STAFF PICKS is 21 /// Last Stream on The Left /// December 9th, 2025

What this episode is about

The content captures a humorous and nostalgic conversation about the experiences and challenges of turning 21, with participants recounting their own memorable (and often chaotic) birthday celebrations. Key points include reflections on questionable bar choices, unique drink concoctions, and the camaraderie shared during the transition into adulthood.

Key takeaways

• Turning 21: The legal age where mistakes require plastic trash cans and drunk surrealism.
• Beware the Frankenstein shot: It's as mysterious as its creator's conscience.
• Cats and rock bands: Felines inspire insta-legends, but their odors haunt dreams.
• Not all heroes wear capes; some babysit friends in dire dazed need.
• Staff picks grow: from cute ideas to cunning contenders disturbing the peace.

Who speaks in this episode?

• Henry Zebrowski (Host) · 24 min speaking
• Marcus Parks (Host) · 17 min speaking
• Eddie Tunes (Host) · 14 min speaking
• Ian (staff member) (Guest) · 1 min speaking
• Holden (staff member) (Guest) · 1 min speaking
• Eric (staff member) (Guest) · 1 min speaking

What is discussed, and when

1. 0:00 – 10:00: Staff Picks, Axel Henry, Florida State, Frankenstein shot
2. 10:00 – 20:00: raccoon, GARBAGE PLATE, Rochester, Rochester garbage plate
3. 20:00 – 30:00: glass eye, Fast Eddie, Aurora James, David Oscar Marcus
4. 30:00 – 40:00: Colonel William Anthony Holden, Janis Ian, Axel Henry, Fast Eddie
5. 40:00 – 50:00: Autism, Bangladesh, Autism test, McFaren
6. 50:00 – 1:00:00: Lacy Michelle, Traffic Affirmations, Raccoon chandelier, raccoon
7. 1:00:00 – 1:02:32: Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., William Howard Taft, Arbor Day, Martin Luther King

Notable quotes from "STAFF PICKS is 21 /// Last Stream on The Left /// December 9th, 2025"

• Yes, that's what it was. No, you came back and I had to constantly keep checking. We just put Henry in his bed.

  about Axel Henry · at 4:06

• That's right. This week we have all of our staff bringing us their best videos.

  about Staff Picks · at 4:56

• Yeah. Also jacket. I was just so afraid that it wasn't me and Eddie when we went into that store in Detroit.

  about Fast Eddie · at 13:17

• Yeah, but Traffic Affirmations [ __ ] took that hardcore.

  about Traffic Affirmations · at 14:33

• It's a big pile of Rochester garbage plate.

  about GARBAGE PLATE · at 16:50

• I don't know how the heck this just happened. There's a cat inside my Christmas tree. I swear if you knock down any of my glass ornaments, cat, get.

  about Raccoon chandelier · at 17:37

• I guess heads are just eye holders. Aam Racers asks, Marcus, how did your dad lose his eye? It was in a bet.

  about David Oscar Marcus · at 27:10

• All right. Michelle wins with the cabbage enthusiast. Of course. And now comes the most devious test of our audience I have ever seen. Honestly, who will be the holiday employee of the.

