Small Peen Regime

What this episode is about

The discussion focuses on frustrations with frequent iPhone updates that complicate user experience, highlighting issues such as lost functionality, confusing changes, and a general disdain for the decisions made by Apple executives. The speaker expresses a desire for simpler, more intuitive technology rather than constant overhauls that detract from usability.

Key takeaways

• iPhone updates: turning users into reluctant tech archaeologists, unearthing lost features buried under layers of confusion.
• Podcasts: the new radio? More like the latest episode of 'Who Can Talk Nonsense for 60 Minutes?'
• Tim Cook and Apple: Proof that sometimes innovation is just a fancy word for 'let's make things needlessly complicated.'
• Changing app layouts: proof that tech geniuses enjoy playing hide and seek with their customers’ sanity.
• Barry Weiss: The poster child for 'fake it till you make it' in journalism—where experience is optional and hot takes are mandatory.

Who speaks in this episode?

• Kylie (Guest) · 10 min speaking
• Jennifer (Guest) · 26 min speaking
• Angie (Host) · 26 min speaking

What is discussed, and when

1. 0:00 – 5:00: Barry Weiss, Tim Cook
2. 5:00 – 10:00: Barry Weiss, Donald Trump, Cash Patel
3. 10:00 – 15:00: Donald Trump, Barry Weiss, Cash Patel, Katie Miller
4. 15:00 – 20:00: BetterHelp, Hexclad
5. 20:00 – 25:00: Barry Weiss
6. 25:00 – 30:00: Donald Trump
7. 30:00 – 35:00: Donald Trump
8. 35:00 – 40:00: Tim Cook
9. 40:00 – 45:00: Katie Miller, Usha Vance, MSI Reproductive Choices, Elon Musk
10. 45:00 – 50:00: Cash Patel, Katie Miller

Notable quotes from "Small Peen Regime"

• Answer. I realize it's like from four months ago. And then on top adding insult to injury. I hate Tim Cook. I think he sucks so bad. So that gives me an extra resentment. Then I pop up today. You're getting an update tonight.

  about Tim Cook · at 0:52

• Mean, they're two sides of the same coin, except Netanyahu is, I think, more strategic and probably a, as Trump would say, higher IQ individual than Trump.

  about Donald Trump · at 8:00

• And all this [ __ ] just don't understand or we're too woke to get it right. And I just I cannot wait for the spectacular fall of Barry Weiss because it's really sad like 60…

  about Barry Weiss · at 9:00

• To make she has to be on there. Then, you know what I just noticed? First of all, I was on Katie Miller's disgusting, ridiculous podcast, and they're draped all over each other. they're not each other's like third spouse, you know? come on.

  about Katie Miller · at 13:19

• With Hexclad, cooking is easier, cleanup is quicker, and every meal feels a little more special. And listener, with over 1 million customers and over 50,000 five-star reviews, the secret is totally.

  about Hexclad · at 17:40

• 1.7 million client reviews. So listener, BetterHelp makes it easy to get matched online with a qualified therapist. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/hadit.

  about BetterHelp · at 19:25

• Philanthropy is essential. It's what keeps clinics open and care accessible, and it's totally reasonable. A gift of $39 is enough to give six women contraception a year. Go to…

  about MSI Reproductive Choices · at 40:54

• There is no world in which Cash Patel is dating her without a private plane.

  about Cash Patel · at 48:20

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

People

• Donald Trump — Person · Referenced political figure / antagonist · 5 mentions · first at 7:58
  Used as a central foil for criticism about MAGA politics, media influence, and authoritarian behavior; compared directly to Netanyahu and referenced in multiple tangents (cabinet, Fox News, Melania, Stormy Daniels).
• Barry Weiss — Person · Referenced media figure / target of criticism · 7 mentions · first at 4:40
  Portrayed as emblematic of anti-woke media politics and alleged interference in journalism; discussed in relation to CBS News/60 Minutes and pro-Israel advocacy.
• Cash Patel — Person · Referenced political appointee / example of incompetence claim · 4 mentions · first at 5:07
  Used as an example of perceived unqualified MAGA staffing ('podcaster running the FBI'); later referenced in a relationship/jet-setting context as a status-based pairing.
• Katie Miller — Person · Referenced political/media figure · 5 mentions · first at 13:23
  Appears in discussion of MAGA media ecosystem and personal/political optics; referenced as having a podcast the host appeared on and as part of a 'MAGA baby boom' narrative.
• Tim Cook — Person · Referenced business executive (Apple) / target of complaint · 2 mentions · first at 0:57
  Mentioned as the face of Apple in a grievance about iPhone updates and product UX; later referenced as attending a billionaire-heavy event/premiere.
• Usha Vance — Person · Referenced public figure (spouse of JD Vance) in 'baby boom' segment · 3 mentions · first at 41:49
  Discussed as part of a cluster of MAGA-adjacent pregnancies framed as political branding; used in commentary about traditional-family messaging.
  Talked about yet, and it is this weird White House MAGA baby boom. Okay, so in this article, it spells it out. Usha Vance, Katie Miller, and who's the other one? And I love it.…
• Elon Musk — Person · Referenced billionaire / speculative link in discussion · 1 mention · first at 43:21
  Mentioned in a speculative aside about IVF and as a symbol of billionaire influence; tied to the hosts' broader critique of elite power and MAGA-adjacent figures.
  Who's the father if it's IVF is I saw Katie flirting it up with Elon Musk on the podcast. Elon Musk loves to jizz in a petri dish.
• Ruth Bader Ginsburg — Person · Referenced historical/public figure (symbolic) · 1 mention
  Invoked as an example of a respected figure whose name is allegedly being stripped/removed in the hosts' critique of culture-war actions within government.

