Transcript

Giggling about cortisol, choking, and bidets with Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo

From Giggly Squad · Episode page · Watch on YouTube

· 54 min · 11,711 words · 324 timestamped sections

This is the full, timestamped transcript of "Giggling about cortisol, choking, and bidets with Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo", an episode of Giggly Squad published January 30, 2026 (54 min, about 11,711 words). It mentions 11 people, works and ideas, including Giggly Squad, Harry Styles, Khloe Kardashian, Lululemon, Squatty Potty.

What this episode is about

Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo discuss their chaotic lives, touching on topics like personal grievances about public restroom behavior, the challenges of maintaining a busy schedule, and light-hearted banter about hair color and personal appearances. Their playful, humorous dialogue reflects on everyday experiences, blending comedy with relatable frustrations.

Key takeaways

  • Public restroom etiquette should include a 'light tap only' rule to avoid hostage situations.
  • Harry Styles embodies modern celebrity efficiency: one concert location, supreme exclusivity.
  • Owning a bidet is like discovering a new level in bathroom luxury—it's all about the throne experience.
  • How did we go from Squatty Potty to toilet seat heaters and bidets without a cultural revolution?
  • Is there a hidden hierarchy among public restroom users? The 'patience tapper' vs. 'door banger' dichotomy.

Who speaks in this episode?

What is discussed, and when

  1. – 5:00: Giggly Squad, Harry Styles, Khloe Kardashian, Squatty Potty
  2. – 10:00: Harry Styles, Giggly Squad
  3. – 15:00: Giggly Squad, Victoria Beckham
  4. – 20:00: Giggly Squad
  5. – 35:00: Khloe Kardashian, MasterClass
  6. – 40:00: Lululemon
  7. – 53:37: Giggly Squad, Donna Kelsey, Taylor Swift

Notable quotes from "Giggling about cortisol, choking, and bidets with Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo"

  • Why don't you just embrace your Megan Fox moment? You look like a Kardashian.
    about Megan Fox · at
  • Harry Styles? Because I have some Jenzie correspondents that tell me what's going on. He's coming back to MSG. Tickets are like $1,000 each.
    about Harry Styles · at
  • I just don't think it would be true. And then like the rest of the articles like the Beckhams did not foresee like their son signing a prenup. They thought like it would obviously be the other way around.
    about Victoria Beckham · at
  • Wait, do you know that I downloaded and bought the subscription to MasterClass just because I wanted to listen to hers.
    about Khloe Kardashian · at
  • Loved it cuz that was him having fun, you know. But recently, as you guys know, I love Lululemon, and I just was Let's go to Lululemon and do their men's stuff is amazing. So, he grabbed some stuff.
    about Lululemon · at
  • Pull the nice old lady off? And then they played it that everyone was just Donna, you're a traitor. They made her a traitor. everyone knew.
    about Donna Kelsey · at
  • No. but anyhoo, we love you guys. Thank you so much for giggling with us. And I think our Netflix thing with Mindy Kaling and Kate Hudson ticket.
    about Giggly Squad · at

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

People

  • Harry Styles — Person · Referenced celebrity / concert-touring artist · 4 mentions · first at
    Used as a jumping-off point for a discussion about fandom, ticket queues, and his perceived cultural moment (incl. comparisons to other pop stars).
  • Khloe Kardashian — Person · Referenced celebrity / business example · 2 mentions · first at
    Referenced both as a look-comparison (“Kardashian” aesthetic) and as a business success case via Skims and her MasterClass.
  • Donna Kelsey — Person · Referenced reality-TV participant / emotional beat · 1 mention · first at
    Cited as a moment that made the host emotional in a discussion about reality TV production, contracts, and perceived “fake” storylines (The Traitors).
  • Victoria Beckham — Person · Referenced celebrity / fashion figure in gossip segment · 1 mention · first at
    Mentioned as a subject the hosts follow for celebrity/fashion gossip, specifically via Page Six coverage of the Beckham family.
  • Taylor Swift — Person · Referenced celebrity (context: privacy/PR around Donna Kelsey) · 1 mention · first at
    Mentioned as a likely reason production would avoid probing questions, highlighting how celebrity proximity changes reality-TV behavior.
    Let's not like No, she probably in the van immediately. They were So, what's Taylor like?
  • Megan Fox — Person · Referenced celebrity / style comparison · 1 mention · first at
    Used as a shorthand for a specific dark-hair, high-glam aesthetic (“Megan Fox moment”) during a hair-color/style bit.

Companies & orgs

  • Lululemon — Company · Recommendation · 2 mentions · first at
    Mentioned as a preferred brand for clothing by one of the hosts.
  • Amazon — Company · Incidental mention · 1 mention · first at
    Mentioned in passing during a discussion about live events.
    I did an Amazon live yesterday and I had a girl write in Oh my god, are you going to get tickets to Harry Styles? And I was No. I didn't even know Harry Style tickets.

Products & tech

  • Giggly Squad — Product · Host's own product · 6 mentions · first at
    The podcast being discussed, hosted by the speakers.
  • Squatty Potty — Product · Recommendation · 1 mention · first at
    Mentioned as a favorite product by one of the hosts.
    Cuz we're not Japan. Because America started on my Squatty Potty. That's like my favorite.
  • MasterClass — Product · Recommendation · 1 mention · first at
    Mentioned as a subscription service one of the hosts uses for learning.
    Wait, do you know that I downloaded and bought the subscription to MasterClass just because I wanted to listen to hers.

Full transcript with timestamps

You know we're making art here. Sup gigglers. Gary, fix the Wi-Fi. Manifest that [ __ ]

We can't be managed. I mean, the day just got away from me. What's up, my grizzly gigglers? We're back. Two episodes a week is like I'm in a K-hole. I'm in a giggly khole.

I'm going to be honest. At first, I was like, are we going to be able to do it? We have crazy schedules. We're tired. were like

we have so many excuses for anything and it's I don't know how we weren't doing I have so much to say.

I have so we would for forget things so by the time it was a week I starting from zero.

Let me start. Oh, you begin. You haven't said anything about my god awful hair color

cuz it's made up in your head. Hannah, this top layer is black. You're no better than a man.

You really aren't. It sound like she goes, "I'm a dark dark dark brown and this is light black.

I'm a chestnut. You're a chestnut. I'm chestnut under here and here is black. Why don't you just embrace your Megan Fox moment? You look like a Kardashian."

Okay, fine. I have some hot takes. Okay. I'm so sick and tired and tired of [ __ ] when I'm in a public restroom.

Oh my god. We're changing the name of this podcast to just Hannah shits. My life in the bathroom.

Hannah talks about and also her [ __ ] Like my life is just one trip to the bathroom with breaks in between. Now just this is just a gripe I have that I need the public to know about.

