out well. Dubai.

I do not wear I do not wear mustard yellow. Yeah, but it worked, you know. And um Britney comes in and she's like, "Oh, I love the orange." And she leaves and Angie's like, "Wow, Artemis, she picked the ugliest color." Haha. Haha. So Lisa's like, "I don't know why every trip we have to go on involves dressing up. Like usually I show up to the point where like I walk into a beach club and people are like, I die for your outfit." And like the only thing I liked was when they all dressed like me. And we see a flashback to like the Lisa the Lisa party.

That was a good one. The the the lunch of a thousand Lisa's where everybody had to dress up like Lisa for lunch. She

like, "Hi, we're here for Lisa's. Lisa's here for lunch." So they greet their photographer. Okay. So now they have their photo shoot. And um

one thing I noticed, by the way, real quickly is that when they all walked out in these dresses, they're these big flowing dresses in largely primary, well, not primary colors, but they're just like bold colors. I don't know if you noticed, but like Lisa, she put like a little Chanel pin like around her waistline as if it were like a Chanel dress. I was like, "Lisa, this is these are dresses by Artemis. This is not a Chanel dress. Why are you putting a little Chanel pendant on it?" That's it was the funniest thing.

Um, so Bronwin is watching Angie pose and she's like, "Go an, you look like a mother." I think it's just mother. I don't think it you're supposed to say you look like a mother, right? Does she mean it in the gay way or does she mean it in the Mother's Day way?

It was actually a call back to Meredith's Bach Mitzvah because the the high body count here. What preceded it was Angie saying, "Look at the way you dress. I look I look like a mother. You look like a slut." basically. So that was like when she it was a call back to Angie saying that she dresses she looks beautiful. She's dressed like a like a good mother.

Oh that's funny. So um then Britney is like you don't she's like I don't even need a countdown. Just take a bunch. I'll just move around a little bit. Just focus on my teeth. Focus on my teeth. Britney is always taking pictures like she's got she's asking you if she's got something stuck between her front two teeth. You know the cilantro.

Yeah. Oh, Britney. Britney is um she's just she's just a treasure. A treasure in Greece right now. Um so then Britney is like she's like I feel like a ray of sunshine wearing orange. I feel like EOS, the goddess of the morning sky. Yes. [screaming] I was so proud of Britney that she looked up a Greek goddess. That she looked up EOS and wasn't confused by that by that. Isn't that also the name of a gym? EOS. Eios Jim. It's also the name of a captain at Disneyland, played by Michael Jackson.

Yeah. Without the s at the end. So, all the girls are posing and they have to say what Greek goddesses they've be. And uh Mary is like, I want to be the Greek goddess of realness. You're a Greek goddess of taking old people's money for your purses from your church.

Oh, we have the documentary. We have it. [clears throat] I can't wait to see what they do next year with Mary's documentary. Do you think anyone's going to bring it up

again? Um, even though they did four years ago and nobody seems to remember. Depends on how desperate Whitney is for content.

Yeah. How bold they are because they seem scared like to say anything. I think they're just like just leave Mary alone, you know.

Yeah. So Heather um is like I would be the Greek goddess of feta if I didn't smell weird. There probably already is a Greek goddess of Feda. I'm just going to say that right now. I'm like I feel like if you really dive deep into the the myths, the Greek myths, there's like a Greek god or goddess for like really everything that was part of Greek culture like you know thousands of years ago. So like I'm just my I don't know why I'm taking this stance. I'm like no Heather, you don't get to be the Greek goddess of feta. That already exists.

Choose a different cheese [ __ ] I'm like mad at her. I'm not going to let her have feta. There is no Yeah, there is no Feta Greek goddess. I looked it up. There is however however Vesta who was the virgin goddess of the hearth home and the family. But you know that's different.

Feta doesn't get to like take that mantle. Yeah. I mean who does she think she is? Histus. [clears throat] What do you think you are? Deer. Why don't you go back to Hades? Pphanie. Well, I would be the goddess of the sea because I could be swimming with all the sturgeon to get more caviar. Fun narrative. Fun narrative.

It is stealing babies. Stealing babies from stealing babies from the ocean. They really like the producers were like, "Here's a fun game." Which, by the way, I I'm like, okay, producers of Bravo, I'm okay if we stop doing these games with all the housewives where we go around the horn and talk about some sort of like, what would you do in this situation? Like, I'm okay if we don't do these anymore. Like, I don't love them. But also, it's like hilarious that they really don't know what to do here. Like, oh, I have to be I'm going to be the great goddess of toddlers. Like, well, that sounds [clears throat] a little weird.

Little fish toddlers. What do you mean, caviar? I would be the goddess of um little cats sitting on dashboards going like this every time he went over a speed bump. I would be the Greek goddess of uh banana splits with uh cherries on top that no one seals.

So meanwhile, Whitney and Heather are the goddesses of trying to start [ __ ] when nothing bad is going on. Like everybody's having a good day and Whitney's like, "Mother is serving. By the way, Heather, have you noticed how happy Meredith is today? She's like, "Yeah, she's happy as a clam." Like old Meredith. Let's break this. Brown was like, "Um, I want to whisper. What are you guys whispering about?" Well, just Meredith. I mean, she's like had a full switch up. I mean, is this since the pool? Yeah. How long do you think it's going to last? I bet it doesn't last a whole trip. Well, based on her pattern, it'll last until tomorrow morning. Based on her pattern, it'll last until you two [ __ ] it up and make her cry again.

Like, yes, that is the pattern. Okay, first of all, they're they're acting like a Meredith Marks mood swing is a new thing. Have you have they not been watching this show since season 1? This is what Meredith Marks does, especially on vacation. How many times have we seen Meredith fully screaming at her castmates and then it cuts to them like all coorting in the hot tub? Like I'm like this this the the Meredith Mark swings that's just part of who she is. That's what we all love about her.

Yeah, she's a swinger. So, also, by the way, I also would like to say if I'm on vacation with someone and they are cranky as [ __ ] the night before and they wake up in a good mood, I'm not questioning it. I'm happy for it. I'm like, "Thank God." And I'm moving forward and I'm not trying to mess it up again. But these two are actively trying to drag her back into it every single instance. And obviously I think most of us have seen the season finale. It just happens all over again. And it's like it's it's it's enraging at a certain point. Like just stop it already.

Yeah. So half the ladies are going to go to lunch and half the ladies are going to go to the spa. Um, Meredith, Lisa, and um, and Aexia, sorry, that's the name of the spot. Heather, Britney, Meredith, and Lisa are going to Aexia, the Greek goddess of spas. And Meredith is pointing out, she's like, um, well, guys, I just want everyone to see that there's a quiet zone sign. Well, there are only two volumes in this group. Loud and louder. So then uh we go to the other three at lunch and they're just sort of talking about the dresses and everything and um talk to and and so funny. They're just making all the small talk like, "Wow, we got to make dresses. That was so fun making dresses. Wow, dresses. Dresses was stupid." You know, Mary, she's like, "That was dumb. Let's talk about Meredith. I'm worried that Meredith is an alcoholic and a drug addict.

