Transcript

Schwimmer's Legs, Mel Robbins, Tiger Comb | Fact Check for Mel Robbins

From Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard · Episode page · Watch on YouTube

· 46 min · 8,856 words · 299 timestamped sections

This is the full, timestamped transcript of "Schwimmer's Legs, Mel Robbins, Tiger Comb | Fact Check for Mel Robbins", an episode of Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard published November 12, 2025 (46 min, about 8,856 words). It mentions 56 people, works and ideas, including Michigan, Santa Monica, Moskegan, Friends, Killington.

What is discussed, and when

  1. – 5:00: Dcastro, Herium, Kristen, Permium
  2. – 10:00: Black Mirror, Friends, Harry Potter, Larry Trilling
  3. – 20:00: Baby Mama, Santa Monica, Santa Monica
  4. – 25:00: Marina del Rey, Santa Monica
  5. – 30:00: Lola V
  6. – 35:00: Allenon, Friends
  7. – 40:00: Michigan, Denali, Killington, Mount Arvon
  8. – 45:00: Moskegan, A Brief History of Intelligence, Jim Baker, Michigan
  9. – 46:11: Rob Holl, Santa Monica

Notable quotes from "Schwimmer's Legs, Mel Robbins, Tiger Comb | Fact Check for Mel Robbins"

  • Hi there. This is Herium and Permium. If you like that, you're going to love the fact check with Miss Monica.
    about Santa Monica · at
  • And you know it was hot as Hades and I had been filming a bunch and then Dcastro had to get into my leather.
    about Dcastro · at
  • Was it exciting to see Schwimmer's legs?
    about Schwimmer · at
  • Exactly. This is a black mirror.
    about Black Mirror · at
  • Yeah. I think if you removed me watching either Friends or Goodwill Hunting, if you remove both of those, I disappear.
    about Friends · at
  • Okay. Mel, so you said that the closest like high peak to Michigan is Killington, another place I've been in like Okay, what do we count as like high peak?
    about Michigan · at
  • So, okay. I just looked up all 50 state high points in the US and how to visit them. Okay. Alaska has Denali.
    about Denali · at
  • Tammy Fay Baker. Was she from Moskegan? Is that what you say? How do you say Moskegan? Okay. No.
    about Moskegan · at

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

People

  • Santa Monica — Person · 4 mentions · first at
  • Herium — Person · 1 mention · first at
    Hi there. This is Herium and Permium. If you like that, you're going to love the fact check with Miss Monica.
  • Permium — Person · 1 mention · first at
    Hi there. This is Herium and Permium. If you like that, you're going to love the fact check with Miss Monica.
  • Kristen — Person · 1 mention · first at
    But so they were arrived at Anna's house, so she brought them today. But I was wearing other shoes, but Kristen is going to wear them to her thing.
  • Dcastro — Person · 1 mention · first at
  • Schwimmer — Person · 1 mention · first at
  • Lisa Kudro — Person · 1 mention · first at
    And then what happens like what happens to the interview we did with Jennifer Anderson and Lisa Kudro. Like they don't get erased. They still exist on their own in our reality.
  • Phoebe — Person · 1 mention · first at
    Yeah. By a mob, but not really. Just one Phoebe.
  • Larry Trilling — Person · 1 mention · first at
    It wouldn't. You know Larry Trilling is on I guess what would be this week's episode of Mom's Caru. And Larry Trillian is really well he has impeccable taste and so he's made lists.
  • Tammy Fay Baker — Person · 1 mention · first at
    Tammy Fay Baker. Was she from Moskegan? Is that what you say? How do you say Moskegan? Okay. No.
  • Jim Baker — Person · 1 mention · first at
  • Rob Holl — Person · 1 mention · first at
    Unless they're Dak Shepard or Monica Padman, Rob Holl, but even Holl is problematic.
  • Bessel van der Kolk — Person · 1 mention
  • Jessica Chastain — Person · 1 mention
  • Joey Bishop — Person · 1 mention
  • Mindy — Person · 1 mention

Books & papers

  • The Jinx — Book · 1 mention · first at
    Unexpected from what I little I know about the archetype of Phoebe. I would erase the jinx and then rewatch it.
  • Harry Potter — Book · 1 mention · first at
  • Raising Arizona — Book · 1 mention · first at
    Conversation with Larry that even for me as hard as it is to imagine that if I saw Raising Arizona for the first time in my 50s Yeah.
  • Baby Mama — Book · 1 mention · first at
    When I'm in New York City, I think, well, I was single once in New York City while doing Baby Mama and it was so fun cuz you just meet so many people walking around and it's so social and I would be you were excited to [ __ ].
  • The Body Keeps the Score — Book · 1 mention · first at
    Who wrote The Body Keeps the Score?
  • A Brief History of Intelligence — Book · 1 mention · first at
    That's hard. I did. You brought up a brief history of intelligence.
  • Sixth Sense — Book · 1 mention

Companies & orgs

  • Friends — Company · 2 mentions · first at
  • Black Mirror — Company · 1 mention · first at
  • Mom's Caru — Company · 1 mention · first at
    It wouldn't. You know Larry Trilling is on I guess what would be this week's episode of Mom's Caru. And Larry Trillian is really well he has impeccable taste and so he's made…
  • Allenon — Company · 1 mention · first at
    I think it's common, which is why I'm saying it. And I think it's important to monitor. and she brought up the Allenon phrase, give for free and for fun and I was like yeah that's like you got to remember that and it's important.
  • Maru — Company · 1 mention

Products & tech

  • Lola V — Product · 1 mention · first at
    Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I It's probably Lola V.