  about Lacy Michelle · at 57:36

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

People

• Axel Henry — Person · Co-host / main speaker · 4 mentions · first at 4:10
  One of the primary voices driving the segment-by-segment reactions, jokes, and voting on staff-submitted videos; also referenced in personal anecdotes (21st birthday, credit).
• David Oscar Marcus — Person · Co-host / main speaker · 3 mentions · first at 27:14
  Active co-host in the staff-picks segment; provides commentary and is directly addressed by chat about his father’s eye patch.
• Fast Eddie — Person · Co-host / on-mic participant · 3 mentions · first at 20:59
  Regularly banters with the hosts, reacts to videos, and is referenced in past anecdotes (e.g., Detroit store, cruise fight).
• April — Person · Contest participant / submitter (Staff Picks contestant) · 3 mentions · first at 9:03
  April submitted the winning 'Traffic Affirmations' video; hosts comment positively on her submission and performance.
  [ __ ] We should do Oh, yeah. This is [ __ ] April with traffic affirmations and Adam with Quenton's affectation. Yo, I got that cassette tape. The cassette tape.
• Aurora James — Person · Staff participant / submitter · 5 mentions · first at 13:45
  Regular submitter/participant in the staff video contest; his video (lumberjack beer crush) was discussed and praised.
  Just three. Three in heat one. Holy [ __ ] [ __ ] guys. I'm actually kind of mad that those are all in one.
• Lacy Michelle — Person · Staff/community contributor (video submitter) · 4 mentions · first at 55:51
  Submitted the “cabbage enthusiast” video; wins a heat and is in the final bracket.
• Janis Ian — Person · Staff contributor / referenced participant · 3 mentions · first at 5:05
  Mentioned as a staff member who previously won a month and as the submitter/presenter of a dating-profile video in a later heat.
  Ian finally came in last month and won September.
• McFarren — Person · Guest/subject mentioned as a person in the transcript context · 1 mention
  Potential reference to a person name; possible misspelling needs confirmation to ensure correct identity
• McFaren — Person · Audience participant / staff-picks submitter · 3 mentions · first at 46:56
  Submitted the 'autism test' internet video that wins its heat and reaches the finals.
  We got Holden with Holiday Barf, Eric House of the Future, and McFaren with autism test.
• Rick Ross — Person · Referenced celebrity (appears in anecdote) · 2 mentions · first at 12:43
  Mentioned in an anecdote about someone returning from the BET Awards and meeting Rick Ross — used as a cultural reference in a story.
  All right. Goes to the BET Awards, comes back with Rick Ross. Rick Ross and the whole Posi. WE ALL GOT CONTACT on the set that day. Go over to Carrie with my little taper going to play it. Bam. Bam.
• Snoop Dogg — Person · Cultural reference · 1 mention · first at 2:54
  Mentioned in connection to a music video / partying anecdote (filling a fridge with 40s similar to a Snoop Dogg video).
  They took all the shelves out of the fridge and filled it with 40s, like the Snoop Dog video. It was a lot of fun.
• Samuel L. Jackson — Person · Referenced celebrity (film/wardrobe joke) · 1 mention · first at 14:19
  Referenced while joking about a “Jango” jacket and the speed of a turnaround; tied to Django Unchained context.
  This other guy brought A OH, NO. THERE AIN'T NOT A STONE [ __ ] IN THE HOUSE. DID THEY really give Samuel L that jacket that just says Jango across it? It's like a leather jacket with It was crazy.
• Diddy's prison wife — Person · Audience member / chat participant (username) · 1 mention · first at 19:49
  A chat username used for a joke and a comment about the raccoon video; also becomes a target of a riff about trauma.
  Yes, it's very northern Michigan. Very normal according to Elgrash. Diddy's prison wife says, For a second, I thought she murdered it and strung it up. Yeah, I was scared of that.
• P. Diddy — Person · Referenced celebrity · 1 mention · first at 19:49
  Mentioned in passing in chat/comments about prison / public image; used as topical cultural commentary.
  And straight up, Diddy ain't hiding anymore. He's just got a husband.
• Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. — Person · Referenced individual · 2 mentions · first at 5:05
  Mentioned in a humorous context about holiday celebrations.
  I'm doing Martin Luther King Jr. early this year. Finally.
• RFK Jr. / RK Jr. — Person · Referenced individual · 2 mentions · first at 45:41
  Mentioned in a humorous and critical context regarding his public image and actions.
  Did you see RFK Jr. doing those pull-ups. Can you imagine his disgusting [ __ ] ass doing 25 pull-ups and then getting on a plane next to you?
• Snoop Dog — Person · Referenced celebrity (music video reference) · 1 mention · first at 2:52
  Mentioned as a visual reference point for a fridge stocked with 40s, comparing it to a Snoop Dogg music video aesthetic.
  They did the thing where they filled they took all the shelves out of the fridge and filled it with 40s, like the Snoop Dog video. It was a lot of fun.
• Jamie Coo — Person · Referenced person (attendee) · 1 mention · first at 12:40
  Mentioned as someone present in an anecdote about going to the BET Awards and other social scenes.
• Mama Carrie — Person · Referenced person / anecdote listener · 1 mention · first at 12:51
  Named in a brief anecdote describing someone playing a cassette to 'Carrie'; context indicates a person present in a story.
  Back with Rick Ross. Rick Ross and the whole Posi. WE ALL GOT CONTACT on the set that day. Go over to Carrie with my little taper going to play it. Bam. Bam.
• Anthony Hamilton — Person · Referenced individual · 1 mention · first at 12:58
  Mentioned in the context of bringing a joint to a movie set.
  Bam. Okay, that's in the movie. And Anthony Hamilton brought in a joint that was just fantastic. And I took it home and I played. I This is the bomb.
• Elgrash — Person · Audience member / chat participant · 1 mention · first at 19:46
  Cited as a source for a regional norm claim ('northern Michigan'); appears to be a username rather than a public figure.
  Yes, it's very northern Michigan. Very normal according to Elgrash. Diddy's prison wife says, For a second, I thought she murdered it and strung it up. Yeah, I was scared of.
• Joan Glenn — Person · Cultural reference / visual ID · 1 mention · first at 41:08
  Mentioned jokingly when discussing a retro/futuristic clip of someone walking a dog (panel debated whether clip looked like John Glenn or a cosmonaut).
  It's so funny, Marcus. I thought it was John Glenn, too. I think it might be a cosmonaut.
• Sabrina Carpenter — Person · Referenced individual · 1 mention · first at 47:58
  Mentioned in the context of a discussion about modern music.
  No, I like the kid. No, no, that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that the kids just don't understand that Sabrina Carpenter is [ __ ] just goddamn what's her name from back in the day, man. They're all just sing the same.
• Michael Hutchkins — Person · Referenced individual · 1 mention · first at 51:40
  Mentioned in the context of a discussion about a band that resembled him.
  Yeah. I think they were playing an NXS song and the dude looked just like Michael Hutchkins.
• William Howard Taft — Person · Referenced individual · 1 mention · first at 1:00:55
  Mentioned in a humorous context about holiday celebrations.
  Yes. When William Howard Taft slides down the chimney with a bunch of gifts and cigars for the boys.
• Jamie (last name needed for clarification) — Person · Mentioned in a story about a past experience · 1 mention
  Clarifies which Jamie is being referred to in the context of the conversation
• Jamie Foxx — Person · Mentioned in relation to a story · 1 mention
  Clarifies which Jamie is being referred to in the context of the conversation
• Martin Luther King — Person · Referenced historical figure (holiday joke) · 1 mention · first at 1:01:02
  Mentioned as part of a bit about celebrating holidays early; not central to the episode’s main segment.
  I'm doing Martin Luther King Jr. early this year. Finally.
• Tony Box — Person · 9 mentions
• Colonel William Anthony Holden — Person · 4 mentions · first at 37:31
  Yes. Boston Ian Holden continues to fail.
• Klay Travis — Person · 3 mentions · first at 17:46
  In there. you guys are all disgusting. Heat, too. We got Kelsey with distracted driving. Travis raccoon chandelier. Surprisingly cute.
• Bolter Kelsey — Person · 2 mentions · first at 15:08
  What darkness is Kelsey bringing us today?
• Samuel L — Person · 1 mention · first at 14:21
  OH, NO. THERE AIN'T NOT A STONE [ __ ] IN THE HOUSE. DID THEY really give Samuel L that jacket that just says Jango across it? It's like a leather jacket with It was crazy.
• Richard Allen — Person · 1 mention · first at 21:16
  This is Richard Allen at the University of Iowa. This video demonstrates an evisceration in a patient with endoplamitis.
• Meline — Person · 1 mention · first at 30:05
  Meline eyeball removal. We all learned a lot. Mhm. Yeah.
• Curtis Sliwa ("Curtis Leewa") — Person · 1 mention · first at 31:23
  People were ready to make, but I do think that unfortunately that's what it was. It was a Curtis Leewa thing with the eyeball and the beer crush.
• Tor Johnson — Person · 1 mention · first at 41:26
  Come on, Benji. Let's go. No, that's Tor Johnson. Who's Tor Johnson? He's the wrestler that was in Plan N from outer space. They made him his face into one of the most popular Halloween masks of all time. That's Tor Johnson.
• Pylenol Maxine — Person · 1 mention · first at 45:23
  I love taking pylenol. I want my kids to be autistic. I am Pylenol Maxine. When I am pregnant, I will force my fetus to play Paradox strategy game.
• April — Person · 1 mention
• Ari Matty — Person · 1 mention