Aholic. Meredith is a drugaholic. What are we gonna do about it? Oh, for Christ.

Here we go. [ __ ] me. Yeah, they're speculating about Meredith. They're concerned. All All three of them are actually quite concerned. Um Mary is very, very concerned. And uh she Mary is is

I just want to point out that they're concerned because Meredith is in a good mood today. So that's why they're very concerned at lunch. Okay. They already had this planned out where they're going to get together and talk about how concerned they are and make Meredith out to be an alcoholic again. But Meredith showed up in a good mood and they can't even change their plan. They're like, "Well, let's let's just still show up and talk about how worried we are about Meredith." Did you see Meredith this morning smiling, laughing, and having a good time?

We should institutionalize her. Yeah. So Mary is saying that she feels like Meredith is fragile and she's like, "That's not my Meredith." You know, Meredith's going through something and it's really taking a toll on her mental. You know, that's just something she's That's why she's acting. It's her behavior. Something's wrong. Like there too many highs and too many lows and too many mediums. I'm like, there's too many highs, too many lows, and too many mediums. It seems like you're averaging out to be

pretty standard. Sounds like sanity. But I I feel like Mary is the only is the one who when she is concerned like I do think that there's like a little bit of like a red flag there because like I don't think Mary is the type like Whitney is the type to be concerned and and you question whether or not she's really concerned or she's just trying to have like a moment on TV. But I feel like Mary when she's concerned that's like a genuine thing. But I also think that Mary's probably extra sensitive to it right now because of stuff going on in her life. So maybe there is a possibility that she might be reading into things too much. It's a little hard to say, but um they are both

I don't think it's more important that Mary's concerned. And I don't get that. I don't I don't I don't I mean I do get it. I get what you're saying, but I don't agree. Like I don't trust Mary's I don't trust Mary's instinct more than anybody else's. I don't know where that comes from. I mean, Mary seems the most and it's like an audience thing, not just a you thing because I feel like that's like a pretty I think I feel like everyone's like, "Well, Mary's saying it." So Mary's one of the most um emotionally unstable here. Like when we've seen Mary fight with people, it's like, "Oh my god, do you remember when I called you and you didn't call me back because you were doing carpool? How dare you?" And she has a fit and leaves a restaurant, won't speak to somebody for like 6 months. Like I don't know that I would really trust Mary's, you know, emotional regulation skill. I think that there she's just very easily led by the

other people and these people the whole season are like, "Oh my god, she's a alcoholic like my father." And then Mary's like, "Oh my god, drug and alcohol is that's a very important thing to me right now because of my son. I'm very upset about drug and al you know." So I don't know. I don't I don't really rely on Mary as my litmus test for people's emotional well-being. Are you saying that the brainwasher has become the brainwashy? So,

exactly. Especially seeing how many people Mary has put through emotional hell on that.

That's a fair point. We do forget that she um is has quite the history of um being in really skewed str or taking strange stances on arguments. So, there is that. But I do think that Mary will not go down this path just for TV. I I don't think that there's a cynical um element to her her feelings the way I think there is a cynical element to Whitney and Brunwin juries out a little bit but um but Mary feels like she that that Meredith is suffering and she has a whole big monologue here and uh she talks about how it's a lot cuz she's dealing with it with her child. She recognizes the behaviors and when she sees Meredith, it just like tugs at her in a whole different light because she recognizes it and uh she's seen the signs with her son and she just knows that something is is just not right. So then Bronwin chimes in. She's like, "Mhm. Mhm. Mhm.

Well, um I'm also worried about something and it feels weird. Um I was just looking at Meredith and I thought, gosh, would she ever be able to have a bob? I don't think she could." And that's like really disturbing to me. Mhm. That's like a real big issue for me. I don't think I can get by that.

Mhm. Yeah. Well, we have like a we have a whole Whitney monologue like it's like my dad because one minute we're good and the next minute he would rage and Meredith is just like that. I'm like you're on a housewife show. Like you just described the blueprint for a housewife show.

Um so they decide that she needs help. Yeah. And then Bronin switches it. Swan Brun switches it to Okay. Well, now that we're talking about how much she needs help, let me just like straight up betray her right now and like make sure that we send her into an emotional spiral. These people are all vipers. I feel like at this

Well, Bron Bronwin now [clears throat] does this whole thing where she goes, "Well, so something happened in January." So, I've been thinking about it for a couple months now, and I thought the cast trip would be the time to to bring it out. And I ran into Seth out in New York. Todd and I were at this Italian restaurant and you know he stops and he said hi to Todd and Todd's like what are you doing and he was like oh I'm with an investor just felt weird just just felt weird I'm like uh this is this feels this does not this feels like a we like a I don't think this is strong evidence for Bronwin and I feel like this is salacious and I don't think that Bronwin Bronwin doesn't like it when people have insinuated about her and her

Bronwin literally just made a rule two weeks ago that we can't talk about each other's husbands. Like she cried and she had this whole thing and like, "Okay, fine. If we're moving on, then no talking about each other's husbands." And then here she is two weeks later insinuating that this man is having an affair. The man works in New York. Who cares if he's out with a woman? Are men not allowed to go have she's ridiculous. Yeah, I think this is a little bit ridiculous. And so Mary is saying, "Well, what are you saying?" And Braraw says, "I'm saying I saw Seth with a woman in a restaurant." I mean, Brawin is doing some heavy implications here.

And which is, by the way, that is straight out of the Meredith Mark's playbook to be fair. This is that's what Meredith would say. I'm just saying I thought that's all. And you want to imply something, but I never said it. But you I mean, I just wish Brwood would would say it looked like he was cheating. I'm just say it. Just Just put it out there. She doesn't want to say she wants She want I mean she does, but she doesn't. So she says Mhm. Mhm. Well, my first thought was not was not, oh, Seth's on a date with someone because I'm not like that and I wouldn't want someone to assume that. But I start to feel like as I watch her be so defensive when people talk about our marriage, like there's something wrong here. Like when I was going through soothing, you know, something with Todd and I wasn't all the way through it. I was very defensive. Mhm. So, she's saying, "No, it wasn't a date at all, but you know,

Meredith is so defensive, so I wonder if something's going on between the two of them." I'm like,

I'm not saying it's a date at all. I'm just saying I'm very worried about Meredith because Seth was caught with a woman in a restaurant. Like we're not all idiots. You're very clear in what you're saying. And she's like, "Oh gosh, you know, I'm just I feel vulnerable." Mhm. Because you know when you and your partner Rocky, it's just so scary. Oh my god. Get your husband off [ __ ] Instagram porn first of all before you come in. I don't know. I don't know why I'm feeling so defensive for Meredith in this because I see that Meredith has problems as well. But I just see these people as being so gross, especially Bronnin.