Okay. What is with people trying to break the [ __ ] door down when it's clearly locked? Like you know there's two types of people. When you you don't know if it's

multiple stall stalls. Multiple stalls. This is also when it's just like you're in a coffee shop and there's one bathroom. When you go to check if it's locked or not, you don't need to [ __ ] like have a full-time like kidnapping situation. Just lightly press it up and down.

So, you're saying the initial door they're banging on, not your stall door. Not. But even the stall door when they try to open it, it's like they they like aggressively like if I push it hard enough, it'll pop open. Like just lightly push and you'll know if it's locked or not. I'm sitting there in a hostage situation, someone banging the door down and it's like clearly it's like

put your leg up to like keep the door. Yeah. That never happens to you where you're you're just having a peaceful poop and out of nowhere you're getting assaulted by someone trying to open the door. What ever happened to a light tap?

That's never happened to me. Well, well, you don't go to public restrooms. No, I have, but I'm not in there long enough, I feel like, for people to be like, "What's going on in there?"

So, you're saying that I'm No, but I feel like I'll get they've called the manager at this point. They're like someone something's going on in there.

Someone's But I I feel like I have bad luck where I'll be like, okay, this is my one time of solace during the day. Going in this restroom, locking the door at peace and immediately someone's knocking and I'm like, I just got here.

Okay. Actually, I now I'm on the countdown. I have a quick bathroom thing that might change your whole life. I got a new toilet. This toilet has a bedet. It has a dryer. The seat is heated. It flushes four. It essentially does.

I don't think I can go back. I can only go to ba the bathroom in this one specific toilet and that's it.

Well, they do say not using a bedet or not using like a wipe is like flossing without brushing your teeth.

Well, now I'm like, why aren't these in everyone's home? This is disgusting. Cuz we're not Japan. Because America started on my Squatty Potty. That's like my favorite.

You You still have the Squatty Potty? Of course. I've had it for like six years.

We go to the bathroom differently. Let me just tell you, I've lit a candle. I've had I have classical music.

Put your phone on. Do not disturb. Let go and let God. What a great way to start Friday episode. You were talking about something earlier and I want to bring it back up because I had something to say about it and it was hairstyles. Yeah.

What was your question? Well, I said, "What do we think about Harry Styles?" Because I have some Jenzie correspondents that tell me what's going on. He's coming back to MSG. Tickets are like $1,000 each.

I did an Amazon live yesterday and I had a girl write in like, "Oh my god, are you going to get tickets to Harry Styles?" And I was like, "No." I didn't even know Harry Style tickets went on sale.

I didn't know. Does he have new music? I have no idea. Oh, he has a new album. This is the thing. We weren't One Direction girls. I'm not a fan.

He's there. Justin Timberlake before Justin Timberlake is what he is now. There's no one in the world I'm a fan enough of

to stand in a queue. Okay. Are you British now? No. Because like when you go like if you go on and you buy a Giggly Squad ticket, you're getting a Giggly Squad ticket. You're not fighting the other people. Like I've never gone on I've never set a timer like ticket master is putting these on now. Let me go stand in the queue like virtually and wait. What do I look like?

You know what I do respect though? That he's like, "Yeah, I'll go and tour, but I'm only doing it in one place.

You come to me." I actually so efficient. It's so [ __ ] boy of him though. Be like, "Come to my house or don't.

Send me an Uber at least." My thing though is like with him dating Zoe Kravitz, I would I wouldn't have seen the jump from Channing Tatum to Harry Styles, but also none of my boyfriends have ever looked similar.

None of mine look exactly the same. Oh my Oh my gosh. Wait, I've actually never

I want over 6'2 with blue eyes and I'm done. We're good. I've never mentally looked at them all in a lineup, but yeah, mine is like

all over the place. And I mean the range you have, babe, it's incredible. If you put mine all in a line, you'd be like, "What? Weird."

Is there anything similar? Definitely not sense of humor. Definitely not intelligence. Definitely not height. Definitely not.

You know what? I've reverted back to the type of guys I dated in high school, which were my favorite. You bring it up every day. You go, "Good morning to you and to my favorite boyfriend that I dated in high school."

Well, honest. like in Tik Tok where they're like, "Who was your crush when you were little?"

Who's your current boyfriend? What I've gone back to. My crush when I was little. Like the first time I had like an experience where I was like, I think I like want to have sex with this guy was in the movie um 10 Things I Hate About You. And it's not Heath Ledger. It's the other guy who's like the [ __ ] but he has like dark hair. What is his name?

See, I'm Heath Ledger. That's why we're best friends. And that's that I would say would was like my first sexual awakening.

Did you like the guy in Bring It On who was the brother? First of all, no. I thought he was gay.

Yeah. At a young age, I go, "You're gay." And you know why you're not obsessed with Harry Styles? Cuz he wears a scarf.

Do you want to know why I didn't like that guy? He wrote her a song. You hate that? Oh, yeah. He had a guitar.

And then she played it in her room. I was like, "Okay, unrealistic. This is disgusting." All my boyfriends were exactly the same except some more narcissistic than others and you I just had to find like a guy who had ego very different personalities. None of your boyfriends have had the same personalities.

Well, one thing I'm proud of women for is when they like have a gorgeous man and they're like, "Yeah, but he's boring." See, I could stay with a gorgeous man for years cuz I entertain myself.

I just kind of need him to physically be there. I'm no better than a man. And I'm just like, you are an accessory to me cuz I'm I'm overwhelmed with what's going on with me. I don't need your own life coming into mine.

My thing was, you would have thought I was trying to go into therapy for college with the type of men I've dated.

And I feel like now I'm like, what's best for my cortisol? And that's how I'm picking.

I feel like there needs to be a cortisol check when you're dating a guy. And if it goes over it, it's just women in STEM. It's just science. you can't date him cuz your unregulated nervous system. your 20s you're like always unregulated but by your 30s you're like we need to regulate

waking up in the middle of the night thinking about something in my 30s I got to get out of

I hate to say this but like if I'm not eating at first it's fun at first you're like we're detoxing

but if if I can't eat that's a serious problem that's when my mom pulls me aside and she's like you didn't eat your bolognese and henna I know

would have had seconds thirds and fourths the second I can't eat a pasta cuz there's a man in my life that's making me nauseous.

I need to get rid of him. See, when that hits, I'm like, let me stay one more year.

Really get this body right. He's just got to not respond two more times and I'm at my goalie.

Can I say one more thing about men? Yeah. I had this epiphany with actually Ally on the road.