Sponsors

• BetterHelp — Product · Sponsor · 3 mentions · first at 18:35
  Promoted as an online therapy service during an ad read segment
• Hexclad — Product · Sponsor · 2 mentions · first at 17:40
  Promoted as high-quality cookware during an ad read segment
• MSI Reproductive Choices — Company · Sponsor · 2 mentions · first at 40:02
  Promoted as a provider of reproductive health care during an ad read segment

Full transcript with timestamps

0:03 So, we supposed to start the podcast. Ready? One, two, three. Patriots, gatriots, vatriots, black triots, brown triots. Oh, and olive maga can. [ __ ] off. All right, Pumps. What have you had it with? Okay, I've had it. Had it with up to my eyeballs in [ __ ] with my iPhone being updated. It's not authorized and I don't know what's happening after an update. It's hard enough for me to keep up on a regular basis what goes on on that phone. Not to mention that then it updates and I wake up and it's like, "Oh, you've updated. You have to use your passcode." And then I get in there and like I can't find anything. My text messages are all messed up. They say it's timesensitive. I go in there, I answer. I realize it's like from four months ago. And then on top adding insult to injury. I hate Tim Cook. I think he sucks so bad. So that gives me an extra resentment. Then I pop up today. You're getting an update tonight.

1:06 I don't know how to stop it. I don't know how to stop the updates, but I'm sick of it. I've had it. No more. No. It's terrible. It's terrible. It It's never They never update things for the better. I feel like it is a one of these things where you have a lot of hipsters that work at Apple

1:26 who are like, "We need to have a meeting and they're on Zoom calls. They're scrambling jets. They're pulling stuff out the parking lot. They're showing, you know, let me show you. Let me pull up. Here's the hyperface. Here's what you did now." And this is the over complic complification compl complication. Sorry guys, we do a lot of podcasts. This is the over complication of all of this uh too many meetings. And I think that sometimes people talk too much and communicate too much and try to invent [ __ ] to do that doesn't need to be done. About four updates ago was the best version of the photo album they've ever had. And since then, the photo album has literally climbed to the top of the highest dive on the planet, taken a huge swan dive into a completely empty pool, and I don't even enjoy my photographs anymore. I used to enjoy I can't find them. I don't understand the ordering. I don't know why the search

2:29 engine used to be at the top. Now, somebody's like, I got an idea. People are like, "What is it?" And he goes, "Let's move the search engine type in to the bottom." And all these geeky McDwebers are over. They're going, "Oh, [ __ ] totally. That is unbelievable idea. Let's move it to the bottom. That is [ __ ] rad, man. It's just enough." And you know what? I'm just going to say I kind of missed the button. Pushing the button.

2:55 I totally missed the button. I know that's total Gen Gen X moment, but I really liked that button. I like I like the the feel and the tactile nature of pushing a button. Well, and I felt like I had more control over it with the button. Like I was in charge. Now I feel like my phone's in charge of me. It's like wagging the dog that is me, which wouldn't be hard to do given my technological stuff. But yeah, getting another update. I'm sure it'll be even more [ __ ] up tomorrow.

3:23 Yeah, it's it's the the the relationship with the phone is it's a really tortured one. It's a really tortured relationship for me. Um All right, let me tell you what I've had it with. I've had it with podcasters and podcasts and the top of my list would be myself. Second on that list would be you because I hate me a little bit more than I hate you.

3:49 Um, Kylie and Seth, I don't like they they earn they're awesome and they have the worst jobs in America worse. But I just feel like I'm just like are pod are podcasts here to stay or is this a a phase? What's what's going on with the podcasts? It's just it's kind of weird. Is it I guess it's the new radio, right? New talk radio.

4:14 Yeah, I think it's 100% radio back in the day. But what's interesting is like nobody's watching like regular TV anymore. So it kind of feels like they're here.

4:23 The news is over. The news is over which I but not IH news that we drop every day wherever you get your podcast.

4:31 Stay with us. But I love that CBS so hard with their new CBS news thing. I mean that has been delicious.

4:40 [ __ ] Barry Weiss the demon Lesie from hell. I mean what? Lesbians are so good too. If I was a lesbian I would be furious. I would be livid about that woman because she is just you can tell she thinks she's hot [ __ ] and she doesn't know [ __ ] from Shyola this broad and it's the equivalent to me of Cash Patel thinking

5:10 yeah I'll run the FBI I got it te it up let's let's do it I I'll run the FBI I think Barry why she had this blog that you know the free press and she declared like culture wars are a problem and we're the anti-woke lesbians. Let's go anti-woke less. And the less are like, we don't want you anyway. So, she's like, "Well, [ __ ] that. Then I'm going to go join Trump." And it it is such a this is this it's like a MAGA thinks they're so unique and they're so original and they're like a string doll. It's like the same story with every single person on the pan.