Concepts & topics

  • morning larks — Concept · 1 mention · first at
    There are six human chronotypes, not just morning larks and night owls. Oh, there's more.
  • night owls — Concept · 1 mention · first at
    There are six human chronotypes, not just morning larks and night owls. Oh, there's more.
  • Chronotype — Concept · 1 mention

Places & events

  • Michigan — Place · 6 mentions · first at
  • Moskegan — Place · 3 mentions · first at
  • Killington — Place · 2 mentions · first at
    Okay. Mel, so you said that the closest like high peak to Michigan is Killington, another place I've been in like Okay, what do we count as like high peak?
  • Mount Arvon — Place · 2 mentions · first at
    Because when you Google it, like high closest high mountain peak to Michigan, it says Mount Arvon.
  • Denali — Place · 2 mentions · first at
  • Santa Monica — Place · 1 mention · first at
    They don't. It's not like they live in Santa Monica, which that's a longdistance relationship. Oh, okay. Exactly. And this was even this is further than that.
  • Marina del Rey — Place · 1 mention · first at
    And then you guys would be on a date in Marina del Rey eating seafood.
  • Sierra Nevada — Place · 1 mention · first at
    In the southern Sierra Nevada Crest.
  • Mount Whitney — Place · 1 mention · first at
  • Mount Elbert — Place · 1 mention · first at
    Okay. Colorado has Mount Elbert.
  • Death Valley — Place · 1 mention · first at
    We got the lowest point in the in America in Death Valley.
  • Mount Hood — Place · 1 mention · first at
  • New Hampshire — Place · 1 mention · first at
    Really embarrassing. Wait. Closest to Michigan. Okay. North is New Hampshire closed. Nope.
  • Mount Washington — Place · 1 mention · first at
  • Niagara — Place · 1 mention · first at
    You go through Canada. We would go up through Canada, then down Niagara, and then over. We wouldn't go through Pennsylvania and New York up. Yeah.
  • Pennsylvania — Place · 1 mention · first at
    Through Canada, then down Niagara, and then over. We wouldn't go through Pennsylvania and New York up. Yeah.
  • Stone Mountain — Place · 1 mention · first at
    What's your highest? Stone Mountain.
  • Brass Town Bald — Place · 1 mention · first at
  • Blue Ridge — Place · 1 mention · first at
    Well, probably in the northeast getting into the Blue Ridge. 4,784 feet.
  • Minnesota — Place · 1 mention · first at
  • Duth — Place · 1 mention
  • LP — Place · 1 mention
  • Mount Rainier — Place · 1 mention
  • UP — Place · 1 mention

Full transcript with timestamps

Hi there. This is Herium and Permium. If you like that, you're going to love the fact check with Miss Monica.

Where did those shoes come from? I ordered these. Anna and I ordered these. Well, she got black ones.

Okay. But um so they were arrived at Anna's house, so she brought them today. But I was wearing other shoes, but Kristen is going to wear them to her thing.

She's going She's going to wear the shoes you were just in. Yeah. Oh my god. Got a midday shoe swap

just happened. It just happened. Now, that's an interesting proposition because you're putting on shoes that are warm with someone else's foot warmth.

Cool. Do you think they were damp at all? Did you sweat in them at all? I I was wearing socks.

Oh, okay. Then that's not going to be an issue. But it still might be. I don't think so.

She loves my sweat. I doubt you're sweating through your socks and getting the shoe damp. Do you think?

I doubt too because guess what? But I still pop off your shoe. No, now this I took my socks off for these.

How come? Um I don't know. Oh, okay. Interesting. I just decided to because um these are smaller.

Okay. So, like the other shoes are which is why they fit her. They're a little bit a tiny bit big on me. So, a sock is nice. It fills it out.

Surely. She didn't wear a sock. She went raw dog. Yeah. On the warm damp loafer. Yeah.

What a gangster. My sweat is great. But would How would you feel about putting on a warm damp shirt?

If it was hers, I'd be fine. Well, that reminds me that um this was so unfortunate. We were shooting to get Chips green lit. We made like a self- financed five minute kind of trailer for it.

Like sizzle a sizzle reel. So, no permits out in the middle of uh Angela's forest. And we only had one set of leathers between us. Or the leathers had to match. Whatever the case was.

Leathers. Tell people what leathers are. Full leathers that you would ride ride in at the racetrack.

It's the suit that motorcyclists wear. Yeah. It's like from chin down to your ankles. Yeah.

And um you know it was hot as Hades and I had been filming a bunch and then Dcastro had to get into my leather.

That's tough. I mean that might be the hardest core thing I've ever seen anyone do is get into wet leathers. Yeah, you don't want that. You want red leather, yellow leather. Red leather.

Red leather, yellow leather. Um, but yes, when I go to the track, it's always very, very hot. And in between sessions, when I pull that thing off, it is just like someone sprayed a hose in there. Yeah. It's about as sweaty as I've ever been is in that suit,

I bet. I mean, tight leather. Yeah. Yeah. What are you going to do? It's like Ross's pants. Some people will understand that.

He had loud pants, right? Do I know this? that he had these black leather pants

and they were squeaky and loud. Too tight, right? They were They got too tight and he he took them off to go to the bathroom and he couldn't get them back on and he was on a date.

Oh, why did he take them all the way off to go to the bathroom? I think he did it to air it was it was so tight and he had to air him air out.

Interesting motivation. And then he couldn't get him back on and he calls Joey and Joey tells asks if there's any like, you know, lotion or anything. Yep. And then he He tries and no, you know, it won't come on. And then he says Joey recommends that he make himself a pair of pace pants.

Pace pants. Well, I'm skipping some stuff. How did it resolve? It didn't. Spoiler. He had to come out holding his pants

in front of his privates and and um the date ended. Did you see any skin in that? Cuz in these sitcoms, you almost never see any skin.

