The Power of a Wag: How One Tail Wag Can Save a Human Life | The Dogist

What this episode is about

The discussion highlights the profound emotional connection between humans and dogs, emphasizing how a dog's presence can alleviate stress and provide unspoken comfort without needing verbal communication. It also touches on the importance of companionship in addressing mental health stigmas, showcasing how dogs instinctively support their owners without requiring them to ask for help.

Key takeaways

• Dogs are the unsung therapists—no questions asked, just love and a wagging tail to heal you.
• In a world of stigma, dogs are the ultimate companions—no hand-raising needed for love and support.
• Your dog knows you better than most humans; they excel at turning stress into paw-sitivity with a single glance.
• Forget small talk! With dogs, every conversation opens up to candid stories and genuine connections.
• A dog transforms you from 'individual' to 'neighborhood socialite'—one pee break at a time!

Who speaks in this episode?

• Elias Wise Friedman (Guest)

What is discussed, and when

1. 0:00 – 5:00: Elias Wise Friedman, Humans of New York
2. 5:00 – 10:00: This Dog Will Change Your Life, Bentley
3. 10:00 – 15:00: Bentley
4. 15:00 – 20:00: Bentley
5. 25:00 – 30:00: Chrissy Beckles, Bentley
6. 30:00 – 35:00: Bentley
7. 40:00 – 43:36: Elias Wise Friedman, This Dog Will Change Your Life

Notable quotes from "The Power of a Wag: How One Tail Wag Can Save a Human Life | The Dogist"

• I am absolutely thrilled today to welcome Elias Freriedman to Passion.

  about Elias Wise Friedman · at 1:23

• In brand strategy at an agency was part of a layoff and decided to dust off my camera and was inspired by Humans of New York and the Storiuralist, those street photography…

  about Humans of New York · at 2:30

• Today we are talking about your brand new book, This Dog Will Change Your Life. and you're already a New York Times bestselling author, so it shows you how much these stories resonate. On.

  about This Dog Will Change Your Life · at 7:49

• Yeah. I have to say when people meet Bentley who I've been walking around for a lot longer now, I'm never sure if they're reading the dogs or me. And it's it's kind of funny thing because I think.

  about Bentley · at 26:08

• Absolutely. I did want to go back to the rescues for a second because one of the things that you wrote about was Chrissy Beckles and the Sato Project and I wanted to highlight that. What does her.

  about Chrissy Beckles · at 27:15

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

People

• Elias Wise Friedman — Person · Main guest · 3 mentions · first at 1:26
  Interview subject; photographer/author behind The Dogist discussing dogs’ social and mental-health impact, rescue work, and his book.
• Chrissy Beckles — Person · Referenced rescue leader / case study · 2 mentions · first at 27:22
  Cited as an example of the grit required for real-world dog rescue through her work with the Sato Project in Puerto Rico.

Books & papers

• This Dog Will Change Your Life — Book · Primary recommendation · 2 mentions · first at 7:51
  The book is the main focus of the interview, discussing the impact of dogs on human lives.

Companies & orgs

• Humans of New York — Company · Referenced work · 1 mention · first at 2:37
  Mentioned as an inspiration for the Dogist project.

Products & tech

• Bentley — Product · Case study · 7 mentions · first at 5:21
  Bentley is the host's dog, used as an example of how dogs can change lives.

Full transcript with timestamps

0:00 dog doesn't have to ask you a question of like, "How are you doing?" Just being in their presence. They have an ability to listen and sense the way you're feeling. And whether it's eye contact, touch, warmth, letting you connect with them, there's just something that it has a powerful way of making you feel better and deescalating and relieving stress. They're the best listeners and even though they don't speak to you, they know exactly what to say. There's also a stigma around mental health. Not everyone's going to raise their hand and say, "I need help." So, with a dog, you don't have to raise your hand. They just show up for you.