5:46 We're anti-Dei and we're anti-woke and I think people should get their jobs on the merit. Hey, Barry Weiss with zero experience of running um any news organization ever besides your own blog that you started. Why don't you run CBS News? And then you have all these seasoned skilled journalists that work hard, like really work hard, work for months and months and months on stories. And this insufferable [ __ ] goes in and spikes the story about CCOT,

6:18 right? And then here's the thing that gets me so hard about her. So, she's this big like pro-Israel thumper, right? I would think if I was a big pro-Israel thumper, like we need to work on Holocaust prevention. I would think airing the Secott story would be on the top of my [ __ ] list to say, "Hey, we have red flags here. We have people in masks denying people due process, sending them to a concentration camp in El Salvador. This seems eerily familiar to the 1930s. But what is this [ __ ] TWAD do? She spikes it and then she wants to have credibility lecturing us on Israel. [ __ ] off. I mean, that's the thing about evangelicals and about these far-right Zionists. They have to force you to like their opinion because they're so wrong in it and they are in such denial about how wrong they are. So that's like evangelicals. We have to recruit, recruit, recruit. Right? The Zionists, if we control TikTok, if we

7:20 control CBS, if we control this, if they don't know that we're committing a genocide, then everybody will love us. It's like everybody hates you. Not because you're Jewish, because you're [ __ ] war criminals. That's why we love Jewish people. Your your Jewishness has nothing to do with the fact that you support war crimes and war criminals. That's why we don't like you. It's that simple. Yeah. And I I just don't think see any difference between Benjamin Netanyahu the way he went behind I mean, you know, he's funding Hamas on the down low. He wants to stay in office, so he's at war. Corruption charges out the gazoo. And then you have Donald Trump. I mean, they're two sides of the same coin, except Netanyahu is, I think, more strategic and probably a, as Trump would say, higher IQ individual than Trump.

8:11 Not that that's hard. Well, and the problem is Netanyahu has been in and out of power for decades. That mfer has been has the same line. He's been lying for years. Iran has a nuclear weapon. Iran's one day away from like since the 1980s. Like somebody did a hyper clip of it and the thing that it bugs me about like the Barry Weisses and the evangelical Christians and you know it it surprises me zero Barry Weiss's first interview was with Erica Kirk. I mean birds of a dip ship feather flock together, right? So both of these people are sitting there and they have this arrogance about them that their worldview is just so correct and everybody that doesn't go through their mental gymnastics of depravity and debauchery and war crimes and all this [ __ ] just don't understand or we're too woke to get it right. And I just I cannot wait for the spectacular fall of Barry Weiss because it's really

9:12 sad like 60 Minutes was a part I mean tick tick tick tick tickthood you know my parents would watch and then I'd kind of be like

9:18 that was a big deal. Yeah, it was a big deal. And um like the expose on the cigarette uh tobacco companies and all of that is big big stuff and it's going to fall. It's going to spiral spectacularly. And I hope the Ellison's I hope they lose billions. I hope they just bought Tik Tok and of course they've hired incompetent people to run Tik Tok. I hope it loses billions. And I hope that there are new platforms that come out where we have a benevolent billionaire that says, "Look,

9:52 I hate these [ __ ] every bit as much as you all do, and I'm going to make a cooler Tik Tok, a cooler this, a cooler that, and I'm giving, you know, I'm paying more in taxes, whatever. But we're going to fight these people together because Larry Ellison, Barry Weiss, Benjamin Netanyahu, Donald Trump, these are the worst the worst people among us that stand up for the worst people.

10:17 Yeah. And they think we're stupid. Like that we don't see how shitty they are. And it's like, hey, I know you have an inferiority complex and you think if you run CBS News or if you buy CBS News or if you're the president of the United States, nobody will know. Hate to tell you, cat's [ __ ] out of the bag. everybody that you're a [ __ ] loser and always has.

10:34 I did read that Tik Tok was like and I don't know how it work 150%. Yes, I saw that

10:42 pulling out not using the app, deleting the app. Maybe that was the the term. But I'm like good. But you know, here's the thing. I remember when Tik Tok was suspended for like four hours. And I mean, I thought my daughter and her friends were going to just it it was like the end of the world as they knew it. I don't know enough about Tik Tok to enjoy it or have fun with it. So, I don't understand why you couldn't just do that on another platform. But the younger generation is very tied to Tik Tok, but I'm with you. Let's get it started. And I guess here's the thing that drives me crazy and I just I'd love to brow h Seth. So, I'm just going to take a moment in terms of the hubris of these people that I can do it. Cash Patel, I'm a podcaster. Of course, I can run the FBI.

11:30 Pete Hexath was a reserve in the National Guard. He is running the Department of Defense and it has been nothing but shameful. He has demoted people. He has stripped names of boats because he is such a pathetic [ __ ] that he feels so threatened by people that have really served and done things for this country that he feels like he has to strip it like Harvey Mil, Ruth Bader Gins. He is the absolute worst of the I'm so cool. I was on Fox News so naturally I'll kill people in Venezuela, you know, on boats in the Caribbean. Like it just I don't understand. I really do not understand the people that I grew up with in their home. My parents promilitary back the blue. How they can it is crap. The bed city. Pete Hexth is so incompetent. He is so unqualified.

12:34 It it just I do not know how you support that if you say you're promilitary. He has made a travesty of all this. He is the worst of the worst hires. And then he talks about DEI. It makes me want to scream to the top of my lungs. And I just want to say this. You've you've heard all this [ __ ] about him. I just read an article about him if you can't tell. He does all this [ __ ] He has three baby mamas. He's married to one wife and he knocks up now the current wife. And he's got a just a horde of children. Homeschools naturally. Of course, he has the signal group chats where he does war plans. He includes his [ __ ] wife, which tells me she trust him

13:19 to make she has to be on there. Then, you know what I just noticed? First of all, I was on Katie Miller's disgusting, ridiculous podcast, and they're draped all over each other. Like, they're not each other's like third third spouse, you know? Like, come on. his picture, his official picture on his bio on social media has her like in the background. I'm like, that screams I [ __ ] around and my wife doesn't trust me more than anything I've ever seen. We have to have our wife on there cuz she has to monitor the texts. We have to have a picture of our wife and then when we sit by each other, even though we're old as [ __ ] and been married to other people a gazillion times, we have to have our arms all over each other in a podcast. He enrages me. Well, I mean, in a normal world, all of this would be considered a national security threat.

