Manifest This, A*sholes

What this episode is about

The content addresses frustrations regarding the intrusive advertisements experienced by paid subscribers of news services and magazines, emphasizing the annoyance of deceptive pop-ups that lead users to unintended sites. It also touches on the importance of supporting quality journalism while advocating for a better user experience online.

Key takeaways

• Escalator etiquette: Don't be the 'human traffic cone' holding everyone up at 30,000 feet.
• Paying for news shouldn’t come with pop-up ads; that’s like ordering a meal and getting a side of chaos.
• Airports are the ultimate test of patience; it's a wonder if anyone departs without a sarcastic remark.
• In New York, honesty is policy—saving time is more important than being polite. Sorry, not sorry!
• Lack of self-awareness on escalators is akin to bringing a piñata to a quiet library—totally disruptive!

Who speaks in this episode?

• Jennifer Welch (Host) · 44 min speaking
• Kylie (Guest) · 26 min speaking
• Calpen (Guest) · 18 min speaking

What is discussed, and when

1. 0:00 – 10:00: IHIP News
2. 20:00 – 30:00: Cal Penn, IHIP News
3. 30:00 – 40:00: Honey Love, Lola Blanket, Center Stage
4. 40:00 – 50:00: Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle, Mississippi Masala, Harold and Kumar, Go to White Castle, Mera Nyer
5. 50:00 – 1:00:00: ASPCA Pet Health Insurance Program
6. 1:20:00 – 1:28:03: Bill Nye, iHeart, Center Stage, IHIP News

Notable quotes from "Manifest This, A*sholes"

• Oh that's the other day we were filming and I was doing like a we were filming an IHIP news and you do it and I always chuckle every time you do it because I have certain…

  about IHIP News · at 9:32

• [ __ ] Actor, writer, producer, and a podcast host overachiever. The name of his podcast is Here we go again. Let's welcome to I've had it, Cal Penn. A Christmas miracle has…

  about Cal Penn · at 29:57

• Stretch. The kind of quality that instantly, and I mean instantly, feels gift worthy. Listener, for a limited time, our listeners can get 40% off select Lola Blanket products…

  about Lola Blanket · at 32:07

• Big one for me. It's the only bra I don't want to rip off immediately when I get home. Listener, treat yourself to the most advanced bras and shapewear on the market. Use our exclusive link to save 20% off Honeylove at honeylove.com/hhatit.

  about Honey Love · at 33:06

• His mom is a wonderful Academy nominated film director named Mera Nyer. and when I was a kid, one of the first movies of hers that I saw was called Mississippi Masala, which…

  about Mississippi Masala · at 46:29

• Movie, Harold and Kumar, Go to White Castle. And for the last three months, he and his best friend, Sam, have been begging me to audition you for the lead in my independent…

  about Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle · at 47:28

• And now a quick message from today's sponsor, the ASPCA Pet Health Insurance Program. Listeners, you know that my pets are a part of my family. They are my children, my spouses, my everything.

  about ASPCA · at 59:33

• Something is and here's why it'll continue to be shitty. So for example, our first episode was Bill Nye.

  about Bill Nye · at 1:22:32

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

People

• Cal Penn — Person · Main guest · 1 mention · first at 29:49
  Featured interview guest; discusses personal grievances (manifesting, tipping), politics, and his podcast, plus his relationship with NYC Mayor Zohran Mamdani.
• Meera Nair — Person · Referenced filmmaker; connection point in guest’s origin story · 2 mentions
  Cal Penn credits her as a catalyst for his acting career; he describes writing her a letter to get an audition and being cast in her film; also identified as “Zoron’s” mother.
  His mom is a wonderful Academy nominated film director named Meera Nair.
• Bill Nye — Person · Referenced expert / notable guest on Cal Penn’s podcast · 1 mention · first at 1:22:35
  Cited as a guest on Cal Penn’s show to discuss the space race and the shift from national competition to billionaire/private competition in space exploration.
• Mera Nyer — Person · 1 mention · first at 46:35
  His mom is a wonderful Academy nominated film director named Mera Nyer. and when I was a kid, one of the first movies of hers that I saw was called Mississippi Masala, which…
• Zoron — Person · 1 mention

Books & papers

• Mississippi Masala — Book · 1 mention · first at 46:40
  Mera Nyer. and when I was a kid, one of the first movies of hers that I saw was called Mississippi Masala, which was incidentally one of Denzel Washington's first movies. and…
• The Namesake — Book · 1 mention · first at 46:54
  Can do, too. So, she was one of those people for me when I was a kid. And then cut to this movie called The Namesake that she was directing that I for whatever could not get an audition for this movie. My agent couldn't get me in.
• Harold and Kumar, Go to White Castle — Book · 1 mention · first at 47:28
  Read your letter and my 14-year-old son, Zoron, is a huge fan of your stoner movie, Harold and Kumar, Go to White Castle. And for the last three months, he and his best friend…

Companies & orgs

• iHeart — Company · Distributor · 1 mention · first at 1:22:03
  Mentioned as the distributor of Cal Penn's podcast.
  It's distributed by iHeart and it's available on the iHeart Radio app or wherever you listen to your podcasts.
• ASPCA Pet Health Insurance Program — Company · 1 mention · first at 59:36
  And now a quick message from today's sponsor, the ASPCA Pet Health Insurance Program. Listeners, you know that my pets are a part of my family. They are my children, my spouses, my everything.

Places & events

• Center Stage — Place · 2 mentions · first at 30:39
  So, we added an additional day. Ticket sales were getting about close to halfway. February 1st, center stage in Atlanta. And it is also a matinea because we are going to…

Media & podcasts

• Mississippi Masala — Media · Referenced work · 1 mention · first at 46:40
  Mentioned in the context of Cal Penn's early influences in acting.
• Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle — Media · Referenced work · 1 mention · first at 47:28
  Mentioned in the context of Cal Penn's acting career and its impact.

Sponsors

• Lola Blanket — Product · Sponsor · 2 mentions · first at 31:36
  Advertised as a luxurious and cozy blanket option during the podcast.
• Honey Love — Product · Sponsor · 2 mentions · first at 32:47
  Promoted as a comfortable and supportive bra option during the podcast.
• ASPCA — Company · Sponsor · 2 mentions
  Mentioned as a sponsor of the podcast, promoting pet health insurance.
• IHIP News — Sponsor · 3 mentions · first at 9:38

Full transcript with timestamps

0:03 So, we supposed to start the podcast. Ready? One, two, three. Patriots, gatriots, they riots, black triots, brown, brown triots. Sorry, I swear to God, you guys, I'm sober. All of the fascist, Nazi, MAGA, psychopaths can do what? Pumps. [ __ ] off.

0:28 That's a good one. That's a good one. A long It's a long [ __ ] off because I really want them to [ __ ] all the way off.

0:34 How great would it be if there was a trend that started with people like you know how they're watch legal observers to the ice people if they just started like in all pump style just like doing their arms like an eagle going [ __ ] off [ __ ] off [ __ ] off.

0:49 Yeah. And we could make it. Yes. I would love it. Pumps. What have you had it with

0:54 Kate? What I've had it with is when you are a subscribing paid member to a news service or a a magazine and you've paid the money and then they pop up ads like you push down like you scroll up to read the rest of the article and an ad pops up and you have to hit the X mark which I always invariably end up going on to the page of that I'm the advertisement but My whole thing is if I hadn't paid for a subscription, I completely get it. Like that's how they make money. That's how they stay flat. I'm in. But I've paid for this subscription. And now instead of just having the normal ads, you have the trick suck ads where you think you're pushing X to get out, but really you're going to their site. So I've had it with that. I've [ __ ] had it.

1:50 They're double dipping. It's a total double dip. I will say this, I agree with you. The popups, the constant unsolicited advertisements and when you're on a page, you're these things are popping up without your consent,

2:06 right? You know, it it's ruining the scrolling experience. And so I oppose that. Now, when it comes to like certain articles, there were these journalists, real journalists have done like incredible investigative journalism. In order for these journalists and these nonfascist media outlets to make money, they have to put stories behind a payw wall, right?

2:28 Totally on board with that. I get that. Even if there's an ad in the payw wall, if they need to pay these journalists, keep the lights on. I get that. I think the rub are these unauthorized popups.

2:46 Yep. Agree. I mean, I do not mind paying it, but I do not like having to pay it and the popup.