Companies & orgs

• Culver's — Company · Business focus · 1 mention · first at 24:02
  Mentioned in the context of a discussion about cheese curds and regional preferences.
  This is like Wow. Oh, you got Oh, Sean the Redhead got a bunch of cheese curds from Culver's.
• Boston Dynamics — Company · Business focus · 3 mentions · first at 5:19
  Mentioned in the context of a humorous comment about their robotics technology.
  Exactly. Hamburger helpless. Boston Dynamics wants this video buried, which is true. Yes. Yes. Jenny P. Yes.
• Florida State — Company · Incidental mention · 1 mention · first at 3:03
  Referenced in a personal story about a birthday celebration and university traditions.
  Went to poor Paul's and then I got a lot of alcohol in me and then I told the story on the show the Florida State they had a tradition where they would you'd go jump in the…
• University of Iowa — Company · Educational institution · 1 mention · first at 21:16
  Mentioned in the context of a medical video demonstrating an evisceration procedure.
  This is Richard Allen at the University of Iowa. This video demonstrates an evisceration in a patient with endoplamitis.
• Social Fox Brewing — Company · Business focus · 1 mention · first at 23:07
  Mentioned in the context of a question about their menu offerings.
  You guys join you guys have a French onion soup special or do you guys have like a go John like sort of Korean spicy bowl scenario?
• the library — Company · 1 mention · first at 1:43
  My 21st birthday was pretty similar to that. That it was weird. We went to this place called the library cuz it was the only bar in Leach that I wanted to go to that I hadn't…
• Poor Paul's — Company · 1 mention · first at 2:59
  That's really nice. It was very sweet of them. I remember we went to poor Paul's and then I got a lot of alcohol in me and then I told the story on the show the Florida State they had a tradition where they would you'd go jump.
• BET Awards — Company · 1 mention · first at 12:43
  All right. Goes to the BET Awards, comes back with Rick Ross. Rick Ross and the whole Posi. WE ALL GOT CONTACT on the set that day. Go over to Carrie with my little taper going to play it. Bam. Bam.
• Animal Control — Company · 1 mention · first at 18:41
  YEAH, CALL ANIMAL CONTROL, LADY. You shouldn't be doing this. It's going to bite the [ __ ] out of you.
• Photoshop — Company · 1 mention · first at 34:57
  He can't photoshop that [ __ ] He that guy those legs are easier for that guy to attain than it would be for him to learn how to Photoshop or talk to a woman properly.
• Crazy Town — Company · 1 mention · first at 35:17
  Henry sad dancing to Crazy Town. He's just saying he won't show himself [ __ ] you num nuts. No, I think that you heard it wrong. You numb nuts.
• Paradox strategy game — Company · 1 mention · first at 45:30
  Be autistic. I am Pylenol Maxine. When I am pregnant, I will force my fetus to play Paradox strategy game.
• Donqua Ginwa — Company · 1 mention · first at 46:07
  Courtesy of our good friends at Donqua Ginwa. All the Italian brain rot you can watch.
• Flight FM — Company · 1 mention · first at 48:07
  Flight FM [ __ ] man. All right, here we go. We took it out. McFaren took it with autism test. Of course, McFaren read the room.
• Stone Pony — Company · 1 mention · first at 49:22
  Eddie and I are not fighting it on side stories. I'm wearing I'm wearing a stone pony beanie.
• Stone Roses — Company · 1 mention · first at 52:19
  NO, it sounded Let's do it again. It sounded more like Stone Roses or like Happy Mondays. I That one was all over the place.
• Happy Mondays — Company · 1 mention · first at 52:21
  NO, it sounded Let's do it again. It sounded more like Stone Roses or like Happy Mondays. I That one was all over the place.
• Alexa — Company · 1 mention
• Epcot — Company · 1 mention
• Malvern Autumn Show — Company · 1 mention
• NXS (INXS) tribute band — Company · 1 mention
• Palantir ("Palunteer") — Company · 1 mention
• Vinmo (Venmo) — Company · 1 mention

Products & tech

• Staff Picks — Product · Segment / media_product · 5 mentions · first at 1:01
  Name of the recurring show segment where staff-submitted videos are shown and judged (the central format for much of the episode).
• Traffic Affirmations — Product · Submitted video / media_product · 4 mentions · first at 13:56
  A staff-submitted video entry described as a short filmed piece (an affirmation-style video) that won the episode's contest; repeatedly referenced by hosts as a standout media piece.
• Raccoon chandelier — Product · Submitted video / media_product · 4 mentions · first at 29:58
  A staff-submitted video (raccoon in a Christmas tree / chandelier) that was a finalist in the staff contest and discussed by hosts.
• Patreon — Product · Subscription service · 1 mention · first at 5:59
  Mentioned in the context of a humorous anecdote about subscription management.
  Difficult man says, I misjimed my Patreon subscription and my monthly money flow and almost missed it. Took out a $600 limit credit card just to not miss the staff mandate. Canceling it tomorrow. Good work. IT'S FREE MONEY.
• Patreon — Product · Incidental mention · 1 mention · first at 5:56
  Mentioned in a humorous context about subscription management.
  You sound like a difficult person. A difficult man says, I misjimed my Patreon subscription and my monthly money flow and almost missed it. Took out a $600 limit credit card just to not miss the staff mandate. Canceling it.
• Bartles and James — Product · Referenced beverage · 1 mention · first at 19:29
  Mentioned as alcohol consumed at parties (host anecdote) — cultural reference to the wine cooler brand.
  Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. or the raccoon broke in later on and made the trees home.
• Oxy — Product · Referenced substance (implied drug/medication) · 1 mention · first at 19:29
  Mentioned in passing as a possible substance involved in a raccoon/home anecdote; not promoted, used colloquially to suggest opioid (Oxy) involvement.
  Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. or the raccoon broke in later on and made the trees home.
• Coors Banquet — Product · Alcoholic beverage · 1 mention · first at 28:59
  Mentioned in the context of a video featuring a lumberjack crushing a beer can.
• Rochester garbage plate — Product · 3 mentions · first at 16:23
  Yeah. You take that tattoo and then you reshape it into it looks like a What's a Rochester garbage plate?
• glass eye — Product · 3 mentions · first at 24:49
  What do you mean? You get nothing. You get this glass eye suture.
• marbles — Product · 2 mentions · first at 11:33
  People try to [ __ ] with me everywhere I go. Okay. Yeah, he just has a bunch of marbles in his cup holder.
• cassette tape — Product · 2 mentions · first at 12:37
  So he put it on a cassette tape.
• Christmas tree — Product · 2 mentions · first at 17:39
  I don't know how the heck this just happened. There's a cat inside my Christmas tree. I swear if you knock down any of my glass ornaments, cat, get.
• Frankenstein shots — Product · 1 mention · first at 1:54
  It was horrible. I don't know why I ever wanted to go there. And I took too many Frankenstein shots. and I don't which I don't even know what those are anymore. I don't even know.
• heroin — Product · 1 mention · first at 10:32
• cocaine — Product · 1 mention · first at 13:32
  No, no, no. God, I don't know. You don't do anywhere near enough cocaine to do that.
• Scrapple — Product · 1 mention · first at 17:32
  When was the last time you had scrapple?
• glass ornaments — Product · 1 mention · first at 17:41
  Happened. There's a cat inside my Christmas tree. I swear if you knock down any of my glass ornaments, cat, get.
• lidocaine — Product · 1 mention · first at 21:30
  The inflammation, a retrobulber block and subconductal injection are placed with lidocaine and pivocaine.
• absolute alcohol — Product · 1 mention · first at 22:39
  Applicator soaked in absolute alcohol are then used.
• Korean spicy bowl — Product · 1 mention · first at 23:17
  Onion soup special or do you guys have like a go John like sort of Korean spicy bowl scenario?
• cheese curds — Product · 1 mention · first at 24:00
  This is like Wow. Oh, you got Oh, Sean the Redhead got a bunch of cheese curds from Culver's.
• raspberry filling — Product · 1 mention · first at 31:57
  That was Oh, yeah. I could have sucked raspberry filling out of a jelly donut with a straw watching that.
• jelly donut — Product · 1 mention · first at 31:58
  That was Oh, yeah. I could have sucked raspberry filling out of a jelly donut with a straw watching that.
• clam chowder — Product · 1 mention · first at 32:05
  Soup? I was funny. I was thinking clam chowder and for some reason oyster soup.
• cigarette — Product · 1 mention · first at 40:08
  Oh god, I want to get a cigarette so bad.
• robotic toucan — Product · 1 mention · first at 44:55
  I got this robotic toucan to squeeze my oranges.
• Red 40 — Product · 1 mention · first at 46:01
  Welcome home my child. Here you have unlimited red 40. Government funded lobotoies. The finest mulch you can eat.
• glycine — Product · 1 mention · first at 46:06
• Dial deodorant — Product · 1 mention · first at 48:40
  He smells like leather and calm and then he's going to get all jacked up on his dial deodorant. He's going to get his dial deodorant cooking by doing a bunch of pull-ups at the [ __ ] airport. I bet he burps a lot when he works out.
• red cabbage — Product · 1 mention · first at 53:23
  Let's see. This is my last red cabbage. He's a beauty. His brother had fifth place at the Malvin Autumn Show. You need something quite powerful to cut him off.
• purple cabbage — Product · 1 mention · first at 54:16
  I think it's a purple cabbage. The whole thing's cabbage ste.
• scales — Product · 1 mention · first at 54:38
• hard-boiled eggs — Product · 1 mention · first at 58:54
  I had a green drink. I had a green drink and I had eggs. I had hard-boiled eggs.
• mayonnaise — Product · 1 mention · first at 59:16
  But I don't I stopped doing mayonnaise.
• vinegar — Product · 1 mention · first at 59:19
• cigars — Product · 1 mention · first at 1:00:58
  Yes. When William Howard Taft slides down the chimney with a bunch of gifts and cigars for the boys.
• bupivacaine ("pivocaine") — Product · 1 mention
• canned rotten shark from Iceland ("cromic") — Product · 1 mention
• Coors Banquet — Product · 1 mention