14:05 But in the Trump world, to your point about how can your parents think that he cares about the military is that would require critical thinking to critique

14:17 his intellect. All he has to do for the Trump people like your family members is tap dance on Fox News and go, "I love America and I hate liberals and I hate immigrants and you know what? I don't think our black vets deserve any recognition because I think the white vets are getting sidelined so that I can prop up black vets. And Fox News just goes, "This man, you know, I'll tell you what, honey. He loves America. It's this simpleton dumb down, no critical thinking, uh target the uh you know, tribal impulses of the worst

14:56 uh traits of humanity." And this [ __ ] just reigns in middle America and the cancer pumps and all of that is I think Fox News has radicalized and radicalized and radicalized people like your parents that should be retired enjoying their retirement and you tell me story after story about going over there and all they do is binge walk binge watch freebase Fox News

15:22 and what a miserable existence. A lady wrote a book about this um I think it was during the George W. Bush era, maybe the Obama era about Fox News and how devastating it was to the boomer generation, how angry they were in the polling since Fox News. They think they're about to fall prey to crime. They think that there's a bunch of people running around that hate America, which here's the thing. This was the generation that was like, I will die for your right to believe, say, feel anything you want because that is the promise of America. And they've been so radicalized that now they want to be the thought police. They want to control everybody's thoughts. And here's what's just the biggest red flag of all. And it's like our friends, the Good Liars, and some of these other people that go into the Death Star and interview these MAGA people. What do you love about Trump? And I've heard it multiple times.

16:17 And I go, I just love the way he Mr. Trump loves America. I mean, he hugged that American flag,

16:25 you know, the dry humping the flag. That's it. That's it. Because Fox News serves up that criticism means you're not patriotic. And then, you know, and then all these [ __ ] dick wads are all over Facebook. I haven't been on it a long time. Remember when I was? All these [ __ ] schmohhawks that I went to high school with were all like, "Hey, Patriot."

16:48 Yeah. You know, it's all this [ __ ] juiced up, low tea, you know, gyrating one pump chump energy. And you know, you know, you know, all the ladies know, you can take one look at Pete Hegsth, you instantly know. one. He's soft serve for number one. Okay, ladies. With Valentine's Day around the corner, a lot of special moments start in the kitchen. Whether you're cooking for someone you love, hosting a cozy night in, or just want meals that feel a little bit more elevated, Hex Clad makes it easy. It's time to upgrade from scratched up pans and mismatched tools to cookware that's as stylish and as practical as you are.

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18:18 Support our show and check them out at hexclad.com/hhatit. Make sure to let them know that we sent you Bonapetit. Let's cook with Hexclad's revolutionary cookware. This episode of I've had it is sponsored by BetterHelp. All right, listener. new year, new you, all of that. I think that's too much and too unrealistic. And I have a therapist through Better Help. And what we talk about is maybe a new year, a less burdened you. I would like to be less burdened. I would like to be able to manage my problems a little bit more effortlessly. I want better coping skills. And I'm able to talk this through on my own terms in my own private place with my therapist from BetterHelp. With over 30,000 therapists, BetterHelp is one of the world's largest online therapy platforms, having served over 5 million people globally. And it works with an average rating of 4.9 out of five for a live session based on over

19:25 1.7 million client reviews. So listener, BetterHelp makes it easy to get matched online with a qualified therapist. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/hadit. That's betterhelp hp.com/hadit. Welcome to I've had it. I'm Jennifer.

19:49 I'm Angie. HBIC B for beaver. Let's get Let's get There's our beaver. Let's get uh let's check in with the uh National Lesbians Association. I'm the head one. The head lesbian.

20:00 The head left. Would you please weigh in on how the less feel about Barry Weiss?

20:04 Oh, she sucks. I mean, when you're fighting for your place in the world as a group and then one like that gets the national spotlight,

20:15 right? It's just the worst thing that could happen. Yeah. That little [ __ ] that little evil [ __ ] I bet she has done zero coverage empathetically about Renee Good. I saw that she just had this this big meeting where she was like, "If y'all don't like it here, then you just need to quit your jobs to like seasoned real time journalists." This [ __ ] demon. Did it escape her notice that one of the thing the right was doing was demonizing her because she was a lesbian. I mean I heard that from jump. Well, you know she was a lesbian. Like that like that made a difference that she was murdered. And so it's just it's unbelievable.

20:58 Here's the deal. Barry Weise has internalized homophobia. She hates herself because she's a lesbian. And so she wants to join the lesbian haters and she thinks somehow that's going to fix her and that she it's like it's just like Clarence Thomas, the black uh Supreme Court justice. He hates that he's black. He marries this crazy ass white lady. Jenny Tom Thomas who was the January 6 ring leader. Like that's not a conflict of interest. like the like the Republicans would even allow that for a second if some Democratic injustice,

21:32 you know, it just shows how we play two different games all the time. Wasn't she in a cult before MAGA?

21:37 Yeah, she was in a cult before MAGA. This is her second cult. This is her second cult.

21:44 You can't make this [ __ ] up. and her his best friend, the African-American black Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas's best friend and the guy that pays him a [ __ ] ton of money all the time. Harlon Crow collects Nazi China, Nazi dishwear. And it's like, oh my god, I think some of these people that like live on the coast, they need to come live in Oklahoma with us for a couple weeks so we can really take them around some of this real hardcore MAGA culture so they can grasp how serious these people are about this.