Especially for Brunwin to be the grossest when she's surrounded by Whitney and Heather is pretty bad. But I think Brunwin is the worst here for doing her whole crying and let's leave our husbands out of it and no when she's starting this. And she was also kind of the one who brought up the Tik Tok thing, wasn't she? With um like she heard

uh was she or was that that was Britney? That was Britney. And who did Britney who was Britney? Britney and Whitney. Okay.

I do agree that like if you you can't do a whole revolutionary war, new constitution, don't talk about all these things and then you talk about it. I do I actually believe that Braramwin's concern is sincere because I think Bromewin is going through something similar. So she's just as Mary is going through something that that seems similar that like when you feel what's going on in your life, you you want to help someone that you feel like is is going through it as well. So I I actually feel like I don't feel like Bronwin is is being um like insincere and just trying to like get Meredith for the show. But I do think like she should be more considerate considering that she just had this whole thing about like we're not talking about this stuff and you know we we're gonna like we're going to be focusing on sisterhood or whatever yada yada yada I think she's being 100% insincere and shitty for the show to be

friends with the other I'll have to I'll have to respectfully disagree with you all though. I think she's just being completely shitty with this whole thing. Who does that? who does that like two weeks after being like, "No, don't come for the husband to be like, well, she her husband was seen with somebody else." And I just worry because she seems scared to death. She just seems scared to death. She's scared to death of you people. She can't have one week without you guys accusing her of being a drug addict or her husband cheating on her. So,

what do you expect? So, Mary Mary's like, "Well, I feel like if stuff is said and it's not true, then it doesn't bother you."

Oh, okay. Well, we'll see. We'll see when it happens to you. We'll just go back to like about the past like five reunions, Mary, with people talking uh asking questions about you and your cult. So then um uh we now go to the girls at the spa and everyone they have to whisper because it's a quiet spa which is great. And then they're so they're walking in this like this like a water kind of path. They're walking through it and they're being quiet and they're walking and then Britney comes by. She's like, "Hey guys." And then she starts splashing them with water and they're all like really annoyed because it's like a spa. This is not like a public pool.

Yeah, but it's also housewives. They just hate Britney. They just hate her. Oh my god, they hate her. Heather would have been doing the same thing. Uh but Britney beat her to it. So now they're like, "How dare you?" And Heather's like, "Well, Britney's doing what everyone hates, which is being Britney and bringing the playful la attitude to what should be a very serious spa day." So Angie's basically saying like, you know, god, Lisa is so immature. And Meredith is like, no one in a spa is splashing each other. It's the wrong environment. And maybe she's never been to the spa. I don't know.

We don't want to be redoing our hair before dinner tonight. Stop doing that. It's rude. It's very rude.

But she So Britney's like, "But we're in Greece. I mean, have a little fun. Last trip I had buckets of water being poured over my head and you guys can't even handle a little splashy splash. I'm like, well, a cuz you're Britney and you're a friend of and the rule of friend of apparently on this show is that you can throw water on or liquids on people's heads. Let's cut into Jen Shaw pouring champagne on Angie K's head season 3. But um also was a yah. I don't know. I I agree. Don't don't don't be doing splashy splash. Although actually it wasn't really that bad of a splash.

It was like a flick. I think they're like, "Shut up, Britney. Shut up, Britney."

I think it's not really fair. They're coming for Britney for this. This is silly. So, then we uh the girls are now in robes sitting in the quiet zone. We keep seeing quiet uh quiet zone close-ups, and Lisa's like, "Hey, you guys, I just want I want to remind you. You have to whisper. It's a quiet zone. It's a quiet zone." Yeah. Hi. Why did you get their hair wra? She had a fresh blowout. Yes. It took me an hour to blow my hair out this morning with a bad hand. Yeah. And you poured water on it. Yeah. I had a really bad morning with dry hair and now it's wet hair. Why did you do that and now it's crusty?

Because I just wanted to lighten the mood, you guys. Well, why did the mood need to be lightened? We're in a dense state. We don't need to be lightened. And she's like, but I mean, you're a hair expert. And she's like, who cares? It takes an hour. But it does not take her an hour. She's an expert. She says,

"Yeah, but you know what? It's because your hair is synthetic and it doesn't take as long.

That's why you have fake hair. Like, it doesn't take as long to comb a ziplockc bag. That's just how it is." No, it's real hair. It came from my real head. It has real follicles. Okay. Well, it feels

I stole it from my daughter while she was sleeping. We just wanted to be closer.

Yeah, my hair feels crusty. It's like people's piss. cut to Olivia walking into a musical theater rehearsal just with a shaved head. Like you guys, I don't know what happened. I don't know what happened.

It's my mother. All I saw on the ring cam was a little unicorn. I don't know. It said, "You are loved." So Angie's like, "I wash my hair with the most expensive product. I scissor the treatment in and I blow it out with full tension so it looks like glass. And then I finish it off with a very nice oil. And this takes some serious work." So, there's a reason that your hair looks like it does and mine looks like it does. Which I love. That's why yours looks like it does, and that's why mine looks looks like it does.

This is called effort. I am Greek. What does scissoring stuff into your hair mean?

Um, it's like when you do your hair, but you're also having a lesbian experience. Just kidding. Um, no. I think it's like you put like you put it I think like you put it in your hair but you take um well scissoring I thought it was like you brush it in. I don't scissoring it in. The way she the way she showed it was like she was taking like a like a brush or a comb and kind of combing it in like that. Let me see. How do you scissor

scissor product into Yeah, I want to know where scissoring product into your hair is. I find the the world of hair to be so interesting as a as a non as a hair non-abled person as a follically as a dyspholically aabled person. I don't know. I don't know what the nice term would be. I don't want to say bald. It just sounds baldist. But I just I'm curious like it's a whole different world. Maybe um she means like scraping it into the hair because according to um Google AI, which as we all know is a very accurate source, scissoring product into your hair isn't a standard term, but it likely refers to using hair cutting techniques with scissors to create texture or applying products like texture powder to achieve similar scissor or maybe sounds dangerous for Angie, especially accidentrone Angie to just be putting product in her hair with scissors. But you know what? Who am I to judge? A bold person, that's who. Okay,

so Britney's like, "This is so irritating. I mean, you guys are supposed to be my friends. I mean, no one's even asked me if Olivia texted me yesterday." And she goes, "Okay, well then why would you say something nasty to me when I was upset about a similar situation?"

