Transcript

This Story Will Make You Believe in Yourself Again | Jamie Kern Lima

From Jamie Kern Lima · Episode page · Watch on YouTube

· 1 h 23 min · 16,545 words · 187 timestamped sections

This is the full, timestamped transcript of "This Story Will Make You Believe in Yourself Again | Jamie Kern Lima", an episode of Jamie Kern Lima published December 24, 2025 (1 h 23 min, about 16,545 words). It mentions 18 people, works and ideas, including IT Cosmetics, Denny's, Big Ed, QVC, rejection tolerance.

What this episode is about

Jamie Kern Lima shares her personal journey of overcoming struggles, particularly her battle with a skin condition that affected her career as a news anchor. She emphasizes that these setbacks can actually serve as pivotal setups for achieving one's dreams, encouraging others to view their challenges as potential pathways to success rather than disqualifications.

Key takeaways

  • Struggle isn't a sinker; it's the sailboat that navigates you to dreamland's shores.
  • Rosacea's redness birthed a billion-dollar beauty revolution; setbacks are sometimes secret success setups.
  • Why aspire to unattainable beauty standards? Real women make real waves in the beauty industry.
  • Deaf to the internal voice? You might just be ignoring the roots of your own revolution.
  • Giving up on one dream paved the path for a billion-dollar wake-up call. Let go wisely.

Who speaks in this episode?

What is discussed, and when

  1. – 10:00: inner knowing, Believe It, Denny's, IT Cosmetics
  2. – 20:00: Believe It, serendipitous grace
  3. – 30:00: IT Cosmetics
  4. – 40:00: Believe It, IT Cosmetics, Costco
  5. – 50:00: Denny's, IT Cosmetics, Mel Robbins podcast
  6. – 1:00:00: IT Cosmetics
  7. – 1:10:00: IT Cosmetics, Miss Washington
  8. – 1:20:00: Denny's, Believe It, IT Cosmetics

Notable quotes from "This Story Will Make You Believe in Yourself Again | Jamie Kern Lima"

  • Important lessons in my whole journey, which is like how to get still, how to listen to your own inner knowing and making the decision to trust it. Right?
    about inner knowing · at
  • Denny's waitress sold her company for a billion dollars cash. And it makes it seem oh, she just got lucky or cruised. Yeah.
    about Denny's · at
  • I have a philosophy. I don't know if you agree with this. I love the title of your book, Believe It, because what you're talking about turning up this volume on your inner voice and turning down the external rejections.
    about Believe It · at
  • And he says so I want to let you know it's a no and we're going to pass on investing in it cosmetics. And I said okay like I'm used to hearing no at this point right? And I'm…
    about IT Cosmetics · at
  • Are setups and sometimes like sometimes rejection is really like serendipitous grace wrapped in this package labeled painful rejection. And what I mean by that is I was so desperate at the time. I think you just posted I just saw your.
    about serendipitous grace · at
  • If we ever had a date night, which was a miracle, we would go literally to the Costco, the outdoor Costco concession stand. We get a dollar.
    about Costco · at
  • Of purpose and learning how to believe in yourself. Ladies and gentlemen, let's give a big warm Mel Robbins podcast welcome to Jamie Kern Lima.
    about Mel Robbins podcast · at
  • Were you were a very driven person. You were the high school validictorian. You had a 4.0. You went on to become Miss Washington. You competed in the MissUSA pageant. You were…
    about Miss Washington · at

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

People

  • Big Ed — Person · 9 mentions

Books & papers

Companies & orgs

Concepts & topics

Full transcript with timestamps

your dream, your story came out of really a struggle of yours, right? Your whole dream, your whole business. And so many people, you know, that are listening to this are going through a struggle right now and they think that struggle they have

disqualifies them from becoming successful when in fact it may be the very pathway to their dream. So tell us about that with you first of all.

Yes. Oh, I love that. Thank you so much. Yeah, it literally an entire thing I thought was a big setback in my life. Um, ended up being a setup, right, for one of like my biggest dreams coming true. So, yeah. I mean, here, you know, I ever since I was the time I was a little girl, I I always watched Oprah and I thought, "Oh, I'm going to be a journalist my whole career and tell other people's stories." Like, right now, I literally just want to ask you questions, Ed, about you. like it's it's what's in me and and um and so so I just knew I knew that was my dream and and I started working as a journalist and a TV news anchor and all of a sudden I uh in my 20s I got this skin condition called rosacea which is hereditary so there's no cure for it and uh it started you know getting the I would get these big bumps that were bright red and feel like sandpaper on my my skin and I'd be anchoring the news I was working as a as

a television news anchor and I would be anchoring the news live and I would hear in my earpiece from my producer, "There's something on your face. There's something on your face. You need to wipe it off. You need to wipe it off." And I'd be live um on television. And I knew there was nothing I I could wipe off. Um and I saw a dermatologist and tried like every makeup product out there. Nothing would work. And it was this kind of season where I was like, "Okay, um am I going to lose my job? Um are viewers going to change the channel? Uh what do I do?" because nothing is solving this.

And so, you know, I went through a season of self-doubt for a while and I started just trying to, you know, try everything out there and no makeup product would work. And I had this moment uh where I realized two things. I was like, why? There's millions of makeup companies out there. Why is nothing working? And then I kind of had and and I know you have a daughter too, Ed, so you'll you'll connect with this, but I had this aha moment where I'm like, wait a minute. Like my whole life, I've I've seen these ads on television and in magazines. I've never seen anyone that has problematic skin the way I do.

I've never seen any I don't even know if those models were actually using that product. And I'm like, what if there's literally nothing out there that works? And if I can figure out how to create it, um, a I can, you know, solve my own problems, but I could probably also help a lot of other people out there who maybe have given up on on makeup. And then I had this like I think moment of grace where this where what hit me was way deeper um in the sense of I realized like okay if I can do this um I want to actually create a company where instead of these like unrealistic images of beauty that you know from the time I was a little girl I wanted to look like that but they always made me feel like I wasn't enough. I was like, "What if I, you know, create this company and actually use real, you know, women, all ages and shapes and sizes and skin tones and and and call them beautiful models and mean it. Like maybe I can shift

culture around inclusivity and beauty for every little girl out there who's about to start doubting herself and every grown woman who still does." And so it became this big mission. Um, but like anyone out there listening right now who's going through this or maybe you've launched a business right now and you're like, why isn't this gaining traction, uh, I poured everything I had into this dream and you know, I wrote the business plan with my husband on our honeymoon flight to South Africa. We got back, quit our jobs, and went all in.

Used all of our savings. And I thought, "Oh, if we can just create something that literally works, like

it's just going to sell, right?" Um, then I learned uh how hard it was to uh to become an entrepreneur. And it was this moment where

I learned probably one of the most important lessons in my whole journey, which is like how to get still, how to listen to your own inner knowing and making the decision to trust it. Right? And when I left television news, I thought that was my dream job. Like that was what I was going to do my whole career. But sometimes knowing when to let go of a dream isn't quitting. It's actually the victory. It's like that knowing of when to let go of a dream is as important as knowing when to go after one. So I listened to it to launch this dream. But then the first 3 years of running this business from my living room uh couldn't afford to pay myself and literally hundreds of rejections. I thought Ed, oh, I'm going to shift culture and beauty. I had this great idea and and you know, so there's there's beauty stores like Sephora and Ulta and QVC and department stores.

Every single one of them said no after no after no for three years. literally would say things like, "Well, you're not the right fit. Uh, your packaging isn't isn't prestige enough, and women won't buy makeup from women they don't aspire to look like." And it was just no after no after no.

Um, for three years, uh, we got down to under $1,000 in our bank account. By the way, I'm sharing this because when you Google my story, and this is why I wrote this book, Ed, because if we don't share the real stuff, like that's when we feel alone in our own rejection and our own, you know, uh uh lack of success or traction, right? And when you Google my story,

all you ever see is like, "Oh, yes. Denny's waitress sold her company for a billion dollars cash." And it it makes it seem like, oh, she just got lucky or

cruised. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, it was a journey that didn't make sense to keep going except for every time I would check in with my gut. I was like, "Okay, I'm supposed to do this."