I think he's wearing underwear. Was it exciting to see uh Schwimmer's legs? Gosh.

Schwmer's ear. You know what's funny is I don't remember that being exciting because the comedy was just so good.

It was so front and center that it inoculated you from PQ's. He was so good at physical comedy on that show. Didn't get that much uh didn't get much credit.

I think when I'm like terminal and I I uh announce I'll be in hospice, you know, and I've just got some months to, you know, be on drugs and lay in a bed. I I might consume the whole thing then. I might be saving it to the very end, which would that's maybe the best way to view it, like the last thing you saw before you died.

Yeah. Oh, okay. So, he's got a Thankfully, he's got a very long button-up shirt on, so it's covering and masking a lot of his private.

Yeah. And do you see the paste? I do. And I I go straight to the legs cuz I'm not The comedy isn't so present. Mind you, listener, Rob has put a picture up of the scene. Um Yeah. So, I go straight to the legs. But you do look at that and you go, "This something comedic's happening." Yeah.

Yeah, of course. And it was It was hilarious. Indeed. It was. This was a New Year's episode. Resolutions.

How much would you pay to be able to watch it all with a clean slate? Oh, great question.

Oh my god. 45 mil. 45 million. Okay. Yeah. What if there was a procedure? That's a That's a good That's a fun thought experiment. There's a procedure that can pinpoint a memory and erase it just so you can reconsume something. But I guess in doing that you would erase the wonderful Exactly.

feelings you had surrounding that. I would never be able to do that because the reason memories are impactful is because they're they're perfect storms.

Yeah. They're hitting you at the right time and right moment to be impactful. So if I erased it and then I started it again now

your whole personality collapsed if we remove those. Exactly. This is a black mirror.

Yeah. Interesting. And then what happens like what happens to the interview we did with Jennifer Anderson and Lisa Kudro. Like

they don't get erased. They they still exist on on their own in our reality. That's strange. Okay.

Yeah. And in fact when you would listen back and be like I don't even know that girl. I don't even know what that reference is about yourself. You're like, "What's she talking about when she said um you random?"

I wouldn't say she because it's still you be looking at you like me. But you had a couple You dropped a couple of references. One about Ross

running down the street or something. He was mobbed. He was mobbed. Mugged. Mugged. Mugged. Yeah. By a mob,

but not really. Just one Phoebe. By Phoei. Phoebe was a mugger in her youth. She had a tough childhood. Oh wow, that's unexpected from what I little I know about the archetype of Phoebe. I would erase the jinx and then rewatch it.

Ooh, but again, that was like so fun at a certain time. Well, that's what's interesting. Can you erase just the content and not the feeling of laying on the couch in the old house and watching it? Cuz I'd like to hold on to that, but just like I don't know what we're watching. I just remember it being fun.

It's too tricky. You have to It's you all or nothing. So in that case I there's nothing I would want to remove and start over.

Six sense maybe Harry Potter. There you go. Now I can I wish I could reread. Although like again I'm older now. Maybe it wouldn't have the same impact.

It wouldn't. You know um Larry Trilling is on I guess what would be this week's episode of Mom's Caru. And Larry Trillian is really um well he has impeccable taste and so he's made lists of movies. He made a hundred a list of a hundred movies that he thinks people should see.

Great. I want it. You should get Eric uh got it from him and he's been going through it with Lily and he's like this is the greatest list. Like everyone should have this list.

So when I was interviewing him I was like I wanted to talk about lists and and and I wanted to name like five of the best this and that. And um he he said, "Well, I have a very specific criteria for what I say makes. I'm not saying they're the best cinematic movies. I'm not saying they're historically this." But he had this criteria. It was really interesting. And he has a overarching theory that like you have a sweet spot between 15 and 22

where the movies you see in that period as you're like forming your identity are going to have a weight and a resonance that no other films will ever have.

Yeah. Um I mean, not for me. Mine goes a little bit younger, but still. But yeah, whatever that

maybe for boys, you guys are ahead of us a little bit and maybe you in particular were when did you have when did you get your uh menstrual cycle?

I'm trying to think of a tactful way to ask that. U there is a first arrival of the flies. Yeah.

Was um seven? No. Uh I was in seventh grade. So 12. So I was 12. Okay. Yeah. So I think that's on the earlier side. You do too. And what how what old were what old were you? What age were you when um uh

Goodwill Hunting? Goodwill Hunting came out? Uh 8th grade. So right on out. Oh yeah, you were Yeah, you were you were burbling.

Yeah, my hormones were Yes. books. Uh so one of his things is like what cultural relevance did it have? Like did it did it kind of take over culture in some way or um but just the seminal things what made me think of that. So yes, my my hunch is given my conversation with Larry that even for me as hard as it is to imagine that if I saw Raising Arizona for the first time in my 50s

Yeah. it's simply not going to be again I was in probably seventh grade when I saw Raising Arizona this world here.

Yeah. I think if you removed me watching either Friends or Goodwill Hunting, if you remove both of those, I disappear. I'm not a person anymore.

You got to You also got to consider the devil's advocate. Maybe you would be like the CEO of Snapchat. And

I'm already the CEO of a big company and I feel good about it. I guess there's a version where your life is better without it.

I don't think so. You don't think it might have set the bar so high with your boyfriends?

No, I don't. I think it taught me what I want. And also also for me, better. Better is an interesting word. I don't think there's a way my life could be better.

Oh, that's great. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, there are ways it could be different and equally good

or easier. Sure. Maybe. Yeah. Um, there are Yeah, there are different paths that are probably equally good.

Yeah. But I don't think my life could be better. No. Very, very I don't think mine could be better either. I was thinking of regrets the other day.