No men are assistants. No straight men. If you wanted an assistant and a straight man walked in the room, you'd be like,

"No, oh, I'm looking for someone to help me." Men don't help you. One time when I was like looking for assistance, I like gave a criteria and they were like, "Okay, Paige, that's illegal. We can't There can't be an age range. You can't say one gender." I'm like,

she's like, "I'm just looking for a Gemini." I'm like, "No one over 30." Gross. I want them young and scared. But the truth is, like, if you think about it, like there's no male assistants. I guess like I'm thinking about like WME, the agency there are. And you're always like, "Okay, well, we're missing a lot of details in that email."

I don't know if I ever get emails from a guy assistant. I I'd love the stats of how many male assistants they are and also how quick they get promoted.

I was just going to say how quick they rise to like being an agent compared to the girls.

I mean, a gay man assistant is great, except I feel like he was judging me all the time.

Yeah, I could see that. I almost hired a gay, which I could use. Guy assistant. Yeah. Um, wait. I saw something on page six, which like I rarely go on page six, but sometimes I like to have a little a little goss, but like I don't believe

truly anything I read on there. It's more like what are people's PR pushing? Yeah, it's more like fanfiction. It's more like, oh, that was a fun story to come up with or like something. Sometimes I've read like full stories about myself and I've been like, when did that happen? But anyway, so I go on page six because I was really looking for like Victoria more Victoria Beckham stuff because I can't get enough. This is definitely not true, but there's an article that says Nola's dad, who is a billionaire, gives her $1 million a month as her allowance.

I have so much respect. I just don't think it would be true. And then like the rest of the articles like the Beckhams did not foresee like their son signing a prenup. They thought like it would obviously be the other way around.

But I'm just thinking like what would you do? What could one do with a million dollars a month?

I'm going to say it not to be like too optimistic about life, but more money, more problems.

Yeah, totally. Like I had a friend who was really rich and her family was always fighting because like so and so got gifted a Lexus and she got gifted an Audi and and like this is what they're fighting about. And um to do a metaphor, I don't know why I was thinking about this before I go to I went to sleep, but how

wow I can't wait to I was thinking last night. Yeah, last night when I was in a Khole, I was thinking about the perspective of life.

Marilyn Monroe. Just a light just a light evening. You think of light cute things as you go to sleep. You're [ __ ] adorable.

I've been reading my book. Well, yeah. Cuz you're like trying to run away from something.

Or something. I haven't figured out what it is yet. You're pretending. I'm avoiding something. You're like, "If I just try to learn how to read in this moment, I won't remember all everything I regret in my entire life."

So, I was thinking about two types of people. Yeah. Some person might get a diamond ring

and another person as a gift and another person fully thought out this might get gifted a rock and how the person who got the ring might have

There's no way you sat up in bed. I swear to God. Now, was set the scene though. Was the TV on and this was just like an inside thought or were you trying to fall asleep and you were like this like did something spark this idea?

I feel like sometimes when I go to sleep I envision like I'm talking to you on Giggly Squad. Do you ever like work out bits and I'm was like thinking about like what inspirational thing I'd want to say on Giggly Squad.

I've never had an original experience ever. Well, cuz when I say something funny, I immediately put it in the perspective of me telling you on Giggly Squad. Do you know that I bought a shower notepad? Because there's so many times in the shower I'm like, "Girl, I got to tell Hannah this, but immediately you step out, you forget

and you and then you like have self-hatred and then you go on a spiral." So anyway, I was thinking about when someone gets a ring, first of all, they might might not like who gave them the ring. They might have wanted a different shape ring. They might not like the kind of ring they wanted a a lab and they got whatever. But how sometimes people will get a rock and they love the person who gave it to them and the rock is actually meaningful for some reason and there's like an inside joke or a meaningful thing and how some people are happier with a rock than a ring.

Not me. And that was um Mel Robbins. My mom always said actually I don't know if my mom said this anyway. I heard a quote like years ago that I always remembered. I think I like heard it in college that was I rather love on a bike than cry in a limo and I always thought not me.

Your mom also said don't marry for money or or you're going to you'll work for it every day.

Work for it every day. Which is true. I've also never been in the situation to marry

because I also think I would do that as well. I'm exhausted. I did not foresee this for myself. I'm actually pissed at my own confidence. Okay, I really got myself in a pickle a lot of times.

I could be in a house right now and like I don't even want to talk about it. There's a lot of different houses.

There's so many different houses I could be in right now. And you want to know where I am? Here with you.

Here in But you want to know what I'm peaceful? I'm your rock. I'm your ugly little rock.

You're my rock that I'm like Hey, do you know how many comments I've seen like on the internet of like Paige? Paige and Hannah like aren't really friends. Like, you want to know what people don't realize about us and our friendship and our personalities in general? Yeah, maybe we have different interests. Maybe Hannah comes looking like a sex therapist sometimes. Where are your glasses? Put your glasses on. He can't see without his glasses. Um, I'm obsessed. No, Hannah when she sat down literally leaned over to me and it felt like she was going to be like, "So, you're not orgasming.

That's a problem." So, what are you thinking about when he's on top? That's actually a phenomenal question. And sometimes a lot of stuff.

Also, it's normalize more men going on top. Why are women going on top? Like, we already income tax. Anyway, continue.

Yeah. I honestly think we've done such a good job because one thing the internet loves is pitting women against each other. Yeah.

And I think Oh, I remember I was gonna say sorry. If I just say pitting women against each other, you're like, "Yeah, I'm I'm clocked in."

People don't realize that we have such similar personalities. Yeah. In terms of like our core values and our at our core stance, I would say our mantra for living is I don't care. Oh,

like we don't care. Our the depth of our friendship, we are literally the same.

Yeah. So, like if we were to even get in a fight about something, it have we'd have to strive really hard to care

cuz I get really nice messages about us sometimes and they're like, "Oh, that's called like unconditional love where like even if you're upset at each other, you know, it's coming from a it's not coming from a bad place,

right?" Um, also this is a little controversial, but people know us from our friendship from a reality TV show. And I'm just going to tell a story and I might get in trouble, but I just want to tell a story. There was a situation where like you have to realize that

I know all your stories, but I get ready like I know. Meanwhile, you could tell the story.

I'm kidding. That did not happen. I'm like, you were there on reality TV like friendships are part of the story line. friendship breaks up a part of the story line. They want to see who's closer to who, whatever.

Yeah. Let me just give you a day in the life of shooting a reality TV show. There was an episode where one of the girls who I loved um was sobbing about something. Yeah.

And me and you were distraught and we were like, "We have to comfort her." We both go run to comfort her. A producer literally puts his arm in front of me like tackles me and he said, "No, let Paige handle this." And I'm like, but that's my good friend and I want to be there. And I realize now like, oh, they want to show like two people being closer than someone else. And in the moment, you feel like helpless or you feel like, okay, this might look people might now be mad at me that I'm not like comforting someone, but um what you see on those shows is what they want you to see.

And the friendships on those shows also That's so true. I keep forgetting that that's our our

origin story. Our origin story. Yeah. You have to understand like the root of it.