0:36 Welcome to Passion Struck. Hi, I'm your host, John Arm. And on the show, we decipher the secrets, tips, and guidance of the world's most inspiring people and turn their wisdom into practical advice for you and those around you. Our mission is to help you unlock the power of intentionality so that you can become the best version of yourself. If you're new to the show, I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays. We have long- form interviews the rest of the week with guests ranging from astronauts to authors CEOs creators innovators scientists, military leaders, visionaries, and athletes. Now, let's go out there and become passionruck.

1:24 I am absolutely thrilled today to welcome Elias Freriedman to Passion. Welcome Elias. How are you?

1:31 I'm great. How are you doing? I am doing fantastic and I've been so excited about this interview because I absolutely love dogs. And for those who are tuning in, you are the dogist. So I thought I would start there. You have grown this dog brand on the internet to now over 11 million founders. How did this journey begin for you?

1:56 My origin story I think would have to date back to when I was a kid. There's a picture of me in 1988 being licked by my grandmother's dog Oreo like on the face and you can see a big smile on my face. So probably that was the very beginning of me really loving dogs and since then I developed love for photography and but didn't know exactly what to do with my creative spirit and coming from the family of two physicians the first thought was oh maybe I'll be a doctor but I moved to New York City was working in brand strategy at an agency was part of a layoff and decided to dust off my camera and was inspired by Humans of New York and the Storiuralist, those street photography blogs, and it said, "Well, no one's doing this for dogs." And it seemed like a bit of a joke at the time because it's like, well, who's going to take dog photography so seriously? But I was like, I will.

2:56 And so, long story short, the rest is history. 11 years later, 50,000 dogs photographed. I'm not I'm in retrospect I'm not surprised people love the project but at the time it was a little bit wild.

3:09 I have to ask do you remember the first dog you maybe photographed where you thought this is so much bigger than a hobby. It's really my life's calling.

3:20 Well I think before I started the dogist I was like I don't know like an unveiled artist. I knew that I love dogs but I wasn't ready to create a whole project around it. But I was encouraged by other friends in the tech space in New York City and these sort of like aha moments like the name the dogists. It's like someone who dogs. And I remember photographing a Frenchie in Williamsburg and he said, "What's this for?" And I said, "The dog." And so maybe that was one of the first moments. The first picture posted to the dog was a boxer I met in Vienna. is the basis of the dogist logo.

4:03 But yeah, I think someone this project is like every everyone's a dog photographer. This is something that the world needs, right? Especially in these times of divisiveness and stress and shocking things that happen. Dogs are the antidote to that. So, I felt like we needed this project. I missed having a dog. And dogs are one of the few things people want to talk about their dogs. If I'm stopping people on the street, they're like, I don't want to talk about myself or I don't want to talk about my kids. Those are too they're different.

4:41 But when you ask about their dog, they just completely open up and they'll tell you like the most candid sometimes embarrassing story right off the bat. And that's like a refreshing thing in today's world to just have someone like completely relax and just tell you an honest authentic story. It does mean so much. And I'm wearing a shirt today that says I matter. And I think more and more of us just stay in our houses these days or our offices and we're not getting out and we're not connecting. So my whole message with this podcast is that you matter. and we just moved into a new neighborhood and we were walking the dog that we've had for a while, Bentley. We immediately encountered other people walking dogs and other neighbors. And so it really is a nice extension to your life because without Bentley, I wouldn't have met these 15 to 20 new neighbors throughout the neighborhood. might have met my next

5:41 door neighbors, but certainly wouldn't have had more invested conversations with other neighbors who we pass along the way.

5:49 They're like a force of socialization. The thing I've been saying recently is before you get a dog, you know your neighbor. And after you get a dog, you know your neighborhood. Dogs are amazing social butterflies, right? They want to meet everyone. They want to sniff butts and they have to pee three times a day or more. And if you have to take them for a walk, then they will introduce you to everyone that you come across. And sometimes those connections are very meaningful. Well, dogs seem to be everywhere in our lives like we were just talking about, but you seem to see them differently than most of us do. What do you look for when you raise the lens?