2:55 Right. But you're right. I have I'm happy to pay for independent journalism because the mainstream media is just absolutely collapsed in every area. Most of them, not all, but quite a few. Um, all right. Let me tell you what I've had it with. This has happened to me a couple of times at the airport. The airport, as we all know, is the epicenter of just worldclass grievances and [ __ ] This happened to me twice recently. I was ascending on an escalator,

3:26 okay? And the escalators were very crowded. The person in front of me when they get to the top of the escalator simply steps off of the moving step that goes in and then holds and stays in place. no walking

3:42 creating a domino effect of me walking backwards, having to take steps backwards. The person behind me thinks I'm an [ __ ]

3:51 right? And and and I'm like, "Hey, dude, you got to go. You got to move." And so it happened once. I'm like, "You got move out of the way. We're all coming up." Well, the second time it happened, I have my dogs with me and they're very like they know when we get to the top. I say, "Ready, one, two, three, jump." And they both jump over and they're I mean just incredible. I mean just really incredible kines, okay? Despite like incredible personalities, you know, Mr. and Mrs. congeniality, Mr. Photogenic,

4:23 megawatt personality, the whole nine. They're really like they behave very well. So I'm gearing up the dogs and I'm like ready. And they're I mean and they're like, you know, they're ready to go. I'm like 1 2 3 jump. And then they bang right into the heels of this woman who's just on her phone.

4:40 Oh, you I was like, you've got to move. Like, you have all of these people coming up. And I'll tell you one thing, I'm really digging about New York culture versus Oklahoma City culture is you can say very sincerely, "What are you doing, man? You got to move out of the way." And that's not considered rude in New York. It is a realitybased statement that is appropriate to the situation. In Oklahoma, if somebody did that, they would it would be considered rude. And so, if I were in Oklahoma, I have to go, I'm sorry, you need to you I'd have to like tiptoe around. This person is the norm violator. This person is the one clogging the escalator. So whatever statement is ejected at them is uh projected at them is warranted because they're creating an obstacle endangering the lives of other human beings at the airport endangering the lives of people's pets and all around just being narcissistic selfish

5:44 [ __ ] And I this the the lack of escalator etiquette is just something that I could go on and on about for quite some time. Well, I'll tell you what, everything kind of always boils down to the lack of selfawareness. When people are on escalators, there's a higher duty of care because you're going up and people are behind you. But your duty of care, you you can't hurt everybody. If you just want to stop yourself, that's fine. But the stopping on the phone, I I I see it all the time. I see it in airports primarily where you're walking and somebody like stops to check their flight or a text or something and it's like people are moving. An airport is not a, you know, stop and smell the roses type place.

6:33 It's a we're going from point A to point B. We don't need a lot of gawking and stopping and reading your [ __ ] phone. And I will say I have caught myself doing it before and I immediately am like, "Oh my gosh, I got to stop." You know, if a text comes in and I'm looking at it, I'm very so I know that it's really easy to do. And so I really try to stop step out of it. But here's the thing. The older I get, the more New York I become because I just don't have time to fluff people over stupid [ __ ] Especially if I don't know them, I'm never going to see them again. I don't care if you think I'm nice. I don't care if you think I'm a [ __ ] I just don't care. Just shut the [ __ ] up. Move on. We're not doing this.

7:15 Yes. Airport hallways should be treated like a roadway. A highway. Yeah. If you're on the highway, you don't stop in the middle of the road to check your phone, to check your Instagram notification, to take a phone call. You don't do that. You pull over to the side or you exit. The same thing needs to be with all walkways, staircase ways, the flat moving walkways in airports. They are active traffic zones. If you wish to cease movement, you need to pull over to the side much like you would in a car. And if you don't pull over to the side, expect to be confronted with behavior that some may call [ __ ] And that cuntiness is warranted. That is when you are a [ __ ] for good, a [ __ ] for order, a [ __ ] for civility in the airport. And sometimes cuntiness needs to be weaponized to whip people into shape.

8:16 and these lolly gaggers in the airport and the absolute morons, I mean stupid morons that stop after they step off of an escalator and don't have the deduction skills to play the tape through if I stepped off. Somebody after me, considering this is a very busy airport,

8:38 is probably going to step off as well. You're not the only mfer on the escalator. Yeah, people are just the longer I live, the more I think people are stupid. Especially now in this 202026, I feel like I guess I just didn't know that such a large percentage of the US population is so dumb. I I you just I guess you just assume that everybody, you know, it's average intelligent, maybe a little below, maybe a little above. You don't just think abject [ __ ] dumb shits and you're just seeing it more and more.

9:15 What year is it again? 2026. What' I say? 2026. No. What' I say? I always say, but now

9:26 people are just People are just so stupid especially in this year 2020. Oh that's

9:36 the other day we were filming and I was doing like a we were filming an IHIP news and you do it and I always chuckle every time you do it because I have certain things that I say wrong and I'm completely oblivious to it. But that's that's your hiccup. And so I have all of these like in in 2024 the stats of the you know government or polling was X and I have to go through all these years and as I'm doing like don't do what Pumps does and it gets in my head and then I start doing it and you pick up that I start doing what you do and then you start giggling and so you know what I think that it can be 202026 if you want it to be pumps.

10:14 Yeah, it's it's gone a long time. Okay, I have to tell you what happened to me yesterday. So, I went to our our little sandwich shop that we always go to.

10:22 Oh, yeah. I love that place. Drove through. Order my sandwich. They have a drive-thru.

10:27 Yeah, they have a drive-thru. Ordered my sandwich. No tomatoes like I always do. I get my sandwich. I pull over and park so that I can unwrap it and make sure my lap doesn't get stuff on it. And I realize the only thing in it are cucumbers and lettuce. So, I whip back around. I go through the drive-thru and said, "Hey, I just ordered a number 11, but I just got a lettuce and uh cucumber." And he's like, "Oh, yeah. We'll get that made for you." And then I just finished a book, so I was getting a new book. So the guy hands me the sandwich, and he goes, "I asked you three times if you wanted a number three, and you said yes. So I think you need to listen better."

11:09 Good for him. So you ordered the cucumber sandwich? He says I did, but I know I didn't. I always order the same thing. And I was kind of not paying attention. And I looked at him. I go, "What'd you say?" And he was like, "I asked you three times and you said yes." And so you need to listen better. And I just looked at him and I wish I would have said, "Fuck off, but I just moved to my car." But yeah, I got the right sandwich.

11:36 Yeah, he gave me the right sandwich. But then and I kind of been nauseous since then. I'm wondering if he spit in it or something. Not like full grade vomiting, but just not quite right. And I'm thinking the Karen backfire. The Karen backfired.

11:51 Scolded. I got scolded. See, okay, here's the thing. I hate that you got scolded, but I have been with you multiple times when you And Kylie, jump in here really quick. Here's Kylie. Welcome to I've had him. Jennifer's head beaver in charge. Kylie, we're all here.

12:10 We're all here. All right. Here's the thing. We have been having conversations before the three of us where Kylie and I are completely on the same page and you're in the year 202026. It's true. Always has been that way. And so I have to say to the sandwich shop owner because they run they're they're I've been to that sandwich shop multiple times with you. They've never gotten my order wrong.

12:38 No, they have. They they are efficient. They are nice. I feel like it's a great work environment because every day you go in, if you eat inside, it's a different genre of music. Like sometimes it's like metal and then another day it's like disco and then another day it's like hiphop. And all of these music genres, if you look at the people behind the sandwich counter, you can tell it kind of matches each person. And so I even said to Pumps one day, I feel like they let the employees play their music each day and I really like the sandwich shop cuz Pumps and I both love sandwiches.

13:16 So here's what I have to say. I do think that the notion that the customer is always right has been an enabling breeding grounds of Karenism. And I I'm glad you got the correct sandwich, but being your friend for 25 years, I do think you probably ordered the cucumber sandwich because I've witnessed these types of things a multitude of times.

13:43 Yeah, I mean, I'm certainly not going to deny I thought I did, but you never know. But yeah, I sometimes I make no sense. Pumps, you've totally [ __ ] Seth and I up because of the 202026. He texted me yesterday and was like, "Hey, Pumps said 202026 in an ad," which I'm always listening for it. And I literally didn't catch it cuz it sounded right to me. And I went back and I was like, "She said it right."

14:10 That's the thing to me. Like now I'm like, now I'm there, you know? Like I had clarity about how to say the years and now I'm I'm in like the long co brain fog punch 2020 26 million

14:28 America. [ __ ] it. That's what I think. [ __ ] it. That's what I I think you just I think you continue doing it. I don't think our listeners care and I think they quite frankly find it endearing.

14:38 Find it quite charming. I know. I do. I think they do. All right, Kylie. What is going on on the worldwide web regarding the world's top DEI podcast?

14:52 I have some top reviews. This one is five stars. Says, "If you don't like this podcast, you're a fat ass." And Disco Maddie writes, "It doesn't matter if you are a size zero."

15:06 Yes, that's exactly right, Disco Maddie. That's exactly right. When I call you a fat ass, it has nothing to do with your ass. It's just that you're a fat ass because that's just a good satisfying. It's satisfying. Like when you go, "Fuck it. I'm not doing it." It just doesn't feel good as good to say. I think I'm going to stop it. [ __ ] it. Feels profoundly more satisfying. I love Disco Maddie for describing perfectly your ideology about fat ass. She just and it was so she nailed it in such a simple way. Way better than I ever have.

15:44 Okay, this one has a beef with you, Jen. It's titled Monsters. It's five stars. And Nyx writes, "I was in the process of leaving a fivestar review when I discovered Jen is in fact a psychopath because only a psychopath leaves their cell phone in their car and raw dogs a workout. I personally do not have the maturity or the constitution to directly confront the grunting and farting and shing from fellow gym patrons sans sound barrier. I hope you make lots of eye contact while you're raw dogging.