Yeah. where things come from where when people see us know us just from Giggly Squad. They're like they're best friends.

Also, I think there's a lot of politics that I wasn't always good at with reality TV of like keeping people sweet where like you just like get along with them for the sake of it.

Yeah. So, that's my like two cents on friendships. Okay. Um and us. Speaking of my husband,

this is what it's like living with a man. He was drinking water and it went down the wrong pipe.

Yeah. went on for two hours. Like to the point that I started laughing cuz like he was choking to death. And I was like, "Can you order Uber Eats like right before you choke to death? I just have like one more thing I want to add to it."

Yeah. But but then I started feeling bad for him cuz people don't talk about Mhm.

how traumatizing something going down the wrong pipe is cuz you're choking to death, but everyone knows you're not going to die. So no one helps you, but you're still fully choking to death.

What was the two hours of like when you say it lasted for two hours? like he was clearing his throat for two hours or he was just talking about how he almost died.

He was clearing his throat like it was like like you know when you just can't get it

somewhere right now not fully recovered. Yeah. And like I can't help and also like he's fine but he's not.

You know what's crazy too is that like women women just um obviously we have a higher pain tolerance. That's why we bear children. You know like that. I don't know how anyone can even like argue that. It's like, okay, but we push a watermelon

out of something that's the size of a peanut. Mine is smaller, but yeah. And then the peanut grow to get like that alone is scientific.

I do have to say though, stubbing your toe. I've been shot. You know what I was going to It's funny that you say that cuz I was going to say and I'm obviously getting a C-section. What [ __ ] world?

Like what are you allowed to be like, give me a C-section? I mean, actually, I don't know.

I actually have no [ __ ] idea. Um, I have heard like a lot of women women say um that they've asked for C-sections and their doctors have been like, "No,

cuz it is like you're cutting your abs in half." Yes. But then I did have a girlfriend say um my gynecologist had a C-section. All the gynecologists in that group had a C-section. I'm getting a C-section

now. I think it's just like a longer obvious recovery and like you do have a scar.

I just don't I know in myself. I'm not built. I don't have the hips for it. Did I tell you on stage I've been talking about like should I have a baby? And I talk about like how you're like freeze your eggs, whatever.

Like a little and someone raises their hand. I'm like who thinks I should have kids? And normally they're like you'd be a great mom or like it's it'll it's good material. This girl said the most genius thing. She goes, "Your long torso can handle it."

You also have good hips. I have good hips. I have a lot of space. Like I think I might be one of those girls who like have two abs on top. I think I have to get abs first. But like,

wait, that actually just made me scared. I started to get worried about you because I have the shortest torso in America.

You have a shortest to torso, long gorgeous legs. Where's the baby going to go?

Imagine I had twins. Do I? Do you want me to surrogate for you? Cuz I'll have room. I'll have your baby and my baby. Could you make Could that happen? That would be so [ __ ] cute.

I feel like that like could happen. Anyway, we're not going to get into it. We're not going to get into the science of it all.

I didn't think about that. Like, yeah, you probably will carry. You'll be more comfortable than I will be.

I mean, we'll see. You never know, but I do know like I have I just know I'm going to [ __ ] punt it out of me. Like, I'm like like an athlete. Like I'm ready to just I love how we're nowhere near pregnant. By the way,

I'm going to cry the whole time. Like I actually decided I can't do it. I don't want to do it.

And people get scared about like having the baby, but then I also feel like it'll feel like puking. Like you know when you're like it's going to suck, but it's going to feel so [ __ ] good after. Like that's how I see it. Pull. You're just like pull the trigger.

Puke and rally. Just get it out of Pop it out and rally. Wait. I do feel like last thing about babies because it's just like a hypothetical. I do feel like you will be in the room when I give birth and you'll be like, "Okay, we don't even know this girl yet though." Like, we have to be careful. Like, we don't really even know them.

Immediately I'm going to be like, "Do you think she likes me? Do you think he likes me?"

You're going to be like, "So, are you guys closer than we are?" I'm like, "I don't." She gave you a weird look. I go, "She's kind of making it all about her right now." And like, you just had a really traumatizing time and she's trying to

put a bow on her and you're like, "So, you're already gifting her. I got it." Wait, why did I just envision you putting a bow on like one hair at the top of your baby's head and being like, "Perfect." Yeah, I will. I've already thought about like the mini little butterfly clips that I could do like a little ponytail with.

I'm going to bedazzle it. I can't believe you couldn't notice my hair. I can't even look at myself in the face.

There is like lighting happening in the room. No, this No, it's my hair. That's what it looks crazy.

Well, whatever you look doesn't look worse. What? Like it doesn't look bad. Like you don't I'm not like Whoa, that's bad.

Oh, okay. I am, but whatever. Okay. What were you going to say? I cut you off. Okay. Okay. So, I don't want to compare our cats cuz they're both perfect.

Yeah. But Butter is a little more slender. Mhm. Yes. As like Butter's tiny. She's the run to the litter.

And Butter Butter's a model. Daf's an actress. Yes. That's But Daphne also I would love to see her shaven cuz she's probably like act actually I mean

you want her mom to get a pixie cut. You want to shave my daughter? It feel it's it's I get what people on the internet are saying. You hate me.

She has so much fluff. She's a little fluffern nutter. Yeah. Like you'd like to see what her body Yeah. Like when I pet her, I don't feel her body. It's crazy. Where Butter like you're immediately like and that's your rib.

Um so Butterball, one of her favorite things to do, which Dafany would love to do if she could, she hides in little she hides in little places. Like remember Daphany was hiding and like you see her entire like bottom half of her body from under the table. She does that.

It's so cute. She's think she's slick. So, today um we got a new like cabinet for the bathroom and I was looking for my toothbrush.

Yeah. I open one of the drawers. Butter comes flying out. I don't know how she got How the hell did she get in the drawer?

She can open cabinet. Like she can open things. You ever like have one of those bathroom cabinets where when you open it there's like a hole in the underneath? There's like a hole somewhere.

Okay. She slithered away in. She scared the [ __ ] out of me. I scared the [ __ ] out of her. We both went We both yelled. Dez is like, "What's going on? I'm busy choking to death." We had a crazy morning, but like at any time your cat could be like in the fridge. Like people don't talk about that enough with having cats. Like they literally see a room and they're like, "I will find the one hiding." People always think they lose their cat.

Honestly, not Daphne. No. Well, poor girl can't. She Well, she can't fit in that crevice. She maybe she'd like to, but she's like

cats can contort their bodies. She She's designer, so like you don't contort it.

It's like trying to put a Birkin like in a suitcase and crumple it up. You're not going to smush it. You'll hurt the leather.