But everyone keeps saying no. Um, you know, we got down under $1,000 in our bank account, as I mentioned. And

sometimes when there's no proof around you that your idea is right, and like your friends and family are starting to worry about you and they're starting to be like, "Are you sure you should have, you know, started this? are are you getting any sales yet? And it was like that. And it was this this three-year journey of having to figure out how to turn down the volume on my own self-doubt and on rejection everywhere and kind of like tune in or turn up the volume rather and that on that inner knowing that kept telling me you're supposed to do this. Um uh and that kind of was one of the things that made all the difference.

You uh there's so much there and I want you to keep going. Couple things I want to unpack there. And number one is this unrealistic image for women. It's really interesting.

Um, you know, with men, it really isn't that way. If you look at football, Tom Brady has a few ads. He's the good-looking dude, right? He'll he's got a watch out or whatever, but the guy that got all the ads was Pton Manning. It was the every man when it comes to men. With women, these unrealistic images, especially in the beauty industry, for the most part, are the images that we see. And so, you really did revolutionize an industry. That's number one. Number two, it's interesting to me that your dream was to be a broadcaster. I got to tell you, we both bagged groceries at Safeways and I was a broadcasting major in college and that was my dream. I didn't know I was going to show up 30 years later, you know, after my entrepreneurial journey. But I think life starts after your first dream is goes away. I really believe that's where you're defined. And I'm so curious about this journey with the rejection.

I have a philosophy. I don't know if you agree with this. I love the title of your book, Believe It, because what you're talking about turning up this volume on your inner voice and turning down the external rejections.

Those rejections you got were over and over again. I actually I was telling my son this who thinks he wants to be an entrepreneur. He said, "Dad, what's one of the things that most people wouldn't tell you?" I said, "I don't know that maybe the most important thing is your ability to deal with rejection as an entrepreneur." We talk about vision, we talk about, you know, communication, but can you deal with the rejection? And in your case, it broke my heart, but there was one meeting you had where you thought you had a deal finally, right, with this VC guy. And I want you guys just to feel the the the depth of the rejection that you may experience as an entrepreneur. And could you do what Jamie did and still push back? So, picture years and years of rejection.

You're running out of cash. You're working out of your living room. Everyone's telling you no, and then this dude almost says yes, but then really hits you with a hard no. Tell them about that.

Yeah. And I thought literally he was going to be my saving grace, right? Because again we were down to no money and we got um interest from from a private equity company and they loved our product. So our product worked like it really works. So they love the product um and they wanted to have meetings. So we started going down that path and you know they were really big. I mean they are really big. They they've invested in a ton of consumer product companies that you and I buy at the grocery store and you know they made a lot of them household names from nothing. And I just thought, "Oh my gosh, if they if they invest, A, I'm not going to go bankrupt. B, um, maybe they'll help get me into all these retail stores that keep telling me no and keep telling me I'm not the right fit and all that." And so, you know, we did meeting after meeting and we started the diligence phase, which is, you know,

where you show all your projections, your product pipeline, everything. And it got down to the last meeting. And, uh, my husband Paulo and I flew up for it. And I thought like, this is it. Like, this is going to be it. And uh I'll never forget the head guy was about was standing about 3 ft from me and uh he thanked me. He said you know that we should be proud of the product we created. Uh and then he says to me uh and he's about 3 ft from me face to face and he says uh so I want to let you know it's a no and we're going to pass on investing in it cosmetics. And I said okay like I'm used to hearing no at this point right? And I'm like all right well you know can you tell me why? cuz usually feedback is a gift usually. And um I'm like, "Can you tell me why?" And he's like, "Do you want me to be really honest?" And I said, "Yeah." And I'll never forget like I remember just like him looking at me for a minute and I

remember feeling my heart racing really fast and then I remember seeing his like his lips move in slow motion and he basically said, "I just" he did say straight straight to my face, "I just don't think women will buy makeup from someone who looks like you." um with your body and your weight.

Wow. And I remember it was this moment where for me it was almost like this lifetime of body doubt and self-doubt kind of like flooded my body and almost felt like um like I was staring my own fear straight in the eye listening to him and I like I a I knew I had to keep my faith bigger than it. Uh but Ed, in that moment like it's wild. I actually yeah hurt like I literally went in my car in the parking lot and cried my eyes out. Those [clears throat] things hurt.

But what stands out to me in that moment and and I actually never felt I didn't get mad at him. I still am not mad at him because guess what? the whole reason that whole why beneath the why on why I was doing this this company like he literally passed on investing in my company because he had the exact same uh mindset right right that everyone else does about what you have to look like the box you have to fit into to be successful and and he's just as much a a a I don't want to say victim byproduct maybe of the whole beauty industry too he's passing on an investment in my company because of my weight and and I remember this moment. But the thing that sticks out to me most is in this moment I had this feeling this deep this deep feeling like as he's telling me this um that he's wrong. And I had that feeling,

but I knew nothing yet that I had done prove that because I had no sales yet really. And I also knew like proving it would would first and foremost hinge on me believing it. uh uh for myself and you know fast forward and by the way in the years after that like it's discipline of recognizing when when when someone else's voice is playing in your head all of a sudden and I listened to a show you did actually where where you scratch like you scratch it and right and and that's what I have to do over and over like I'd have to literally get really good at turning down the volume on those things because oh and I want to tell you a full circle moment it happen.

That's so good. Um, but like that's I feel like that what you what you just shared about telling your son this advice right?

I feel like that's everything because I feel like so many people what ends up happening is everyone else's rejections, right, end up like equating to self-doubt in our own head, our own self-doubt about our self. we start to turn the volume up on that to the point where with all of it with our with with everyone else's opinions and in my case the lack of success around me it can get so loud that we can't even hear our own internal knowing anymore and I feel like so many people uh uh and then you have your friends and your family like they mean the best but they're seeing you through their own line their own lens of fear and inexperience right and and so between all of it so many people I feel like end up literally talking themselves out of their own calling and talking themselves out of their own truth and staying in their comfort zone at like the cost of it chipping away at their soul. We've

all done this. Um and literally missing out on the person they're born to be. And I feel like that's and my story is like years and years and years of rejection. When when I look back at the things I did wrong and the things I did right, usually like my biggest mistakes came down to when I actually didn't listen to something I knew in my gut and I I decided to go with something an expert had told me when it didn't feel like quite right. Um, and the biggest successes are are when I really listen to that knowing even when it went against what other people told me. So like,

wow, this guy telling me this, had I changed who I was, right, and and tried to fit some mold that he said would sell the if that were going to be if that was who I was authentically, then great. But it's not for me, right? And so had I ever conformed to him or any of those retailers that told me change this, change that and maybe we'll bring you into our store or L'Oreal that for three years of meetings said no and all the things I needed to do differently. Had I listened to most of any of that, especially the parts that didn't align with with my gut instinct, I would have never sold my company for over a billion dollars. I would have never I probably would be out of business. So, so that's

you hear yourself when you say this, Jamie, where you're like, I would have never sold my company for a billion dollars. Still, when that comes out of your mouth, is there a part of you like, I sold my company for over a billion dollars. Does it still hit you a little bit?

On one hand, I still can't process it. On the other hand, you'll understand this when I say this,

and you won't judge me for saying this, and I believe actually everyone in your community.

Yeah. I believe they're part of your community because they'll understand this too. Um, sell your company for a billion dollars is exciting, but like for me, I don't feel like I'm put on this earth to compete with anyone else. I feel like I'm put on this earth to compete with who God made me capable of becoming.

Amen. And I feel like I'm just getting started. Like I'm not there yet. So, so selling a company for a billion dollars is exciting, but like I feel like stepping into all of who I am and serving and giving and all the things I'm really called to do. I still feel like I'm not there yet. By the way, I feel like having watched you speak a couple times and then listening now, I feel like all of that happened, all of the struggle, all of the ups and downs, all of the selling of the company, all you've learned, all you've been able to articulate, your broadcast background, all of that stuff is leading you right now to your time. Like I think you were called for what you're doing now, which is teaching and inspiring people and giving them hope. However, you did say it came full circle.

What did you mean when you said that? What's the full circle? Okay, you love this. Okay. So, this is so good cuz I actually never got like I never got mad at him, right? Cuz for me it was like something bigger than him. Um so so so fast forward a few years. Um, and when we actually ended up selling to L'Oreal, uh, you know, it was their largest US acquisition in their history. And so, it made the homepage of Wall Street Journal, a bunch of stuff like that. And the day that the deal was announced, I got an email from him. Uh and and he said, you know, congratulations. You know, I was wrong.