16:16 Okay, Nyx 9479. Nyx 9479. I just want to say number one, thank you for calling me a psychopath. I appreciate that and I and I mean that sincerely because the last thing I want to be in this Nazi fascist country that we live in is a non-csychopathic fighter. Secondly, um the whole gym thing like in the phones situation at the gyms are horrific. The grunters that you were talking about, I'm one of them. So I'm like and here I here's the deal. I go to this gym in New York, you guys, and it is all these hot gay men everywhere. So, of course, I'm on cloud nine because that is like my happy place being surrounded by gay men. Like, takes me back to college. All of my best adult friends, gay men. And so, I look around and and you know, gay men are groomed.

17:13 They have on great outfits. They have great bodies. And this little trainer of mine, she's this little young whippers snapper. She comes across as super friendly and super cenial, but she is like a diabolical psychopath that has like she just rigorously trains me and she's like she'll stack on more weights and I'm like grunting. I'm like or I'm like [ __ ] my life and I look around and I see everybody with the earbuds in and I support the earbuds but there is a a nuance to my psychopathy. If you have your phone with you so that you can hear something, no problem.

17:52 Here's my [ __ ] problem. You got some [ __ ] some hot gay guy, of course, doing, let's say, leg presses. And so, he's on the machine bog guarding the machine, and then he's going to take a 30 second to 60 second break. Next thing you know, he's on Instagram. Next thing you know, he's like, "Well, who is this [ __ ] tagged here?" Next thing you know, who follows? And then we're down a rabbit hole that is 10 minutes, which I relate to because I do the same [ __ ] right? Instagram all the time, which is why I don't get on social media in the gym. And if that means I am sanctimonious or I am on the moral high ground or I am a Serena Williams style grunting hypocrite, I will own it. I will bask in it. I will bathe in it. But it is the trying to do two things that shouldn't be done at the same time. You cannot do leg presses and do reconnaissance on Instagram in between leg presses because you never know once

18:50 you start a reconnaissance mission on social media to figure out who this [ __ ] is, who her friends are. Do they follow anybody, any of the Trumps, and you're trying to get the deep dark bottom of something. I relate to this. I enjoy this. It's a hobby of mine. I do not do Instagram reconnaissance missions in between leg presses or bicep curls.

19:13 Yeah. And I really Oh, I just want to say there's no one that does a reconnaissance like Miss Welch. I mean, if you

19:20 I'm excellent at it. If you need a mission accomplished in the reconnaissance world, she's your gal. And she is focused. And I don't even think

19:29 I think you have too high of a standard that you would even start that at the gym because your standards are so strict.

19:37 Thank you, pumps. And the crosscontamination of it would seem to cheapen the reconnaissance mission. Absolutely.

19:43 It would be such such a flippant thing to do in between bicep curls that I'm going to conduct this, you know, very important investigation in the middle of the gym when somebody's waiting on the leg press machine, you know, like I I wouldn't cheapen the uh toxic absolutely none of my business reconnaissance mission that I'm on. would keep it pure and um dignified,

20:11 right, in its toxicity. Yes, I would keep it keep it toxically pure. That's right.

20:19 No crosscontamination. All right, Kylie, what else? Okay, I've got a very interesting news story. This says in Denmark, offices banned small talk for a week. Burnout rates dropped to record lows. Finally.

20:35 Mhm. One, it began when this HR director, Sophie, noticed her team seemed exhausted by noon. She said they weren't overworked. They were overstimulated. Endless chatter, fake smiles, yada yada. The first two days that she set this up were uncomfortable. People didn't know what to do. They reached for words like caffeine. But by midweek, the office grew quiet, calm, even focused. Productivity rose 23%. Absenteeism dropped and employees started taking breaks alone. It felt weirdly peaceful. One analyst said like we remembered what concentration feels like.

21:12 Good for her. What a great idea. How innovative. I like it. I I like it, too. I think that um if we didn't have a profession where uh the number one top thing that we have to do is small talk, I would institute the same policy at I've had it podcast and IHip News. Unfortunately, said policy would cause us to go bankrupt and lose our loved, beloved, coveted listener. Yeah, that's right. But here's the thing. Small talk is exhausting. And here's the funny thing is I can have the exact same small talk conversation with because I don't remember it. I don't remember what I said last time. So then I go to if I see somebody again like a week later, all my small talk things have already been used because it's just I just act like it's not happening. I just void it from my mind.

22:06 Even though I know you're going to say you say that you're the worst at it. I know I am. I know. I know. Okay. The last news story I got I also thought was super interesting. It says women over 40 are having more babies than teen moms for the first time ever. And it writes, "Women 40 and older are now giving birth at higher rates than teens for the first time in recorded US history. The trend is linked to delayed marriage, career priorities, IVF advancements, and improved prenatal care.

22:38 I think this is fabulous. I think this is absolutely fabulous." Um, the thing about breeding is particularly on the right, they really think it's their business and the pressure that is put on young couples. Are you you going to get married? And when I talk to like my friends, not friends, but peers, acquaintances in Oklahoma, my oldest son has been with his girlfriend for several years. And they will say, "Do you think they're going to get married? They're 22 years old. It's like the furthest thing from my mind and the furthest thing from their mind. But there's a regional component to this where if you get in the Bible belt states, there's all this pressure on it. All of my New York friends, when I mentioned, oh yeah, my son's in law school. He lives with this girlfriend. They've been together for several years. The not one person has ever followed up with, do you think they're going to get married? And then

23:39 after that in the south it's followed up with are you gonna have kids? Are you gonna have another kid? There's all this pressure that I think comes from conservative spaces. This story like women having it all being able to have a career. And let's face it, when you go Kylie Hut, get your ass back. Get your ass back up here. When they uh when you go through adulthood, your 20s, you're really you think you're hot [ __ ] You're an adult, but you're not. your 30s, all of your inner child [ __ ] all of the trauma comes out. Your 40s, you're kind of starting to getting a little more.

24:14 Honestly, like I think 40 is a much better mental headsp space to have a child than in your 20s. I think it's going to create better parenting. I think that it's like the perfect time to have it. Now, for conservatives, they're going to think, "Oh, this is terrible." Because actually, women are going to go out into workspaces and kick white men's ass with their efficiency. They're less hysterical whining grievance titty baby, oh my god, the way all these MAGA men are. And so, I'm sure that I bet Elon Musk is probably going to tweet something about this or JD Vans. They're probably going to have a heyday about women in their 40s having kids, which I think it's fabulous. I think it's so [ __ ] people in Bible belt states to think of two 22 year olds getting married. That's [ __ ] crazy. It's nuts. Well, it's not outside the norm in Oklahoma for like an 18 and 19 year old got married. I mean, it's not I don't

25:15 hear about it as much, but it it definitely happens. I think that I would have been such a much better parent had I waited because I feel like I was far more competent in my 40s because I was a complete [ __ ] disaster in my 20s and 30s.

25:32 I agree with you. I think probably always, but I think that like Josh and I talk about it all the time, like you know how difficult early parenting is, how hard it is, and the more life experience you have on the planet, the better setup you're going to be. I think delaying parenthood, quote unquote, planning parenthood, donate to Planned Parenthood, is incredibly important because there's just a lot of generational [ __ ] that goes on with straight people and the breeding and the we got to get married so we can have sex. And then they don't know anything about protection and they start popping out all these babies like those what are they called? The duggers. I mean, you know, that's the biggest goddamn [ __ ] show you've ever seen in your life. One of the Duggar guys is like some pedto

26:24 sisters. I mean, it's just a goddamn nightmare. And I just think we need to really, really emphasize as a counterreaction to Elon Musk, who is the world's richest deadbeat dad on the planet, J. D. Vance who has three kids that he will not even stand up for mixed race people in the United States of America. Erica Kirk who appears to not spend any time with her children on the moral high ground lecturing everybody to breed immediately and women give up your careers and breed breed breed. We need to be a huge resistance to that because it it is inherently sexist, misogynistic and will make women women less safe and it causes a lot of generational [ __ ] I mean, if people are getting married for the sole reason to [ __ ] they really have no business getting married. Just go ahead and [ __ ] Get that out of your system, mature, evolve, and then pick your spouse and decide to breed a decade or two later. You don't

27:30 need to do that in your early 20s. It's crazy. Yeah, it's crazy. In my college experience, in my sorority in Oklahoma, a majority of the girls were simply looking for a husband. And all of the ones that married their college boyfriend, I have a few that are two times over divorced already. And I'm 30. Yeah.