Yes, that's I was just going to say I don't know why I'm asking you this, which is such a mean way to start this sentence.

Give it to me. But I feel like I'm always like looking for new jeans. You go. This is more just towards the ether. This isn't towards you specific. In fact actually don't answer this.

Like no matter what day of the week it is, no matter what season it is, I'm always like I have no pants. Yes.

And like I hate my I always hate my jeans. Even if I see a girl wearing a pair of jeans and I'm like yes, that's exactly what I'm looking for. And you order those jeans, then I get them and I'm like, I [ __ ] hate these jeans.

Well, depending on your body type, it's a whole thing. Also, I don't know about you, but when I shop, I shop for tops. Shopping for pants is like a like that's like getting new shoes. Not new shoes, that's like getting a new house. Like

No, it's a big commitment. Yeah. Like trying on pants. Also, I feel like I don't want as many pants as I have tops.

Here's what I also do. I feel like I'm always ordering pants. I'm trying them on and I'm returning them.

Yeah. Because I feel like you can deal with kind of an uncomfy top, but if your pants are uncomfortable, like you can't run. I'm just I'm having I'm just having pant problems. Well,

what brand jeans are your go-to? So, I love Abberrombie and Fitch. I love Made Well for just like good jeans. They're not too stiff. Like, I can't always fit into like vintage stiff jeans.

I'm obsessed. That's what I'm looking for. I'm looking for like a stiff comfy jeans. It's not going past my thighs. I love a gold a goldie. Yeah,

I love their um barrel jean. Okay. I'm obsessed with their barrel jean. Everyone compliments me on it. I don't know if it's just like

Do you want to know the jeans I've been wearing the most? What? I have these like black jeans from Mango.

Great. It actually pisses me off because I'm like, these were the least expensive of all the jeans that I'm looking at. I have a pair I don't know why I did this. I literally got bullied into buying a pair of Kate jeans.

I hate them. there. I first of all I don't have a torso. So anything that goes like above my belly button I'm like it's on your nipple.

Yeah. I'm like okay so p jeans are the whole outfit. Like I guess I'll put a bandeau on. Like I look ridiculous.

I cannot with expensive things that are worse than cheap things. Like it makes me that's

the thing that annoys me the most is I bought them. I put them on and I was like yeah no. And then I had people being like no you're going to wear them. So no they're like the perfect jean. You have to keep them. And then I kept these jeans and I'm like, "This was the biggest waste of money." And this was two years ago.

And I still look at these jeans and I'm like, "Fuck you." That's like when someone pressures you to order something like expensive on the menu and they're like, "It's so worth it. It's what they're known for." And then you get it and it tastes like [ __ ] and you're like, "I just want the cheeseburger.

Yeah, I just want the cheeseburger. Why did I get this pasta that has all this weird [ __ ] in it?"

When doubt, I'm ordering a grilled cheese sandwich. What? You'd never go wrong. If you're ever one of my biggest feelings that I hate is when you're hungry but you don't know what to eat.

Never happens to me, but yeah. Wait, really? I'm like a pregnant woman. I know every time what I want. I'm very

You're never like walking around the kitchen at like 7:00 p.m. and you're like, "What do I even feel like?"

Well, I've never been in a kitchen, first of all. Um, no, I always know. It's like my It's like my

That's your my calling. Your superpower. That's my superpower. Like I also wanted to make an app that's like you know you go into Uber Eatats and either you want like one specific dish like you're like I need eggplant parmesan.

Yeah. But I want like to see all the eggplant parmesan not just like the random restaurants but also put in like do you want do you want savory? Do you want vegetable? Like put more general things and then it like gives you like more specific recommendations cuz like deciding what you're going to eat every day gives people a lot a lot of anxiety.

Okay. I lowkey wish that like when you went on Uber Eats you could have friends and then you could see what they were eating.

Oh my god. Like I want to be an Uber Eatats influencer. I would kill it. I'd be like guys

that. No, I think they should do photos with it. Be like this because how many times are you like okay same thing with like Netflix. I wish I could go onto my Netflix and I could have friends and I could just see what they were watching so I could be like, "Oh my god, I didn't I forgot about that."

Maybe it's like an app. See, we like to come up with business ideas on this. Maybe it's like an app of like called Taste where it's everyone's taste of

I have the logo. It's It's in the works right now. Just Stephanie's face. So And it's your taste for all

things. So it's all in one place. So then you see like what people are eating and everything can like what you're listening to, what you're eating, what Yeah. what you're watching. And

wait, we might have to cut this out because we need to trademark that. We need to do this.

Wait, that's a brilliant idea. Well, because also, let's be honest, word of mouth is what works. Not people like

not a a television commercial. You're not suddenly going to be like, "Oh, I need to eat that tonight."

Unless it's Kinder chocolate, then absolutely get that. Which, by the way, still waiting for my shipment. I haven't haven't found it yet. I'm like, I better have a [ __ ] year supply of Kinder cuz I love that [ __ ] Remember how I was talking about with your closet how there's all these clothes that you like but you never wear and I don't know what to do with them cuz they're starting to build up. Someone had genius advice. She was like, if you're on the fence, force yourself to try it on and you'll know.

Cuz you know that stuff that you're just like it's always there. It looks about all my pants. Like getting dressed in the morning. I'm like, "Okay, I have great jackets. I have really cool tops. I can accessorize this with cool belts." And then I get to the bottom half and I'm like, "What are we doing here?"

See, my toxic trait is I'll wear a jean for weeks. The same jean. Yeah. Yeah. I can

You just rotate the top. I can picture your favorite pair of jeans in my head. Yeah. But also, this is why I love a set. You love a set.

Yeah. It helps you come up with the whole outfit. And I love monochromatic stuff.

Yeah. Which leads me to another thought. Okay, I was thinking about Kim Kardashian Skims.

I'm always thinking about her and like honestly she's beyond crushing it. Like if she was a man.

Wait, do you know that I downloaded and bought the subscription to MasterClass just because I wanted to listen to hers. But they have so many

Yeah, Amy Puller has one. They have so many really good ones. I actually think it's worth the subscription if you're like want to better your or you want to like learn about a specific thing.

If you want to better yourself. Not really. No, but what does she talk about on it? Cuz she could talk about so many things.

Watch. But I mean I just have this. You know what people don't call out which is iconic and you and me we would love this.

Yeah. Kanye had Yeezy, right? Yeah. And if you remember like the fashion shows, it was very like monochromatic and like he had like crazy shoes.

She definitely like learned from being with him like about Oh, that's like a whole lore thing. Yeah.

Well, cuz Skiims is literally like if Yeezy was mainstream successful and for women. Well, she talks she's talked about that before

inspired her that like when they started dating, he 100% did a whole overhaul of her style and that like she wasn't taken seriously by any like major fashion

um like publications like Vogue. Like Vogue would never put her on the cover. Like the first time she was on the cover was with him.