So proud of you. That that whole thing he did. Um and also I learned that it would so two things. I learned it would have been the the most successful investment in his firm's history. But here's the thing, and this is where this is where our setbacks I feel like, oh my gosh, our setbacks, even when they suck. Like, it sucked to hear him say those words to me. It hurt. I cry. Like, it hurts, right? Rejection in almost any form. Basically says to us, you're not enough. You don't belong. You're not worth I don't think I will uh make money off you or I don't believe in you or it comes in all those forms and it and it sucks. But I really believe even almost all the time when I look back at almost all the rejections, I feel like that like again those those setbacks really are are setups and and sometimes like sometimes rejection is is really like serendipitous grace um wrapped in this package labeled painful rejection. And

and what I mean by that is I was so desperate at the time. I think you just posted I just saw your thing where you're like scarcity is value. So yeah, I had no scarcity back then. I would have given him like any part of my company. We were down under $1,000 in our bank account. I didn't know how we were going to survive had he wanted to invest had he said yes to us that day. He I would probably give him the majority of the company for probably almost no money just hoping to survive. But because he didn't believe in me and because we got so much rejection along the way when we ended up selling to L'Oreal eight years into the business um I was still the largest shareholder.

That's awesome. So, right. I love this serendipitous grace. I may steal that from you. That is beautiful. And you guys, I have to say something. It's why you want to get this book.

It's loaded with information like this. It's loaded with stories like this about believing it. Why do you need to believe it? Let's just unpack this rejection thing and then we're going to get to a magic moment. The reason that I think re your ability to deal with rejection is so important. It's not talked about enough. Let's just be honest. Do you know why 99.9% of dreams die everybody? You eventually get too much rejection. So if that's the thing that's going to cause you not to get your dream, 99.9% of the time it's just there becomes a threshold that you people don't take the rejection long enough. So they don't stick around to receive the grace. And so if that is true, if we already know that going in, then why not pre-negotiate in the in the very beginning what price you're willing to pay. Hopefully, it's anything as long as it's legal, ethical, and moral. So that the the the 99.9% of the reasons why

your dream won't happen, you've already set in your favor if you've just decided you'll take the rejection. That's why it's such a big part. How do you take the rejection? You got to believe it. And that's why this book is so powerful. So we lead to this point, guys. And again, the beautiful thing about Jaime's story is it's her vulnerabilities and her authenticity that made the brand relevant all the way up to the extreme magic moment. Don't hide your insecurities. Don't hide your blemishes, guys. Figuratively and literally in your entrepreneurial journey. Get people wanting to root for you. Your fears and insecurities are what connect you with the marketplace. Ironically, you don't have to hide them. You can work on them, but there's nothing wrong with saying, "I have them." So finally somehow you get this moment on QVC right and you are so brilliant in this moment you ask them I'll let you tell the story but to me

it's like if you don't do this thing again maybe it still doesn't hit all the way to the last second the last moment it was your vulnerability that connected you with the audience

you've done such amazing things with IT cosmetics and I know you know we've talked a little bit about it this year we're working on you know inspiring people that go after a million dreams together to help each other, all of that. And I think it's so easy to look at somebody like yourself and say, "Okay, you took you took something from scratch. Literally, you and your husband Paulo started in your living room and you eventually sold it for over a billion dollars." It would be easy for people to say, "Oh my gosh, she probably wanted a cosmetics company when she was two. Maybe she started when she was five, right?" But that was not necessarily the dream to start to start with. tell us a little bit of how this blossomed.

Yeah, it wasn't ne it wasn't the dream at all. And uh and I get messages every single day usually on Instagram saying, "Did you get lucky? Did you have connections? Did you have it's like no, none of that." And I I realize so often we just see the outcomes of things when they're, you know, when or the highlight reel. And that's why I'm excited to do your show and also just to write this book because I think like sharing the real journey helps everyone else when they're launching their own dream or maybe they're scared to go after their own dream um helps them feel less alone.

So yeah, you know, one thing you've talked about in one of your shows about this idea of sometimes our setbacks become our setups. Yes.

Um that's really what happened to me uh when I launched this dream in my living room. And just to share a little bit about that um just for you know anyone in your community listening right now especially like they're feeling in their they're in the season of setback or in the midst of a setback right

um that's really how this whole thing started. So, I I thought I was working in in my dream job. And, you know, since I was a little girl, I I always would, you know, sit in my living room and watch Oprah and I always thought like, oh, one day I'm going to share other people's stories with the world. Like, I always want to do that. And I was working in television news as a as a news anchor. And, uh, thought I was in my dream job. And I started getting um going through a season of setback. Uh, what I thought was a big setback. I got a skin condition called rosacea, which uh my skin is bright, you know, it gets bright red with bumps everywhere.

Sometimes it feels like sandpaper. And so I went to the dermatologist and I learned there's no cure for it. And I'd be anchoring the news. I I tried all this stuff to to try and and calm it down. Uh but I'd be anchoring the news and and often live while I'd be on the air in my earpiece. I would hear from my producer, "There's something on your face. There's something on your face. You need to wipe it off. You need to wipe it." And I knew I'm sure it totally helped you to focus and and calm down, right? Yeah, absolutely.

Well, and then it's like when we go through these times that I I started this kind of season of self-doubt where I would like my inner critic got so loud and I would be live anchoring the news thinking things like, am I going to get fired? Am I losing are viewers changing the channel? I went through this whole season uh started trying to find any makeup product out there. I never had even an interest in going in creating a beauty company. Uh but I started, you know, trying every product out there and none of them would work. And uh and I had this kind of moment where um I had this kind of this this gut feeling like I think I think when dreams start to brew in us or when there's like a seed planted in us where we have this dream it kind of started that way where I was like like it was like a little inkling like wait a minute if I if I could figure out how to launch how to create a product that works for me I bet it'd

help a lot of other people. Yeah. And then I would kind of like silence that dream and I would my head would take over. Oh, Jamie, you have no connections. You have barely any money. You don't know anything about the beauty industry. And you're you're in your dream job right now, right? And so it was I went through that battle. And I think everyone listening to us right now probably like really if they get still, they probably know right now if there's a dream on their heart or or or something they know or they're supposed to create or go after or offer the world or start painting again or start dancing, right? They kind of know. Um but sometimes our head talks ourselves out of our own dreams.

Yeah. We call that that essence of a dream, right? like that because I think sometimes even the word dream it feels too heavy too big like people are like oh I can't go after that dream or I don't know all that that's there or all that it will take and it's like all right well just lean into that essence of the dream and I love how you gave yourself that permission to first kind of look solutions for yourself but then to be able to say what if what if and I love too how it seems like very quickly after that you also started to say what if we did it differently because that was really something you started to do very early on to be able to say, "Hey, a lot of the marketing, a lot of the ads around cosmetics don't seem to be all that real or for real women." And I love how that really started to become a mission for you as well. How quickly after getting the essence of the dream and starting to

walk it out was that that why uh of of being able to say, "All right, this this is I'm doing this for someone else, too." How how soon did that happen for you?

Yeah. I I realized in the midst of like, "Why can't I find anything that works for me?" When I started trying to, you know, try all these products, I realized, oh wow, my whole life I've never seen anyone in the ads that looks like me that has skin problems, right? you you just see photoshopped ads and I kind of realized that there was never a product that works for me, but also never a product that even showed people with skin like me. And and it it um I want to say something that you said in in the very open of our conversation I think is really powerful for especially for anyone listening. You said, you know, maybe you've never sat at the cool kids club or the cool kids table at school. And I just want to say for anyone who feels like they don't fit in or they maybe don't belong or they're not like everyone else. I really believe, Mitch, that that can be your superpower because I think like I came

into this beauty industry and I didn't fit in and I was not I mean I didn't realize launching this company how it would be three years of being told no from all the retailers and that the because everyone sees oh wow because you know today at this moment that you and I are talking right now It Cosmetics is the largest luxury makeup company in the country which is insane because for three years. [clears throat] Every beauty retailer said, "No, you're not the right fit. Women won't buy makeup from models that look like that." Uh uh on and on and on. Change your packaging.

Change. Right. They And and I think that why we eventually were acquired by L'Oreal for so much money is because we ended up doing something so different. Yeah. that like and unique and odd that didn't fit in but that people connected with that it ended up being valuable to them. And I just think so many people listening right now, we're always told often in our lives to to fit in and to conform and

and sometimes when we fit in, it can actually be a disadvantage in a way because we start thinking the same.