22:24 No, I agree because I just don't think unless you've been around it, you get it. And here's the thing for Clarence Thomas, for Barry Weiss, and Pumps can attest to this more more than I can. How many times growing up would you hear there'd be a black person in the room and then the black person would leave, you know, I think he's a really wellspoken for a black man, right? Or isn't he a really attractive uh nicely pulled together black man or you know, for a black lady, she's this, well, you know, I couldn't really tell he was gay.

22:53 Well, Kylie sure is pretty. Could you tell that she was a lesbian? They try to diminish the person's blackness or diminish the person's gayness. And so then this marginalized person diminishes themsel and then keeps going to seek pro approval in a bunch of in a room full of [ __ ] bigots and they're never going to get it. Barry, you're never going to be filled up.

23:17 No, ever. Heck Seth, you're never going to be anything but a soft serve one pup chump. Honestly, I'm I'm glad you're bringing back the penis shaming. I feel like it's been a wild pump,

23:30 you know? Really, it has been because I look across the spectrum of all these people in this cabinet when they have those circle jerks and I'm like, this is the smallest penis size. We're talking like 2 in slim penis size on these men because they are so insecure. Yes, Jennifer,

23:51 I have a question. If you were to list in order from micro penis being the smallest to pinky finger penis um one two and three starting with no start with pinky.

24:06 Okay. So that's the biggest in the cabinet in the cabinet knowing that the largest one is still the size of a pinky on a toddler.

24:17 Pinky on a toddler. Yeah. 32. Uh 321. We got pinky on a toddler, pencil dick, and micro pain. 321.

24:30 Okay, you guys. Hang on. We need this. I can't keep talking about all the [ __ ] all the time. We need some community and just making fun of these [ __ ] droops. Pumps go. She shines at penile shame.

24:41 And and you know, and here's the thing. I really think about it. Like I've written it down. Okay. So, for my I would have to say that for my the the smallest of the small, I'm going to go Rubio.

25:00 He's number three. No, he's the smallest of the smallest of the small. Over Steven Miller.

25:08 Oh, cabinet. I wasn't counting Steven Miller in the cabinet. Okay, we scratch. Stephen Miller is probably inverted. He probably has like a go and it looks like a vagina because it's so in his and I've had an inverted nipple one time so I know that's true. You can do that.

25:25 Um Pete Hexa is the ultra slim the pencil deck. So tiny just really thin. No girth.

25:36 You think they make a condom that fits something that small? No. You know how like every guy wants to buy a magnum condom when it's extra large? I was like, "Bitch, you don't need that." He goes to the extra small store. Um, extra thin, extra.

25:50 Well, we know he doesn't wear them because he's knocked up everybody he's had sex with.

25:54 So many kids. So many [ __ ] kids. Okay. Um, Steven Miller inverted. Marco Rubio's pinky. Um, pencil Pete Heg Seth. I'm gonna This is probably going to surprise a few people. I think that this is kind of a dark horse.

26:15 Howard Letic. He is trying teeny weeny. Teeny weeny. Oh, for sure. Like he can't see it when he looks down.

26:23 He's just he's try he's so slick. He's trying to be slick. Yeah. So that that's my obviously.

26:30 What about Lil Smokey JD Vance? Here's my thing with him. Okay. Just from just from the view, I think it's probably a fine size.

26:40 It's a sport [ __ ] or something. No, not a sport [ __ ] but not not embarrassing either way. It's the way he uses it.

26:46 Okay. That's bad. Like he he doesn't know how to use it. He thinks that if he gets off in less than a minute, cheers, like great. Um he doesn't strike me as like, Usha, you know, was that fun for you? Did you have No, no, no, no. He doesn't care. That does that never comes into it. I suspect he likes to watch himself jack off more than he likes sex with women. That's just these are just observations.

27:14 He likes it. All right. What What else are we missing in the cabinet? Kylie, Google a picture of uh uh Trump's cabinet.

27:24 We've got Oh my god. Yeah, that de evil demon queen Bessant and then also RFK Jr. which I think that's raisin.

27:35 A raisin. Yeah. And he's Viagra ageish. So and you can tell he's taken like some steroids with which I think causes shrinkage.

27:45 I know that's true. How do you know that's true? Well, I dated somebody that took steroids and I could tell. Yeah. Back in the day. Well, I mean it's welcome to tell all with on I've had it podcast. Pumps has had an inverted nipple and a

27:59 Oh my god. You know how I forgot Duffy. Oh, is he tall Duffy? He looked tall and and like lanky in that

28:11 See, those are always dark tall skinny people. Sometimes it's always a surprise. Yeah.

28:20 Yeah. So that's cabinet 101 with an penis size cabinet. I mean you just that's really you know what I I would like to officially change my grievance where I started that I've had it with podcasts. I will hit podcast because I think this is the type of content that we need. Um Kylie would do you have any um anything to weigh in? I won't start I guess it would be wholly inappropriate to talk about vagina size and lesbians. I don't think. Yeah. I think

28:49 it doesn't hit the same. No. Well, and I just don't think men are so tied to their like their personality is by their

28:58 penis. Totally. It really is. And I just think men really think about their dicks. And I think a lot of the men in Trump's cabinets particularly think about penis a lot. It's just an observation of mine. I do. I think that there's a lot of I think Maggammen in general think about penises a lot. I think there's just a lot

29:20 of penile thinking thoughts that go on from time to time all the time. Thinking about each other's penises.

29:27 Mhm. We all know Donald Trump has a small penis because Stormmy Daniels told us.

29:33 How did I forget? And she showed us like a comparison mushroom. Yeah. She said it was a two pup jump, too.