Yeah. Um so I think and she had a video the other day or something. I don't know where she was and she was wearing an outfit and she was like wearing Yeezy heels from years ago and she was like they truly are the best shoes.

So he definitely I definitely think like influence if your man isn't good for you at least look through what he's done in his life and pull anything you can learn from it and then use it against him later.

I'm trying to think if I've dated anyone that they've influenced any part of like my style. Oh.

Oh, you thought I was gonna say of my life. Wait, so you have you ever changed your style though based on the vibe because a lot of celebrities will you know like Bella Hadid is when is when with like the alligator hunter. No, that's London Ray. Bell Hadid was with the cowboy.

With the cowboy. She defin Oh, did they? Mhm. Oh my god. Okay. Because I was going to say the last like three paparazzi pictures I was like, "These are great outfits. Where the [ __ ] have you been?" Also, she's working. She's back working. I don't want to blame the man.

I don't want to blame the man. Maybe she was just having fun. She's stuck in a rodeo somewhere. I was like, "What are we doing?"

The only time a man's ever like kind of tried to inspire my style is when they'll see like a sexy dress or a sexy top and they're like, "Why don't you wear that?" And I'm like, "Cuz I don't want to. And it's not comfortable."

The only time a man has inspired my style is I was in my early 20s and I had a guy being like, "Don't wear that. Wear this." Like, "You should wear." And then I realized I was in fact in an abusive relationship.

You're like, "Okay, this is the first couple months a paper bag over my head. What do you mean wear this?"

The first couple months I was like, "Okay, yeah, I like this dress. Like I can wear this."

I love turtleneck sweaters. Four months in, my mom goes, "You look ridiculous. You look like a clown.

What are you wearing?" Did you see the tweet that made me think of you when people go, "Who is this clown?" is the best thing to say because first of all, you're calling someone a clown, but then you're also saying they're not even famous enough to be a well-known clown. You say, "Who is this clown?"

Just like as an insult to anyone. I feel like you've said that before. I've definitely said that to a guy before. Like

I do know that I've I have influenced every single guy I've dated style in like a nice way. That's like I like doing that stuff and so and I have ideas and I really never got that much push back. I mean a couple times where they were like

that's my favorite sandal. Yeah. Like I hate you and I'm like okay but you look better. Like hate me all the way to a photo shoot.

Yeah. Hate me all the way to the photo shoot. Hate me after the reviews come in. Okay.

No. Truly hate me after go viral. I think I have to be a little more subtle because I'm not like Mrs. Fashion. Also, I'm not like passionate about men's fashion.

Okay. But if I dated you and you and I said, "Hey, um, do you think this joke is funny?" And you gave me your literal opinion and you were like, "No." I would take that as, "Okay, well, she knows."

Also, speaking of dating me, there's also a lore of the internet that is convinced that like we are lesbian lovers, but like in a nonsexual marriage. And like a lot of lesbians just listen to our pod as a lesbian podcast. They're like, "It's our favorite lesbian podcast."

Thank God. And I said, "That is actually what we've been trying. That's actually what we've set out to do."

Yes. So, in terms of fashion, Dez, as you guys know, he's lived a long life before me.

Yeah. He's had a lot of influences and he has a way about him. And it's hard to teach an old dog new tricks.

Also, you have to do it subtly. Mhm. Now, Dez famously loves wearing suits when he performs.

Oh, god. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And he looks so handsome in them, but this is like what he's been doing for a long time.

I did get rid of some of his He had like a floral shirt that was annoying me that somehow got out of the rotation. I don't know how. Maybe my mom got rid of it. I don't know. But

I actually feel like I know what floral shirt you're talking about. Was it navy blue?

Yeah. There's also a purple one. He loved it cuz that was him having fun, you know. But recently, as you guys know, I love Lululemon, and I just was like, "Let's go to Lululemon and do their men's stuff is amazing." So, he grabbed some stuff.

I love a man in a jogger. Oh, yes. And then there was like this this adorable giggler helping him shop. And I was like, "Dez, do you want me to help you pick things?" He's like, "I got this." I'm like, "Okay." So, I looked at the giggler and I was like, "You got this for me?" And he was like, "Don't worry, babe." So, he like held his hand through the whole thing. And Dez has naturally like a good sense of style. He just got stuck in this like I wear tuxedos on stage. So if you look at his most recent videos, he's wearing the best Lululemon Lululemon bomber jacket.

People have been commenting like, "Dez, you look so good." Da da da. And I He's gonna if he hears this, he's going to be like, you know, this is all me.

I was working hard in the background. You were putting I'm gardening. I'm gardening. Finally, it's become a flower. So, I think I'm I'm similar to you, just less like to his face.

Yeah. But and also he does ask my opinion about stuff and he can tell when I don't like love something and he'll take it into consideration.

The only thing that stops me from doing that sometimes with boyfriends is because I'm like, "This is like a little sinister." In my head, I'm like, I'm obviously getting out of here at some point. Um, and the fact that you're going to take this on with you when I gave you this like

confidence annoys me. Yep. You know, where I'm like I almost don't want to teach you all my tricks because you're going to act like they are yours, which I've seen happen so many times. Like

you also don't want him to use it against other women in the future to trick them that he's a kind of guy that he isn't just cuz he's wearing that kind of shirt that you put him in. I don't know what you just said, but I freaking concur.

I had an embarrassing plane moment. What happened? Oh my god. I was flying Alaska.

Flying Alaska out of Seattle. Alaska is like very popular. No way. And it was when all the flights were getting cancelled. So I booked an Alaska flight and I felt like so good. I'm going to get

so you to be like flying in the eye of the storm. Yeah. And I'm like, "Give me a [ __ ] I find a ILC and I'm in." So I go to the lady at the desk, the security, and she's like, "We don't have you down for this flight. Did it get cancelceled?" And I'm like, "I don't know. I didn't get notified." I'm like, "Here's my ticket. I have a ticket." And she's like, "It's not coming up in my system."

What? 30 minutes until boarding, right? So I have to walk all the way to the Alaska desk. It's chaos. And I'm waiting in a line. And you know when like you're like, I'm going to miss this flight. Find another lady who's just walking around and I'm like, I have a I have a ticket. I don't know why I can't get on.

I've cried at Newark before. The two times I cry are sports documentaries and airplane airport cuz in that moment you feel like people are sabotaging you. You're like I have a ticket. She didn't let me in.

I almost missed my flight to Fiji and I was there like 3 hours prior just because I couldn't find the gate.

Why am I feel like I'm so strong dealing with adversity? Like anything can happen to me and I'm like I'll overcome this. But like one thing goes wrong at the airport and I'm like I'm never going to see my mom again. No one's around. No one works at the airport.