Concepts & topics

• GARBAGE PLATE — Concept · Regional food reference · 3 mentions · first at 16:16
  Discussed as a Rochester specialty (large piled-on meal) during conversation about regional dishes and tattoos; used humorously.
• Rochester garbage plate — Concept · Local food item · 3 mentions · first at 16:23
  Discussed as a unique local dish from Rochester, consisting of various ingredients.
  Rochester garbage plate is like eggs, hash browns, hamburgers. Normally we'll have a hamburger and I believe normally cheese and I don't know if it's gravy.
• Autism test — Concept · Submitted video / provocative piece · 3 mentions · first at 46:56
  Title or subject of a staff-submitted video (McFaren) that was part of the contest. Treated as a content label rather than a clinical test in this context.
  We got Holden with Holiday Barf, Eric House of the Future, and McFaren with autism test.
• Frankenstein shot — Concept · Drink reference · 2 mentions · first at 1:53
  Mentioned as a type of alcoholic drink consumed during a birthday celebration.
  Belur says Frankenstein shot is Madori and hypnotic.
• Frankenstein shots — Concept · Drinking anecdote · 2 mentions · first at 1:53
  Term used to describe a green mixed shot drunk by a host on their 21st birthday; discussed in anecdotal context.
  It was horrible. I don't know why I ever wanted to go there. And I took too many Frankenstein shots. and I don't which I don't even know what those are anymore. I don't even know.
• Autism — Concept · Topic of discussion · 4 mentions · first at 45:19
  Mentioned in a humorous and exaggerated context about children and medication.
  I love taking pylenol. I want my kids to be autistic. I am Pylenol Maxine. When I am pregnant, I will force my fetus to play Paradox strategy game.
• Tor Johnson mask — Concept · Pop-culture reference · 1 mention · first at 41:22
  Mentioned as the popular Halloween mask derived from Tor Johnson's face — part of a larger identification of a clip.
  Come on, Benji. Let's go. No, that's Tor Johnson. Who's Tor Johnson? He's the wrestler that was in Plan N from outer space. They made him his face into one of the most popular Halloween masks of.
• raccoon — Concept · 9 mentions · first at 17:46
  It's definitely got to be a raccoon.
• brain aneurysm — Concept · 1 mention · first at 11:49
  There's a brain aneurysm in her future.
• documentary — Concept · 1 mention · first at 14:46
  That's docu that is true documentary.
• film making — Concept · 1 mention · first at 15:40
  Oh wow. Again, that is a good example of film making. It's called one of those moments that you couldn't even script if you wanted to. That is a cuz we were following the lady.
• pathologist — Concept · 1 mention · first at 22:27
  Sent to the pathologist for evaluation.
• existential wall — Concept · 1 mention · first at 30:10
  We all face our We all face an existential wall.
• Romani — Concept · 1 mention · first at 35:06
  But he must have met some wild Romani out there on his trips between London and Italy.
• Yankee fan — Concept · 1 mention · first at 35:15
  But he's a Yankee fan, so that's great.
• conversation pit — Concept · 1 mention · first at 40:46
  Yeah, but it's the future. It's a conversation pit.
• cosmonaut — Concept · 1 mention · first at 41:13
  It's so funny, Marcus. I thought it was John Glenn, too. I think it might be a cosmonaut.
• physical disabilities — Concept · 1 mention · first at 45:06
  Oh wow, Mongus. Is that true? They have serving bots in Japan that are piloted by people with physical disabilities.
• lesbians — Concept · 1 mention · first at 45:41
  Government cannot stop me. My kids will build highspeed rails and they will become lesbians. RK Jr. can't defeat me.
• Italian brain rot — Concept · 1 mention · first at 46:09
  Courtesy of our good friends at Donqua Ginwa. All the Italian brain rot you can watch.
• credit score — Concept · 1 mention · first at 46:17
  Labu blind boxes for all. Because when you're here, safe from the rapture with an 800 credit score. Any city is a walkable city if you walk.
• walkable city — Concept · 1 mention · first at 46:20
  You're here, safe from the rapture with an 800 credit score. Any city is a walkable city if you walk.
• chop and screw — Concept · 1 mention · first at 50:07
  You think it's cuz it makes me think of chop. Chop and screw.
• Megalodon — Concept · 1 mention · first at 55:55
• Independence Day — Concept · 1 mention · first at 1:00:46
  I actually I'm celebrating Independence Day now.
• Arbor Day — Concept · 1 mention · first at 1:00:50
• data — Concept · 1 mention
• Django ("Jango" jacket reference) — Concept · 1 mention
• endophthalmitis ("endoplamitis") — Concept · 1 mention
• evisceration (ocular evisceration) — Concept · 1 mention
• fetus — Concept · 1 mention
• geese / goose — Concept · 1 mention
• high-speed rail — Concept · 1 mention
• lobotomies ("lobotoies") — Concept · 1 mention
• retrobulbar block — Concept · 1 mention
• Staff Pick / Staff Picks / Staff Pix — Concept · 1 mention