6:32 It's a good question. I think I'm looking for something that stands out. I'm I will always be a photographer. So, I'm looking for something with visual interest, whether it's a rare breed of dog, a unique looking dog, someone's crazy outfit. Maybe the light is just right. Maybe there it's like a scene. The dog's in a bag. Dogs in a stroller. People are having brunch and the dog is by the table. something that represents something about life. And I'm, of course, I'm always interested in conveying it through the dog's perspective.

7:13 So, I'm always getting down to the dog's level, focusing on the dog, but always am interested in showing the context through which they're living their life. Yeah. People obviously who want to be have their dog on the dogest, that's like one of their questions is like, how do you choose your subjects? And it is a bit random because I will shoot once or twice a week and we'll gather I'll meet seven to 10 dogs on each outing. But it's a little bit of a f I don't know fate or I say every dog has its day. Today we are talking about your brand new book, This Dog Will Change Your Life. and you're already a New York Times bestselling author, so it shows you how much these stories resonate. On Passion Struck, the show, we tend to balance science and story, and your book opens up with both. Why did you go into Levi Strauss and Groucho?

8:13 I think they're hilarious examples of like how we represent dogs in our culture. What was the Groucho quote? It's inside of a dog. You can't what was it? You can't read. I forget exactly. But yeah, I just felt like they were good representative examples of how dogs are pervasive throughout our culture and part of the fabric of our society. They absolutely are. And I thought it was interesting that you could have jumped directly into street stories and about the things that you do when you're out there photographing these dogs, but instead you start with the question, what is a dog? Why define it first? I think a lot of people think of their dog as a family member, as a best friend, and those things are true, but they are animals just like we are. And so understanding where they come from, how they evolved, how they came to be. We created dogs.

9:19 Unlike other types of pets, cats, turtles, they are less domesticated compared to dogs. We selectively bred dogs over hundreds, thousands of years to be what we want them to be. I like to think of this idea of like a wild pug. There's no such thing as a wild pug. And so each of these dogs are a representation of us in all their forms. Big, little, lap dogs, great Danes. And so understanding the origin of dogs, I think, is important to fully understanding them.

10:02 I had to jump away for a second because this little one is our new addition. Her name is Luma for those who are watching. And she is 5 months old, but she's only 10 days new to us. And I have trained my lab over the years to when I'm filming, he goes into another room, sits in his bed, knows what I'm doing, and doesn't say a pee. She is very distractable right now. So, she is making it harder to do these interviews until I train her more.

10:32 But, yeah. So, this is Luma. This is Luma. And what's her back story? She's like a Chihuahua mix or

10:38 She's a Chihuahua Terrier mix. Cute. And what's her backtory? Is she from certain part of the country or? Her backstory is my my wife's dog Gibbs passed away in January and she lived long life, 16 years,

10:57 and we were looking for a new addition to the family, keep Bentley more alive and alert as he gets older along with us. So, we were struggling to find a new dog and my wife learned about this group that was having a big event because they found a person who was hoarding dogs and they had over 40 different dogs on their property. And she happened to be one of two or three litters that they discovered on the property. And when we went to the event, she came right up to all of us and we just couldn't get her out of her mind. Luckily, we were able to get her and the rest is history.

11:37 Yeah, she crawled into your heart and wouldn't leave. That's how it can happen.

11:43 But man, it's been a long time since I've had a puppy, so it's a little bit getting used to training them again. [clears throat]

11:48 Of course, it's a fun phase. I rescued my dog Elsa when she was basically an adult or about one years old. So, I didn't get to do the puppy phase with Elsa, and part of me wishes I could have, but also I know puppies are a lot of work.

12:06 That is true. So, we're still trying to potty trainer horse. Well, one of the things you write about in the book is you say that dogs are almost all about light, and that really struck me. What does that mean to you? I think dogs have an innate positivity about them. I spoke with someone recently who has who takes care of a dog who whose hind legs don't work and has wheels to get around and she'd said that the dogs don't have this thought that we do of what if I fail. Dogs, they just look towards the future. They live in the present moment. They don't dwell on the past and what their shortcomings are and they just say like, "How do I do this? Let's do this." Even if it's just getting a treat from across the room. [clears throat] They're not thinking, "Oh, well was me.