29:42 All right, Kylie. What don't you have some stories for us to go over? I do. We have some stuff going on that we need to talk about from the last week and this week.

29:52 Okay. So, Melania debuted her documentary. I'm sure that's a banger. Uhhuh. So far, it's a huge [ __ ] flop. Uh, surprise to no one here. And I've got this article from the Daily Beast.

30:09 It says, "Ashamed Melania crew members hope documentary flops." So, a lot of her crew has been speaking out. And it says several crew members who worked on the first lady's Amazon MGM doc don't want their names associated with it. Rolling Stone reports twothirds of her New York crew requested that their names not be added to the film credits.

30:32 Really? Another source. Yeah. Another source said that they wished they had had the foresight to remove their name from the film. Um, another told the publication they're hoping the film, which required really long hours in a highly disorganized and very chaotic environment, flops. Quote, "Unfortunately, if it does flop, I would feel really great about it."

30:57 Well, and people on work on that work on any movie, any re any It's a lot of work. I mean, it is a lot of work. So, that they're ashamed to put their name on it. Here's the thing. Did y'all see on social media that like there's one ticket that's been sold in like London or something?

31:16 Oh, there it is. One ticket was sold at Hoits in Australia, which is like an AMC company in America. And I've also got reports that Melania documentary is seeing single figure ticket sales across UK cinemas and users online. Everyone flooded to their local theater online to see what the ticket, you know, how many seats were open.

31:41 Oh yeah. This this is just one of like a hundred tweets. So Donald J. Trump tweets, "Melania the movie is a mustwatch. Get your tickets today. They're selling out fast." And everyone's responding with not one seat filled in at their local theater.

31:56 I'll tell you what, Melania sis, if you ever want to uh really make a banger, I'll tell you what you do. It's you. One camera, one light, one chair, a microphone,

32:09 and you put that thing up to your lips and you start singing like a goddamn bird. You sing for this country. You sing for all the times you had to [ __ ] that man. and you've got all that orange [ __ ] all over your face.

32:21 You sing and you sing for freedom. Sing for everything. And that [ __ ] would sell out.

32:27 This isn't cutting it. Nobody's buying to this. Number one, you're not that interesting.

32:31 You speak seven languages. I've never even heard it ever. Um these people, the Trumps, are so pathetic. It's like they're so white trash. Like so breathtakingly white trash. like all the country club Republicans, they're all like being sophisticated. Trump's so garish and she's such a performative uh uh you know, thirst trapper with this documentary and and and then let's just talk about who paid for this. I was just gonna say

33:01 Jeff Bezos, Lauren Sanchez, like at some point when they first got together, Jeff Bezos and Lauren, he had an affair that Pecker from National Enquirer, he like got the story and all this. Now listen, a lot of people have affairs, whatever. I I don't like it, but I'm sure Mackenzie's like, "Take him, swing for the fences. I've got 100 billion or however much she's got, right?" Um, so I don't really fall like so many people we know have had affairs. I don't think that's a huge like, you know, I don't like it, but it doesn't mean he's a piece of [ __ ] And when he was first dating Lauren, they were all about the environment. Like I would see these posts on Instagram and it was like the Bezos Environment Fund and she was like in the jungle and she was doing all this stuff like the Bezos uh earth initiative and they were spending all this money to help like combat climate change. A noble cause. It's a big [ __ ] problem, the

33:58 climate change stuff, right? And then like everybody we know, whether it's a billionaire Jeff and Lauren or the people you know personally, once you start succumbing and capitulating this [ __ ] you just become the worst version of yourself. Now Jeff Bezos and uh Lauren Sanchez Bezos look ridiculous.

34:19 Act act just like Melania does. They don't know how to read the room. I I don't know what sort of philanthropy or any type of anything they got have going on other than just thirst trapping. Just pure unadulterated. We're rich as [ __ ] You're poor as [ __ ] Watch Lauren shake her big titties and everybody looks like themselves. I mean, that's just the vibe I get with it. You know, her tits are always up and at him and the inauguration that it was just like

34:48 he looks like he's one breath away from motorboating. You know, it's just I just want to go, Jeff, just motorboat. Just do it in public. We all know you're dying, too. You know, you don't have to

34:58 you hang out with Donald Trump's your best friend. Just go ahead and motorboat Lauren in public. You don't have to pretend like you have to have manners or polite or decorum anymore. Donald Trump's president. Motorboat Lauren. Nobody gives a [ __ ] anymore. You're about to fire all of your employees and replace them with robots and help Trump's eyes kill Americans. Just go ahead and motorboat Lauren. At least we'd go, "Yeah, now we get it. Now we know why you like her, you short bald fuck."

35:29 Yeah, we know what his dick looks like cuz it looks exactly like him. Real shiny.

35:36 Mhm. Okay. So, I actually read some unconfirmed reports that Melania, she debuted her documentary with, you know, a handful of billionaires. Tim Cook, everybody's there.

35:47 It was Tim Cook is dead to me. ridiculous. And correct me if I'm wrong, but it was like the same night or the same day as Alex Prey was murdered, I believe. And I've heard that she's upset and blaming that for like the failure of her premiere. And so she goes on Fox the next day and she puts this interview out and I think it's to try to Jen, we were talking about it to try to get rid of this ice heat and bring it back to her documentary. I read some reporting that she was furious with Donald that this uh ICE was hijacking the news cycle. And so of course she runs to her safe place, Fox. And I sent Kylie this earlier.