Well, I'm just saying at least you got to see your kids. I didn't get to see mine for 3 years. Yeah, but you said that was based on your choices, not based on anything else. No, it was like not based on my choices. Like you have no idea what I've been through. You have no idea. It's like actually they all know because you keep on talking about it. Yeah, you [clears throat] said they know because you said it. And Lisa's like, "Yeah, but you know what? You said to the group, I remember it was when you had really terrible crinkly ziplockc hair and you said like based on your decisions, your kids do do you know you put men before your kids." You said that. You said that you even put men before conditioner or hot oil treatments. So, you said that. You're the one who said it. She

did. But like I was being very vulnerable and self-deprecating and dry-haired. And dry-haired as well.

Yeah. Dryhaired. Dryhaired and not famous on Broadwayish. No. What? Yeah. You were saying it in a very split-ended way. And uh she's like, "Don't you know what it's like? Don't don't judge her like on how she mothers when you don't want people to judge you based on how you mother." She's like, "Oh, okay. This is like totally apples and oranges. Okay. Well, how is it different? You can comment on my child, but I can't comment on your child. So, but you do it to deflect. I did not. We were in a in a [ __ ] cooking class where I was crying cuz it was Mother's Day and I didn't get to speak to my baby. It could have been his first words and you were in the middle of a heated argument and then you started crying.

So, now we see a a flashback to the van and they're still fighting about the high body count trademark, the high body hair, high count body hair or whatever. And um Britney's crying and she's like, "How could you guys come for me? Nobody even called me on Mother's Day."

Even though she meant Jared, by the way, that's probably what she really meant. And that they were like, "Britty, it's like it's still like noon over in Utah. It's like it's okay. So Meredith is like I didn't do that. Yeah. And then I thought you fake cried last night honestly cuz like Britney is theatrical like all the time and it's like she has like a checklist. It's like she's in the middle of an argument and then she's like okay I'm going to cry about Olivia now and I need empathy because I'm losing this argument. So cry cry cry about my daughters and I'm like it's like so pathetic and sad and like okay everyone feel bad for me. I need attention. Did I get enough? Yes.

Uncheck. which I'm like that is a very fair assessment, but also you guys all literally do that anytime you're caught in an argument. Like like especially Lisa Barlo. It's like, "Hey Lisa, what's going on with that money that you owe?" Oh my god, Henry. Henry's playing video games. It's just like a lot right now. I once was tied to a pole by my sisters.

Jack just had to have Jack just had to have dinner at a restaurant in Cambodia that didn't have a Michelin star. And it's really it's really hard for me. I had to go to Italy and eat food with like very fresh, beautiful ingredients.

Have you watched Lisa, by the way, on Worst Cooks in America? Cuz she's on that at the moment.

No. How is that? Have you watched it? Hell no. I'm not going to watch that. I mean, I I used to watch it, but like Food Network is just so it's like unwatchable now, but I was hoping that you would watch it. So,

especially with an gone. I'm not watching gone. I would watch it for a second with an because an had this way like she just had this way of being like I [ __ ] hate this with like her knee high panty hose or whatever. She'd just be like I [ __ ] hate all of you and I want you to die and I loved that attitude and without it I'm I just although with Lisa I mean I could see myself checking that out with Lisa. I didn't know it was on. Okay, I'll watch it. Okay, yes, we'll recap it. Okay, yes we'll do every season. We'll recap every season that we've missed so far. Fine.

So, RIP an miss you every day. I know. RIP and Burell. Love. Every time I cut an onion, I'm like, and Burell taught me how to do this. An [ __ ] Burell taught me how to do this.

I know. For real. I love in my actual kitchen. I mean, she was on TV, but I was in my kitchen.

Yeah. She was the best. So, Britney is like, "Well, so you thought I fake cried? Are you just saying that to to hurt my feelings?" No, I just think that you're dramatic. And Heather's like, "Well, it was real. I was there. I was there with the sisterhood." It's like, "No, I'm not kidding. I really thought it was fake." Well, guess what? You garnered the sympathy you needed and everybody softened and the whole dynamic changed. Oh, really? It changed? I don't think so. We got right back to it. You know, it's just sad. It's sad that I can't even speak up. And I'm sick of walking on eggshells around Meredith so that somebody or something doesn't set her off. It's just not fair.

So, is that what you do, Lisa? Like, you garner sympathy so that everyone will be softer with you. Is that what you do, Meredith? And she goes, "No, that is not what I do." And so, an employee comes in and she's like, "Please, please quiet soon. Please be quiet.

Please, please be quiet." So, Lisa, okay. Yeah. So, I'm going to say no whisper. You can't be like, "My kids mean more to me than her kids mean to her. And you especially can't say that when your hair is so dry. Yeah. But that's that's not what I was saying. Well, I came across that way. And I'm just saying she used it and she gets to see her kids like on the daily and I don't get to see mine. I had the worst mother say. Well, you know what? Because I break my ass stuff to make my relationships with my kids. Okay. So, don't you dare. Don't you dare. Don't you dare say things.

So, then she gets up. She's like, "I am going to." And she's like, "Oh, oh yeah. As if I don't try with my children. I just got my child some steamed milk." And told her, "Don't you remember when you used to get the steamed falafel?"

What? What they call it? The whiffle. The steamer. The steamer. Remember the steamers at Starbucks? And M's like, "I cannot stand her. Please be quiet, man. Please be quiet. I cannot do it anymore. I cannot stand her." So Britney's like, "Co away. Disengage, Meredith. Disengage. Yeah. Well, I don't want to be around you. I don't like you and you're absolutely despicable. I'm I hate you so much. I'm doing my my patented five finger pat down point at you. I am do not like you whatsoever. You are desperate. Well, it was going so well. Meredith was finally zen until the annoy little sister started to poke the bear. You know, Britney can never just leave things the way they are. She had to antagonize Meredith. And so Britney's like, "Well, then you can leave then."

Uh, and Angie goes, "And also, you keep using other people's lines. You can't do that. Don't trademark that." Yeah, don't trademark it. Please be quiet. Please, please be quiet. So, now we're back at the house and um Lisa gives Bronwin a mark on the chart next to stop the reactive abuse. So, Heather's so Heather's trying to steam her dress and Heather has one of those travel steamers and then all of a sudden the steamer starts exploding out liquid. Oh my god. I mean, how could the steamer do this to the sisterhood? You know, a lot of people might think that I'd be offended by taking it in the face while I'm steaming Whitney's dress, but I kind of liked it. Okay, we need to we need to officially reign in, Heather.

Like, it's it's it's too it's too much. Look at me. Just another sexually attractive, viable woman out here in the streets. What is this stream? What is this steamer? A Captain Jason streamer? It just splooed all over my face. What? I never said anything about Captain Jason. She um it's just too much winking at the audience. I can't anymore. Okay, I really can't. I need to get back to the Heather Gay that I fell in love with

who was like just sharing her truth and not not doing yada yada yada yada. Let me be let me do that. Let let me be really thirsty for laughs. Okay. But you you just you just live your truth, please.

Yeah. Well, she's always kind of been like this, you know, she's just getting needier as it goes on. You know, you would think that you'd get a little more confidence as the show went on and you gained more popularity and stuff, but it just she she just it's like you you the bigger your gulp, the thirstier you get, you know? It's weird.