13:06 If only I were XYZ. If only I were different." They just focus on the now. And so I think through that virtue and being around dogs, they live as this light, as you're saying, this source of motivation, of encouragement. Dogs aren't judgmental of themselves. They're not judgmental of others. They don't care about what you look like, what kind of car you drive. They give they lead with trust. They don't lead with doubt. And so as humans, people with we have an ego we have to struggle with and we are often at odds with one another. And what for whatever reason those things exist, I think they don't always serve us. And by being around dogs, by seeing the way they behave, even without spoken language, we become more like them. And I think that was a good thing.

14:13 I completely agree with you. I know one of the things with Bentley when he looks at me sometimes I feel like he's peering into my soul. And it's crazy how much you can just feel how much they love you, how much they care for you, which is something you often don't get from the human experience.

14:33 Yeah. And when you say peering into your soul, it's like it a lot of it comes down to direct eye contact. Like throughout your average day, you could probably even with the people closest to you, the amount of like direct eye contact you have

14:49 gets less and less every day. You have 5 seconds with a barista, you have 30 seconds with your wife. Whereas dogs are incredibly generous with their eye contact. you come home, they stare into your soul like you're saying. And [clears throat] I think as humans, we crave that and we're missing that more and more. The ability as we work remotely as we're on a podcast over a Zoom channel and this counts for something, but it's not quite the same as being in the same being right next to someone and some a dog the way a dog looks at you is just we don't get that much anymore. And so it's important they remind us that we matter like your shirt says and that feeling of love that we get through eye contact is priceless. It reminds me of something that you wrote about in the book. You suggest that there's no dogs without humans, but I think it's maybe no humanity without dogs. I do think they bring out the best

15:51 in humans. And yeah, just like when you walk around the street with your dog, you're talking about meeting new people. You probably wouldn't have met them otherwise. Who knows if your ideologies align like whether you would have struck up a conversation with this person otherwise. The dogs don't ask these questions. They just have a magnetism, a gravity about everything they do in attracting other people, in attracting love, connection. I think we take it for granted. It's something that we've gotten used to living with a dog. But my goal with this book and really the whole dog project, everything I'm doing is to deepen our appreciation for dogs and help them live better lives and hopefully save a number as many as possible from living life in a shelter.

16:44 That's why we always tend to rescue our dogs. My my other dog, Bentley, came from Alabama originally, and he had a sister and that sister was really mean to him [clears throat] in many ways. But the parents, for whatever reason before I had them, moved to a place, not sure why people do this, where they wouldn't allow them to have big dogs like a lab. And so they gave them to a shelter, which became a kill shelter. And so we were able to to find Bentley from a lab rescue organization and a and a great foster mom. But it does really sometimes make me think as much love as dogs bring to you, how sometimes we treat them in the exact opposite way that they show the love to us that so many of us feel who love them.

17:42 Yeah, it's a dark part of reality and being a human is abandoning things that we once cared about or I remember being in Texas arriving at their municipal shelter, city shelter, and I got there at 9:00 a.m. and there's already a line of people waiting to relinquish their dogs to surrender them for whatever reason. And of course your instinct is to judge them. And I guess you can, but people may be struggling financially healthwise. It's just an unfortunate thing. And in places where there's overpopulation around the country, especially in the south, they unfortunately have to do tooth base based euthanasia, which is unfortunate. And a lot of it has to do with overbreeding. And we don't have to get into all the details of that, but I just think it's a noble thing if you're interested in getting a dog to at least consider getting one from a shelter because dogs aren't meant to languish in

18:49 small cages and be not social. They belong with their people in a family. Even going to a shelter and just seeing it for yourself, I think is a meaningful thing to do. As someone who loves dogs,

19:04 it is so sad to go to those facilities where they're trying to breed purebreds and you see the dogs in all the cages and they just look miserable. And this is something that you bring up in the book 16 Basil Breeds and you call breeds human inventions. Why is this important to for the listeners to understand about this breeding and making sense of modern dogs and what comes about with the responsibilities we have of breeding these human inventions? I think uh to make a distinction, not the practice of breeding a responsibly breeding a dog that you care about, for example, like dog shows for example.