They have this thing where at some point they're just like, "Yeah, you can't get on." Like there's there's bigger rules there.

There are times where they're like, "This is actually above my pay grade, so I have no idea."

They're always like, "Yeah, they're like, I want to help you, but I can't." Computer says no. Like that's what they they're always like you no, you're on

That's like the time my Teresa the website blocked me from ever ordering from there. And I and they said, "Sorry, you're in the system that you can't order from here." And so I got on the internet immediately.

You have amazing taste. In their DMs and I'm like, why can't I order from there? Like I've never even returned something to you guys. They're like, "Sorry, sometimes it just randomly goes in. Our name will go in the system and it gets blocked." And I'm like, "Okay, can you go in the system and unblock it?" And they're like, "No." And I'm like, "But you're the system.

You're the system." Anyway, I can order from there now. It lasted like 6 months.

Um, so I this lady walks me back to the same security and she's like, "Let's try it again." And I'm like, "This is not going to work." It's like 10 minutes till boarding and suddenly it works

and I'm like, "So, was I going to miss the flight cuz of someone's system?" Anyway, I digress. I get on and I have like 30 minutes and I'm like, "You know what I'm going to do?

I'm trying to cancel a health insurance to go to a new health insurance cuz as you guys know, we're

when you have your There's a lot of health insurance in the burner home. Also, we like Yeah, we have to pay for we have to find our own insurance. I don't know actually. I don't know.

We have to get it. We have to have it. you have to pay for it. So, I call and I'm like, I have to cancel. And they were like, oh, you can't cancel through us. You have to cancel through New York State of Health. And I was like, okay, call New York State of Health.

Oh, you're doing this while on the plane. On the plane. Cuz you know when like you're like

if I do if I do it on the plane, it's like productive where like if I do it during my free time, I'm like, this is ruining my life.

Yeah. So, I'm like I'm already crying at the airport. I might as well just double down. Wait, I think the same way. I'm going to be doing something miserable. Why not add

pile it on? Pile it on, babe. Anytime someone's like, "Do you want to do that meeting, too?" I'm like, "You know what? Add it to that day cuz I'm going to want to kill myself all day."

No, it's it's like staying up late where it's like, "It's already 2:00 a.m. What's 3:00 a.m.?"

Wait, people don't talk about that. And they're like, "Oh, you have to go to the small business person." I say, "Great." They send me to her. She goes, "We don't have your you in our system. You have to go to our individual people." I'm like, you know when you finally speak up and you're like, by the way, like I have an ex put to like four different people. Are you sure? They're like, I'm sure. You're back to the original person. I'm losing my mind and finally they're like, we can't find you in our system. So, like it's it's like when you put in your password and it doesn't work and then you

you try to do a new password and they're like that password is the old password. That's literally I'm like, "Guys, clearly I have it because I'm getting charged every month. I want to get out of it." So, I finally just hang up because we're about to take off. And the guy next to me is like,

"Sorry about that. No way." And I was like, "I am so sorry." Because I was trying to speak low, but he's like, "Health insurance is a [ __ ] right?" And I'm like, "I'm so sorry you just heard me in my darkest hour. Like, I never want anyone to hear me on a customer service call with health insurance. Like, I am depleted. I am beaten down. I have no belief in myself or the world." And then we ended up kind of bonding. And what I love about when men talk to me at the airport, they don't ask you questions about themselves.

What do you mean? Like, you know, sometimes you get stuck in like a conversation with like a random mom and she's, you know, where you from, what is and it's nice, but you're tired. This man starts talking to me and I'm like, "Oh no, I'm going to have to get into a conversation."

Talked about himself for 10 minutes and then left me alone. I said, "Men are amazing."

That's some of my best dates. I take I take back everything I said about men. He started talking about his job. Never asked me who I did once. never asked me what I did once and for the first time I was like thank god it's a man because I was not in the mood to get into it

cuz a woman would have been like what are you doing because they're like maybe I could help

100% this man talked at me for 10 minutes and I said I'd rather be on the phone with customer service but this is fine

and you were thankful grateful their lack of interest he probably was like there's no way this girl has a job I just heard her trying to cancel health insurance there's no way she's capable of anything he was like bragging to me about his job too I was like, "Okay." He also asked me what to do in New York City. I blanked. What do you tell people,

Hannah? I blanked. I literally People will snowstorm. I was like, "Stay inside."

Girls will always DM me like, "What's a fun place for me to go to my for my birthday?" I'm like, "I don't know. I haven't known a fun place in 5 years."

I'm a girl. Normally, I'd be like, "Okay, like go thrifting in the Lower East Side. Walk around Tribeca, Soho, West Village." I said that to him and he was like, "Okay." He's like a 40-year-old like engineer. No, I'm so bad. And if anyone ever asks me that, like in my real life, I'm like, "Why don't you text my friend blah blah blah blah blah?" Like, she always knows.

Do you have a restaurant that you recommend? No, there's too many. There's so I mean, yes, my favorite restaurant of all time in New York City is Bar Pity, but that's not a restaurant you're like getting dressed up and like going. That's just

I don't know. Like you can go and sit you can wear sweats. Also, what's fun about New York is when you're like walking around, you get starving, and you pop into a place

that you've literally never seen of or heard of, opened up yesterday. But what I say, what I like to say about New York is that cuz there's so many places, it's so competitive that if it lasts more than a year, like it's good. Well,

I've been to a lot of really horrible places that are just like night life places that you're that I've gone back to in my 30s and I've been like,

"How did you guys stay open?" Like, "This is disgusting." Cuz it's all vibes and aura.

Also, everything now, I feel like every new restaurant is like, "We do bar food, but in a cool way." And I'm like, "Just shut up. Just give me a regular burger, you freak."

Hot take. Cuz I've I in my older years, I've had more of these like dinner meeting things, you know, like events event. Well, but it's like you go to the table and it's like these aren't your best friends. These are like co-workers.

You do way more of those than I do. I shouldn't because I go to dinner. I'm hungry. Yeah,

it's a dinner. I don't care if there's people that it's workrelated. It's a [ __ ] dinner. And they love to play dumb like they've never eaten dinner before and been like, "Should we just share some things,

you know? Like my anxiety works in such mysterious ways." Yeah. You're never hungry during these things.

I could be hungry all day and know I'm going to dinner at 7:00 p.m. Right when I sit down at that table, I'm magically anozumpic. I'm like, I actually haven't thought about a carb in two weeks. Like there's something in me that I physically cannot eat. And there are so many times where I've gone out to dinner like and been like I'm just going to wrap it up and eat it at home.

Well, that's why I get so when we did reality TV, if you rewind to the dinner portion,

I'm stress eating. I'm shoving my face. And I'm also like if I'm chewing, I don't have to come with a fast comeback. You know what I mean? You're

You haven't touched your noki? No. I like can't haven't touched it. I don't know why.