Places & events

• Rochester — Place · Cultural reference / food origin · 3 mentions · first at 16:17
  Referenced as the origin of the 'garbage plate' food discussed in the episode; used in a humorous back-and-forth about regional food.
  So and it's for people from Rochester.
• Tallahassee — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 2:36
  Mentioned as the location near Georgia where the speaker's roommates went to buy alcohol.
  They wouldn't sell 40s in Florida, but Tallahassee was very close to Georgia, just 15 minutes away. So, my roommates at the time, while I was out at the bar having a good time, drove to Georgia and made the party actually.
• Florida State — Place · Setting · 2 mentions · first at 2:32
  Mentioned in the context of a personal story involving a birthday celebration.
  And then I got a lot of alcohol in me and then I told the story on the show the Florida State they had a tradition where they would you'd go jump in the fountain in the center…
• Georgia — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 2:36
  Mentioned as a nearby location where alcohol was purchased due to restrictions in Florida.
  They wouldn't sell 40s in Florida, but Tallahassee was very close to Georgia, just 15 minutes away. So, my roommates at the time, while I was out at the bar having a good time, drove to Georgia and made the party actually.
• Bet Awards — Event · Anecdotal setting · 1 mention · first at 12:43
  Mentioned as the event someone attended and returned from with celebrity encounters (Rick Ross anecdote).
  All right. Goes to the BET Awards, comes back with Rick Ross. Rick Ross and the whole Posi. WE ALL GOT CONTACT on the set that day. Go over to Carrie with my little taper going to play it. Bam. Bam.
• University of Iowa — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 21:16
  Mentioned in the context of a medical procedure demonstration video.
  This is Richard Allen at the University of Iowa. This video demonstrates an evisceration in a patient with endoplamitis.
• Culver's — Place · Referenced restaurant / regional food example · 1 mention · first at 24:02
  Mentioned when panelists discuss cheese curds and regional fast-food quality — used as a food/culture reference.
  This is like Wow. Oh, you got Oh, Sean the Redhead got a bunch of cheese curds from Culver's.
• Bangladesh — Place · Setting · 3 mentions · first at 42:53
  Mentioned in a hypothetical scenario about hiring someone remotely.
  What we could do is we could hire you a guy in like Bangladesh who could feed the remote. That's why I have to be there. I have to be there when he gets caught in the.
• Detroit — Place · Setting · 2 mentions · first at 13:22
  Mentioned in the context of a personal story involving a store visit.
  Yeah. Also jacket. I was just so afraid that it wasn't me and Eddie when we went into that store in Detroit.
• Michigan — Place · Setting · 2 mentions · first at 19:46
  Mentioned in the context of a discussion about regional preferences for Culver's.
  Does Michigan have better [ __ ] Culver guys?
• Italy — Place · Setting · 2 mentions · first at 35:09
  Mentioned in the context of a hypothetical scenario about hiring someone remotely.
  Or somebody in New York City or somebody here in Los Angeles. You can hire people from anywhere in the world.
• London — Place · Setting · 2 mentions · first at 35:09
  Mentioned in the context of a hypothetical scenario about hiring someone remotely.
  Or somebody in New York City or somebody here in Los Angeles. You can hire people from anywhere in the world.
• Leach — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 1:45
  Mentioned in the context of a personal story about a 21st birthday celebration.
  My 21st birthday was pretty similar to that. That it was weird. We went to this place called the library cuz it was the only bar in Leach that I wanted to go to that I hadn't talked my way into and lied my way into at that point. and.
• Wisconsin — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 24:07
  Mentioned in the context of a discussion about regional preferences for Culver's.
  I don't know because I was just in Wisco and I wasn't as impressed with the Culver I got and I thought it would be the peak.
• Queens — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 25:38
  Mentioned in the context of a personal anecdote about seeing old men with gaping holes in their heads.
  Never seen [ __ ] It's got to be hole in a head in Queens. I'm talking from Queens. I saw plenty of open gaping holes.
• Iceland — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 37:01
  Mentioned in the context of a discussion about a traditional Icelandic food item.
  Oh, opening it in the car and they're vomiting all over each other because Oh yeah, they are so savage these guys.
• Halloween — Event · Incidental mention · 1 mention · first at 41:33
  Referenced in passing during a conversation about masks and cultural references.
  Johnson. Who's Tor Johnson? He's the wrestler that was in Plan N from outer space. They made him his face into one of the most popular Halloween masks of all time. That's Tor Johnson.
• Gary, Indiana — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 43:30
  Mentioned in the context of a hypothetical scenario about hiring someone remotely.
  You could do that. Or you could hire someone in like Gary, Indiana.
• New York City, New York — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 43:34
  Mentioned in the context of a hypothetical scenario about hiring someone remotely.
  Or somebody in New York City or somebody here in Los Angeles. You can hire people from anywhere in the world.
• Los Angeles — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 43:36
  Mentioned in the context of a hypothetical scenario about hiring someone remotely.
  Or somebody in New York City or somebody here in Los Angeles. You can hire people from anywhere in the world.
• North Korea — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 43:49
  Mentioned in the context of a humorous and exaggerated scenario about hiring someone remotely.
  I was thinking about something like that. Something real North Korea. I got a lot of people there that North Korea.
• Japan — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 45:09
  Mentioned in the context of a discussion about serving bots piloted by people with disabilities.
  Yeah, I love that. Oh wow, Mongus. Is that true? They have serving bots in Japan that are piloted by people with physical disabilities.
• West Korea — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at 43:56
  Mentioned in a humorous and fictional context as part of a joke.
  Have you heard about that place, man? It is amazing. Wow. You get the casinos.
• Arbor Day — Event · Incidental mention · 1 mention · first at 1:00:50
  Mentioned humorously as part of a list of holidays being celebrated.
• Rochester, Minnesota — Place · 1 mention · first at 16:57
  Rochester, New York. Rochester, Minnesota.
• Rochester, New York — Place · 1 mention · first at 16:57
  Rochester, New York. Rochester, Minnesota.
• forest — Place · 1 mention · first at 18:58
  Being okay. The raccoon ended up running outside the door and went back into the forest. And, now that it's not right there in that moment, it does seem kind of funny. It's probably going to get funnier the further away from it I get.
• Northern Michigan — Place · 1 mention · first at 19:46
  Yes, it's very northern Michigan. Very normal according to Elgrash. Diddy's prison wife says, For a second, I thought she murdered it and strung it up. Yeah, I was scared of.
• Gary, Indiana — Place · 1 mention · first at 43:32
  You could do that. Or you could hire someone in like Gary, Indiana.
• West Korea — Place · 1 mention · first at 43:56
  I love West Korea. Henry's Bad Foot.
• Leach — Place · 1 mention
• Wisco — Place · 1 mention

Media & podcasts

• Tor Johnson — Character · Cultural reference / Halloween mask origin · 1 mention · first at 41:26
  Hosts identify a person in a clip as Tor Johnson (wrestler/actor) and mention a popular Halloween mask modeled on him — used as a pop-culture ID.
  Come on, Benji. Let's go. No, that's Tor Johnson. Who's Tor Johnson? He's the wrestler that was in Plan N from outer space. They made him his face into one of the most popular Halloween masks of all time. That's Tor Johnson.
• Plan N from outer space — Media · Film reference · 1 mention · first at 41:29
  Mentioned in the context of a discussion about a wrestler who appeared in the film.
  Johnson. Who's Tor Johnson? He's the wrestler that was in Plan N from outer space. They made him his face into one of the most popular Halloween masks of all time. That's Tor Johnson.