19:52 There is a best practice and these people are not responsible for the overpopulation in shelters. They're not making money out of this. They're barely breaking even. They are breeding a breed. They love to keep it alive, a legacy. Whether it's a hunting dog a it's the very 100 to 200 purebred breeds out there are interesting and I think worth preserving. It's a fascinating thing. The issue comes when you have someone who's trying to make money off of a trend of a breed's popularity. Like a celebrity gets a dog and then everyone wants one of those. is this impulsive fashiony phenomenon. And the hallmarks of a puppy mail, if you will, is the ability to get a dog next weekend quickly with a credit card without any sort of the breeder looking into your background or interviewing you at all and without any accountability as if that the breeder is not keeping up with you. Those are the dogs that can

20:58 end up in a shelter. And so I just want to make that distinction off the bat is that if you decide that you really want a specific breed, it you need to make sure to do a lot of research and find a breeder that is doing it with love and a care for preserving their breed, not to make money. And it should take a year, it should take at least six months for you to get a dog if that's the path you want to go down. But yeah, in terms of the basil breed, so there's I don't know how many there were 16 or 11.

21:35 16. 16. Yeah. So there's basically the first dogs that were that we created the first breeds

21:44 and it's like is it a Sheba Enu? A lot of them were Asian. Started in Asia. The Kanan dog in I guess Africa. And that's just what all of our dogs today have a bit of in them. If you do any of these DNA tests, you'll see there's always a sliver of cow in every dog. And so it's just interesting history lesson if you look at the breed that they all started with their select few. Well, one of the things that you just mentioned was dog shows, and you've been shooting Westminster, as I understand it, for a decade. What do you think dog shows reveal about us, not just the dogs?

22:37 I think they're of the variety of types of dogs they are in the most. These are called confirmation shows as meaning that the dogs there's a very specific description of what each breed should be quote should be and so the dogs that conform to that the most are should be the ones that win. So you have blood hounds, you have Irish setters, you have Newfoundlands, you have poodles, pugs, shisus, bejons, the list goes on and on. And so each of the what they call them fancier, dog fancers have chosen a breed that they love and have dedicated their life to showing them in this elite level.

23:27 Westminster Dog Show Cruffs in England and the National Dog Show in Pennsylvania to try and preserve their breed and to create the epitome of what these breed standards are. And a lot of them will also a lot of the corgis that show up are actually working dogs. They're right off the farm chasing cattle one day and then walking around a show ring the next. And so it's a very niche kind of the whole thing is a bit wild like for anyone who's seen the movie best in show. I remember asking one of the handlers and mentioning that to him and he was like oh the documentary and I said no that's like a mockumentary no that's a documentary like the the sort of stereotypes that are portrayed in there have some truth to them. There's each breed has its own sort of like variety of people. Poodle people, pug people, shizu people. It's it's just like a interesting expression of our diversity and humanity. And the dogs there are a

24:35 representation of that. Yeah. Well, speaking of people and their dogs, I want to talk about doppelgangers. There is so much truth that you walk around and it does seem oftenimes like people look like they're dogs. What do you think that says about identity or belonging?

24:57 I think there we want to express a love towards our dogs and doing that in a visual way is one way of doing that. I I often think some people obviously will choose a breed with an aesthetic, meet a dog that matches their aesthetic, whether it's maybe their hair or the way they think of themselves or interesting markings on them. And so it can often start with a dog, but then sometimes it starts with a dog and then the person starts to dress like the dog. So it's funny like Elsa is like all white with a little caramel toasting on the top. And so when my wife Sam comes out and she's dressed in all white, I was like, "Oh, this is awkward." Like you guys are both wearing the same thing.