36:33 Pumps, get a load of this. And they're working together to make it peaceful and uh without riots. I'm against the violence. So if please if you pro protest protest in peace. You know I try to have empathy for her. I really do. She has to [ __ ] him. That's she's a monster.

36:58 Yes. Like she wants [ __ ] monster. Yeah. I mean it's like shut up. And here's the thing. The only interesting thing about a documentary about her is how she and Jeffrey Epstein, according to one person familiar with the times, she was his girlfriend first. Like that's what I want to. There's nothing interesting about her. I cannot believe that she was I did not know that. I did not know she was thrown a hissy fit and that she ran on Fox News. I boy. Well, and then how dare she stand there and say, "If you're going to protest, do it peacefully." And I want to go, "Bitch, it is your husband's Gestapo that is out there pushing women down,

37:46 doing all this hyped up super masculine [ __ ] that is created in this culture that I guess you raised your son in since he is a huge fan of Andrew Tate." And maybe instead of you getting on here lecturing people about peaceful protests and you don't like violence, maybe the calls coming from inside the house. Your husband's an adjudicated rapist. This is his Gustapo. He said he wanted generals like Hitler's generals. Yeah.

38:15 I mean, this is just going to go from bad to worse. You will always be a pariah. You you know how you your documentary would sell well? Be a [ __ ] compassionate person that gives a [ __ ] and stands up for marginalized people. Melania,

38:29 oh, I forget y'all don't know how to do that because you're both [ __ ] monsters and that's why you found each other. Just like Katie and inverted peen micropen vine Steven Miller.

38:40 Yeah. Micropene vision. Yeah. You know, it just Yeah. I mean, it's just you just don't think they can go any lower. And they always do. They always do. Like Michelle Obama had no idea that you go low, they got You have no idea how low it can go. Like honestly, I can say I never thought it would go this low. I just It's horrible. You You did. You always have.

39:06 When we were covering the campaign, I knew it was going to be concentration camps, grabbing innocent people, violence towards civilians. I mean, it this is I believe in the depravity of people and I also believe in the goodness of people. But living in Oklahoma for so many decades and seeing firsthand the lack of empathy that the most religious people I know had and knowing that that is the bulk of this man's support. It just doesn't surprise me that they're killing people like this and that the Christians are like not the good Christians, not you out, not you know the listeners. Y'all know who I'm talking about. The megaurchers, the Erica Kirker Christians. Uh they don't give a [ __ ] about this kind of stuff.

39:48 They don't sh They don't care that Charlie Kirk died. I mean, nobody even talks about that anymore, you know? It's just Grift City. Yeah. All right, listener. I want to take a moment here to talk to you about our sponsor, MSI, Reproductive Choices. When access to contraception disappears, what follows is unplanned pregnancies, unsafe abortions, and sadly, women dying. Even before the US cut funding and decided to sever the relationship with these UN groups, there were 257 million women around the world who couldn't access contraception. That's why you should know about MSI reproductive choices. MSI is a worldleading provider of reproductive health care, operating in 36 countries, running health centers, and sending nurses and midwives to villages where there aren't any doctors or pharmacies.

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41:40 I've got something that we have not talked about yet, and it is this weird White House MAGA baby boom. Okay, so in this article, it spells it out. Usha Vance, Katie Miller, and who's the other one? And I love it. They all announced their pregnancies. And right here it says 21 days. Usha announced 21 days after Katie Miller and then Katie Miller announced 25 days after Caroline Levit. So it's all within this really short period of time. People have been doing the math on Usha Vance's timing and they said if you do the 40week math from the baby Vance due date,

42:23 okay, it's revealed a startling discovery and they've got a photo of the time that Erica Kirk and JD Vance on October 29th were seen hugging and embracing on stage.

42:34 Okay, a couple theories. number one IVF across the board is it I mean it it seems so synced up and this is all this there are all these we need to breed we need to have people need to have more kids people need to get married and you can see like Katie Miller and her you know like how to be a homemaking Nazi podcast like I have a great idea let's all get knocked up at the same time and we'll bring youth and vibrancy and show all of these feminists and woke warriors that you we are just mothers and all this [ __ ] nauseating [ __ ]

43:10 They all work full time. Okay, let me ask you this. Just going like, you know, MAGA podcasters have conspiracy theories all the time.

43:18 Who's the father if it's IVF is I saw Katie flirting it up with Elon Musk on the podcast. Elon Musk loves to jizz in a petri dish.

43:29 Yeah, he likes it. You think all three babies? Well, here's here's the thing on the IVF. Like Caroline Levit's husband is like 30 years older than her. Like he's in his 60s, like late 60s. So there's no question there that we have older sperm that we had to upgrade. I would think.

43:49 Well, but you know, Viagra, you know, they're able to But the sperm is old. Yeah. But I mean, I think that's that's possible. You have I mean, look, you know, how old was Trump when he had Baron? I think he was already like 80 or something, right? Well, that's your minute.

44:04 Um, but uh I don't know. I just think I think that whole thing is just creepy. It's weird.

44:11 It's giving pill. It isn't. I think that's what they want. Um, on Fox News, on Fox and Friends, they were talking about this. They were so excited about these three pregnancies. And they literally say out loud like, "Do you think this is the beginning of young people wanting to bring back the families and the push of JD Vance wanting to have the traditional family back?" Like that's the goal in my opinion.