Sponsors

• sponsor mention: Patreon subscription / staff mandate access — Sponsor · 1 mention
• sponsor mention: Venmo payout ($99.99) — Sponsor · 1 mention

Full transcript with timestamps

0:24 How many did she have? Three. That's it. Oh, I love this girl. It's not fun, right? Just [clears throat] There's no place to escape to.

0:43 This is the last street on the left. That's when the cannibalism started. Happy 21st birthday, staff pick. God damn. Damn, you look great and all growing up there, Staff Pics.

1:11 You know, I got to tell you something, Staff Pix. When I first saw you were just a little, but now I see you've grown.

1:22 And I knew that there was only daddy that'll walk the line if you I knew that there was a woman seed in you.

1:29 Oh, I've been waiting to DRINK WITH YOU. I TELL YOU WHAT, DAR STAFF picks since you were zero.

1:39 My 21st birthday was pretty similar to that. That it was weird. We went to this place called the library cuz it was the only bar in Leach that I wanted to go to that I hadn't talked my way into and lied my way into at that point. Uh, and it was horrible. I don't know why I ever wanted to go there. And I took too many Frankenstein shots. Uh, and I don't which I don't even know what those are anymore. I don't even know.

2:00 What's a Frankenstein? I have no idea. But I was like, I'm guessing Jergermeister and Dr. Pepper.

2:05 Yeah. Yeah. As I What makes it green? Something's got to make it green. It was green. No, it was green. As was my vomit. Um, and I ended up vomiting in a It was a bar where there was so much vomit at all times in Levik uh that they just had a big plastic garbage can for people to vomit within the bar so you didn't have to go to the bathroom.

2:26 OH, THAT'S SO NICE. THAT'S AMAZING. YEAH. Know your customer. I grew up right in there. my 21st birthday, my roommates were very nice. You couldn't get 40s in Florida. They wouldn't sell 40s in Florida, but Tallahassee was very close to Georgia, just 15 minutes away. So, my my roommates at the time, while I was out at the bar having a good time, drove to Georgia and made the party actually happen at 2:00 a.m. when I got back. And they did the thing where they filled they took all the shelves out of the fridge and filled it with 40s,

2:54 like the Snoop Dog video. It was a lot of fun. That's really nice. It was very sweet of them. I remember we went to poor Paul's

3:00 and then I got a lot of alcohol in me and then I told the story on the show the Florida State they had a uh a tradition where they would you'd go jump in the fountain in the center of the like the quad area the general area and I don't really remember anything from the bar. I remember the bar and then all of a sudden I remember being in the back of a pickup. I was in the bed of a pickup. It was cold. And then I remember being in the water because apparently they had pulled me up off the back of the pickup and sort of dragged my unconscious body

3:38 from the pickup and only good what 250 at this point. Oh yeah. I was big 285. Wow.

3:44 Very big at the time. Yeah. 285. And they just kind of slid me into the water and it was like one of those where THEY WENT LIKE YEAH. [screaming] YEAH. YEAH. AND THEN THREW ME IN AND IT was just like and then my body just just kind of floated there for a second and everyone like got to get him out. I don't remember that but I do

4:04 cuz you were back at the house getting the part. I had a party. Yes, that's what it was. No, you came back and I had to constantly keep checking. We just put Henry in his bed.

4:12 I dragged him upstairs and put him in his bed while we had a party downstairs. Yes. And then I had to I just occasionally like I would have like a check like every like half hour I'd go upstairs and make sure you didn't choke on your own vomit.

4:23 Yeah. It was awesome. And I do remember coming to you at one point in my underwear at the party with the cat mandible that disappeared that night.

4:31 Yes. Yeah. Yeah. The cat kept disappearing. It would disappear for months and it come back with like half an ear and like a lot fatter. Like where the [ __ ] you come from?

4:38 Yeah. We had a cat named Box that was like that. Yeah. Yeah. He pissed all over my drums and we were known as the cat the band that smell like cat piss for years afterwards.

4:47 You got to keep that reputation especially and try to make it in love and especially if you're trying to win the staff mandate.

4:56 That's right. This week we have all of our staff bringing us their best videos. These are our employees of the month. Ian finally came in last last month and won September.

5:11 Actually, that was uh I forgot to update this before the show. October was uh the video that I upset a lot of people.

5:19 Yes. Yes. And was never paid for, but that's just pornography. So, there was no November.

5:26 Missed that one. Yeah, you're lucky. Yeah, you missed that. Okay, I missed that one.

5:29 Missed that one. It's fine. It's good. Belur says Frankenstein shot is Madori and hypnotic.

5:36 E, I don't know what hypnotic is. Hypnotic. Yeah. Yeah. Um, Lauren Turbo Dieser Diesel. They wouldn't let me into a club on my 21st birthday because I was wearing a sash and a top hat. Instead of taking them off, I got mad and sat in the parking lot while all my friends went in without me.

5:52 That's That's a 21st birthday. You sound like a difficult person. A difficult man says, "I misjimed my Patreon subscription and my monthly money flow and almost missed it. Took out a $600 limit credit card just to not miss the staff mandate. Canceling it tomorrow. Good work. IT'S FREE MONEY."

6:11 YEAH, JUST RUN IT UP. RUN IT UP. THAT'S FREE MONEY. YOU have Thursday. You could see the show for free.

6:19 Dude, you know what I'd say to you? No. No. No. No. No. You can see it edited on Thursday. [ __ ] that, dude. I'm going to tell you this right now. All right, as a professional comedian, you can It's going to take him a long time for them to get $600 back. So, you can actually probably just default on $600.

6:40 If you could wait seven years. Take that from Henry. Yeah. Who's a man who's the only millionaire I know with bad credit? Hey, I BEAT I BEAT IT. I BEAT IT. I WON. I won credit.

6:52 Let's start this mandate off. Where are we? Where are we beginning? Who's our first?

7:00 Okay. I like to [ __ ] You like to [ __ ] We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ] I like to [ __ ]

7:10 You like to [ __ ] We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ] You know, literally, try it again, but mean it.