Do you know what I mean? Absolutely. And I just I don't know. I just sorry that just like came out because I just think anyone feeling like they don't fit in I think I think if you stick to who you are authentically um I really feel like that is when you step in the the calling on your life like right and I think like it's so tempting for us to

to because we all want love we all want connection we all want those things and it's tempting to do it at the price of who we are [snorts]

and when I look back at this journey um about turning a dream into, you know, into something that impacted now millions of of lives. I think that there were moments when people told me to change what we were doing, change that was never going to work, that if I wanted to get in their stores, I had to do it the way they wanted me to do it. And those are the moments that I think um could have stopped this whole thing from happening had I had I had I listened. You know what I mean? And I don't know. Just want to share that.

Well, I love that. I love that one. you would hone in on that because I I so agree with that, but also I think that you you you make that point so well in the book of being able to take those things that maybe you've seen as your limitations or your doubts or the things that have caused you fear that if we just look at those a little bit differently, they literally can be our superpower. And and I agree with you. I think I mean especially with the story and I confessed to you before we hit record that I've not worn your makeup.

Um, you know, I I'm not an expert on the cosmetic industry, all of those things. But what I love about your story and the more that I've dug into it, it it truly is obviously you've put together an incredible product, but but the way that you've gone about it and doing it differently, which I think in some ways you had to like bolster yourself. You had to push through those nos. those nos made you even more like I don't know if it's the right word to say solid but it to be able to say hey we are choosing this we are not doing this by accident we are not doing this because it's easy um we're doing it because we feel like that's the right way to do it and that's bolstered you to help you then navigate the storm and I do want to say that you know uh you know some people might hear this and go oh my gosh they went from their living room to selling the company to L'Oreal for a billion dollars it's

like oh that's an overnight story. It's an, you know, all those things. You guys, we're talking about hundreds of hours of week, you know, working hard, paying yourself very little to nothing. Um, and really fighting for this dream, which I think is also beautiful. And you've also surrounded yourself with incredible [snorts] people. Now, I've gotten some questions from listeners. We're going to go after those in just a second. But one of the things is I think what I loved about your story is that you know so many things about your story but you got the essence of the dream.

You started to experiment. You saw the need. You saw the need to offer a product but also promote that product, present that product in a different way. Um but I was curious because so many people get the essence of the dream and immediately see the list of things they don't know or don't have. Right. What's one of the ways do you think like what was key for you to give yourself that permission to say I don't have all the answers. I don't have all the connections. I certainly don't have the big bank account. What gave you or how did you find that within yourself to be able to say but I'm going to take that next step?

Yeah. Well, I think sometimes and I talk about this and believe it a lot that I think sometimes knowing when to let go of a dream is as important as knowing when to go after one. And while I was in that spot of going, okay, um my my gut, my my essence, so to speak, is telling me to launch this company, but my head is saying you're not qualified, right?

Uh you don't have the right connections, all that. When I look back, um I And by the way, when you talk about, you know, the early years, it was three years of hundreds of nos and we got, you know, we couldn't afford our to pay ourselves the first three years of our com company. Um, if we ever had a date night, which was a miracle, we would go literally to the Costco, you know, the outdoor Costco concession stand. We get a dollar.

Absolutely. Yeah. You can get a lot for a couple of bucks at the Costco. That's exactly right.

At least. And it tastes good, which is the good part. But that would be a date night. I mean, it was

it was really tough. And there were so many nights I cried myself to sleep because it was another big no from a retailer or I didn't know how we were going to keep the lights on. I didn't It was a lot of years. And in the book, and believe it, I go into details about like some of the scrappy things we did, like how, you know, we figured out how to do things when we couldn't afford to hire people. And and I go into that because I think it's so important because you don't see that stuff on social media. You just see everyone's highlight reel.

And I just think like it's important for people that might, you know, feel like it's just them struggling or not getting traction or hearing rejection after rejection. And when I look back at all of this and I I talk about so many things I did wrong in the book, but one of the things that I did do right, um it wasn't that I somehow h was smarter than someone else or anything like that. It was really that I I when I when I would get still and I would hear my own gut feeling, which for me is how I hear God

talk to me is in my intuition, right? Um but some people may call it the universe. Some people might call it just their own internal knowing, right? When I would hear that internal knowing,

I would make the decision to trust it. And for me, that was one of the biggest things because there were nights I literally literally would just cry myself to sleep. And I'd wake up in the morning thinking like, "Oh, was that huge rejection from QVC really real or was that a dream?" And then I'd realize it was real.

Very real. And very, very real. And um I mean there were some really tough rejections. About two years into the business, we got a call from a potential investor that was a big private equity company. And I was so excited because they had a huge track record of making all of these uh products in grocery stores, big household names, and they loved our product and and they wanted a meeting. And we did a meeting and then we showed them our product pipeline. And you know, we were several meetings in and I thought, "Wow, if they invest in us, A, I'm not going to go bankrupt and b um you know, maybe they can use their connections to get us in these big beauty retailers that keep telling me no." And

we got down to the final meeting. And I'll never forget this moment because my husband and I flew up for this meeting and we were standing about three feet from the head investor and he says to me, you know, "Congratulations. We really, really think your product is fantastic. Um, but it's a no. we're going to pass on investing in IT Cosmetics. Uh, and we want to wish you all the best. And when I said, "Okay, um, can you tell me why?" Because I, you know, feedback is usually a gift. And, um, he was literally about 3 feet from me in person. And he says, "Do you want me to be really, really honest with you?" And I said, "Yes, please." And he said, "Um, I just don't think women will buy makeup from someone who looks like you with your body and your weight."

And I remember, Mitch, in that moment, here's the thing. So, two things. one, I c like I went out in the car and cried later. But I I I instantly felt, you know, like a lifetime of self-doubt and body doubt. All those things kind of fled my body.

But I'll never forget this moment when he was saying that to me, of course, it hurt.

Yeah. But when he said, "I just don't think women will buy makeup from someone who looks like you with your body and your weight." I got this feeling, this feeling inside, and I can remember it like it was yesterday that just said, "He's wrong."

Yeah. And I I actually never got mad or or it it was weird. I um when you talked about the why earlier because we all identify, you know, it's so important to attach a why to any dream. Um and uh but I did the work early on of identifying like really why am I doing this company? And it wasn't just to create a great product or to solve my own problems or to help other women, which is certainly all those things, but I wanted to shift culture in the beauty industry. I wanted to create a business where if I ever were going to make it, I wanted to use models that were all different ages and skin tones and skin and sizes and and skin challenges. Um, and I wanted to shift that definition of beauty for every little girl out there who was about to see these ads and start doubting herself the way I did growing up and and every grown uh woman who still does and person who still does.

So, I knew how important my why was to me. So when this guy says to me that I real instead of getting mad and I think this is really important when we're going after our dreams to not take rejection personally. Yeah.

Because I realized him saying that to me, him passing on investing in in my business was really he was just as much impacted by a life of the beauty industry as I was. He was making an investment decision based on what he thinks you need to look like to sell product. And so um so you know I uh And one more thing.

I love it. No. Well, six years, I didn't hear from him for about six years. And six years later, when L'Oreal acquired our company, uh, because it was such a big deal in L'Oreal's public, they disclosed the purchase price. So, all of a sudden, in this one day, it's all over the Wall Street Journal homepage, everywhere, like It Cosmetics, you know, L'Oreal buys It Cosmetics for $1.2 billion cash, this whole big thing. And I heard from him that day for the first time in six years. And he said, "Congratulations. I'm so happy for you. I was wrong. This whole thing and I I learned it would have been the most successful investment in this firm's history. Um,

but the other thing, and this is this is just I want to share this in case anyone listening to you and me right now like is in this season of rejection, right? Is there's that there's these famous words, and I don't even know who said them, but they're famous words that say rejection is God's protection.

Yeah. And like when we're going through rejection, we don't like doesn't feel very good. Doesn't feel at the time like how is this protecting me? Especially when it's unfair, it's hurtful. It sucks.

But like just and I have so many examples of this in Believe It but the book. But just this one story is like had he believed in me, Mitch, I was so desperate, I probably would have given him most the company for almost no money.

Yep. But because he didn't believe in me, six years later, my husband and I were still the largest shareholders when we sold to L'Oreal. And it just I don't know. I just think that there's so many stories like that where I just think it's important that we have our perspective of faith also

um when we're going through those tough seasons. Well, and I I so agree because it is that whole thing of uh and I think you and I share a very similar faith which is awesome and we've got people from all different faith backgrounds, but it is it is so powerful when we start to realize that those setbacks sometimes that adversity although it is brutal when you're in it. Like I can only imagine that felt like a real punch to the gut, but think about like like you said that adversity in some ways is something you needed to dig even deeper.