27:52 Yeah, it happens. No, there's a whole uh infantilization of women that has taken on a new form where it's like, okay, you have been released enough to go to college and that's not frowned upon, but then when you get to college, I think Charlie Kirk said this, you need to get your MRS degree. M

28:19 and you don't have a lot of schools on the coast, you have women that are going to school to get degrees that want to be boss [ __ ] that want to be badasses. Where all three of us went to school, it's it's not that. It is you're shopping for a husband. You're way more interested in uh you know the who's going to marry who and all of this kind of old school Iron Age [ __ ] And if you just just to remind everybody, the University of Oklahoma is the school that has the student Samantha Flunky, whatever her name is, that wrote a batshit essay like crazy insane Bible thumper psychosis and Turning Point shakes down the University of Oklahoma and she comes out the victor in that so that they could fire the very intelligent, very qualified professor who happened to be trans.

29:17 Yeah, University of Oklahoma is really [ __ ] that situation up. Bad, bad, bad, bad. Because even all the things you said about the essay were true. It was horribly written. Like gram grammatically. I mean, it's just unbelievable that a college student would write that [ __ ] All right, Kylie, you may dismiss. We love you. I hate it when she goes out early when she tries to slink out a little podcast. And that's why I'm like, get your ass back in here. All right, we have a guest that we're super excited about. His name is Cal Penn. He is an actor. He is a writer. He is a producer and a podcast host. Now he's just making us look like [ __ ] Actor, writer, producer, and a podcast host overachiever. The name of his podcast is Here we go again. Let's welcome to I've had it, Cal Penn. A Christmas miracle has taken place. So, we decided to go do a live show in Atlanta on January 31st. And we were for

30:19 sure like, "The ticket sales are going to be lackluster. Nobody's going to become I'll be damned if it didn't sell out in like a couple of days." So, the organizer was like, "You should do another date." And I'm like, "That's a pretty big pretty big ass, pretty big ass for two old broads like us, right?" So, we added an additional day. Ticket sales were getting about close to halfway. February 1st, center stage in Atlanta. And it is also a matinea because we are going to normalize matineese. We are going to normalize a reasonable start time. We're not going to start a show at 8 or 9:00 p.m.

30:55 No. Past bedtime. Wake up the next day feeling hung over, strung out. Why did I hang out with all of these radical leftist anti-fascists? We're not going to do that because we're pro- matinea. We're pro-democracy. We're anti- MAGA. and we're anti-fascist. Come see us. It's going to be so fun. I love getting together at a live show with all of the people. It's such a community. All right, listener. A big part of my life, and this is going to sound like the little things, but it is so important to me, is a great blanket. I love to fluff up on my sofa or in my bed with a really ny just cozy blanket. And that's why I want to share with you the Lola blanket. I chose this gray kind of furry blanket. It's very large. It keeps me so warm. It feels great on the skin.

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33:23 That's honeylove.com/hhatit. After you check out, they're going to ask how you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them that we sent you. Experience the new standard in comfort and support with Honey Love.

33:40 Hi. Hey. How are you? Well, I was great until I read your bio. Actor, writer, producer, and podcast hosts. And then I feel like Pumps and I are just total slacker losers.

33:54 No. No. This is the Wait, you know what's funny about bios? And it's like they take 20 years of your career and it's like five lines. So, it looks like you've done it at the same time consistently for that length of time. And nobody wants to talk about like I remember one of the first talk shows I went on. I think it was um it was like Craig Ferguson or something like that. And I started telling a story about like all the jobs you have to work to save up your gas money to go on auditions. And he cuts me off and he's like, "Nobody wants to talk about that.

34:25 You're on a talk show. Nobody wants to hear that. Tell us the juice about making the movie." And I'm like, "Okay, okay. I understand."

34:34 All right, Calpen. What have you had it with? Um, let me just pull up my list because I made a list.

34:42 I love I love a grievance list. I have a grievance list. I know it makes it makes me sound more grievy. Um,

34:49 the pettier the better. That's that's sort of how I felt about it. Um, and I'll give you the first one.

34:57 Okay. It's um this idea of manifesting something. Oh. And it's usually said with um I think what we all call like Instagram influencer voice. This year I'm manifesting um that that I'm going to I'm putting the energy out there. I'm like guys I think that's called coming up with a plan.

35:23 Right. I think that's right. Or it's the opposite. It's I put the energy out there and I manifested it and nothing happened. like, well, cuz you didn't put it's the plan and then the action behind it, right? So, anyway, so that's like a big pet peeve of mine is like either you're talking about planning or you're talking about luck. It's it's one of the two.

35:45 It's one of our um longtime grievances. There's this woman Oh, is it really? Okay.

35:51 Yeah. There's this woman on Instagram and this was like right when we first started the the uh podcast and I'm like looking at Instagram looking at influencers to like come up with content

36:03 and this woman she has like a Birkin bag and a Rolls-Royce and she pulls up to the plane and her husband has a matching Rolls-Royce and it's this big giant like private plane. I mean like big [ __ ] Gulfream, right? Uh-huh.

36:19 And she writes in the comment section like I manifested this life hash, you know, #ferestream # Birkin # Rolls-Royce. And I just I mean, and I just thought, are you kidding me? And here's here's the problem.

36:36 It it's it's kind of like, okay, I get one narcissistic nut job. I get that, right? Yeah.

36:42 Is this aspirational for people? Because that's the problem. Like, are people doing that? And then all of a sudden they've got a mood board with a golf strip and a Rolls-Royce and zero job.

36:54 This is the thing is that you you hit both of them at the same time. It's like the I'm all for a board of goals and timelines and how I'm going to execute and all of that, but the mood board of energy is not that. And also the the flashing it the flashing it and saying I manifested this implicit in that is that anybody who does not have if they want one a private jet or a Birkin or whatever just didn't do it hard enough.

37:27 Yeah. Right. Like they're the lazy ones. I'm like okay. I think we need a lesson on capitalism. It's kind of like I feel that same way about when people say um we need to pray for the family after a horrific school shooting. They're like we need to pray for the family. The prayers doesn't help. What you need to do is put action into

37:46 gun. You know, it's just like praying with is just not helping anything. If it were, we wouldn't have all these massive school shootings and this continue to go on. So that's what drives me crazy, too. Kind of on the same line.

37:59 Maybe it's all just a coping mechanism. Maybe I mean I just I I think the uh thoughts and prayers crowd.

38:08 Yeah. Um all have a lot in common which is what we say in Oklahoma. All hat no cattle. I mean it's a big performative. We're going to pray and we're going to do all this [ __ ] and we're for family values and we're for life you know we're you know we're we're for all that [ __ ] but then and then they just do the perform like Ted Cruz when he starts talking about praying. Uh, I'm like, there's never been a bigger walking talking advertisement against prayer,

38:35 against men, against Texans, against senators, against husbands, than you, Ted Cruz.

38:44 Ted Cruz, I feel like, doesn't get it. Like, there there are a lot of politicians who I've met who who have walked me through this idea of like they want to endorse another politician or actors. We get this all the time, right? Like someone's like, "Oh, can you help me out on a campaign?" Or the opposite. Please don't help me on this campaign because because your presence would do more harm to this political campaign than good. I don't think Ted Cruz understands that calculus.

39:08 No, he thinks he's he runs around saying, you know, he's got an exploratory committee for the 2028 presidential election. And I always every time I see that, I'm just like, why does he not know everyone hates him? Like universally.

39:22 Yeah. It's unbelievable. Yeah, it's wild. All right, moving along. Let's go to what I think I have on your list of grievances.

39:32 Something pertaining to tips. Yes. So, now tell us about this. Here's what it's not going to be. It's not going to be I agree with this also, but it's not going to be like somebody poured you a glass of hot water, handed you a teaag, swiveled the screen around, and wants two extra dollars. That I I understand the grievance and also that that's like complicated because of the way our minimum wage works in the United States. That said, the grievance that I have is when you get your bill and tips are automatic automatically calculated like it'll say 20% check here, 15 check here, you know, 25 check here. But when you look at it, those numbers have been calculated after taxes.

40:13 Like you don't calculate tips after taxes. It's on the net. It's on the service provided. And I generally I at least I'd like to think of myself as a generous tipper. I think it's important having had service jobs in the past. I know how much you rely on that. But the pet peeve is that that added thing is like it don't tell me it's 25% if it's actually not 25% of what I ordered. If it's 25% of the cuz like I'll tip 25%. But it but it shouldn't actually then be like 32% that I'm tipping

40:48 unless I want to tip 32%. Like just let somebody tip what they want to tip. It's the hood wink.

40:53 It Yes. But it feels icky saying it because again, having had those jobs back in the day and having so many friends in the service industry, I know how many shitty tippers there are.

41:04 I know how many people are just like, "They didn't do much. Here's $2 or the food sucked, so I'm not going to tip." It's like, "All right, things are a lot more complicated than that." But the little pet peeve is the just like just be honest about how it's calculated. I'm with you regarding tipping because I waited tables all through college, uh, bartended and it was a really good job for me. Not only was it good money, but you know, when people did tip well, if I didn't work Sunday morning with the thoughts and prayer crowd, notoriously terrible tippers in the south,

41:35 just had to throw that in there because they're terrible. Horrible. Nobody wanted to work Sunday church because you're not getting tipped.