44:35 Yeah, that's what they're selling. This is going to backfire spectacularly because just hearing Katie Miller, Usha Vance, Caroline Levit, I immediately break out into Kaggles. Okay. And so

44:49 100% seeing people like this breed is an advertisement for not breeding. They are like the poster board for do not breed. Support Planned Parenthood. Invest in birth control. Wrap it before you tap it. Do not open up those highways. Ladies, I mean there is kaggel the whole time. There is no [ __ ] way this is going to want to make people breed. I promise you that. Nobody is going to want to breed because these are the most unlikable people in Mag. Like Katie Miller is so unlikable. Her husband is we as pumps really nailed I have to say has an inverted vag vagina as a [ __ ] He does. So that's a petri dish for sure.

45:38 Yeah. Caroline love it. There's nothing like the whole like there's nothing virtuous or enviable about somebody who's just a sociopathic liar.

45:49 Yeah. You know, do you I guess they wake up every day and they think we are [ __ ] nailing it. We are crushing life.

45:57 Mhm. They have to like sometimes I get so mired down and you always get mad at me, but I get so down like

46:04 does Caroline love it believe that [ __ ] Yeah. she knowingly like it's just like I can't wrap my head around it sometimes.

46:12 Well, Ruth, our our professor friend Pump, she told me they start believing their own propaganda that people inside the cult believe their own propaganda. That's a that's a part that's a part of it. And so they believe the propaganda. They just lie so much that it just becomes, you know, automatic.

46:30 That's the truth. Okay. Um the internet had some fun. Shout out to our friends at the Betches. So Sammy Sage tweeted, "Vance's fourth child baby names go." And I've got a couple of replies here.

46:46 Love her. Sophie writes, "Of Donald, as in the Handmaid's Tail style." Betches themselves respond, "Charlie Kirk Vance and Erica Kirk Vance Jr." Shephard says, "Surprise. It's twin boys named Crate and Barrel and William in the same vein says West Elm Vance. My favorite is Charlie Kirk. That wouldn't shock me. I would not be stunned if one of these kids wasn't Charlie Vance. Charlie Kirk Vance like Oh, if one of them has a voice, somebody's going to name after

47:30 Charlie. 100%. Yes. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, their best friend Charlie that they do zero about preventing gun prevention.

47:37 Mahala or what is it? Cash. Mahala. Cash. I'm surprised brow beat him. I am shocked as [ __ ] that he You know why? Because his girlfriend is the smartest of the bunch.

47:51 She's riding her PJ. Yep. She's riding on the PJ. She's getting she's getting Cash Patel's FBI agents to drive her and her all liquored up girlfriends all over the United States of America. the minute he loses his job, she's moving on because she she does not I bet he would love to cement the deal. I I bet he would love

48:11 I agree with that. Yes. He'd be dying. And she's young, too. I mean, like she Here's the deal, and I know I've said it, but I think it's worth saying again. There is no world in which Cash Patel is dating her without a private plane. There it just doesn't exist. No, there's no world that Cash Patel would ever be the head of the FBI

48:38 except we are living in unprecedented times. And what Kylie, what's the drag queen that came?

48:45 Which one? Monae. Monaet. Monae Exchange. Monaet Exchange. I said, "What have you had it with?" And Monae Exchange says, "I've had it with living in unprecedented times. I wish we were living in precedented times." And I thought that is so [ __ ] spot on. I think about that all the time. Monae Exchange, we love you. Shout out to you.

49:03 She's the best. The best. All right. Well, I think I think that's I think we did. Okay. Here's the deal, listener. We had to take a break

49:11 interviewing politicians, covering depressing news. I hope you all laughed. And I just think Kylie, where's she going?

49:20 Like she doesn't want her face to be associated with our faces. I just want you guys to have your moment. You're the star of the show.

49:26 Bye, Kylie. We love you. Everybody say bye to Kylie. Um, but anyway, here's the deal. We want to do some more episodes where people can laugh. So, will you guys send us some voice memos? We're going to record a lot of episodes next week for I've had it. And what you do is you go to your Instagram and then you go to I've had it and then you send a DM to Kylie in the voice memo. and let's try to make them, you know, really funny. I think the nation needs to laugh because for me personally and Pumps and I talk about this all the time, scrolling the news going, you know, seeing something so devastating uh and the terrorizing and the abuse that ICE is doing towards marginalized communities, it's it's hard to just sit in it all the time and make sure you're amplifying on your social media the the causes that you care about and the stories you want to amplify, but also practice some self-care. And we're

50:23 still allowed to have community and laugh and relentlessly make fun of these inverted visions.

50:33 We'll see you next Tuesday and Thursday. I'll tell you what I've had it with. Let's hear it. I've had it with that. Listen up, patriots, gatriots, and natriots. We have a new podcast that has dropped. It's called IHIP News. It's Monday through Friday, every day. 15 to 20 minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America. Always served with a side of petty grievances. We are on all the available platforms, Apple, Spotify, Google, wherever you get your podcast and YouTube. Please go rate, subscribe, and review so that we will chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind pumps. Pumps. What does an eagle say?

51:18 Kaka. A little bit more enthusiasm. Kaka. That's it. That's That's Kaka. That's the patriotism that this country needs right there.

Questions about this episode

Who speaks in "Small Peen Regime"?

Kylie (Guest), Jennifer (Guest), Angie (Host).

What is "Small Peen Regime" about?

The discussion focuses on frustrations with frequent iPhone updates that complicate user experience, highlighting issues such as lost functionality, confusing changes, and a general disdain for the decisions made by Apple executives. The speaker expresses a desire for simpler, more intuitive technology rather than constant overhauls that detract from usability.

What is mentioned in this I've Had It episode?

11 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including Donald Trump, Barry Weiss, Cash Patel, Katie Miller, Tim Cook, Usha Vance. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "Small Peen Regime"?

The episode runs 52 min; the transcript is about 8,633 words in 135 timestamped sections.

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