In some ways it it like proved your thesis even more of saying this absolutely needs to be fixed. And if somebody's going to do it differently, we got to do it right. And and I also it it did also protect you from then giving up a majority stake and all of those things. It's just incredible.

How do you believe in yourself? Especially in a moment like right now where the future is right in front of you and it is swirling with endings and with beginnings. That's always how I feel in the summer, right? Summer is supposed to be this awesome time where we relax. We dial it down. If you're lucky and you can get to the beach, that's fantastic. Or a pool. But when I'm at the beach, you know what? I'm thinking about my freaking future and the endings and the beginnings. And today, I want to throw how you believe in yourself in the middle of all these endings and beginnings. And how do you believe in yourself when you haven't even started taking the actions? How do you believe in yourself when you don't know how this thing is going to turn out that you really want to do? Well, my guest today, she's a super close friend of mine and she is somebody you want to hear from right now. Who am I talking

about? I'm talking about none other than Jamie Karn Lima. She's the founder of It Cosmetics, which she started in her living room and she sold it to L'Oreal for a billion dollar. And here's the thing that I love about Jamie. Jamie is the queen of learning how to believe in yourself because when she started IT Cosmetics, she was not some influencer with daddy's money. No, no, no, no, no, no. She didn't get a degree and how to start a company. She was a waitress at Denny's with terrible skin rosacea, like the bright pink kind of breakouts all over her cheeks. And it was that rosacea that and that hardworking work ethic from being a Denny's waitress that made her create her own foundation. And that was the beginning of this billion-dollar company that she created in her living room, It Cosmetics. And I know you're going to love hearing from her, which is why I am so excited that you're here to

talk to us about your journey. You are one of my favorite human beings of all time. I cannot thank you enough, Jamie, for being here as my friend and for being here as the professor on the topic of purpose and learning how to believe in yourself. Ladies and gentlemen, let's give a big warm Mel Robbins podcast welcome to Jamie Kern Lima.

Mel, thank you. Thank you for having me. This is going to be fun and real and raw and I can't wait and I hope it just adds so much value to everyone listening. So, I'm grateful to be here. Thank you. There's no question because you know how you have those friends in your life that you don't see very often,

but every time you do, it's like no time has disappeared and you just have this like kind of twinkle on your skin because you just love being with this person. I love you so much, Jamie. I'm actually mad at you that you live so far away from me. So, maybe we should just start right there.

I love you. Thank you. I feel the very same way. And one of the things I want to share, I know we're going to dive in deep on purpose. By the way, I love purpose professor. I'm like, yeah, let's do it. Let's do it. Because it's one of our biggest life questions. How do I find my purpose? Um, but I just want to say, Mel, something really important to me that I didn't want to leave here without saying. You can edit this out if you don't like it, but everybody listening needs to know this. You are one of the rare human beings that is the same off air, behind the scenes, in your everyday life as you are in all the public things. You know what I And you and I have both met so many celebrities and so many people with millions and millions of followers and it's very rare they're the same. And I just one of the things I love so much about you is you are even more funny, even more intelligent and brilliant and kind and

raw and real um in real life. So that congruency is like one in a billion and I love you and I'm just grateful to be here for you.

Wow. Okay. Hey, just that I think the episode's over now. No, we got to go back in time because, you know, I think one of the reasons why I wanted to have you on is because the entire mission of this show is to empower and inspire you listening to us right now to create a better life. whatever that means for you, to take the simple steps that sometimes feel impossible to pursue your dreams, to improve your health, to create greater connections, to believe in yourself. And Jamie truly is not only the professor of purpose, but her life story is a demonstration

in cultivating belief. belief in your ideas, belief in your intuition, belief in God, belief that things will turn out. And so I want to go back in time because, you know, I've heard you on the stages that you speak around the world talk about how you started as a waitress in Denny's

and then from waitressing at Denny's pursued a dream that you had of being on television.

And as a fellow former waitress, I would love to start there. Yeah. Waitress at Denny's. Um, full uniform name tag to prove it.

Oh, I forgot they had uniforms. Full uniform. Uh, what was your favorite thing on the menu?

Oh gosh, I love the pancakes. You know what? Just like simple. Um, it's so funny how our steps are ordered, I think, in life. And so often I remember being a waitress at Denny's. I remember feeling and and maybe um maybe someone uh listening to us can relate to this right now. you have this feeling inside of you like there's something more I'm supposed to do but you don't know what it is yet and you doubt it might be possible and I remember being waitress at Denny's and just feeling like I have these big dreams but not quite knowing like how do I believe I'm worthy of them yet and um it was this big season in my life uh at the same time Mel the kitchen at the Denny's I worked at was a disaster like they would take an hour to get pancakes out so I learned to talk to people so that they wouldn't leave they often did leave um or they'd throw like a dime and a penny on the table and leave

as your tip as if it's your fault. Uhhuh. But it's so funny how, you know, years later when I ended up launching my own business, I'm like, "Oh, I've got to get the operations right or nothing else matters." You know, it's just those little things we learn along the way. Um but yeah, after after that, I I um I thought my whole life I would I would have a talk show. I watched Oprah in my living room growing up. So, I thought for sure I would share other people's stories with the world. So, I went into uh you know, did all the jobs, saved up all my money to to pay through uh pay for school and and um push grocery carts in the grocery parking lot, sliced meat in the deli, all those fun jobs, and then found myself in my what I thought was my dream job working in TV news. And I thought, "This is it, right?" And what I didn't realize was I was about to enter this huge season of setback in my life. Um, of self-doubt. Uh, I have a

skin condition called rosacea. And for me, it started getting really red, really bumpy. Uh, and I would be anchoring the news live thinking like, you know, okay, this is it. This is it. And I started hearing in my earpiece uh from my producer, there's something on your face. There's something on your face. You need to wipe it off. You need to And I was live on television, right? And I would glance down during the commercial break and I saw, oh, the makeup is breaking up on my face and these big red bumps are coming through.

And it started this season that felt like setback. Um, but so often in life that the seasons that feel like setbacks are actually setups for what we're called to do.

Okay, stop right there. Did you hear that? The seasons of your life that are setbacks are often setups for what you're called to do. I want to just make sure everybody heard that. And I want to take a a highlighter and also highlight something that you said about being a waitress at Denny's and it's this. You said our steps are ordered. Mhm.

So, can you explain what that means particularly to somebody who's listening? Yeah.

Who may feel like, I know I'm meant for something greater. Yes. Why the hell am I at this step and this does not feel like it is like on the path of where I'm supposed to go?

So, what do you mean by the fact that our steps are ordered? Yeah. I believe, you know, everything in life y

is happening for us even when it doesn't make sense. Um, can we just What do you mean happening for us? So to somebody that's like really in it, Jamie.

Yes. Yes. What does that mean? Let me frame it around our topic of purpose, right? So often people feel empty because they feel like, "Oh, my purpose needs to be some job. It needs to be my job or it needs to be this this grand thing I haven't figured out yet." But for those of us that have accomplished a goal we always dreamed of, we get to it and we're like, "Oh, this isn't it." Right? It's never, in my opinion, purpose is never this this big goal necessarily. Purpose is so often when we're able to serve the person we once were or serve in a way for something we've gone through. And here's what I mean. Uh I think our purpose can be like, "Oh, wow. I went through a really freaking hard season in my life

and I now am actually realizing I'm born to be a generational cycle breaker in my family.

That is an incredible purpose, right? Purpose can be like, "Oh, I've been having a hard season for a long time." And when I actually just take a minute and say hi to someone else who's lonely, maybe it's like in the in the coffee line at Starbucks, maybe it's the the the neighbor down the street, whatever it is, you feel in your gut a sense of fulfillment, like a sense of alignment when you're doing something in your purpose.

And I think that the big mistake people make is they think it's this end goal, right? A lot of times when people uh hear my story and they hear the oh Denny's waitress builds billion-dollar company, they think my purpose was to be some big entrepreneur.