Mhm. And I generally don't have them. Yeah. And then I thought of I have a single regret.

Ooh, sure. And it's that I wish I could love I wish I could have loved my dad as much while he was alive as I do now.

And I wonder if that's a common regret for people who lose parents. I'm sure it is.

Like I've made a ton of mistakes and I've hurt people and I've done bad things and um they're not regrets

really. No, they're like um I am I'm sad they happened, but I feel like they had to happen. Like they had to happen. If I don't [ __ ] enough people over, I don't feel guilty enough and shame riddled enough to get sober, you know? Like if I if I just if I if I have an addiction that has no wreckage, then somehow I don't end up sober. And I and I could really evaluate my whole life that way. It's like if I don't make those mistakes, I don't end up

Yes, that's right. But there's nothing about not loving my dad while he was alive as much as I do now that took me in any direction I needed to be taken. Nor do I think it, you know, I I don't see any benefit whatsoever other than um I could have given him a lot more.

There's just no way to know. That's why regrets are problematic. Like there's no point in going down that road because you don't know. Also, like you did love him.

Oh, I did. I did. I did. Yeah. Maybe now it's it's that you it's just now that he's gone, you don't have the the hard

the the hard relationship part is over. Yeah. Yeah. And the hard part of him are over. The challenges are gone. So yeah, you're going to you're going to think you're going to think of him in a much different way. But when he's here and real, he's a real person with real issues.

That's 100% true. Obviously like your memory is is rosecoled in a in a very generous

kind way. Yeah. Um but I have realized things through being a parent. Mhm. That have changed what I think about them. I've just realized a lot of stuff that I know even that same person that it was challenging. I would have just um I feel like I'd have a lot more grace with and and understanding and less judgment. I don't think I I was so judgmental of him. Oh my god. Just shamefully judgmental of him.

Yeah. So I think the things that I've like learned over the last 12 years have changed dramatically. my overarching opinion of him.

Yeah. But you wouldn't have been able to have that without having kids probably.

Yeah. But that's the sadness. Like I think if he had lived long enough, I could have gotten to this point,

right? Well, then that's not a regret. That's a wish. That's a sadness. You wish he could have lived long enough for you.

Yeah. I guess I can't regret not learning a lesson that only having kids and time will teach you.

Yeah. Yes. Yeah. But it is regrettable, I guess. I understand. Yeah. Do you have any regrets?

Um, and I don't know if I believe in them. Like I have I have fleeting regret like you know things will come through my brain that I'm like I wish I didn't do that or I wish

you know whatever. But um but as a on a as a whole at this stage I don't think so because again everything informs who you are and I don't think I would be

the same person. Yes. If um life hadn't gone this way I hadn't made all these decisions and made all these mistakes and whatever. Yeah.

And I again I like my life. I I like who I am too. So I Yeah. Sorry, not sorry.

Sorry, not sorry. Not even sorry. Not sorry, not sorry. Um, Reese, speaking of Yeah.

Uh, regrets, I guess. Yes. Reese Witherspoon, for for those who have been asking how the challenge

Oh, she she gave me a challenge on air. Yeah. And I told her I would do it. Yeah. Yeah.

And then a lot of people have been texting and asking, uh, how's that going? Did you do it? Are you doing it? And I said, "Well, look, she didn't give me her phone number,

so I don't really have to do it." Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then, uhoh,

got a little text this morning and it was a check-in. It was like, "How we doing on the challenge?"

It was she remind people what was it one a month you had to do or just So, I kind of forget. I feel like it was a lot. It was like

It was three in the next month, I think. No, no, no. In the next three months, I think maybe.

I mean, I don't remember. Okay. But um we should probably get the rules if we're gonna try.

We probably do need the rules. She texted. She said uh she liked the episode, which was really lovely. Let's see what she says.

Yeah, let's find out. You know what I'm going to ask? Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah. I got

She's a taskmaster. She is. Yeah. It's very type A. She says, "Have you asked anyone out in the past few weeks?" #acountable.

Oh, no. I loved it. This is also what I love about her. Like, she's no nonsense. She is. She

going to get it done. She's going to get it done. And it it reminded me You're going to be married by Christmas. All thanks to Reese Witherspoon.

Literally, it reminded me of when we had Mindy on. I'd forgot about this. Okay.

We had Mindy on and Mindy said Ree cuz they worked together on that movie. Reese was like kind of the one that told Mindy like kind of [ __ ] get off the pot. My words, not neither of those with kids.

Oh, okay. Cuz Mindy was like, "Hey, I don't know." And Ree was kind of like it, do it now. Yeah,

do it. If you want to do it, you need to do it now. And she did. Pull the trigger and then she won't stop.

Reese is all these Indian girls fairy godmothers. Oh, wow. I didn't even realize the I I didn't put together the pattern.

Um, yeah. She is our white fairy godmother. Yeah. And making moves. Wow. She walks the walk.

It was in the next three months. I want you to ask out three different people. Okay.

There we go. So, I feel like I have some because I think I would have thrown a flag at three in one month. That's too ambitious.

But it's agree to that. You know, the odds of you just running into three strangers that you would want to go on a date with in a month. That's that's a high

that's too high. You would have to be will be the perfect place for that. Maru for me it would Maru is a good start for me. New York City. When I'm in New York, do you feel this way in New York City? When I'm in New York City, I think, well, I was single once in New York City

while doing Baby Mama and it was so fun cuz you just meet so many people walking around and it's so social

and I would be you were excited to [ __ ] Like I like [ __ ] Yeah. No, I know. But I'm just saying like I this is for meeting. This is for like

I still need to like the person I was going to No, you don't. Okay. In some cases, I didn't have to. But if I'm like going to meet someone socially and then chat all night and then end up in that position,

I'm not I'm not suffering through I'm not that type of degenerate Yeah. sex addict.