25:40 So I think it can go both ways, whether it starts with the person looking for aspects of themsel in a dog or the person starts to mirror their dog. And I think it's great like why not when I'm walking around and I see that like juxtaposition of a person that matches their dog. It's like fascinating and I think it's a beautiful expression. Yeah. I have to say when people meet Bentley who I've been walking around for a lot longer now, I'm never sure if they're reading the dogs or me. And it's it's kind of funny thing because I think Bentley does pick up a lot of my personality. I I think he's introspective

26:28 but but really caring. He gets along with everyone, humans and dogs. Nothing seems to phase him. And it is so interesting how our dogs do resemble us. Not sure yet who Luma represents and I'm sure her personality will evolve over the next two to three months. Well, I like to think that everyone finds their dog. Whether it's cosmic forces or luck, we end up with dogs that are like us in some way and we become more like each other. Your dog sees your behavior, your energy, you see your dog's energy, and you end up evolving in some way to the next version of yourself.

27:12 And mostly, I think in a very positive way. Absolutely. I did want to go back to the rescues for a second because one of the things that you wrote about was Chrissy Beckles and the Sato Project and I wanted to highlight that. What does her grit teach us about what real rescue requires? I think a lot of people view rescue or volunteering for a rescue as like holding puppies or getting to foster a puppy, but the reality is that you got to get your hands dirty. Like I remember Chrissy was doing a transport at an airport. Dogs were coming off of a plane and someone asked like, "How can I help?

27:55 I really want to help out for the next transport." and she said, "Oh, well, you can start by cleaning the crap out of these cages." Like puppy poop. And the look on her face was like, you can see that was not what she was expecting. And so the grit you're talking about is getting her hands dirty. None of the actual dog rescue is glamorous. The reality is that in my trip down to Puerto Rico, spending time with Chrissy, we got into a jeep. We go to a beach that is unfortunately nicknamed dead dog beach because it's the place people go in shame to drop their dogs off and drive back home and try and forget about them. We go to this beach and there's dogs living in a bush, often emaciated, covered in ticks and other maladies, other illnesses they might have, mange.

28:46 And her job is to, and mind you, Chrissy is like allergic to dogs, of course. And her job is to lure these dogs who are maybe afraid of humans with food. She basically puts food out and to try and get these puppies off of the beach and into a better life. And so not everyone can do that and that's not how people by the time the dog is transported to New York City and is on a is in a adoption van in Columbus Circle and is then adopted by a well-off family and it's going to live a nice life in its brownstone in Brooklyn. That is the goal. But it didn't start that way. It's not the way this that's not the way these dogs lives started. And so just having an appreciation for all the work it takes to rescue these dogs often from the brink of death. A lot of these dogs literally I and I've seen the worst of it and the unfortunate reality of having to dogs not make it. And so someone's got to do this work and it's

29:58 almost always these like badass women often who are have tattoos and Chris who's a boxer. That was the first time I met her was seeing her box in a ring. There's just something like you need like you're saying there's this grit about them.

30:18 So I wanted to talk about another area. One of the biggest things that Bentley has helped me with, and he is a service dog, is he's helped me regulate my experience with trauma. I know for a lot of veterans who have dogs and other people who have experienced trauma, dogs can be a huge influence in helping you regulate PTSD and other things that have happened. What patterns do you see in dogs as potentially co-regulators and helping people who experience anxiety or mental health issues? Yeah, I think that this is like a fascinating aspect of I've done a lot of series with working service dog organizations for veterans with PTSD, various types of PTSD. And it's just incredible the power that these dogs have that no other medication therapy can really match. And this is something that I've been trying to understand. Even yesterday I was at a Temple University hospital with a organization called Crisis Response

31:26 Kines and they basically go into settings where a disaster or tragedy has happened. There's a shooting, a natural disaster. And so this was a hospital where they are going to visit nurses who are experience something traumatic 10 times a day because they're in an emergency room. And there's just this unique ability for them to interact with a dog and the dog doesn't have to ask you a question like how are you doing? just being in their presence and they have an ability to listen and sense the way you're feeling and whether it's eye contact, touch, warmth, letting you connect with them, there's just something that it has a powerful way of making you feel better and deescalating and relieving stress.