Whoa. So, Heather's like, "Oh, and I would just like to point this out because it's Heather and Whitney in their room." And uh this becomes a huge plotline in a way later. So, I just like to point out that Heather says this. I'm serious. What happened at lunch?

Oh yeah, here we go. Because this becomes a cardinal sin later. Uh, but Whitney's like lunch was so sad. What did you talk about that was sad? Meredith. Her behavior and the way she's been showing up and our concerns about her. Brahmwin and Mary, we all talked about how we've noticed a change in Meredith. She might as well be walking around in a black mullet wig and watching me on a strip pole. She's so much like my dad.

And so, uh, Whitney was Whitney saying how Mary started to cry and was sweet and she loves Meredith so much. And Heather's like, "Well, what say?"

Whitney loves Meredith. Whitney has always just wanted to be friends with She's saying Mary loves Meredith. Mary loves Meredith.

Okay, thank you. So, Whitney's like, she's just worried about her. She's re She recognizes that her behavior is off and different. So Heather tells us, "I feel relieved that more people are concerned about Meredith. I just don't know that she can be unengaged and then immediately freak out and I don't understand it, but it's a pattern." Like, it's called being on the show, being happy, being angry. It's a pattern. And you just hit reset cuz if you don't hit reset, you're going to lose your mind.

You know what else is a pattern? um group dinners where you get belligerently drunk and start screaming at somebody and cutting them down in front of the whole group and then um uh abusing when abusing them as they walk away. I wonder if that's going to happen today. So Whitney's like, "Wow, I was really trying to figure out so many things. What was I trying to figure out?" Meredith. Meredith. The universe. Am I going to keep chasing Meredith or am I going to just let this friendship go? You don't have a friendship with Meredith. You hate Meredith and Meredith hates you. Okay.

Yes. But you should stop chasing her because it's annoying. You're like a little dog running after a school bus every day. Eventually the dog's going to get hit. Eventually the dog is going to catch a school bus. Okay. And then the dog is going to be dragged down the road and everybody's going to be like, "That damn dog was chasing the wrong bus." A wise woman once said, "Don't go chasing waterfalls. Stick to the bottles of orange dye that you're used to. And I think you have to follow that.

Stick to the timu you're used to. Stick to stick to the Alibaba orders that you're used to, please. Okay.

You're going after Niagara Falls right now. And you're in a little barrel. And guess what? You're on the top part of the falls. So then, uh, now they all head out and Lisa is like, "Have you guys ever read this the the secret language of trees? Oh my gosh, it's the most beautiful thing, guys. I love to read and I love to have like be barefoot on the ground and like when we build a ha house like we have an area just for like grounding so it can be in the ground and then I take all my like Wendy's rappers and I bury them in the ground. I'm like here trees here's food for you trees and they tell me thank you so much I love trees.

Yeah, I'm obsessed with trees. We have like beautiful trees in front of our house. Like I literally talk to the trees. I'm like it's okay if you tap me on the shoulder. It's okay. Yes, this is Chanel. It is. I knew Chanel. I know Chanel. Yeah. Yeah. Put Chanel belts on all the trees cuz whenever I walk home, all the trees are like, "You look amazing. Where do I get that outfit?" And I'll be like, "Here, you can be just like me." And then they have Chanel belts on. It's amazing. Yeah. I love Trey. I love Aspens. Aspens are my favorite Trey. Yeah. Like um it's like what what are what trees are talking to Lisa Barlo like amongst themselves or to her like oh that sorry that was a line but like trees are magic. I love them. They have personalities. My goal weight is a tree.

Yeah they also by the way like we have beautiful trees in the front house. We don't have any of those ugly trees. Any of those stupid ugly trees? Ew. Go away. What are you doing hanging out with Angie Harrington? Gross. I will literally talk to the trees. I'll be like how are you? Can I touch? Can I touch? And I'll tell them it's like okay to tap me on the shoulder. Okay, here's the secret, guys. My team of seven lawyers, they're just trees, but they're so good at what they do. Lisa, if the trees wanted to talk to each other, they wouldn't be able to get a word in if you were in the forest with them. Like, oh my gosh, you guys talk to each other. I love that. What are we talking about? Are you an aspen? I love aspen. That's my favorite tree. It's like what trees are talking to Lisa Barlo?

Oh, I just I just we need we need to have a referendum on the Heather gayism. It's just too much. It's too much.

Like they're going to close Branson, Missouri because of Heather. It's like, okay, you know what? The It's over. It's all over. Start opening. She's going to start opening for Joe Gorga and in Atlantic City soon. Okay, it's

She's amazing. Am I right? It just, you know what it is? It just speaks as someone who's like too aware, too self-aware of like the show and is is too concerned with the production of it all. She's always been she's always made jokes like you mentioned. She's always made jokes in the in the confessional. It's been fine. But like now she's starting to believe like, "Guys, I'm here to save the episode. Here comes my funny moment." It's like it's too much. Okay, so Lisa's like, "Brittney, I wanted to ask you like, would you like throw up every day when we were in Cananan? Were you like throwing up?" And Britney's [clears throat] like, "Um, well, didn't we all sort of get sick when the boat sort of went like this?" Yeah, but yours wasn't from alcohol. Which, by the way, you know what this is all about? This is a giant revenge from last year when Britney said she heard Merida throwing up. And now Meredith and Lisa are like,

"We got her. We got We found out she threw up." It's just It's so stupid, Lisa. It's It's like not subtle at all, you know? There's zero subtlety. By the way, okay, I just finished my tree segment. Okay. Yeah. I wanted to ask you, do you throw up every day in Canadawan? Like, what is that? Where did that come from? Are

you a thrower? And he's [clears throat] like, well, no. I mean, I guess I started getting motion sickness and Oh, yeah. So, it wasn't from the alcohol. It wasn't from like drinking in your room, going in like the bathroom and like tipping the bottle. Was it more than what I saw? Do you have like a crazy problem? Do you like Nicholas Cage? Do you want to go to Vegas and then leave there? What's going on?

That girl from the babysitter's club will take care of you. Don't worry about it. Just don't prioritize men over her. Okay.

She has a huge shoe collection. That's for her. It's in her name. [gasps] What is Lisa even talking about? I mean, if Lisa had a problem with this, then wouldn't she have brought this up on the yacht? I mean, I think they did because they were giving you [ __ ] when you were barfing and still taking shots. So, this is weird that they're acting like no one ever talked to Britney about it, but it's also weird that they brought it up. I mean, Britney being an alcoholic on a boat doesn't make Meredith less of an alcoholic, you know, in fights. So, it just seems like an odd.