41:43 Geez, I would have thought the opposite. you know, it prepares you for life. It's so good. Yeah. Oh, no. No, it's not the opposite. They're the worst, the worst tippers. Um, but anyway, there is an abuse going on, tip abuse, and it's harming people in the service industry, these machines that are kind of like I forget what they're called, but it automatically sets up the tip screen. Here's an example. I go to the gym.

42:11 I always like to get this bottle of lemon water. I go to a self-service refrigerator.

42:17 I open the door. I grab the bottle. I walk to the counter. I scan it the bottle and then a person has to like push a button to populate where I can do my Apple Pay.

42:29 Yeah. All they do is push the button and there's a tip option. Yeah. And this really I you know the employee has nothing to do with the way the computer system is set up

42:39 but it damages workers that are really really hustling where their minimum wage is it for waiters it's been $2 for like

42:50 40 years or something crazy minimum wage has not increased in 20 years and so it's damaging them but I think that I'm hopeful that we can start targeting if we ever get our country back that the uh corporate exploitation of this. The the corporations are not only exploiting and giving their workers a bad name, but they're exploiting you, the customer, too, because they don't want to pay them a livable wage.

43:17 That's very well said and much more succinctly said than than my little rant. And a great example of that I I remember that you know the restaurant Sugarfish,

43:25 it's like a sushi sushi chain. Yeah, I love that place. Um so they're one of those no tipping restaurants. And at first when I heard about this, you know, I'm like skeptical like is that because what does this mean? And then you dive into it and it seems at least from people who I've talked to who work there as well that they're they're a living wage restaurant. The tips are built into the price of the food that you order. Um, and that's generally a protection against shitty tippers, right? Because they want their staff and their members to be taken care of. So, if that works well, and to your point, if if that gets rid of the corporate greed, what a nice stop gap until we finally have a living minimum wage for people in these wonderful professions who serve us our food when we go in.

44:09 Wouldn't it be nice if these corporations or some billionaire opened up a a Starbucks style chain and at every register it said, "Please do not tip. We play we pay our workers a livable wage.

44:26 Yeah. I mean is there or or is there a psychosis to once you become a billionaire you just become a horrible person? It it it you know it can can there be a benevolent billionaire that emerges and takes over or is that not possible? Yeah, I mean like I've heard small smaller scale examples of this like a Sugarfish chain or something like that where they they do the live livable wage thing, but um but also real small businesses, right? I there was a um there's a a family friend dentist uh that that I knew when I was a kid and um uh my parents' friends and they told me you know they pay full benefits health coverage everything to all of their employees and it's just a small like you know eight person dental clinic at the time and I remember being in high school or college and kind of realizing what that meant. I'm like aren't you guys losing a lot of money doing that? And they they both were like, "Well, first

45:22 of all, we're immigrants who got to come here for a better life. Most of our employees are first generation immigrants who went to trade school and um we just think it's a no-brainer. Like they're they are the reason we have this thriving business. We have to cover their healthcare and their benefits and all of that." And you know, and the way it was explained, I was like, "Oh yeah, wait. Why isn't this just a thing? Where is the human decency aspect of it that comes that that cuts ahead of the the the greed there to your point?

45:54 Anyway, all right. Is it true that you are uh have been friends with mayor mom Donnie since you were 14 years old?

46:08 So, what I love about this question is it implies that he and I are like the same age and I'm like way older. So that makes me feel good.

46:17 Good on you. It makes me feel very good. So thank you. Yeah. Uh so I've known him since he was 14. Um you not me. Yeah. I was in my I guess late 20s.

46:29 Um his uh his mom is a a wonderful uh Academy nominated film director named Mera Nyer. Um and when I was a kid, one of the first movies of hers that I saw was called Mississippi Masala, which was incidentally one of Denzel Washington's first movies. Um, and it's, you know, how like when you're when you're young, there's like a couple of movies or actors or directors that make you go, "Oh, wait. Maybe this is a thing that I can do, too." So, she was one of those people for me when I was a kid. And then cut to uh this movie called The Namesake that she was directing that I for whatever could not get an audition for this movie. My agent couldn't get me in.

47:03 So, I wrote Meera a letter that basically said, "You're one of the catalysts for why I became an actor. I love the book that this script is based on. you have to let me audition for the lead in your movie. Uh, and she called and said, "Fly to New York." I was living in LA at the time. "Fly to New York and audition for me." And I walked into this audition. And the first thing she says is, "I just want you to know I read your letter and my 14-year-old son, Zoron, is a huge fan of your stoner movie, Harold and Kumar, Go to White Castle. And for the last three months, he and his best friend, Sam, have been begging me to audition you for the lead in my independent drama." and they showed me clips from Harold and Kamar and it just showed me that you are the wrong person for this job. But then but then I got your letter and I was like, "All right, let's let him come in. It'll mean a lot to thankfully I did well in

47:53 the audition and I end up getting cast in the job." But so so the day of the audition actually she says, "Once you're done, my my son would love to say hello if if you have a few minutes." And so he stopped by after school. And and I said once I got the job also, I like half jokingly was like, "Hey man, if you ever need anything later on, I got your back." And I'm just glad when he ran for office, he wasn't like this crazy right-winger who I would have vote a favor to, you know.

48:16 Oh my god. That could have been really bad because you made the promise so long ago.

48:22 Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Do you live in New York or LA? I do. I'm in New York. I was in LA for a long time, but I'm in New York now.

48:28 How about you guys? And did you get I'm in New York. Pumps is still in Oklahoma City. Just recently, my youngest son graduated and I decided to flee the Bible belt. I'm a Bible belt refugee.

48:39 Yeah. Um, but did were you able to participate in his did you campaign for him? Were you uh did you go to his inauguration? I went to his watch party and it was just electric.

48:54 Oh, awesome. Yeah. Um, you know, he I I helped him from uh from the time that he ran for state assembly. I was really honored to kind of give him a hand with some fundraisers and a few events and things like that. And um and I was also really floored like look the these you're asking the most biased person in the world. I've known him since he was 14 and he's the reason I got one of my favorite jobs. So just plant that little nugget as you will. But you know he he uh texted me a few years ago um when he was an assembly member and was on a hunger strike with the New York City taxi workers. Yes. uh for debt forgiveness. And he was just like, "Hey, man. Um you know, will you come down and just sort of say hi to the the folks are on the hunger strike with me, you know, it would sort of help with morale and we're hoping to put a lot more pressure, whatever." And I was like, "Oh, you're actually on a hunger strike?" Like, I

49:42 read your Twitter that said you were doing it, but you're like actually living there for this. Yes, of course. I'll come by. And I had texted a guy I knew in Mayor Delasio's office at the time and just doing one of those things privately that's like, "Hey, I'm gonna go see my friend who's on a hunger strike. Maybe somebody from the mayor's office could come out and that would kind of help

50:00 get this taken, you know, put a little pressure if you can privately." And the the response I got was like, "Yeah, we're aware of the hunger strike. Obviously, we're not doing anything about it. There's not going to be any debt forgiveness, but thanks for letting us know that you're going." I was like, "Well, that's gross." Um, and then I go, it was very inspiring to see Zoron with uh all the taxi workers and, you know, cut to a few weeks later and they achieved this debt forgiveness plan um against all these odds and I was just so proud of him um and was following all of his, you know, whether it's his human rights advocacy or this free bus pilot program um and seeing how I mean you saw this with the Trump video in the Oval Office, but he he definitely appreciates there are plenty people who may disagree with him on on policy or tactics or anything, but he's not afraid to actually have a conversation, a a um

50:54 friendly is too trit of a word, but a like a human conversation with somebody about shared goals and things like that. And I just feel like who who does that anymore, you know? So, it's been it's been exciting. And yes, went to inauguration. It was so cold. Uh but but a really special special morning. Were you surprised how Trump just fawned all over him in the Oval Office after he'd been you know he's a communist all the [ __ ] he has said and then it was just like he was like I love you Zorhan.

51:24 I was I think like a lot of people like I watched it live and you know I was like sitting like this very seriously as it started and by the end I was just like this is amazing. I think I think two things. one, you know, the the Zoran you see is really who he is and who he has always been even since he was a kid. So, it does not surprise me that he charmed the president in that sense, right? Um, and wasn't because I feel like if you look at all these Democrats, whether it's Schumer or Hakeem Jeff or any of these people,

51:56 they're like like, you know, they're clearly intimidated by Trump. Like if the only thing you can do is to either agree with him or continue to fund ICE or take a picture with a baseball bat and be like, "We did it."

52:13 Then that's not there's nothing real about that, right? And I think Zoron was not is not intimidated. Like I said, he's he's

52:20 he's he's happy to have a conversation with anybody and he does it in a very human way. The flip side to that also is I feel like we're now in this place where there's this manufactured outrage about anything the president does as if he didn't promise he was going to do it.