7:17 [ __ ] Ah, you like to [ __ ] We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ] I like to [ __ ] You like to [ __ ] We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ] I like to [ __ ] You like to [ __ ]

7:36 We like to [ __ ] Give me the part. [ __ ] This is the best self tape I've ever seen. [gasps and laughter]

7:43 Can I try it? We got to do it now. In a row. We all have to do it. I like to [ __ ] You like

7:48 You like to [ __ ] We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ] All right. Here we go. I like to [ __ ] You like to [ __ ] We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ] I like the [ __ ] You like the [ __ ] We like the [ __ ] I mean, this is [ __ ] I like to [ __ ] You like to [ __ ] We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ]

8:17 Whoa. I didn't know we were going to act somewhere. I mean, that was my choice. I I I I made a personal choice that my uh [ __ ] happen.

8:24 YOU KNOW, MAN, I LIKE THE [ __ ] YOU KNOW YOU LIKE I KNOW YOU LIKE THE [ __ ] MAN.

8:30 I wanted to make mine Irish. Yeah, man. I'm ready to kill a prostitant. What is that? What is that?

8:40 PROANT. AANT. VIDEO ROB. Really good. I like to [ __ ] You like to [ __ ] We like to [ __ ]

8:57 This is [ __ ] Let's see the next one. Oo, April. I am in control of my life. Because I am capable of powerful positive change. [screaming] Oh my god,

9:26 that looks like my mother-in-law. I rise above all challenges. This is smooth to my [ __ ] soul with flowing ease. [screaming] and offering daily obstacles and moving beyond fears and doubts with success and motivation.

9:50 This is like school grasp. Love this. I love this. It's my favorite. In this moment and throughout my entire day, I am energized with strength and purpose. OH,

10:11 THAT IS MY OH MY GOD, THAT ADDED years to my life. Oh man, the rack focus out too. It was beautiful. It was gorgeous. So well done.

10:22 If anybody's ever done that and knows what that feels like to see in your rearview mirror. Oh my god,

10:32 it is pure heroin. Just have someone behind you freak out. [ __ ] you're watching them freak out and you're just going slower.

10:41 Yeah. And then you just make sure they can't do an illegal cut around you either.

10:45 You're going to kind of make sure be like, "Oh, I kind of sometimes will do a thing to where like maybe I'll let you go." Oh, no. [snorts]

10:51 I don't want you. Actually, no. I'm not going to let you go. Maybe. Oh, maybe I'll let you pass. Actually, nah, I'm not going to let you pass.

10:59 Sometimes I like to sing a little song like I'm driving the speed limit. I ain't going faster.

11:07 Otherwise, I'm [ __ ] gunning it. Yeah, you gun it. You You're so fast out there.

11:12 But if a guy tries to kill me, I get it back. I I get him back. Mhm. You get him back.

11:16 I get him back. What do you mean? Like you get him back. How? How? Yeah. If a guy tries to kill you.

11:22 When does a guy tries to kill you? When guys try to keep ball at his center console and he throws them at cars.

11:29 People try to [ __ ] with me everywhere I go. Okay. Yeah, he just has a bunch of marbles in his cup holder.

11:37 Got you, [ __ ] Got you, Aggie. Mo Ho Ho says, "I love to hear how she spins that whoever she vents to later." Yes.

11:43 Oh, yeah. It's fine. She's going to die soon. Yeah. Yeah. That that woman is Oh, man. There's a brain aneurysm in her future.

11:51 Heart disease amongst ladies is a silent killer. People don't talk about it. Yeah. Because the first thing it does is make your tits bigger and then it kills you. One of the worst things that can happen to a woman. Mhm. Mhm.

12:06 Next video. I just wanted to let it sit there. I wanted to stay along. We got time. I We have We got 45 more. Whole show.

12:13 We do. We have a whole whole show. I want to I want to please my fans and I want to please the critics that are my fans. Uh the critics hate my fans. I don't give a damn. Now, I'm not that computer savvy. So, if he had sent me some thing that I plug into my computer, I don't know if I would have ever heard it. All right. Hey, download this. I don't know how to do that. All right? You know, so uh he put it on a cassette tape.

12:40 Then Jamie, my man. All right. Goes to the BET Awards, comes back with Rick Ross. Rick Ross and the whole Posi. WE ALL GOT CONTACT on the set that day. Go over to Carrie with my little taper going to play it. Bam. Bam. Bam. Okay, that's in the movie. And Anthony Hamilton brought in a joint that was just fantastic. And I took it home and I played. I This is the bomb.

13:07 God damn. He's really turned out to be a worthless human being. Yeah. Pretty funny.

13:17 Yeah. Also jacket. I was just so afraid that it wasn't me and Eddie when we went into that store in Detroit.

13:24 Oh yeah. Go. Oh, God. I hope that we didn't do that. No, no, no. God, I don't know. You don't do anywhere near enough cocaine to do that.

13:33 God bless him. God bless that confident, confident man. Yeah. All right. This is one of the best heats I've seen in a [ __ ] second.

13:41 That was a fantastic heat. I mean, do we still have one more? No, just three in this one.

13:45 Just three. Three in heat one. Holy [ __ ] [ __ ] guys. I'm actually kind of mad that those are all in one.

13:50 Poll is open. Poll is open. We have Rob with I'm a [ __ ] We should do Oh, yeah. This is [ __ ] April with traffic affirmations and Adam with Quenton's affectation.

14:03 Yo, I got that cassette tape. The cassette tape. That was the bomb. That was the bomb. And you know when Rick Ross comes into the house,

14:14 this other guy brought A OH, NO. THERE AIN'T NOT A STONE [ __ ] IN THE HOUSE. DID THEY really give Samuel L that jacket that just says Jango across it? It's like a leather jacket with It was crazy.

14:28 Yeah. Wow. In one of the quickest turnaround. And I'm sorry, Rob. I'm sorry because that's hard.

14:33 Yeah, but Traffic Affirmations [ __ ] took that hardcore. I'm sorry. Sorry, Rob. That was a

14:38 Traffic Affirmations is as good as film gets. Yeah, that was Yeah, that was like art. It's as good as film gets.

14:45 It's going to be hard to beat that. That's docu that is true documentary. Yes. Yeah. any contact

14:50 gen that genuine. Oh. Oh god, it's so good to see. Oh, kill them. Kill these women. Oh man. All right. What's next? What's next? Kelsey. What darkness is Kelsey bringing us today?

15:18 [crying] Did I see that one more time? I thought for sure it was going to be her. That's great.

15:28 I think that's correct. That was a good misdirect. Oh wow. Again, that is a good example of film making. It's called one of those moments that you couldn't even script if you wanted to. That is a cuz we were following the lady.

15:47 Yeah. And if you saw the guy in the background, he actually stood up and went, "YEAH,

15:52 THE [ __ ] THE [ __ ] WHERE ARE YOUR HELMETS?" YEAH. Wear your helmet. Wear your helmets. That was It just proves Russ helmets are great.