They're probably winding up, in addition to having revenge from last year, they're also probably winding up to a moment of, see, it's not nice when people make allegations about you based off of scant evidence or hearsay, right? So, we shouldn't do this. Like it's definitely like a aha. See see what it's like to walk a mile in my very high tall heels. So Britney's like, "Well, you're trying to stir something up, Lisa Barlo." No, Britney, you're like a little lush. I heard that you were drinking and like throwing up and like drinking and then like throwing up and then like you took a glass of wine and you put like the wine in the glass and you drank it and then afterwards you're like, "Uh-oh, throw up time. Alcoholic.

Hey, guess what? Do you want to go to the bathroom at this restaurant? It's downstairs. She'll have to take 12 steps. Heather's like, "Sounds like a girl's trip to me." Yeah. Heather. Uh, so Lisa's like, "So yeah, are you an alcoholic?" Cuz yeah, I heard you were drunk the whole entire boat ride like you would throw up and they start drinking again. Who did you hear that from? A tree. A tree told me I love trays. The trees have eyes.

Yeah. So um Britain. So then then we see flashback to uh the Meredith said it in the bath. Basically Meredith is like, "Well, Lisa, what I heard was that Britney was throwing up on the yacht," which is also like throwing up a yacht. It's pretty standard. Angie actually spent a whole day doing that. So Britney is like, she's like, "Oh gosh, but who said it? I don't know who said it. Someone said it. I don't know. Maybe it was like Histas, Greek goddess of Fistas." And Britney's like, "Well, everyone saw me do this." It's like no one had a problem with it then other than Meredith. So who's talking about me now? Like who's making this a thing?

Like I want to know. And honestly like thank you so much. Like it's such an honor to be like the focus of an argument again.

And then they just keep cutting to Bronwin like making this face like oh god not me. No mhm. And

you know I literally hurt my neck just now doing the Bronin nod. This like now my neck hurts. Like now I'm going to have to get a massage or go to a chiropractor. Like I literally my neck doing the brain. So, they go to dinner and um Mary's like, "Oh my god, why why are there more stairs? Why are there stairs literally everywhere here?" Which is kind of how I felt about a lot of Europe. I mean, Italy especially. I was like, "Is this whole country calling me a flat ass?" Like, Jesus, I get it. Okay. You want me to climb some stairs?

So, they go to dinner and um Heather is like, "Wow." They're looking at the menu and Heather and and Lisa goes, "Oh my god, they have bara. I love bara." And Heather goes, "But it's buffalo." Like, "What is buffalo bara?" She's like, "Oh my god, I don't know. Is it from a buffalo?" She goes, "Oh my god, no. I'm not going to eat that, but is it from a buffalo? How can you love barata and you've never heard of buffalo? How do you not heard of buffalo mozzarella?" Now admittedly, it took me a very long time in my life to finally look it up to be because I just sort of accepted it was called buffalo mozzarella, but I never questioned why it was called that. And then one day I was like, why is it called that? Is it like [clears throat] from a it's not really from a buffalo, is it? And it's like, well, it's from a water buffalo, right? Like I don't know.

You know what? I don't even know. I don't care. The point is they all have phones. They could look it up and I don't know why they're not looking it up.

So is having a moment. Yeah, her. She knows it's Todd because um the ringer is like, "Hello, Todd. Todd, what's up? Is everything okay? Is everything okay, Todd? Todd, what's happening?" And we find out that it's her mom's last weekend in the house because they've sold it. So Todd flew out last minute to swoop in and help get it done. Mhm. And he's keeping me up to date. Mhm. And I think it's just it's wearing on both of them. So I feel incredibly guilty. incredibly guilty that it's not me who's there. I mean, God, finally, I could have been the one to kick my mother out of the house and I didn't get the chance. I just feel so terrible that my mom has to understand what it feels like to need your family at a desperate time in your life and they just abandon you.

So, God, I feel so terrible that that has to happen for her. I just wanted to be able to put her last box in the U-Haul and say, "Well, you shouldn't have got knocked up then, mother." Okay, goodbye. Well, I did send her an N95 mask so that way when Todd starts to fart, she's protected. But, um, anyway, good luck to you, Mom. [gasps]

Thankfully, he probably won't be farting because he won't be making out with her. So it's big trigger for him.

So, um, Brahma's on the phone and she's basically she's basically like wrapping up and she's, you know, talking about this whole thing and, uh, she's like she feels really bad about it. So, she comes back to the table and Whitney's like, "Is everything okay? How are you an alcoholic now? Was that your dealer? Was that your supplier? She's got a problem. I see the signs."

Was Todd upset because he he thought Meredith is having alcoholic problems? Alcoholic. So, Brahman was like, "No, Todd just texted me." He was like, "Uh, can you call me?" Uh, and and so but because he was sick and tired of texting like, "Oh, is that what that was? We thought you had gas because it turns out Todd's text town is every time it comes in." So Lisa's like, "What did he say about it?" Well, it's just a lie. It's just It's just a lie. But is your mom doing any better? Well, I think yesterday was really hard. It was Mother's Day and none of her kids were there and I think felt intense. I'm just trying to say that like what my mom went through is probably a lot worse than what Meredith went through or what Britney went through. So, if you guys want to cry about it, maybe you should send some tears to Muzzy because she had the worst situation of all because she was also got no calls and was packing up

a house that she grew up in. So, thank you. So, uh they all get these shots and are drinking the shots and uh is are these the ones where they're having to taste them with their tongues? The really strong shots like Yeah.

And Mary Mary couldn't Mary couldn't take it. So, um, Britney's like, "Wait, Lisa, I still want to know where the whole alcoholic thing came from." Like, please tell me. I mean, who was talking about me like I'm an alcoholic. Well, you know what? I just heard that you threw up more than once. I just heard that. But who though? Okay. Well, I heard it and I told it to Luca. There. There. I I heard it. But who who did you hear it from? And Meredith just shrugs. Just Well, I heard it through the grape vine. I was eating some cereal and some raisins started dancing around and told me about it.

The reason on the saxophone is very talented, but they said we were missing our brothers cuz someone stole them off the grape vine, turned us into wine, and put us into Britney's stomach. So Britney's like, "Well, who's the mysterious birdie? My roommate." And Mary's like, "Why do we have to talk about throw up?" Well, I'm not outing anyone who said anything cuz I have morals on my threads of you in this group. But America, Bronwin told me that she was roommates with Britney and that she spent the entire time drinking to the point of vomiting and then started drinking again.