It wasn't. It wasn't. What was it? In the journey of how I did it. Yeah. I took this massive risk, right? Taking my makeup off on national television when I was told not to. Um and and being brave enough to be seen and helping other women realize uh that they're worthy and enough. exactly as they are, seeing them as who they are. To me, that is my purpose. And in doing that, um, it just a byproduct of that with it cosmetics is we built a company with millions and millions and millions and millions of customers. Uh, and what's wild is 5% of our customers actually have skin issues like I do. 95% don't.

It's just that they felt seen and connected with something that spoke to their soul. Right? for me being willing to say here I am exactly as I am, no makeup and you know all my skin issues. Um I think people connected with that that feeling of of oh I'm enough exactly as I am. You know what else I think is a really important part of your story. It is waitressing.

Yeah. It's pushing carts in a supermarket. Yeah. It's working in the back house of a restaurant. That's my story, too. Helping my best friend on her paper route. Uh, busing tables. And I think when you work in retail or you work in a service job,

and you feel at times invisible, you start to realize how important it is to treat everybody with respect and kindness.

That there is no work that is beneath you. And when you can bring that level of service to the job that you have right now, even if you hate it, even if treat people treat you like garbage, even if the the the the back of the house is not getting those pancakes out on time and people are angry, if you can bring a sense of grace and service and just humility to those roles, I think it changes how you show up when things start working out because you don't ever forget what it's like to be treated like [ __ ]

Yes. Because somebody was mad that their pancakes weren't out on time. Yes. Yes. And also, you and I have had this experience where we've truly gotten to see and be almost every type of person in every type of environment. And so now it's like whether it's me building a business or you building one of the top shows in the world, one of the top shows in the world. Um, I feel part of that was like, oh, we understand who who's listening and watching you right now. I understand who real people are who built, you know, who who bought my products and and and so when you mentioned steps are ordered, it's like, you know, no matter where you are in your life right now, what you're going through, I believe every piece of it, whether it's, oh, someone just, you know, cut me off in a parking lot and screamed at me, or oh, whatever it might be you're going through, all of those things are happening for you. I believe

so that you're amassing this toolbox of understanding uh and getting strong enough and equipped enough for the purpose you step into.

Amazing. So, professor of purpose Jamie Kern Lima right there. That's your takeaway number one. The steps are ordered. Believe in that.

And this moment is helping you. It's giving you something. So, that is one major tool that you used along the way. Let's go back to that moment because I think you were 28 years old, right? when you're sitting on television in Seattle.

Yeah. You are a local news anchor, you're living the dream, you're on your way, and you are now starting to have this nightmare happen.

Yes. Where your rosacea is breaking through on camera in front of everybody. The makeup that they put on you.

Yes. And you've got people in your ear telling you there's something wrong with your face.

Yes. and you're realizing, "Holy cow, the makeup that they've put on my face cannot cover the rosacea and the skin issues that I have." So, what do you do in that moment?

Well, the first thing I did was start freaking out, right? And I like literally I started entering this season of self-doubt where I would be live on the air uh anchoring the news, thinking thoughts in my head like, "Oh, am I going to get fired? Are viewers changing the channel right now? Like, am I costing the the company ratings?" Right. So, it was this.

Could you feel those moments when you could feel like the makeup not kind of like disappearing? Like there were moments when I used to be a commentator for CNN. I was premenopausal where I could feel the hot flash coming.

Yeah. I didn't feel it until they set it in my ear and in my earpiece. And then what would start to happen was I would get so nervous and stressed out because I kept trying to cover it um during commercial breaks. I could feel my heartbeat in my ears. So I [gasps] what I remember is [clears throat] like anchoring the news live and and you're and sometimes you have to be happy tell this happy story or or you're serious telling and I just remember my heart beating in my ears hoping people weren't turning the you know changing the channel and go and it started this this thing where I you know would spend what you know it's funny I was I was um anchoring the news and people think when you're doing that you must have all this money but you really don't get paid much at all and I took my little paycheck that I had and started spending it on um department store makeup professional artistry, makeup, drugstore. I couldn't

find anything that worked. And I had this idea one day like, "Oh, if I can't find anything that works for me, uh there's probably a whole lot of other people out there that feel like makeup doesn't work for them." And it was sort of this idea where I was like, if I could figure out how to make something that worked for me, um it help a whole lot of people. And that was my my knowing or this this this gut feeling, but then my head Mel was like, "Oh, but you got no money. You got no connections. you know, no one in the beauty industry, you're unqualified. So, I sat in this place, right? And I just want to, we're talking about purpose. I had this gut feeling like I was supposed to go for this thing, but then my head was like, "Oh, but here's all the reasons why you're not qualified to do it. Plus, you're in your dream job, right?" And I sat between those two. And it wasn't until I had this big big aha

moment of why I needed to do it that pushed me over the edge. Okay. So, what is the aha moment?

Yes. So, so, so I realized one day I'm like, "This makes no sense. There are thousands of makeup companies out there. How does nothing work for me?" Right? Then I had this moment where I realized I've never seen a model with bright red, bumpy skin saying, you know, selling makeup and like you always see these photoshopped, airbrushed models. And I realized, Mel, like, wow, my whole life, I've actually loved those beauty commercials, and I love seeing the magazines and and I always aspired to look like them, but but deep down inside, they always made me feel like I wasn't enough.

And I had this moment. I was literally on the news set when this happened where I was like, "Wait a minute. What if it's not just about launching a makeup product?" Like, like, "What if I could actually figure out how to do it?" Which I had no idea how and I had [snorts] no money, but it's like, "What if I could actually launch a product that works for me?" And what if I actually put real people as models? Like every age, shape, size, skin tone, skin challenge. What if I use them as models, call them beautiful, and mean it for every little kid out there who's about to start doubting themselves and and and every grown woman who still does. And that deep source of pain from from from how I was feeling not enough and what could I do about it? That in my opinion is one of the strongest ways to find your purpose. It's it's what has just destroyed you or hurt you that you've maybe made it through.

Yeah. And how can you now use that making it through to help someone who's going through it?

Okay. That's like a mic drop moment from our professor of purpose Jamie Karn Lima. So again, I like to unpack these things to make sure this is a this is a I always say this is not just a listening podcast. It's a doing podcast. And I want to make sure nobody's left behind.

Yes. And there was billions of dollars worth of wisdom that you just dropped. And so I want to try to unpack it for anybody that is listening to this and you have this sense that you're made for more. So, one of the things that I heard is look in your life and see what problems or frustrations or things that you're struggling with that feel like a setback. And Jamie gave you the example of the rosacea on her skin and her inability to find something that actually could help her solve this issue of being able to cover it up so that she could do her dream job. And that setback is a setup for something new. and then get out of your own sort of selfish or self-loathing or the self- excuses and the self-pity and remind yourself that there are 8 billion people on this planet now. There are other people that are dealing with this.

Yeah. And that if you can figure out how to put your energy into making this better for yourself and you bring other people into the fold with you, you now have something that's worth working on

because it helps you and it's going to help other people. And I also want to point something out that Jamie will not tell you, but I sure as hell will. And that is that this was about 14 or 15 years ago. So we're talking 2007208, correct?

In my opinion, Jamie Kern Lima is the reason why we have this real beauty movement. There always has to be the first person and she was it. So when you look around the the internet and social media and you see people doing naked faces, that was not something people did in 2007. It was all airbrush. It was all perfection. That was the beauty standard. There were no plus-size or curvy models. That was not a thing back then. And so you've got a woman who is sitting in Seattle who has no experience and no money deciding that she is going to not only figure out how to create a makeup line for people who have issues with their skin, but that she's going to do something nobody has ever done, which is put real normal people like you and me into her campaigns when she finally gets this figured out. and she's going to show people what her skin actually looks like in order to sell it. I mean, that

was a revolutionary idea. She was the first. And I'm telling you this because you could be the first. You have something inside of you that is a problem, something that you can solve, and you could be the first to change the way that people think about an issue. And so Jamie, let's pick up the story because how do you go from this aha moment like, "Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god,

to doing something because I think some of us have aha moments, right?" Yep. And then we doubt we don't do anything.

Yes. Cuz we doubt him. We doubt him. We think like, "Oh, someone's already done it." Yes. Or, "Oh, whatever." First of all, if you're out there right now and you think, "Oh, you have an idea or or a way you want to show up in the world or or or someone else you you know you want to help, but you think, oh, someone's already done it." Literally, there's only one of you in the entire universe, which by definition means no one has ever done it the way you're going to do it. So, when I launched this,

say that again, Jamie, for the people that are like, "Whoa, whoa, whoa. Kids, calm down." Uh, I wait, Jamie just said something. I was doing my dishes. Say that again. Talk about the fact that this matters. This is huge because I think the biggest reason we talk ourselves out of things is we think, "Oh, someone's already done it. someone's already done it before, you know, who must be smarter than me or more talented or more whatever it is than me. And and what I have learned and then proven and I want to tell you too about Oh, I'm going to get so excited.