52:36 Exactly. He is an Emmy nominated reality TV star. Totally. You don't replicate that if you're a Democrat. Like the mistake that I think even Gavin Newsome is making is you're punching down trying to get all this traction on social media. It feels good. hit tracks because but it's all a response to this Emmy-nominated reality TV star. You have to craft your own path in a positive, progressive, forwardthinking way that gets results if you actually want to drive the narrative. And there are no Democrats right now who are doing that. They're all only doing a response to what the president is. So, it was refreshing to see Zeron in the Oval Office having an actual conversation with the president in in a real way. like the stakes are really high and he he didn't um he didn't hold back obviously in that meeting but it was still a great meeting and so it doesn't surprise me that they get along and hopefully that lasts you

53:29 know. Yeah. You know I think that shows uh how much of what Trump does is performative and there's no question he's a racist. However, this man has no conviction. Trump doesn't have conviction in anything except for him and his ego and protecting his fragile ego. So when Zoron walks in a brownskinned Muslim, is Trump Islamophobic? Sure. Is he racist? Sure. All of those things. There's no question. But he's such a prostitute, Donald Trump, that when Zoron walked in, he saw a goodlooking winner. And that superseded even his racism. And that is how what the con. This man is the world's best conn artist because when Zoron walked in, he didn't see brownskinned. He didn't see Muslim. He saw, well, here's this good-looking winner that took on all these [ __ ] hedge fund guys that probably used to look down on Trump, you know, because they knew Trump was full of [ __ ] in Manhattan, etc. And so, um, I thought it

54:42 was a really fascinating I was boarding a flight and I'm like refreshing my Twitter, refreshing my Twitter, trying to get like inject this into my veins. My favorite part was when uh they're like, "You called the president a fascist. Would you like to take that back?" And Trump's like, "Can I be? Don't worry about it. It's okay. As far you can say yes, good."

55:03 Yeah, sure. Yeah, it's fast. I'll just add to what you said that I you know the the and this is true and it's my understanding is this is what um what the mayor shared with the with the president is that um one of the ways that he won obviously was by expanding the electorate and and registering new people to vote, but there were a lot of people who voted for Zeron who were Trump voters. And so he reached out to them and said, "What was it about the president's,

55:32 you know, campaign that made you want to vote for him?" And it was all affordability.

55:36 Um, and so I think they I assume at least it seems from the readout of that meeting that they connected on that and that Zeron presumably shared a lot of that with the president that look, there are a lot of people in New York who were rooting for you and are rooting for me also. So maybe we can deliver the things that they voted for both of us for. And how refreshing would that be if we actually got results from that?

55:58 Let's not kid ourselves. Yeah, I was going to say I'm not saying smart. Zoron is surrounded by a lot of very smart people and they had the psychological profile and I'm sure that he went in and flattered him in a way that that Trump responds to. Like you see um anybody who wants to get something from Trump has this psychological profile. What's so crazy about this whole thing, Cal, is the president of the United States is the easiest [ __ ] on the planet to manipulate. Like, if I wanted to manipulate him, I could go, "You know what? I think your hair looks great. And honestly, I don't care what Stormmy Daniel says. I bet your dick is bigger than Obama's."

56:39 Yeah. Hook, line, sinker, he'd be in. You have the easiest [ __ ] on the planet to manipulate. But I do think there is a very important component to what Zoron did

56:52 um in taking on the billionaire class. And more than anything, he's able to walk into the White House in a way that Schumer

57:00 and uh Hakee are unable to do because he walks in with full-blown conviction. He has conviction. He stands up. If he sees an injustice,

57:11 he stands up to it immediately. If he sees or hears somebody do something that is racist,

57:16 he stands up immediately. It doesn't sit on the side and percolate. No exactly.

57:21 All of these other Democrats are just there's no conviction. It's all for show.

57:25 It's either for show or it's somebody as awful as Kristen Gillibrand who doesn't even show up or comment. She's like agreeing with Trump on all this. Yeah. Let's continue to fund this nonsense. It's just so so it is it is very um I I'm not foolish about how difficult the next four years will be for him, but I am hopeful that the new leadership style with a lot of the coalitions that Zoron has built is um it's exciting. It's hopeful, you know, it's hopeful at a time where there's not a lot to be hopeful about.

57:58 If only he were born in the United States. I like honestly I I it's going to be refreshing to have somebody who can't be president in an office like this because so so often people are like, "Oh, I can't make this choice because I'm going to run for president one day." And it's it's like it's limiting.

58:18 That's a great point. Yeah. Although I would sure like it. Yeah. No, for sure. Same. But I'm just finding I'm I'm just kind of outlining the silver lining there in the fact that he can't be president.

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59:18 Go to shopify.com/hhatit. That's shopify.comit. Hear your first this new year with Shopify by your side. And now a quick message from today's sponsor, the ASPCA Pet Health Insurance Program. Listeners, you know that my pets are a part of my family. They are my children, my spouses, my everything. I cannot overstate enough what an integral part of my well-being and serenity my pets produce. My dog Tubby has been having seizures lately, and I've been so worried about his health. Life with a pet is full of surprises, a chewed-up sock, a spur-ofthe- moment adventure, and these unexpected vet bills. listener, when you enroll in an ASPCA pet health insurance plan, you could get a $25 Amazon gift card. That's a little treat for you while you're doing something great for your pet. The program offers customizable accident and illness plans, making it easier to get your pet the care they may need. It's

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1:01:16 Okay, Cal, let's play had it or Hit it. Oh my god. Welcome to Had It or Hit It. I would hit it.

1:01:24 Had it. Had it. I hit it every day. Sometimes twice a day. All right. Had it or hit it. Faux food allergies.

1:01:37 Had it. Had it. Had it hard. Let me just So, I'm allergic to tree nuts. It is an anaphylactic allergy. I have to go to the hospital if there's crosscontamination. If there's a little bit of like somebody doesn't know there's cashew paste in something, all of that. when I'm out at dinner with a friend who has elected to be glutenfree or something free. Now again, I just want to be clear. I'm not talking about somebody who has a medical illness and can't have gluten. That's obviously in the same category as a medical allergy, which is what I have. I'm talking about the faux ones that like I read an article and two weeks ago I decided to like start going gluten-free. And so when I say something like, "I'm deathly allergic to tree nuts." And they're like, "And me too with gluten." Like, "No, you're not dying. You are not dying. You might have a little tiny tummy ache that what you're doing is

1:02:35 really awful because there are people who medically cannot have gluten and you are now screwing it up for everybody else by pretending. Just say that it's a preference. There's nothing wrong with a preference. I don't eat pork. It's a preference. Am I going to want This

1:02:52 what I call this histrionic histrionic allergy disorder. You have people that have celiacs disease and that is real and that is a problem and it's less than 1% of the population. And then you have the histrionic allergy disorder people who all day long they talk about I'm gluten-free. I can't eat gluten. I can't eat gluten. Then they get [ __ ] all liquored up just as all get out and then it's 2 am and it's gluten galore and there's absolutely zero fallout from it. And it's those people, the lying liars that are hijacking other people's allergies for histrionic purposes that I have a huge problem with. I feel like uh I and the tree nut allergy crowd should get together with the actual celiac crowd and do a really funny doc short about the people you described who like just will get shitfaced at 2 a.m. and then eat all the gluten.

1:03:54 Like there's a funny documentary there. I completely agree. You could get producer credits, Jennifer.

1:04:01 Exactly. I can add to my bio like the next time I'm on a podcast. And you can I have as many qualifications as Cal does now because I'm a

1:04:10 Yeah, producer. [ __ ] you, Cal. Yeah, great. Hey, you do it. You don't need me. I'll do the voice over.

1:04:17 Okay. All right. Had it or hit it. Smartphone charging plugs. Oh, Lord. Just had it, man.

1:04:25 Had it. I get that they are built to make us spend money every couple years and you got to get an adapter for the thing and like look I've got I've got is this a video pod also or is this just for us? Okay. So you know you got this this thing but then you have to put this on it now.

1:04:44 You have to buy that if you want to and then but then that's not going to work either. So then you just have to buy a new like I get it. I understand that that's how it's it's built for this, but man, that's just annoying.

1:04:56 Yeah. Like Apple doesn't have enough money. They can just let us all keep the same chargers. Here's what irritates the [ __ ] out of me on it.

1:05:02 Yeah. Right when hotel rooms started using just don't use the electrical outlet. We'll just make a place for your charging cord.

1:05:11 It's like five minutes later. Then we all went to the USB cord. So now they don't have plugin available and you can't charge your phone. That drives me [ __ ] crazy.

1:05:22 Yeah. It Yes. So So we're all in the same boat here. Yeah. Yeah. I almost feel like everybody says, "Well, no, it's better." I'm like, "At some point, we have to call a racket a racket. It's a racket."

1:05:34 Every time I go get a new phone, it's a new charger making my then earpods require a different charger. The W, you know, it just it's it's a neverending road of rackets and [ __ ] from these corporations. And I just think we need a universal cord across the board.

1:05:51 Yeah. I don't want my bundle of wires as if I'm an 80year-old man like next to my plug. It's no shade to all the uncles who I based that comment on, but they know what I'm talking about. Like just bundles of wires and chargers, just clear electrical hazard. Like I I don't want to be that guy.