32:28 They're the best listeners and even though they don't speak to you, they know exactly what to say. And there's also a stigma around mental health. Not everyone's going to raise their hand and say, "I need help." So with a dog, you don't have to raise your hand. They just show up for you. And whether you are aware of the fact that you are feeling down or feeling like the trauma is having a grip on you, you you the dogs just make you feel better. And yeah, it's a unique thing. It's it's something that I think about a lot.

33:08 There's this I met with a veteran a couple years ago that was in the Marine Corps and he was talking about how his dog he said he wouldn't be around here if it wouldn't be around if it weren't for his dog. And I had heard that before. I wasn't sure if what he really meant and he was talking about how many more veterans commit suicide every day and how many more of them would still be around if they had had dogs. And that's like a statistic that's theoretical that I remember leaving towards the end of this my time that day speaking with his wife and just asking her like, "Has he ever talked to you about any of his experiences serving?"

33:49 And she said, "No, he's never talked to me about anything. I know nothing about his experience." And that just was like shows you that dogs his dog was there for him and his dog listens. His dog is the one that hears his stories and saved his life literally because dogs can be there for in ways that people can't. Even if you want them to be, he felt like he didn't want to burden his wife with things that he suffers with. And so, like, how do you quantify that?

34:22 That's a really important topic. A couple years ago, I had a Naval Academy classmate of mine, Chuck Smith, on the show. And Chuck did this TED talk that went viral about veteran suicide. And if you know anything about the TED organization, before you come on to speak, they do a ton of validation work, making sure that whatever you're going to put on stage is accurate. And

34:46 when you think about Yeah. When you think about the war on terror, the war itself resulted in somewhere around 5,000 fatalities. But when you look at the suicides during that same period of veterans who took their lives outside of conflict, the numbers are staggering. It's like 145,000. Um, if you just uh take that example you just gave, how many of those lives could have been saved if they might have had a dog companion in their life who gave them the vehicle of comfort that they couldn't find elsewhere? So, I just bring that up because I think it's important.

35:27 Yeah. Yeah. And a lot of veterans think that they don't deserve one or someone else deserves it more than them. That's just built into the mentality of serving and being an officer and you you think that your job is to help others. I don't need help. There's but people are human. They're not robots, right? And it's hard to go back to a civilian life and live the rest of your life out after seeing so much and experiencing these traumas. And part of the work I part of what I want to encourage in showing these stories is to hopefully help some people who are struggling to feel comfortable and like they deserve to have a dog.

36:12 I want to bring this back to something lighter for a moment. You have interviewed or I shouldn't say interviewed. You've done photographs with thousands of strangers, but also some wellrecoognized people like Naomi Watts and Chris Rock. But I wanted to focus in on one in particular. My aunt Pat grew up with Bill Murray. She went to elementary school with them starting in kindergarten. And in fact, he sometimes comes back to his grade school preunions, believe it or not.

36:49 Of course, very one time she was an attorney during her career and one time she left the office and she was walking down the street and you can imagine you're in Chicago when all of a sudden someone grabs you from behind and starts twirling you around. Well, it happened to be Bill Murray, which she had seen in over a decade at that point, but I have a friend who lives in Charleston who tells me Bill shows up unexpectedly at different events from time to time.

37:20 What was it like shooting with Bill? Do you remember anything from it? I mean, yeah, it was unreal. I grew up watching Catty Shack. I was Starruck myself and he's the ultimate character. everything you say. He's like cracking like the perfect joke. And he's a dog lover as well. No surprise. He's had dogs over the years. And he had been doing this press junket for the movie Friends all day. He was doing interviews and so he's probably a bit tired. But I remember he came out and we had about 20 minutes to shoot this. He was going to help me find dogs on the street and I could just see when we described what we were doing. you're going to help us find dogs. He's like, "Really? This is great.