But you let me eat it, which is why. And once I have an alcoholic beverage, that's it. Then all then I'm like, "No, I can't eat. Just get me another drink."

And you're also like a little nauseous. Well, my baseline is always a little nauseous.

You are a little nauseous at all times. So, yeah, people will do this. Let's share. And I'm like, first of all, sharing is intimate. Like, I barely share with my husband and now I'm I have to like

find the social norms of sharing food with strangers. So, and and I'm very aware of like not being rude, but I'm also aware that I'm [ __ ] starving. and we're all just talking. So, I'm the person that's like, "Are you guys eating that artich choke in front of you or like

No, there are times where I'm like, "Yeah, we'll do it for the table, but get two orders cuz this one's mine." Like, I'm eating all of what's on this one.

And I love going off with apps. Order a ton of apps. But in terms of my dinner,

Yeah. And I know if people like, I don't know what I want, that's a you problem.

No, I we're very compatible to go out to dinner because I don't eat. You've eaten yours and then some of mine. I and we're great.

I hate when someone is not free with offering their food. That's the thing. We'll share.

But once I know, have you shared with me? Well, cuz you can't keep up. I'll look over to have a bite and it's all gone. I'm like, how did you even do that?

So, on the road with Ally, she likes to like ask what I'm ordering from room service. You're so jealous right now. Look at your face.

Yeah, I am. You wouldn't have been jealous this last night. No, because you want to know you guys like get ready and you go out to dinner. Never once is proposing that day. That was one off day.

No, I feel like you were dressed twice. I saw you. Paige was mad that I wore makeup going out to date with Ally once.

Oh, because I'm just like when have we ever It was Aspen. Like that would been disrespectful if I show up to dinner the way.

And you were staying at that hotel. Yes. There was like nuances to it. I would never just put makeup on for dinner. That's [ __ ] insane.

There were nuances. There were nuances. But you were mad. You normalize what you dress up for.

Normalize people not knowing the whole story and you not explaining it to them to them. Just being like there are nuances.

Context is important. You wouldn't get the nuances. Context is important and I'm not explaining it to you.

Final thing. I want to discuss traders. Okay. Can you not go off about Colton this time?

I don't know. Even though all your points are 100% valid. I was just thinking about me and you on traders and how I don't understand the strategy.

There is none. Because this is the thing. If you really wanted me to [ __ ] find a traitor, which by the way, I would be a faithful and I'd be a traitor killer. And I would sit there and instead of just like everyone just looking at each other being like, "Where are you from?" looking at each other. I go, "No, we're all going around. Tell me your name, your sign, and why you're not a traitor." Like, put people under the [ __ ] light. You know, like everyone's too polite about it. I want to be like, "Explain yourself and don't blink when you do it. Look me in the eye." Like, I want people being challenged.

My thing is, because we're from reality TV, it's hard for me, even with like Dancing with the Stars, it's hard for me to be like, "Oh, yeah, that's 100% what happened and all those people are safe." Like, in my head,

you think it's rigged? Yes. Yeah. In my head, there's a producer that went up and said, "You're picking so and so. Everyone will follow you. We've also told this person to pick them."

Well, also when you see in Traders where it starts with like one person being like, "Is it Porsche?" And then the next second everyone's like, "It's [ __ ] Porsche."

Okay, but then on the other side of the coin in my head, I'm a producer. I don't want Porsche leaving that early because she's such good TV. So then, but they did have Lisa Rena. So, it's like,

yes, they had explosive good TV, but I just can't like Donna Kelsey apparently cuz I was posting like that I was sobbing. Like, Donna Kelsey made me emotional just her being like, I want to be here longer, but whatever. And then people were like, "You dumbass." Like, clearly she agreed to do one episode.

Yes. I was dumb. I was like, "Why would you pull the nice old lady off?" And then they played it that everyone was just like, "Donna, you're a traitor." They made her a traitor. Like, everyone knew. It was so fake.

That was like she loved the show. She wanted to be on it, but they were like, "Hey, you can't actually do this."

Taylor Swift was also probably like, "Let's not like No, she probably in the van immediately. They were like, "So, what's Taylor like?"

Yeah, that's also like so crazy. But yeah, it was definitely like she had a one episode contract.

I would never let my mom go on a reality TV show even though I did before. Like it would

That's a If they made one [ __ ] thing look bad, I would lose it. I would lose. Imagine your mom. I mean, horrible. I mean, we could imagine it, but the whole time I was like, leave.

There were so many times where like Summerhouse wanted to film certain things with my family and like my mom was like, "No,

the biggest biggest regret I have is first season putting my family on cuz I didn't know." Final thought about my dad. I'm, you know, doing standup comedy, having fun, and there's always the occasional man that'll be like, "Does your dad know you say that stuff on stage? like how do your parents feel? And I'm always like I am my dad.

I'm my dad. Like I'm just being my dad. I'm half 50%'s my dad and that what you're seeing on stage is my dad. I've said actual jokes that he said on stage

and now I come from like a little bit more of like a conservative going to say a little

more conservative parents in terms of like you don't talk about that, you don't say that, blah blah blah. And even people will say to my dad like, "Wow, she really and my dad will go right like "Oh really?"

They don't say that to the male comics. No. Or Yeah. And it's even like reality TV. It's like there was like a time where people were like, "So, Paige does Only Fans." And my my dad was like, "No." You know,

but anyhoo, we love you guys. Thank you so much for giggling with us. And I think our Netflix thing with Mindy Kaling and Kate Hudson

ticket and Brenda Song, you can buy tickets. It might be sold out, but double check. Okay, Netflix is a joke festival. We love you guys. Bye.

Questions about this episode

Who speaks in "Giggling about cortisol, choking, and bidets with Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo"?

Hannah Berner (Host), Paige DeSorbo (Guest).

What is "Giggling about cortisol, choking, and bidets with Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo" about?

Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo discuss their chaotic lives, touching on topics like personal grievances about public restroom behavior, the challenges of maintaining a busy schedule, and light-hearted banter about hair color and personal appearances. Their playful, humorous dialogue reflects on everyday experiences, blending comedy with relatable frustrations.

What is mentioned in this Giggly Squad episode?

11 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including Giggly Squad, Harry Styles, Khloe Kardashian, Lululemon, Squatty Potty, Donna Kelsey. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "Giggling about cortisol, choking, and bidets with Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo"?

The episode runs 54 min; the transcript is about 11,711 words in 324 timestamped sections.

More from Giggly Squad

About this transcript: the episode's spoken words as captioned on YouTube, split into timestamped sections. Reclip.Me locates every person, work and idea in the text, keeps the time it is first named, and quotes the words around it verbatim. Last updated January 30, 2026.