Well, because no, when you do this thing like don't be shocked then when there's millions and millions of rejections and people don't get it, right? Um uh uh because it's never been done before, right? Oh, yes.

Cuz there's only one of you. There's only one of you doing it the way you're going to do it. But but just to recap that there is literally only one of you in the entire universe, right? And so if you are going to show up to this world authentic, that means whatever you do, if it's authentic to you, it's actually by definition it's never been done before,

right? And so when you show up that way, don't be surprised if not everyone gets it right away or, you know, in my case, all the experts I put on pedestals all said no. that this idea of of of how I wanted to um connect with women, they thought it wouldn't work and they thought I wouldn't therefore make them any money. Um so, but can I ask you a question real quick?

How did you go from the aha Yes. to starting? So, what did that look like? Like cuz I think like if you're in this space where

you know, let's just use an example. You've never actually you don't know the f you you you have this thing about catering that you just can't get it out of your head. You want to do these events. You want You've never actually done this cuz you had never

Yes. done anything with makeup. You had no idea what you were doing. Y you have an idea

and you have an aha moment. Mhm. What was the first thing that you did to start to make this real? So leaning on that why I had to do it and why it felt like it was going to be part of my purpose was a big thing that helped me actually take the risk quit my job.

Wait, you quit your job because you had an aha moment? Yeah, it was deep. I was like if I had

What did it feel like? It felt like um it felt like if I didn't do it, I would wake up the rest of my life with this pain in my gut, this longing knowing I was created for more. Um it felt like if I didn't do it, I would have the pain of regret. And if I did do it, I might have the pain of failure and maybe the pain of embarrassment and then maybe the pain of, oh wow, that wasn't that doesn't feel like it went how I thought it was. You know, I knew it was this big risk. I knew I was leaving what I thought was my dream job.

Why did you have to quit your job? Just curious. It was literally from day one, I was all in. Like, it was I dove all in. I knew if I was going to do this, I needed to just go all in on it. Um, and you know, I I started I do not recommend this, but I started working like 100 hour weeks from the beginning. I was so freaking passionate about it. Like I couldn't stop thinking about what if I can actually figure this out? What if I can literally because it was it became a big

So did you have any savings? Like do you have a little bit of savings? Because you didn't pay yourself for the first three years that you did this

first three years. So basically my husband and I wrote this business plan, right? Um quit our jobs, dove all in in our living room. We poured all of our savings into it. I thought Mel, and this is this is for someone watching us right now. I know this. I thought if I can figure the product out, it's going to be huge,

right? And then I realized like, oh, being an entrepreneur or or or launching a dream is not always that easy. We put every penny we had into it. And I once we actually created a product by and we were scrappy. If you want,

how did you create a product? Like are you in your kitchen buying stuff at the grocery store or how does this even work?

Okay. So, no. So, so first um I love that you know technology is right there, right? So researching how are makeup formulations made, who makes them, what are the FDA regulatory compliance, all the unsexy stuff I know nothing about. Just diving into the research phase of how does this happen? And then what I learned is that uh manufacturers are are makeup company's closest held secrets, right? Like closest held secrets, they won't disclose who they work with, but a lot of these big manufacturers work with all the top brands that you see or a handful of them.

Gotcha. So I started So are you saying that all of the brands and top brands that you see are basically manufactured by a handful of companies?

Yes. Handful of companies and then some do it in-house as well. Um so what I did was scrappy. I walked into a Sephora. I wrote down the name of every single brand in there. Went home, you know, I had no money, right? Cold call every single brand and saying like, "Oh, um I'm looking for a really great manufacturer. Could you let me know who you manu?" And then they hang up on me. You know what I mean? one after another after another after another and I got this really small brand in a totally different kind of positioning where the girl who answered said, "Oh, here's who we use. They're in New York City, blah blah blah." So, that was my first manufacturer. Reached out to them, had a meeting in person. Uh had no money.

Poured this idea out to them. They took a a risk making me samples. Uh and that's how it started was just really being scrappy. Um and and trying to figure it out. all of our money had went into uh the product development formula and the advisory board of the product and I thought okay now we have a product that works for me right this was after hundreds of formula iterations I thought that was going to be it

so is this like year one or year two like how long did this take yeah it took a good first year to get that product and then what I started doing was sending it to everyone I thought was just going to believe in me instantly so I sent it to Sephora and and Ulta Beauty and all the department stores and all of the online retailers, QVC, which is, you know, live television shopping channel. And I thought, "Oh my gosh, this is going to be huge." Every single one of them said no after no after no after no. And to your point, it became three years of not being able to pay myself. Three years of hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of nos of crying myself to sleep at night.

Were you and your husband like fighting like crazy like you should go back to work, you should Why do we do that? Like were you like doing that?

You want to know what it was? We still believed in it, but we weren't sure how we were going to make it. It was like friends and family that were like, "Uh, wait, you quit your job? Are you sure you should have quit your job?" Or, "Wait, you still haven't made any money?" Like, it's been three years, right? So, you hear all of this, the voices get so loud.

Um, the loudest though were my own self-doubt. You know, sometimes we take a chance and go for something because our gut is telling us to do it. And then all of a sudden, you face all this opposition and you start to question, is my gut wrong? Is my knowing wrong? And there were so many times where I would literally get this another brutal no from, you know, Sephora or QVC or whoever it was. And I would just literally cry myself to sleep. Um, I would pray about it and be like, "God, I feel like I'm supposed to be doing this, but nothing is going right."

Before we talk about It Cosmetics, I'd like you to rewind a bit and share this concept that I first learned in your book and that is that you were kind of always on a quest for achievement and it was sort of how you were finding love. I mean, you were and early in life, you were you were a very driven person. You were the high school validictorian. You had a 4.0. You went on to become Miss Washington. You competed in the MissUSA pageant. You were a well accomplished television journalist. Unpack this insight that you share around how perhaps your achievement of accomplishments and accolades was an attempt to find love.

Yeah. I uh lifelong journey on figuring that one out. And um yeah, so I I went through growing up with parents who worked super hard, like really really hard. I was the first person in my family to ever go to college and you know I started working really hard at a young age so pushing grocery carts in the Safeway grocery parking lot and I eventually was a waitress at Denny's to to pay my way through school and I always had so so two things on that Scott. Um I always had this feeling inside like even when I was waitressing Denny's I didn't want I didn't know one day I would be running a billion dollar company and have a you know billion dollar exit to to L'Oreal and all those other things. I did know inside that I I've always felt um I think God makes every one of us special and I always had this feeling inside like I was you know made for more whether it was to give or to serve. Um I had something in me to offer the world

but I I I still doubted myself and for many years of my life and actually it's probably a lot of people think my book is just how did you build a billion dollar company? It's really a book about how do you go from not believing in yourself to believing in yourself and not trusting yourself to trusting yourself and and and and hearing your own gut and trusting it because I think that's really foundational for leadership but also whether you want to build an amazing life or an amazing company um or an amazing team. Um, but that's very different than this idea of I I need to achieve um to have love, which was a big theme in my life. And I didn't realize that until I was an adult. Um, I grew up with with parents that worked all the time. And I uh realized, not I wasn't fully aware of this, but when I would achieve something big, um, that was when they would show up, right? And so I can look

back and recognize that now. Um, and what I realized is for a big journey of my life, I equated like, oh, I've got to win um uh to matter or I've got to achieve uh to um to matter, i.e. to feel loved. Right? So I look back and I realize that was a definite pattern. And I think for every achiever out there, whether they're type three on the enagram or they're just simply, you know, so driven, I think the biggest thing that has been, and on top of it all, and I share this in the book, for the first time ever, in my late 20s, I found out by complete surprise that I was adopted. Um, and I went on this multi-year search trying to find my birth mom and also trying to um trying to learn how to forgive and all those things. is I so anyone who's ever had kind of the rug pulled out from underneath them um by someone that they thought they knew or or loved or trusted, I I talk about that journey of

forgiving and healing as well. Um and you know I think that um it's been a lifelong journey of trying to understand the need to achieve uh and and how sometimes we can equate that to love and separating that um from I'm enough right separating I'm not enough I need to achieve uh to find love uh to I'm enough and this is going to sound I guess soft to talk about but I think this is an issue that impacts as many men and as as it does women. I think it's an issue that especially impacts leaders and CEOs because by nature they're achievers and by nature they're driven.