Sure. I'm like, you know, you're elevated sex addict. Um yeah, I need to I need to There needs to be some

personality spark happen. I just like I already I already feel like Oh, New York. I can't do New York because they live in New York. Oh yes. No, this was a hypothetical. Where do we think it would be easiest to meet three hot people in in a month,

right? I wouldn't even ask. I wouldn't even do this with them because like it's already a non-starter.

They live there. I know. But I said, okay, so I did tell her and this is true. There was a I did chat with someone very briefly at outside of a coffee shop, not Maru. Yeah.

Um and this was a someone who liked the show. Yeah. So, they were talking to me and they were cute and I thought like this person is cute.

Maybe this is the time I'm I know I'm supposed to do this. Is this the time? But then I add I don't know how we got to this, but this person doesn't live nearby.

You mean they just live in a different part of the city? No. Oh, okay. They don't. It's not like they live in Santa Monica,

which that's a longdistance relationship. Oh, okay. Exactly. And this was even this is further than that.

Okay. Um and I was like, "Oh, you know, no." So, I didn't do it. And I also did get kind of self-conscious cuz I was like talking, you know, I was like talking and asking questions and then he was like, "Well, I don't want to, you know, I don't want to take up your day." And I was like, "Oh my god." He's like annoyed I'm talking to him.

Are you kidding? That was his insecurity. I feel like he was like ready to be done talking.

Oh, you have this backwards. I think it was ready to be done talking. He's like, "Oh my god, she doesn't want to talk to me. I've already talked to her. She probably deals with this all the time. I'm going to relieve. I'm going to give her an out." What did you say?

I was like engaging. Yeah. So, what did you say after he said that? I said, "Oh, you know, no, it was it was really nice. It was nice to talk to you."

Okay. Say it to me. I'm you. You're him. Okay. Well, don't like have I don't want to take up your time or anything.

Hold on. Was that his delivery and he's looking at his phone? You think I don't think he was looking at his phone.

I kind of think this guy was a dick. You left that out. He wasn't a dick. Say it again. Say it again.

Okay. Uh I Yeah, I don't want to take up your time. You're not taking up my time.

I got to go, though. Oh, okay. So, I'm taking up your time. Then in that case, you should go.

Yeah. Yeah, that's Yeah, I won't say that. The last part or the part I said? The last part that you said.

But the part I said was what you needed to say. The first part was good. The second part was

cuz he that's because he he turned on me. I know he had turned and then I was like I No, he you had that one. You you misread that one.

I'm not sure. Okay. There's no again like regrets. There's no way to know. Okay. Well, hold on. Oh, this guy's out of the completely off out cuz if if he listens to the show, maybe he's hearing this.

I know. I hope not. Oh my god. He's probably so aroused right now. He's probably married. I didn't ask that part.

Okay. Um was he wearing You didn't look. I don't I do forget to look. Yeah, I never look either.

Yeah, I'm bad at looking at that rings. Um, yeah. Anyway, I just I think it's harder than people think.

I think it's harder than you think. I think it's harder than Ree thinks. I I did tell Ree I said, "Look, if you come across anyone,

okay, in their 30s, send them my number." And then I said, "Or older. I'm not confident. Stay tuned for more armchair expert if you dare.

No, you're very you're intermittently confident. I know it's confusing for everyone.

You're not going to take my advice, but I already know what the hack is for you.

What? It's so simple because I witness it all the time. The second you decide the person's not an option for you. Yeah.

You have unbridled confidence. Yeah. So, literally, you have a mental trick that you have to play to yourself, which is like you're chatting with that guy

and you just have to go like, "Oh, he's married and completely unavailable and then the side of you that is like bullishly confident would come out."

Okay. And then you guys would be on a date in Marina del Rey eating seafood. No. So, I think I was confident in that exchange

until until he didn't want to talk to me anymore. Then I was like, "Oh my god, this is so embarrassing."

I think he was being polite and insecure. Keep the logical part of your brain sift through that. He came up to you to chat.

No, we didn't come up. He just turned. Right. He engaged you. Yeah. Okay. You didn't engage him.

No, I didn't. He engaged you. And so do you think you can really mount an argument that you're so boring in 30 seconds that he went from wanting to engage you to like, "Oh god, get me out of this." That seems you would have to acknowledge it.

He wanted to say he was a fan, which he did did. Okay. And then he's like, "Mission accomplished."

Yeah. Cuz then I started, "Oh, what's your name?" I start engaging. So really, I did start engaging. He was just kind of like,

"Good job. I do that." Uhhuh. Uh-huh. He was just being polite though. What? He was just being polite

by saying that he didn't want to take your time. It's very obvious that's what happened.

You guys weren't there. Neither of you were there. No. But I don't believe and I think your logic could get you there. That someone engaged with you and tired of it in 20 seconds. As opposed to got insecure. Oh, I'm fanning out and this girl doesn't really want to talk and she's just being polite and I'm putting her in a bad position.

But he also kind of wasn't fanning out. like he was at f at first he was like oh Monica I love your show I love

I listened to a lot of episodes but he was also doing this kind of like he wasn't that interested

he's a playboy is he a playboy maybe anyway I guess I have three people I got to engage with this this it's really reminding me of Monica and Jess of course

obviously since that's the last time I got challenged like this yeah and it and it worked You did a bunch of stuff.

I did do more. I did do more. Anyhow, it's hard. It's hard. It's hard. Is it possible?

What? I feel like I'm like trying to um comb a tiger's hair right now. Like I want to comb this tiger's hair. This tiger has a knot in her hair and I want to comb it out.