And so then Bronwin is telling us, she's like, "Well, I'm not going to take credit for saying that." Mm-m. Because that is not what I said. Mhm. Okay. What actually happened is Meredith came to me and said, "Was Britney throwing up on the boat? Did you see this?" And I said, "Of course I saw it. We roommed together. We shared a bathroom and I saw her throwing up." I mean, there was no insinuation that she was drunk or that she was drinking and throwing up. And Meredith said, "I've seen her drinking and throwing up and all I said was we shared a bathroom and of course I saw her throwing up." Okay, so you did so you did say it. And who cares? She was doing it. So,

right. Who cares? Britney's saying that M is such a hypocrite because she's like, you know, she's not speaking to Whitney for weeks for accusing her of being an alcoholic pill popper, and now she thinks it's okay to do that to me. I'm like, "No, the point is you're supposed to realize how you're not supposed to say, "Wow, she's a hypocrite." You're supposed to say, "Oh, I see why this can be hurtful that someone can take circumstantial evidence and turn it against you and make damning accusations." You're supposed to have some self-reflection,

right? I think the point is is that you guys are being hypocrites by by acting like this is a big deal, that someone is saying you're an alcoholic, right?

So Heather's like, "Well, does anyone at the table think that she has a drinking problem?" Hold on. I just peed myself. I did. I did have one too many. Okay. Okay. But anyway, does anyone think that Britney has a drinking problem? Raise your hand. I'm just raising my hand as an example. Oh, the waiter's raising his hand. Hi. I might have I might have had sex with him. Maybe. I'm not saying I did.

All I'm saying is it just sounds pretty judgy to say lush Alie, you know. Okay, but let's not joke about that cuz it's a serious accusation.

Okay, wait. I outed Lush. I I outed Alie over there. Alkey. Alkey. Alkey. Cuz you're pounding drinks and then throwing up and then pounding again. And that's probably not great. I can do it, too. This is really fun. Alie, pounding? There was no pounding of drinks. I can't even pound drinks. But Lisa, why are you saying that about Britney? We can't call Meredith an alcoholic, but we can call you an alcoholic. Why is that fair? But you did call her an alcoholic, and then you just had a whole lunch where you insinuated that she was an alcoholic. So, are you not seeing the point here? Now, do I think that Lisa's making this point in a good way? No. This is not the landing.

She's not sticking the landing, nor is she sticking the takeoff either. She's just like this is just like a a real messy awkward thing, but like it's in the messiness where Lisa Lisa is Lisa is the queen of clunkiness. And it's just so great seeing her do her craft.

Yeah. She's just clunking on and she's like, "Nobody called her an alcoholic." And it pops up on screen. Flashback to 16 seconds earlier. Lisa calling Britney and Alie.

But you just But just because you said Alie doesn't make a cute aliyakamus. I'm talking to you. I didn't say she was. I didn't point her and say alcoholic pill popper. Remember? She's like, "Yeah, but you said alcoholic lush." Well, I added alky lush in to make it less serious. We have to imagine like it was pretty cool. Like all the trees are laughing right now. Yeah. Sorry. I was just trying to make it more fun. Stop. That's not less serious. When I said that to Meredith, you anniiliated me. And that was a double standard.

Don't do that. That's not cute. I'm standing up for people being called alcoholics.

I love the double standard on alcoholic accusations. When I call someone an alcoholic in a pill popper, it's bad. But when you do it, somehow it's okay. So, [clears throat] uh, Brahman's like, "Okay, well, um, say sorry. Say sorry to her and let's move on. Say sorry." No, I'm not sorry. I'm sorry. I don't think you're an alcoholic. Okay, there. So, Angie's like, "Okay, moving on from booze and boys. What about like you're successful, you're interesting, right?" Then Heather's like, "Well, your acting history is pretty successful. I mean, you were on the mistletoes, which is pretty cool. You have you have an IMD because she's talking to Britney. She's like, you know, you're you you you have a very good acting resume. You're not lying about it at all. You've accomplished lots of things. You've probably accomplished more than any of us here."

Wait a minute. Wait a minute. And Braum was like, "What? Can I ask you what you just said? You said Britney's a great actress, and that's nice. I mean, you're standing up for her." And then the last thing you said was, I mean, frankly, Britney is more accomplished than a lot of people at this table, which I mean, I don't know. I don't know if you've heard, but I was a secretary in the financial district at one time. So, I would talk about it, but the case is sealed. The case is sealed. But how dare you? How dare you? How dare you say that she's more accomplished. I have a brand that is so failed that I've made it a story line.

That's makeup that I have moisturizer that I can't use because of a brand deal with my husband and jewelry I bought off Alibaba and never spoke about again. How dare you? I I have prison and because of my situation, I've had to revise it. That's why Justin and I are saying that right now we are focused on prison reform.

Why would you say that one of us is more accomplished than the other? Well, yeah. I mean, well, how many of us have been in five or six holiday movies that nobody ever wants to watch? And Lisa's like, I've sold three businesses. I'm not Blake Lively. I'm very smart. I set up a high top in a bar once. Okay, that's a lot of accomplishment.

I'm just saying she has accolades. Well, I have design awards and all kinds of other things. Uh, I don't know if you've seen, but on my refrigerator, there's an award for best mom that was written on a paper plate by my toddler. So, I think we know who's the most accomplished here.

And Mary goes, "One at a time." Okay. So, Whitney's like, "I don't even know how we're defining success, but it's comical that the thought of Britney having more than them drives them crazy."

That's fair. That's a fair point. It is kind of hilarious cuz normally you would say, you know what, why don't we take a moment to talk about our accomplishments cuz we're all accomplished and we all come at each other and why don't we talk about all the wonder why don't why don't we praise everyone for their accomplishments but instead it's like no no okay Britney was in oh she was in Little Mermaid in Japan once. Well guess what I sold jewelry. Okay. It's so weird and it's so weird that Brunwin is the one who gets so upset. It's like how dare you. How dare you talk about Britney's accomplishments like that? What are you so upset about?

I made my living room look like Beetlejuice. Last year, I gave a lot of money to a charity on Instagram that said that I never gave them that money. So, I don't know what you guys are talking about.

I I sourced I sourced a a mug from Cincinnati for Todd. That's quite the accomplishment. [clears throat]

Well, I'm not saying anything other than that she's not just some lonely house mouse that doesn't have anything on her resume. Well, I was called dumb today, so there was that. And then we see a flashback to six hours earlier and Angie going, "You are delusional. It's like the lights are on, but nobody's home." And Britney's like, "Wait, the lights the lights are on at home. You don't even know what it means. That's how much they're not on. The the lights are not on. This is not a brink." I loved that because also the way Angie said because when when Britney was confused by the saying when Angie the way Angie was Angie was just like, "Wow, you're dumber than I thought." Like her vibe was like, "Wow, you don't even No, that's that's how much they're not on." Like that's how that's how off they are.

Like you don't even have solar patio lights that come on by themselves, you know? It's she's like, "Wow,

you were off the grit." And Britney's like, "Wow, you're really going low, Angie. You're really going low now. You're talking about electricity bills." And she goes, "You're calling me stupid." And Angie just nods and smiles like, "Yes. Yes, I am." This is someone who crashed into a tray this morning. Yes, I am calling you stupid. Um, Heather's like, "Well, everyone here loves to pile on to Britney, and the truth is she doesn't."