38:04 I love this concept." And so he lit up and Naomi lit up and every dog that we met, you could see his curiosity and his excitement peak. And that was awesome to see someone who has had so much experience doing all types of things, an incredible life he's led, to see him have this childlike curiosity. And I was so glad that I could show him what it's like to be the dogest, to live my life. And through the rest of the week, he would was going on interview shows. He was on Howard Stern talking about his movie promoting that. But he kept bringing up the dog. He kept bringing up the dogist. He's to Howard, have you heard of the dogist?

38:49 And he's like, "No, I haven't." And oh, it's this guy. He walks around with cameras and he says, "May I take a photo of your dog?" And so even this 20 minute half an hour experience stuck with him. And that is really a testament to ultimately the power of dogs to change our lives to make us appreciate everyone more. You can watch this video. It's still pinned to my Instagram, but just hearing the way people talk about their dogs, you could tell Bill sensed that this was something meaningful and it moved him. And that is my goal in general, not just to move people who are like Bill Murray and extremely famous, but everyone who loves dogs and wants to feel more connected to them. I'm glad you shared that because as we mentioned at the beginning, you've built a 11 million person community and when I think about that's reach and responsibility and I'm sure Bill Murray on that show helped increase that reach but platforms keep

39:58 shifting, technology keeps shifting. How do you adapt without losing the core mission and what's at the heart of it which you just described?

40:08 I think I consider myself to be an artist. I started as a photographer, slowly evolved into through writing about dogs in short form to now being an author and having published my first written narrative book. And every day on the various platforms, Instagram, Tik Tok, you have to evolve your art. And so it's become much more video-based. you're competing to get the algorithm decides how much how much of your audience gets to see your work at this point. So there's a lot of forces at play and it's part of the challenge to keep up with it instead of complaining about it or being stagnant. you have to just keep changing and realizing that these tools can help spread your message even more. And so if my goal is to be a canine evangelist, a voice for dogs to help people deepen their appreciation for not just their dogs, but dogs in general.

41:22 just keeping up with if my platforms are social media and of course books and just being out in person, doing my best to keep up with it. And I also have various people that I work with who make it all possible as well. If I'm a captain of a ship, you know, it need support.

41:45 Elias, I have one final question for you. Passion struck is about mattering and intentional living and dogs model both. If every listener today change one behavior with their dog, what should it be? I think from your perspective it would be to sit with them on the couch and give them some time, dedicated time without your phone and just feel what it's like to be present with your dog because that's how they experience life is in the present moment. And for your dog's sake, when you're out on your next walk, let them sniff a little longer.

42:28 That's something that they find interesting. The way I think of it is if you pull your dog away from a good scent, it's like taking a good book out of their hands. This is the way the dogs experience the world through scents. For your sake, take a pause and be present with your dog for a few minutes every day. And for your dog's sake, let them sniff that thing a little longer.

42:50 And Elias, people want to learn more about you. Where's the best place for them to do and the book and your social presence? Well, the book is This Dog Will Change Your Life. It's available online and every local bookstore hopefully at least a few copies and online on social media at the dog. It's the D O G I S T. Yeah, that's where to find me.

43:13 Well, Elias, thank you so much for joining us. I love to talk about dogs, so this was a real pleasure for me.

43:19 Likewise. You're a dog guy, so you get it.

Questions about this episode

Who speaks in "The Power of a Wag: How One Tail Wag Can Save a Human Life | The Dogist"?

Elias Wise Friedman (Guest).

What is "The Power of a Wag: How One Tail Wag Can Save a Human Life | The Dogist" about?

The discussion highlights the profound emotional connection between humans and dogs, emphasizing how a dog's presence can alleviate stress and provide unspoken comfort without needing verbal communication. It also touches on the importance of companionship in addressing mental health stigmas, showcasing how dogs instinctively support their owners without requiring them to ask for help.

What is mentioned in this John R. Miles episode?

5 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including Elias Wise Friedman, This Dog Will Change Your Life, Bentley, Chrissy Beckles, Humans of New York. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "The Power of a Wag: How One Tail Wag Can Save a Human Life | The Dogist"?

The episode runs 44 min; the transcript is about 6,772 words in 68 timestamped sections.

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