And one thing I talk about in this book a lot is coming to the realization that when you are an achiever and you're just trying to get the next thing and the next thing and the next thing, it's never enough and it never actually brings fulfillment. Um, and until what you're doing is completely bigger than yourself and in service to other people, that's really where joy and fulfillment in life comes in. It's also where joy and fulfillment as a leader comes in. It's where joy and fulfillment uh for your own teams comes in, right? To go back to like the why beneath the why. I mean, it was so much bigger than ourselves. um to to shift culture in the whole beauty industry for every little kid who's about to start doubting themselves and every grown woman who still does um is a very bigger than ourselves why that every person on our team once we grew and grew and grew could deeply identify with. So being in

service for something greater than ourselves, I believe is one of the the the pieces of our secret sauce that allowed us to enter an industry of giants. Pass all of these people people used to say you could never break into the beauty industry because all the department store uh floor space was controlled by a small number of giants, etc., etc. And we were able to break in and pass all of them. And I believe a big part of that is because the the authentic reason for why we were doing what we were doing was bigger than ourselves. A lot of companies will have a why that's attached to sales or you know they think rewarding employees with bonuses and this and that is enough uh to have retention. Um but I really believe how we scaled is because the the why was so much bigger um than ourselves in service uh was a was a big component of it and it was authentic right and I think the same thing for anyone who's an achiever

in life um I think the same thing is true is a lot of times people continue who are achiever-based continue to accomplish and accomplish and achieve and get praise from the outside world because they have what the world tells them success looks like um but they're not fulfilled. And I think that you know step one is becoming aware of it. Oh wow. I actually have thought accomplishment or achievement um is significance or is love and being aware of it being like that's not true because and we know it's not true because it never feels fulfilling when when we achieve another thing right and then taking the step beyond to realize like oh yeah when I when I live my life in service of others when I approach the day with um how can I give how can I serve Um who I think it was my friend Brendan Bashard that said like when you walk in a room instead of saying look at me um you say I see you right when we switch

our mindset to that whether it is in the workplace or in our daily lives. I think that is one of the foundational steps to overcoming that whole achiever thing because and it doesn't mean you're less competitive um at all at all. But it means that your your competition shifts and what I mean by that is I talk a lot in the book about this journey of competition, this journey of how I saw the competitive landscape. um this journey of how I made sure I didn't get distracted by what our competition was doing and let it tempt me or my teams to dilute their own secret sauce. And I talk a lot and believe it about realizing like really realizing this lesson that I believe in every ounce of my being, which is that as individuals, we're not here on this earth to compete with anyone else. We're here to compete with the person God made us capable of becoming. Right? And when I think of who God made me capable of becoming, I know

I'm nowhere there yet. And I know that person, while I want to give and serve and all that, who he made me capable of becoming kind of has nothing to do with uh titles or accolades or things I achieve or money in the bank. It's am I serving at the highest level? Am I using everything that he gave me to be to live in a life of service that actually makes a difference for other people? And so for me, when we measure our own um achievement that way, that's when it becomes fulfilling. Um and so it's been a big life lesson for me. And I still right now, and I'm sure Scott, you do as well, know so many people that the world tells them every day that what they're doing is successful, but they're not happy. And I think it's because they haven't crossed that threshold from achievement uh for themselves to none of those things matter. What matters is am I am I living a life in service that that's

greater than myself? Am I using all the gifts and talents that I've been blessed to be born with to live a life in service and and make a difference? And that can come at the core of every for-profit company and for-profit leader as well as of course nonprofit and everything else. said that that's an internal like leadership is an internal job. First

Jamie so beautifully said you sold the company how many years ago? Uh three years ago. Three and a half.

Does that mean that do you still work for the company? Yeah. So what happened? Um so I agreed uh to stay on as the CEO of the company and there's nothing financially holding me to it but uh but I gave them my word that I would stay for three years. And so um so it was pretty uh cool in the sense of you know I started this scrappy business couldn't afford to pay myself the first three years as I shared and had to do oh my gosh I share all the crazy stuff in the book about like all the jobs I tried to do myself and how when I couldn't afford to hire anyone I was trying to trying to just figure it all out and all the stuff we did to do that and uh so so it was wild to then you know be acquired by L'Oreal and uh and see inside of this massive company.

And it was a really cool experience. I felt underdressed every single day of my life. Um and and uh but it was this kind of like really wild moment where I was just like, "Wow, you know, when I was waitressing table Denny's, I didn't imagine I would be inside of L'Oreal headquarters in Paris." And I, you know, it was the coolest experience. So So I gave them my word I would stay for three years. Um and I kept my CEO title at It Cosmetics. That meant that I was the first woman in their 100 plus year history to hold a CEO title of any brand. Uh, which was really fun and I learned a ton and in three years.

How ironic is that? Yet you were the only CEO in cosmetics of a beauty brand. That's a woman.

That's a woman. Well, I I I believe you know that what is that saying? Uh, won't be the last. There's going to be a lot more because because for sure [snorts]

So there should be, you know. Yeah. Are you done there now? Yeah. So, so I double, so we doubled the size of the business in the first two years after they bought it and I ran it for three years and then I just had this knowing we talk about and and by the way, oh my gosh, okay. So, you know, I would when we started doing really really well is when I started hearing from book agents and producers and stuff about my story and I always had this feeling like I didn't want to do it unless I I knew it would be authentic and they're like, "We can have a ghostriter or whatever." And I always said no because I was so focused on running the business. So, I said no to meetings for five years. And about a year and a half ago, I just had this feeling like, okay, I'm supposed to give or serve at a at at a at a whole new level and and share everything I've gone through because what I've learned is like when we share that stuff, it's

the most fulfilling when you have like like even right now um I'm doing an insider kind of launch group for the book. And so a few people just like your mom are starting to read the book and I'm getting messages of women saying like, "Oh my gosh, this week I made the decision to trust myself and it worked." And I'm just like like sobbing at my this is where I get my greatest joy and my greatest fulfillment. And so I decided that to to step away um because some you know sometimes knowing when to let go of a dream is is as important as knowing when to go after one, right? And I I just had this knowing that it's time to just hopefully, God willing, use everything I've gone through to help hopefully be of service to somebody else. And so I sat in my house all alone and uh sobbed my eyes out and binge ate Lucky Charms and wrote every word in the 80,000 words in the book. And

how are you always calm? Are you always so I feel like you're the most soothing

like you are. You're relaxing. so relaxing and yeah like such a gentle positive energy. It's so love. Is that always

I mean I think I'm the kind of person where I always show up loving. Um, I'm probably always underestimated for that reason because like inside I'm like so uh on fire. Uh, but like I don't just I don't waste a second of my life uh judging or you know what I'm saying? Like I just like

I mean we have no judgment over here. We don't believe no judgment. Ladies and gentlemen, rock this house and welcome to the stage K Le. [screaming] JAMIE Karn Le.

Every single one of us has had someone tell us we're not enough. Every single one of us has had someone say words to us that

Questions about this episode

Who speaks in "This Story Will Make You Believe in Yourself Again | Jamie Kern Lima"?

Jamie Kern Lima (Guest), Ed Mylett (Host).

What is "This Story Will Make You Believe in Yourself Again | Jamie Kern Lima" about?

Jamie Kern Lima shares her personal journey of overcoming struggles, particularly her battle with a skin condition that affected her career as a news anchor. She emphasizes that these setbacks can actually serve as pivotal setups for achieving one's dreams, encouraging others to view their challenges as potential pathways to success rather than disqualifications.

What is mentioned in this Jamie Kern Lima episode?

18 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including IT Cosmetics, Denny's, Big Ed, QVC, rejection tolerance, Believe It. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "This Story Will Make You Believe in Yourself Again | Jamie Kern Lima"?

The episode runs 1 h 23 min; the transcript is about 16,545 words in 187 timestamped sections.

More from Jamie Kern Lima

About this transcript: the episode's spoken words as captioned on YouTube, split into timestamped sections. Reclip.Me locates every person, work and idea in the text, keeps the time it is first named, and quotes the words around it verbatim. Last updated January 24, 2026.