Oh, okay. Okay. So, you're her mouthpiece. So, you're her mouthpiece now. You think I'm her mouthpiece? Just because I'm a New York Times bestselling author three times in a row, that makes me suddenly a mouthpiece.

I'm not trying to be. I just don't want to fight you guys over Britney. Well, you do. You seem to go real hard, Mary. Mary is annoyed for no reason again. And Heather's like, "Well, I just don't like the pylons on Britney. I mean, it's the lowest common denominator. She doesn't even know how to turn her lights on in her house. I mean, she's trying to be a good sport." and the bullies are just stealing her lunch money. And Britney's like, "Well, thank heaven somebody comes to my rescue." Well, why don't you come to your own rescue? At some point, she's got to stand up for herself, says Mary. And and Angie's like, "Wait, Heather, we're go we're asking Lisa to step back and allow Meredith to communicate with and find her voice with friends. And there's times, Meredith, where you're really hurt, but you haven't been able to say that this is how you're making me feel."

And you've got Lisa trying to tell people how you feel, and it's not the same. So Heather, you're trying to tell everyone how Britney feels, and you need to allow Britney to find her voice in her own group. What I'm trying to say is let her respond on her own so we can make fun of her some more because it'll be hilarious. So let her figure it out with Meredith and let Meredith figure it out with everyone else without Lisa stepping in, which I think is not a terrible point, but they're being they are always really mean to Britney. Now, is it funny? Yes.

Do I love it? I do. But they are really mean to Britney. and Lisa coming for Britney for no reason at this lunch is not cool. So, I feel like it's important to get that in, but also say thank you because I really loved it. Whitney's like,

"Yeah, I have a lot of emotions about this." Yeah. Whitney's like, "No, I think there's a big difference between what Heather does for Britney and the other dog versus what Lisa does for Meredith because I don't like Meredith and that's different." And Lisa's like, "Wait a minute." No, because I haven't even said what the [ __ ] it is yet. Shut the [ __ ] up and let me talk. And then she gets fingers in her face. And she's And Lisa is like, "No, you shut the [ __ ] up. Don't you talk to me like that again. Don't talk to me like that again or a Mexican el just going to grab your neck and it's and it's branches and it's going to strangle you. I've got I've got friends in high places, literally redwoods." So then Lisa, they're they're talking and then Lisa knocks over her wine and spills. [gasps] Oh my god, that was an accident. That was not part of the fight. It's fine.

It's out of bounds. Don't worry. Time out. Time out. Let's clean it up. It's fine. I'll buy you a new one. Okay. Well, you know what? Hold my hand cuz it's the only way. Just give me 7 seconds, Lisa Barlo. 7 seconds for the sisterhood. 7 seconds to tell you about my three books that I've written. No, I just like I just don't like you guys telling me what to do and what not to do. I don't like it. Okay. If I want to stand up for her, I will stand up for her.

I didn't even say anything yet. and you're assuming what I'm going to [ __ ] say. When he's like standing and screaming and having a fit, the waiter comes over and he's like, "Ladies, excuse me. Unfortunately, the restaurant will be now be closed." And they just ignore him. And he's like, "Okay, well, I would like to toast to Greece. Um, so five more minutes. Five more minutes. Five more Greek restaurants closed. Restaurants."

No. No. Five more minutes. Hey, this is my country, sir. This is my country sir.

Oh my god. I was so embarrassed. No, please don't. I'll bet she does this at Epcot Center. She's like, "This is my country. This is Florida, man. Get the [ __ ] out of here."

A lot of people were angry at Angie Kay about this because they felt like it was kind of a Karen moment for her. My interpretation of it was that her was her saying like, "No, no, I know we all look we look like loud, annoying, awful Americans, but I'm actually Greek. It's okay." I think she was trying to be like, "It's cool. I'm cool. I'm one of you." Um, that was my interpretation of it. Maybe I'm just an Angie K apologist, and I'm okay with that, too. But um I I just chuckled. I was not I just put my head in my hands like, "Oh no, Auntie, what are you doing? What are you doing?

This is not your country." Oh, I'm so Even if it is your country. Who says that? Like if you're in Chile's getting a fight with someone and they're like, "You cannot fight in this bar. Um excuse me. This is my country." Okay.

Yeah. It's less appealing when you when you put that accent on it. Um when uh Yeah. So the waiter's like, you know, I'm sorry, but this restaurant is closed, my lady. You know that no, you know, there's no one else getting up from any other tables in this restaurant. And and they just I have to say it's they all start to laugh because they realize, oh, whoops. We took our community theater scene a little bit too far.

Yeah. It's like second place we're getting asked to leave today. So like this [clears throat] is embarrassing. First we get kicked out of the spa and now we get kicked out of a restaurant. I mean, Greeks party until the sun comes up and now we're getting kicked out of a restaurant. That is bad. That is bad. It's bad. And he goes, "Please don't forget your stuff because I don't want you to come back to find it. We want the most places that we ever agreed to have this show here. Please leave. Please. I've never been kicked out of a Greek restaurant in my life.

That was so embarrassing." He's like, "Oh, go." So, they all leave and then he then you see the waiter cleaning up and he tells like the bartender in Greek, "Thank God that they left. classic classic ridiculousness.

This would be the time when I'd normally say, "Well," and then after that, they said it's the season finale, which means we only have one episode left, which makes me so sad. But guess what? It already aired. And our recap of the season finale will be showing up in your feeds very shortly. But first, we have to record it. And that's what we're going to do right now. So, thanks everyone for being here for this catchup episode. We appreciate you. We love you. Get your tickets on Friday for the crappies. And guess what? We'll be giving you another reminder on the next episode. I guarantee it. So,

and everyone until February 27th. We sure love you guys. We'll talk to you next time.

Bye.

Questions about this episode

Who speaks in "RHOSLC S615: You Can Grape Leaves!"?

Ronnie Karam (Host), Ben Mandelker (Host), Angie (Host), Meredith (Guest), Lisa (Guest), Britney (Guest), Bronwin (Guest).

What is "RHOSLC S615: You Can Grape Leaves!" about?

The main topic highlights the excitement surrounding the upcoming Golden Krappies event, set for February 27th in Los Angeles, with tickets becoming available soon and a pre-sale option for Patreon members. Additionally, the hosts express their enthusiasm for the current awards season, including attending the Golden Globe nominations announcement.

What is mentioned in this Watch What Crappens episode?

3 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including Chanel, Golden Krappies, The Secret Language of Trees. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "RHOSLC S615: You Can Grape Leaves!"?

The episode runs 1 h 10 min; the transcript is about 14,127 words in 175 timestamped sections.

More from Watch What Crappens

About this transcript: the episode's spoken words as captioned on YouTube, split into timestamped sections. Reclip.Me locates every person, work and idea in the text, keeps the time it is first named, and quotes the words around it verbatim. Last updated January 24, 2026.