1:06:10 Okay. Had it or hit it? You're going to have to help us with this. Fad drugs. fad drugs, meaning um for example, iawasa or things that have had actual uses in native cultures or communities that are now like pay $9,000 and go on an iawaska retreat somewhere in Mexico. You know, like the fad that like this is a cleanse. Like first of all, you it's okay to say that you have $9,000 and you want to just get high with a bunch of other venture capitalists in the middle of Mexico disguised as a thing that's apparently based in native culture even though a massive corporation is putting this tour together. Totally fine if you want to acknow it's that it's like that's that's the if that's what we mean by fat drugs. Yeah.

1:07:04 I don't look also with all this stuff, something like that. What a personal choice. It's not for me. It's only irritating when you have to hear about it. It's like your your friend who goes to Burning Man and calls Burning Man home and then says that like the the the real world I don't know, they have a term for this. The real world is not the actual real world. Like their actual home is the two weeks at Burning Man and they're so high for the next like six weeks

1:07:28 and you you just inter you have to interact. So that's to me that's the category I'm saying. I'm not saying don't do it. If that's your thing, man, go for it. Who am I to judge? It's just that when it comes into your dayto-day, it's like, "Oh, right. He just got back from burning, man. We need to we need to keep our distance for six weeks and make sure he drinks a lot of water

1:07:48 and exfoliates and thing." Yeah. Yeah. Make sure your feet are clean. That's like I've never been, so I shouldn't talk, but I'm just like pay me enough money to go. It just sounds absolutely horrible. all these people rolling around in a kettle pedal. Like, I can't imagine anything grosser.

1:08:05 The art looks incredible. The experience doesn't seem like it's for me. I have plenty of friends who have gone and have loved it. I haven't met anybody who went and was like, "It was okay." So, I I feel like whatever you see on Instagram is probably pretty accurate in terms of like, should I go or should I not go? Nah. Not for me, but definitely right for, you know, the next door neighbor who went 10 times.

1:08:27 Okay. Had it or hid it? eyes. Oh, had it. Had it. Had it. Had it. Um, I mean, what more is there to say? They're they're even the idea of what it was supposed to be of I mean, it's just so far beyond the pale of they're they're going after innocent immigrants and American citizens, shooting them in the face.

1:08:55 Both parties continue to fund ICE. I mean, it's completely ludicrous. I think ICE needs to be abolished. But furthermore, let's talk about what is called the Kavanaaugh rule right now. And this is a Supreme Court ruling where because of the way you look and those of you that are listening, Cal is a brown-skinned man. And because of the Kavanaaugh rule, you can be stopped legally by ICE for looking the way you look in the United States of America.

1:09:30 Yeah. It's really terrifying because the Supreme Court for years and years the precedent was you cannot racially profile that it was illegal and now it's like oh well if Trump and his administration want to do it we're all for it. I mean it's sickening.

1:09:44 It's sickening. And it it also like imagine what this does too, right? You if you are a person with privilege as I am, imagine there was some ICE agent who decides to detain me. Pretty cursy. A pretty cursory Google shows you that I was born and raised in the US and what I do for a living. Now imagine you don't have that luxury or that privilege whether you're a citizen or not. There's just completely no grounds for this. It's all just it's not just the racial component, but then the privilege aspect on top of it is that somebody like me doesn't have to worry because of what I do for a living, but somebody who looks exactly like me or the majority of New York, you know, has to worry because what do you do for a living? And is there a record of of who you are and do you have the right ID on you when you're just running to the grocery store? It's it's it's grow I agree with you. should be abolished. And and I I think, you

1:10:38 know, there were plenty of rational people who just sort of thought, oh, let's it can be it can be fixed. ICE can be fixed. Like, no, I I think it's clear that it's it's past that point. And I I keep going back to this because we have to remember who funded it. I mean, I hope our uh I hope people on the left, lawmakers and, you know, are feeling that pressure. I hope so, but I don't think that uh Chuckles or Hakee are going to do a goddamn thing about it. But you bring up a very important point, and it is that most of these Republican laws, whether they are abortion bans,

1:11:16 um the Kavanaaugh rule, which apparently Justice Kavanaaugh, the whining, snot, slinging, crying, beer drinker, um during his um confirmation hearings, you know, men are not emotional, therefore fit for office. He doesn't like that this is being called the Kavanaaugh rule. And so I want to always bring it up and rub that in his face that he is the one that wrote the affirming opinion on such a racist piece of [ __ ] legislation and his name should always be linked to that.

1:11:45 But the poor are attacked first. From our home state, Oklahoma, there's an abortion ban. And if Pumps has a daughter, if her daughter were pregnant for whatever the reason, it's nobody's business but her daughters,

1:11:59 they would have the money to fly to California, to Colorado, to a a safe space. And the poorest people get hit the worst by all of these Republican laws. And at the same time, these are the family values, the Jesus people, the moral high ground, the Lord this, the thoughts and prayers. And there it to me and I'm just gonna say it and I've been saying this on and on and on again. MAGA is a death cult. It is just all of their policies, all of their uh actions lead to death. The dismantling of the EPA, the dismantling of the FDA, uh the vaccine rescheduling, Mr.

1:12:41 Brainworm, piece of [ __ ] RFK Jr., the abortion bans, the ICE raids, all the concentration camps, alligator, Alcatraz, CCOT, and others. It all leads to death.

1:12:56 And yeah, none of none of this helps anybody. And the the you know, there's a there's another budgetary fight that's coming up like now in the next few weeks. So, we saw the last time Schumer was like, the Affordable Care Act doesn't matter enough. let's go ahead and, you know, open up the government. So, now we've got that fight again, plus the ICE fight, tack on abortion, human rights, obviously young people who happen to be LGBTQIA, like you on and on and on. Um, you know, my my uh my boyfriend Josh is from rural Mississippi. You talk to young white kids in rural Mississippi and the access points that they have for healthcare, education that are being cut off as well. Like I I hope that anybody who is I don't know how many actual aside from like in AOC Bernie etc there are but you know I I hope that in the coming weeks the the views of yours which are pretty well reflected in everybody who's so

1:13:54 pissed off right now I hope they take that to heart and say we got to you got to give us some concessions here if you want if you want things to be open.

1:14:02 You bring up something that I've been so passionate about all of my adult life. Um, and and it is you young queer and gay people in really deeply red spaces. And

1:14:15 it in the 90s and the early 90s when I was a student at the University of Oklahoma, I was an atheist um in the Bible belt. I didn't want to hang out with all the Bible study girls. I hung out with gay men and they were the most welcoming. And the same people that bullied me bullied them. So we were able to have this, you know, relationship. And what so many of these men went through

1:14:38 as the AIDS epidemic was, you know, still very, very dangerous in the early 90s. I mean, they just started the cocktail of drugs, but it was I had some friends that were on it and they were so sick from taking the drugs to treat their AIDS

1:14:53 and but more than anything, the uh their peers and their families and their churches and the isolation and the bullying that they were exposed to and the lack of love and emotional safety that they felt that still very much exists. And this administration has exacerbated this homophobia. And in red states, this type of homophobia is institutionalized. It's taught to children. It's embraced. It is nourished. It is watered. It is still so insidious. And it's one of the bigotries that white people kind of get a pass for and even did in more liberal times in the country. And it it really is something that I have really fought hard for and continue to fight hard for my whole adult life because so my mother told me when I was younger and I asked probably like six like why would somebody be gay and she goes well darling all you need to know about that is nobody in their right godamn mind would choose to be gay in the middle of

1:15:54 the Bible belt. So immediately taught me you know this is not a choice that our our responsibility is to love these people. So to your boyfriend from Mississippi, I mean that is these are very unheard voices that need our support because their governments bully them, their churches bully them, their friends parents bully them. It's it's just

1:16:17 awful. Yeah. Well, well said. And there are so many great organizations that are doing that real work, right? who who are not as um who don't trend as much as some of the larger great organizations that that that do a lot of this work. So, um I'm Yeah, I'm glad you brought that up and hope hopefully you're uh are you still in touch with all those friends?

1:16:37 Yeah, all of them. That's awesome. Yeah. All right, last one. Had it or hit it. The United States of America.

1:16:45 Oh, hit it. Hit it. We live here. This is our home. You can't abandon your home. um the I'll overuse the phrase that boring politicians overuse like the the ex the experiment of the American democracy or whatever. Um but the true part of it is look, you know, we I'll be super transparent and biased. Living in a place like New York City, uh, which has a hard left turn as of the last two weeks, uh, is, for those of us who are on the left, a a pretty, uh, hopeful place to be, especially when there's so much regression at the federal level and and in a lot of other supposedly blue states. Um, so I am I am not ready to abandon yet. If it continues down this path, I would like to explore Ireland.