I know. And I'm really afraid to get bit. You don't want to get bit tiger. I'm a nice tiger. Is it possible

that you're taking this too seriously? Taking what the the whole thing. Like it's not that big of a deal. Like you you you ask someone out, maybe it's good, maybe it's not. It's a two-hour dinner. Like it's all in all it's not a big deal. Like maybe just you have a little more lightness about it.

Um like it to me it feels like this heavy rock that's on your shoulder doing this thing as opposed to like it's not that big, you It's like you could have maybe a sense of humor about it and it could be lighter.

Uhoh. Uhoh. The t the claws are retract. Sometimes when you your comb is like Yeah. Well, so I got to get this gum. I got to get the gum out of your hair. You're pulling, you know, you're yanking.

I got to get the gum out. And it's not going to feel great the whole time. Yeah. And and guess what? Sometimes when you yank some tiger's hair, they're going to

they're going to get their claws out. Yeah. Okay. Now, what do you think of that? I think you have a point.

Okay. Um I do think you haven't been rejected in a long time. I don't think you've been rejected.

Yes, I have. In life, many times. Every time. Can you I almost have it. I almost have the gum. Just Can you tell me a time in the last 10 years that you asked someone out and they said, "No, thank you."

Yes. But they have had a girlfriend. Okay. That does that doesn't count. I didn't

That doesn't count. Um No, but I've had dates that you didn't like. Right. But but also like I think they I mean not that I didn't like, but that I didn't really want to keep pursuing. But they didn't either.

Well, look, you went on some dates and they weren't for you. Who rejected you? He didn't really reject me, but the I did go on a date with

But you didn't like him. I didn't. Yeah, but that's So that's not rejection, but it still feels like it.

I don't want to. Okay, we can stop. He also I think at the same time that I was becoming uninterested was becoming uninterested.

Great. So that's some mutual. That's not rejection. That feels like rejection though.

But it wasn't because you rejected him. Well, it was mutual. Yeah, it was. Yeah. So that's not I just don't think that's rejection. You guys went on a date. He said yes. You went on a date or two

and it and you guys weren't for each other. That that's not rejection. I know. For me it feels like it still.

Okay. I honor that. So I know this is my is that I actually this came up recently not in not in connection at all to dating. I find it very hard knowing someone doesn't like me.

Not necessar not attract. Yes. Not even romantic. Just like if someone is mad at me or if someone decides they don't like me.

Yeah. Sometimes it's fine if I know the reason even if I I probably disagree with the reason. Sure. I actually especially if I disagree with the reason. Yeah. Then it is easy for me.

You accept it. I can accept it. Yeah. Same. But when there's eye toward me that I can't understand

Uhhuh. Um it really bothers me. Right. And I had therapy recently about an interaction.

Uhhuh. And um where where I was like this person just hates me. And it is it is so uncomfortable for me.

Um and you know we had to sort of get to the bottom of it and a lot of it is for me like if someone doesn't like me

then they'll exclude me from their club or their safe spa their area and I'll be alone and I'll be dead. Like it's like it becomes safety so fast. Existential.

Yes. And you know, she had to be remind me. She got her comb out. Yeah. Her comb is so gentle.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, she's a professional and I'm a talk show host. She uses like really good spray and I don't even

She's got a great detangler. I don't feel it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I It's probably Lola V.

Yeah. And I'm a boy trying to get knots out of a girl's hair and I'm just not You're doing a good job. Hang on.

So she basically was like, you know, you have to remember is the is the person or the club or the thing that you're going to be excluded from one you want to be in?

Right. Yeah. And no is the answer. Like no, I don't need acceptance from that person because I don't agree with that person on most things or I don't like the way that person operates or

the people they're around. No, I don't want to be in that club. So, I don't want to be a member of any group that doesn't want me.

Right. But see, I normally have the opposite thing. Yeah. Yeah. I would never be the member of a club that would have me.

Like, I'm so used to that. Yeah. And I have to transition into Yeah. I don't want to be in that

relationship any I don't want to. So, why do I want them to want me? Yes. Yes. Yes.

So, it's, you know, but it is safety and it is old. It's very old. So, it's a rewiring.

Yeah. Um, I deal with the same thing, but it's it's more physical, you know? What do you mean?

Like I my work over the last 10 years has been no one's going to try to physically hurt you. You don't have to protect yourself.

Yeah. And it's very hard to break. It's so hard. And it got we got into another layer of this. Um, I have to be careful about what I say.

Okay. But I do Rob and I already think it's both about us. So, It's about the year you um I do think I have a habit

in general in my life whether it's in any kind of relationship work. Um I put so much in

Mhm. like really give it my all it completely. Uhhuh. And I do it subconsciously. It is not on purpose but it's definitely subconsciously because I am trying to secure my place. Like

well I put you want to make yourself indispensable in every situation. I put in this so obviously they can't get rid of me or I've given all of this so obviously they can't get rid of me. And that's not how life works. It still

I think that's even part of your protector thing which is a part of my protector thing. They'll need me cuz I protect them and they've noticed it.

Yes. And and that's not how life works. And people don't owe you anything. Again, I'm not doing it on purpose. It is not on purpose.

Yeah, I totally get it. It's all in your subconscious. Yes. But no one owes you anything. And so sometimes the people that you've you know thought you in your head you've made it yourself indispensable or you've made you've created a loyalty that must not be broken. Sometimes it does get broken and then I am left feeling like

so confused, so upended like and then you know there's this phrase, how could you after all I've done for you?

Right. And so we, you know, I wrote that phrase down. Yeah. Yeah. And I was like, I don't want to be a person that thinks like that. I don't want to think all after all I've done for you. I don't want to be someone with strings attached. I think that's like

the worst way to relation with people. So, I really need to be careful and watch myself because I I don't mean to do it, but I think it happens.

Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. I think it's common, which is why I'm saying it. And I think it's important to monitor. and she brought up the Allenon phrase, give for free and for fun

and I was like yeah that's like you got to remember that and it's important. I do think I've had this is a very weird statement but I do think I have the privilege and advantage like

your friends were also really great students that went to a great college who all got professional jobs and were largely quite responsible. Yeah. and my friends were like regularly letting me down and [ __ ] my girlfriend and I was doing the same [ __ ] to them.

So, I think earlier in my 20s, I had to get a little better at like, yeah, I'm just going to love them. Like, that's just how it's going to be. And um

yeah, I'm going to give cuz I I want I want to Yeah. Yeah. And I feel like I do like I I

in the moment that is what it feels like. It feels like it's giving and then you start making your case, your court case. You're stepping up to the stand.

Yeah. And so that's the moment to remember it like that's not why you did any of this and they're making these decisions because of this

and it's not about me and that's it. Okay. So I it's been a Yeah, it was an interesting realization. I do think there is a little bit of a fairy tale we tell ourselves which is like this is permanent.

I've invested and it's permanent and it's not. Relationships are like sobriety. It's a daily choice.

Yeah. And you just get that day. Yeah. And it's not going to inoculate you in 3 weeks the work you did today,

you know, if you don't do it on that day. So, it's like, yeah, relationships are very much I think I want them to be like, well, good. I proved myself and now we're good forever.

Yeah. Exactly. And that's just not how they are. They're living and dynamic and changing and and it's kind of every day.

I know. And and you have to decide who gets that energy of yours, like who Yeah. Yeah.

And probably like expectations help a lot. Yeah. In that scenario. Yeah. It's hard. But also, I do think I

there's not a stitch of gum in that mane now. You got it. So, and I'm running the comb through now. And it is like you're not even feeling that I'm running the comb through.

This tiger got it own gum. Yeah. Okay. Oh, I do want hair play. Sure. Yeah. Nice. Um All right. Let's do some facts.

Okay. Okay. Mel, so you said that the closest like high peak um to Michigan is Killington, another place I've been in like

Okay, what do we count as like high peak? I'm going to say over 6,000. Oh, okay. Okay, then this is not

Is Killington even over 6,000? I think it is. Oh, I don't know. Rob, can you look?

4,229. Okay. So, we're not even close to six. We're going to have to make it 4,000 then, I guess, is the cut off

because when you Google it, like high closest high mountain peak to Michigan, it says Mount Arvon.

Where is that? Canada. In the UP, but it's only 2,000 ft. 22,000 ft. Yeah. That's not going to cut it.

Yeah. And there's skiing in the UP. Uh, and it's better than it is in the lower peninsula. It's not It's not a 25minute run down the mountain.

Do they call the LP? Never. Oh wow. Yeah. They just call it Michigan. And if you're stuck in the UP, you have to distinguish that you're saying I'm in the UP.

Okay. Well, now as is appropriate, 99% of the population lives in the LP. So, okay. I just looked up all 50 state high points in the US and how to visit them. Okay. Alaska has Denali.

Denali. Yeah. And let me guess these. Okay. I'm going to say Denali is I want to say between 18 to 20,000 feet.

20,000. 20,310. Good job. Okay. Great. Great. Great. Great. Okay. California. We have a big one.

Yes. In the southern Sierra Nevada Crest. Yeah. I'm going to say up there we get to 129 or 13.

Mount Whitney 14,498. 144. It's pretty good. Okay. Okay. Okay. Um Colorado has Mount Elbert.

I'm going to go with 158 16 14. Oh wow. 14,433. We're getting lower. So, California's is

Yeah, I think Washington's got a 16,000 footer. I'm only seeing I see Mount Reneer.

Mount Reineer. 14,411 ft. Oh, wow. So, nothing's gotten into 16 yet. Yeah. Other than Denali.

Yeah, we're getting this is going down. So, Oh, we're getting smaller and smaller.

Yeah, we have a Wyoming. Wait, did California have the second highest? California. Touche.

I know. We got the ocean. We got the sand dunes. We got the beach. We got the snow.

We got it all. We got the lowest point in the in America in Death Valley. Oh, wow.

And the highest point in the contiguous USA. Wow. That's cool. Congratulations, California.

Mount Hood. You know, Mount Hood. Absolutely. I think that's in the 13s. 11. Hey.

Yeah. What a joke. So, so embarrassing. Puke. Really embarrassing. Wait. Closest to Michigan. Okay. North is New Hampshire closed. Nope.

Well, similar distance to as Vermont. Oh, okay. Well, we're looking at an 11-hour car ride either way.

Mount Washington is 6,288. That's in New Hampshire. Mhm. Wonder if they got skiing there.

They probably do. And I do think it's cuz when we go to Killington Yeah. you go through Canada. We would go up through Canada, then down Niagara, and then over. We wouldn't go through Pennsylvania and New York up. Yeah. Okay.

All right. You did a good job saying interesting because I know that's not interesting to you whether we went the northern or southern route. I thought it was really and you did a really good convincing job of saying interesting.

Oh, here's Michigan. Mount Arvon 1,979. Puke. It's not even 2,000. Georgia has a higher one.

What's your highest? Stone Mountain. No, it's 900 ft. It's called Brass Town Bald.

Well, probably in the northeast getting into the Blue Ridge. Um, 4,784 feet. That's nice. That's killing the size.

Pretty nice. I don't think they're skiing there. Um, all right. Well, that was a fun game.

Yeah. Tammy Fay Baker. Was she from Moskegan? Is that what you say? How do you say Moskegan? Okay. No.