1:17:35 No, I'm just kidding. Uh, no. I think I think hit it. This is this is our home and and you you have to continue to fight for what you believe in. I think one of the most insidious things that the um the right certainly does, but even frankly uh Kamla and Biden did so well is if you speak up and protest making you feel like you're anti-American or you're part of the problem, right? Kamla did this with a lot of the human rights protesters uh on the Gaza issue when she was running. Biden obviously did. Trump and Vance do it now regularly for almost any issue, including ICE protests and abortion protests and and all of the above. So, the second we start believing that raising our voices means we're unamerican,

1:18:16 I think that feeds into the like, should we move somewhere else, it's like, no, don't believe that's that thing is false that they're asking you to believe. They're asking you to believe that so that you feel disempowered and that you feel complacent and then that's how they continue to win. So, I'm going to say hit because I'm still a believer that we have to keep showing up and doing the right thing.

1:18:37 I love it. And you know what I love about New York City and some other really brave cities in the United States when they're called sanctuary cities. Yeah.

1:18:46 And this to me is so important because so many people are marginalized or vulnerable. And to feel like you have a politician like Zoron or like Mayor Frey in Minneapolis right now

1:18:59 who is really meeting human suffering and providing sanctuary in a time of mass abuse. It's like I think about the Trump administration as being like wife beaters. You know, they're just beating everybody up. They're toxic. They're drunk. They're horrible. And you want sanctuary and you want safety and you want emotional safety and camaraderie. And it's interesting coming from a space like Oklahoma which claims the moral high ground. They're so religious BFF with Jesus Christ and all this stuff and the cruelty that is injected into Yeah.

1:19:34 Oklahoma politics like they banned all trans care. Um schools are allowed to fire a trans professor at the University of Oklahoma because her student is a dumb [ __ ] that wrote a dumb [ __ ] essay. And so thinking about that trans professor at the University of Oklahoma, knowing that Turning Point probably has her identity as targeting her, I think about the idea of sanctuary cities and how much more quote unquote alpha that idea is and how much more

1:20:05 uh manly it is, and I mean manly in the sense that women can be in this too, to take care of people. how much more courage it takes to stand up and look at a bully or look at a bigot or look at a homophobe in the face and say, "No, little dick. You're not going to do that and we're going to keep these people safe." And I'm so [ __ ] sick of these alphas like celebrating the biggest dorkiest villains in America. And so I'm with you. I hit it. And I think we need to keep emphasizing our friends that are getting targeted by this administration, the poor, all of those beautiful blue dots and horrifically red spaces. And we have to fight for sanctuary, not just in New York, not just in Minneapolis or Los Angeles, but everywhere.

1:20:57 That false the the the false self-defined alpha thing is clearly just massive insecurity.

1:21:04 Totally. It's just it's and it's so obvious that it's massive insecurity. Um it just is it it makes me kind of laugh except then the stakes get real for really vulnerable people and you know that's why we got to keep showing up.

1:21:22 Yeah. So true. Calpen, you're cool. You're so cool. You both are awesome. This was really fun.

1:21:28 I've had it. Yeah. Thank you. I'm gonna work on my bio. Yeah. She's going to write that documentary so she can be visible.

1:21:38 Writer. Yeah, there's I should add a line of like was hung over for nine years or something like that just to so it's clear that that all didn't happen in the same year.

1:21:49 We could do like a tip for tat back and forth as we do podcast appearances. All right. It's so lovely to meet you and um I hope to connect with you again. Oh, I want to plug your podcast. It's called Listener. It's called Here We Go Again. It's distributed by iHeart and it's available on the iHeart Radio app or wherever you listen to your podcasts.

1:22:09 And can I do a quick 30 seconds on what it is because I realized I didn't do that yet. So

1:22:14 here we go again. I wanted to explore the past, present, and future of specific topics in a way mostly history and pop culture. Um, in a way that kind of makes you feel like you learned something from it. So there I didn't want to replicate there's so many great political podcasts but I didn't want to replicate the doom and gloom thing of like here's how shitty something is and here's why it'll continue to be shitty. So for example, our first episode was Bill Nye. Everybody loves Bill Nye.

1:22:40 He joined me to outline the space race. So in the 80s, the space race or 60s even, you know, how do we get to the moon was all between the US and the Soviet Union in competition?

1:22:50 And so much of the competition today is now privatized. It's between billionaires, right? So like why did that happen? What's the direction of it? Uh are we still funding space exploration? And how does it like help us on Earth? So, those are some of the kind of it just it's a fun light lesson that hopefully makes you feel like you learned a little something at the end.

1:23:10 I like it. I'm going to check it out cuz that's interesting. Yeah, I've if you're if you're a little bit of a nerd, I hope you hit because it's uh it's been a and also there there are things like so we had Pete Buddhaj on to talk about

1:23:23 actually we talked about infrastructure which is a horrible word that you should never put in the title of what's the podcast about but you know he he was the transportation secretary so he was able to outline certain things but I was like you know what this is my podcast and I just have my grievance actually you might like this so my grievance was like you're probably the only person in America who can answer this question from you when your flight lands early somewhere and you might even be like 30 minutes early. Why does the captain get on and say something like, "Uh, ladies and gentlemen, we're 30 minutes early and um there's no gate ready for us because they didn't know that we were coming. What do you mean they didn't know we were coming?" Literally technology

1:24:03 the technology is such that they knew we were coming. That's how you were able to land, right? So I was like, Pete,

1:24:09 what'd he say? So he has said I was hoping for like some conspiracy answer but he he was like well yes they shouldn't lie to you about that. The real reason is that um certain types of planes have to occupy certain types of gates. So even if you see that there are like 10 gates open the gate may not have been assigned to that type of plane and then also

1:24:30 aine right and then the ramp operators also they may not have enough ramp operators at that airport for all of the flights going in and out. So, if you're early outside of whatever that slot that you were allocated, you just have to wait. And I was like, uh,

1:24:45 well, all right. Thanks for the real answer, Pete. But he was great. He was a such a great guest.

1:24:51 Before we go, I just had to remind everybody as Donald Trump is sitting around with like 95,000 asskissers behind him and somebody mentions Pete Buddha Judge, he just like looks up and he goes, "Pete boot edge edge." Have y'all seen this? I've seen that clip where he just he can't say it, but he's like not even paying attention, but it's such a trigger.

1:25:12 Yeah, because somebody described to him how to say it. It's Pete boot like a boot on your foot. Edge. Edge. So, every time he always goes Pete boot edge edge.

1:25:22 Pete boot our toddler [ __ ] [ __ ] president. Calpen, you're cool. Cooler now that you've been with IHP. IHIP ladies. No question. You can add that to your intro guest on I've had it.

1:25:35 Yeah. All right, you have a good one. This was a lot of fun. Thank you for having me.

1:25:41 Okay, let me tell you how I feel about him. First of all, I loved Designated Survivor and I loved him in it. So, I've been aware of him for a while, but he's one of those people that you're with and you just feel light. You like he he's a very optimistic, sunny side person, I feel like. And and I like that cuz you and I probably won't get classified as that. No.

1:26:02 So, I I just enjoyed him a lot. Yeah. I I love that. And as you say that, I agree with you about that's the feeling that I have after. And then I immediately start to empathize with how Cal must feel right now as he gets off of this podcast. And he's probably like, "You know what? Those are the two biggest Debbie Downers Dune and

1:26:22 all is [ __ ] and [ __ ] on the planet. I feel like I need to go exfoliate right now."

1:26:29 Yeah. No, that would not surprise me. Like he brought us up, we brought him down. Yay. All right, listener, please buy your tickets for our live show in Atlanta. The first day sold out because we're hashed,

1:26:44 right? Nobody saw that. Nobody was more shocked than we were at the sales. Left for Sunday, uh, February 1st in Atlanta at Center Stage Pumps. Tell them

1:26:59 we will see you next Tuesday and Thursday. I'll tell you what I've had it with. Let's hear it. I've had it with that.

1:27:10 Listen up, patriots, gatriots, and natriots. We have a new podcast that has dropped. It's called IHIP News. It's Monday through Friday, every day, 15 to 20 minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America. Always served with a side of petty grievances. We are on all the available platforms. Apple, Spotify, Google, whatever you can get your podcast and YouTube. Please go rate, subscribe, and review so that we will chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind pumps. Pumps, what does an eagle say? Kaka.

1:27:47 A little bit more enthusiasm. Kaka. That's it. That's That's Kaka. That's the patriotism that this country needs right there.

Questions about this episode

Who speaks in "Manifest This, A*sholes"?

Jennifer Welch (Host), Kylie (Guest), Calpen (Guest).

What is "Manifest This, A*sholes" about?

The content addresses frustrations regarding the intrusive advertisements experienced by paid subscribers of news services and magazines, emphasizing the annoyance of deceptive pop-ups that lead users to unintended sites. It also touches on the importance of supporting quality journalism while advocating for a better user experience online.

What is mentioned in this I've Had It episode?

17 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including Cal Penn, Meera Nair, Mississippi Masala, Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle, Bill Nye, iHeart. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "Manifest This, A*sholes"?

The episode runs 1 h 28 min; the transcript is about 15,683 words in 221 timestamped sections.

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