Uhoh. Okay. She's not at all. She's from Minnesota. Same day. Maybe she moved there. Hold on. Let's see.

Her husband was born there. Oh, Jim Baker. Uh, yes. Jim Baker in 1940. Okay. In Moskegan,

Moskegan, Michigan. Okay, great. That answers. You probably brought her there. Yeah, maybe.

What a team those two. Yeah. You're not old enough to really have been seeing them on TV all the time as kids right?

No. Yeah. But I saw the movie. Oh, there's a movie about remember. Oh, who's in it?

You loved it. I love it. Yeah, my favorite movie. Jessica, that was a good movie.

That's a good That was a great movie. Chastain can do anything. She's so good. She is.

Okay. The population of Moskegan in the '9s, I looked up, was approximately 44,000.

Okay. Pretty big. Yeah. And then the population, there's a lot of populations up top of Duth, my hometown, is 31,000.

I think I guess 30,000. You probably guessed right around there. Yeah. Having never been there, just getting a sense of what was available to you

commercially. Food and shopping. Food and shopping. And then adding that I never heard of it before I met you.

Right. Cuz if you had heard of it, you would have gone higher. Yeah. Interesting.

Yeah. I looked up how many what the percentage of people is that identify as morning people. Oh,

okay. Because, you know, she doesn't want to get out of bed. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Neither do I.

Yeah. I hate getting out of bed. It's a genetic thing. There's a marker for it.

Really? Yeah. There are six human chronotypes, not just morning larks and night owls. Oh, there's more.

Oh, wow. There's morning type, evening type, highly active type, daytime sleepy type, daytime type, moderately active type. Daytime type. These sound like um descriptions for like a depends like when you're show like are you moderately active? Are you a night owl?

It does. Um I kind of I like this though because I'm not a morning type or an evening type. I guess I'm a daytime type. Yeah.

And I'm a daytime sleepy type. Yeah, you're a sleepy type. Okay. But it says that 15 approximately 15% of the population identifies as morning people. Larks.

That's it. Yes. I would have thought I was higher. While the majority around 70% are intermediate types and the remaining 15 are evening types. Night owl. What are you

[ __ ] night owl? But it's changed with age. But my whole life, I do so well going to bed at 2:00 a.m. and waking up at 10:00 a.m.

Right. Anytime I had a option for that schedule, that was my schedule. Yeah. Yeah.

I feel like I'm best sleeping at 11. Like my body wants to go to bed at 11:00 and wake up at 9:00.

Yeah. Right. Or 10 or 11. Sure. Or 5:00 p.m. for supper. Just in time for a subie.

Who wrote The Body Keeps the Score? That's Bessel Vanderulk. I feel bad for all these people whose books I know, but I don't know their their names.

Well, it's hard to when you say that name, my brain goes, "We're never getting that one. Don't even try. Don't waste any time." Like, I know to quit.

You're giving up immediately. Absolutely. Well, you couldn't even say it. Bessel Vanderolk, that's hard. Yep. That's hard. I did. You brought up um a brief history of intelligence.

Yeah. And I was proud of myself because I knew immediately Max Bennett. Yeah, that's great. And I don't and we had him and I loved him and I remember his history.

He was great. But the name is hard. I wonder it probably has to do with interacting with the edit more and maybe I like see the name more or something or I've at minimally I've heard it more. I could be wrong about this is my own interpretation of what happened.

Yeah. With me and reading. Okay. I cannot say there's any studies to back this up. This is just what feels like happened. All the words were completely obscure to me.

Yeah. Um I couldn't sound things out. I couldn't look at the letters. They didn't translate to phonetic sounds for me. So I just couldn't just be staring at it. I mean like

it means that. But I think slowly over time I memorized every word in its totality,

right? Like when I see a word, I see the whole thing and I know what it is. Yeah.

Through just tons of practice, I know what they look like as a as a unit, not not a bunch of little units making the word, but as its own unit.

Names are a new thing, and I haven't memorized it in its totality, and I can't really sound it out or look at it.

Yeah, that makes sense. That's my current excuse. It might just be I'm lazy and I don't care about people.

I don't I don't think it's that. But that that Yeah, names are brand new unless they're Dak Shepard or Monica Padman,

Rob Holl, but even Holl is problematic. It's going to be problematic till Rob dies.

Um All right. Well, that's all that. Okay, great. Uh Kellington's sub 5,000. That was a hard one for you to take. But Duth was 30,000 so it's push.

All right. Love you. Love you.

Questions about this episode

What is discussed in "Schwimmer's Legs, Mel Robbins, Tiger Comb | Fact Check for Mel Robbins"?

In order: 0:00 Dcastro, Herium, Kristen, Permium; 5:00 Black Mirror, Friends, Harry Potter, Larry Trilling; 15:00 Baby Mama, Santa Monica, Santa Monica; 20:00 Marina del Rey, Santa Monica; 25:00 Lola V; 30:00 Allenon, Friends; 35:00 Michigan, Denali, Killington, Mount Arvon; 40:00 Moskegan, A Brief History of Intelligence, Jim Baker, Michigan; 45:00 Rob Holl, Santa Monica.

What is mentioned in this Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard episode?

56 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including Michigan, Santa Monica, Moskegan, Friends, Killington, Mount Arvon. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "Schwimmer's Legs, Mel Robbins, Tiger Comb | Fact Check for Mel Robbins"?

The episode runs 46 min; the transcript is about 8,856 words in 299 timestamped sections.

More from Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard

About this transcript: the episode's spoken words as captioned on YouTube, split into timestamped sections. Reclip.Me locates every person, work and idea in the text, keeps the time it is first named, and quotes the words around it verbatim. Last updated November 21, 2025.