15:59 I respected that man because he was wearing a helmet. No shirt. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's a real That's a I actually weirdly feel like that's technically extremely masculine.

16:06 Yeah. Because who cares about your ornamental nipples? Sure. Who cares about your back skin?

16:11 He definitely [ __ ] his tattoo up. There's no way no question about that. Oh yeah,

16:15 you get that refix. You turn it into like a garbage plate or something. Like a Rochester garbage garbage plate.

16:19 A garbage plate. Yeah. You take that tattoo and then you reshape it into it looks like a

16:23 What's a Rochester garbage plate? Yeah. I've never heard those. It's a food term.

16:27 I've never heard those three words put together in my life. Rochester garbage plate is like eggs, hash browns, hamburgers. Normally we'll have a hamburger and I believe normally cheese and I don't know if it's gravy.

16:39 It might be gravy. All right. Normally the main difference is a hamburger bit. Okay.

16:45 It's a ham they put a hamburger patty in it and just this big hash. It's a big pile of

16:51 of Rochester garbage plate. So and it's for people from Rochester. I'm guessing that's where it comes from.

16:56 Yes. Rochester, New York. Rochester, Minnesota. It was actually named after the first mayor of Rochester's mistress.

17:04 Um Barbage Plate Jenkins. I Yes. Good old lady. Yep. Yep. She had a [ __ ] [ __ ] like a compost heap. But I'll tell you what, she'll make she'll make you a pie. Lickickety split.

17:15 Oldest mistress in mayoral history. 94 years old. Viv Void says Henry's just saying [ __ ] Sure, but the stuff about the Rochester garbage plate before that was completely correct.

17:28 Yeah. Yeah. So, learn about it. Scrapple. Let's see. When was the last time you had scrapple?

17:36 I get ghetto all the time. I don't know how the heck this just happened. There's a cat inside my Christmas tree. I swear if you knock down any of my glass ornaments, cat,

17:45 get. It's Travis. It's definitely got to be a raccoon. Yeah. Go. No, it's not a cat. What is that? Is that a squirrel?

17:54 No. No. No. This is bad. This is bad. No. DON'T DO IT. DON'T DO IT. [screaming]

18:12 5 in the morning. [snorts] These are all the ornaments that made it. There's my beautiful tree. There's the raccoon.

18:30 All right. THIS IS DELIGHTFUL. THIS IS [ __ ] DELIGHTFUL. I mean, she brought the tree. She bought the tree, brought it in the house, decorated the entire thing.

18:38 Oh, poor baby. I guess what are you GOING TO DO? CALL ANIMAL CONTROL. YEAH, CALL ANIMAL CONTROL, LADY. You shouldn't be doing this. It's going to bite the [ __ ] out of you.

18:48 Open the door, first of all. Oh, my Thursday morning. Uh, ended up being okay. The raccoon ended up running outside the door and went back into the forest. And, um, now that it's not right there in that moment, it does seem kind of funny. It's probably going to get funnier the further away from it I get. But um hope you got a laugh.

19:08 The raccoon. There's the dog. That was genuinely delightful. It was. But I don't think uh I mean I What is she doing?

19:20 Decorate an entire Christmas tree and not see a raccoon inside of it. Percoet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like she must be on some [ __ ]

19:28 Like that's like Yeah. Definitely. A couple Bartles and James and an Oxy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. or the raccoon broke in later on and made the trees home.

19:36 Okay. But then again, there could also be percoet involved there because who leaves their house so unlocked and so accessible that a raccoon just walks in?

19:44 I leave my door open a lot. Yes, it's very northern northern Michigan. Very normal according to Elgrash. Diddy's prison wife says, "For a second, I thought she murdered it and strung it up." Yeah, I was scared of that.

19:56 It did look like it was in a jibbit. Sounds like Diddy's prison wife is dealing with some past trauma.

20:03 Sounds like it. Sounds like it. Yeah. And straight up, Diddy ain't hiding anymore. He's just got a husband.

20:10 Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, he's doing a full-on He's partying in jail. He's doing fantastic in

20:15 the last picture I saw of him in jail. There's like a giant bottle of baby oil in his cell.

20:19 Did you see the picture of him? It's like beautiful smile. Like it looks like he's posing. Like if camera catches him and him going and he's like holding the supp. Yeah, he's doing great. He's loving prison.

20:30 He really should have been in there for a while. 50 months. Yeah. Not enough. Nope.

20:35 Yeah. Really not enough. Nope. I don't believe in that. Usually that people should go to jail for longer than they should, but he should be in there for many years.

20:42 Many, many years. Yeah. I mean, he still he still could probably do something in there that keeps him in there. So, we'll see.

20:46 He could and he's probably going to do something horrible when he gets out. Most likely.

20:50 It's a gay warranty. It's a guarantee. See you next video. I will forewarn people. Put your dinners down.

20:59 Okay, good. Honestly, that's really nice Eric. Look at how we've grown. I usually just think it's hilarious that people are eating during this show, but this one this one.

21:09 Yeah. Yeah. Good. No, it's good to Who am I going to be mad at? It's Christmas time. It's kind

21:14 of [ __ ] Maline. This is Richard Allen at the University of Iowa. This video demonstrates an evisceration in a patient with endoplamitis. Due to significant inflammation in this case and tendency for bleeding due to the inflammation, a retrobulber block and subconductal injection are placed with lidocaine and pivocaine.

21:34 The WCOT scissors are used to perform a 360° perommy. What is it? There's also which in general can be ignored.

21:43 This isn't good. Get this off of here. A super sharp blade is then used to make an incision through the scara limbus.

21:52 Stop this. I'll give her the safe word is stop this. Now I'll give the money. If we just give her money. Oh, there we go. That's got to feel so good.

22:05 This can be performed with Castro Viejo scissors if preferred. Oh yeah, that is normally how I do it.

22:10 From the end off the midas. Normally mine are currently in the washing machine, but normally that's how I do mine.

22:17 Yeah, we shouldn't make this one into a realation. Is there an eye inside the eye?

22:22 Oh my god. What's weird is the farther it goes, the more I get used to it. Well, of course not. That's how all surgery videos go.

22:27 Sent to the pathologist for evaluation. Wow. I tell you what, this person's never going to wink again.

22:33 There can be a bit of bleeding from inside the scaral shell. Whoa. [groaning] Now it's actually kind of fascinating. applicator soaked in absolute alcohol are then used.

22:41 And now I've like come to the point where that's interesting shell. The shell is then irrigated.

22:47 Yeah, eyeballs are just little balls of jelly. No, I know. I ate one. Scara is then incized with

22:53 Nothing made me more demystified about eyeballs than eating them. Utility are used to enlarge the incision across the back of the shell.

23:00 What does that do? The optic nerve palpated and cut. He's getting the eye out of the eye.

23:04 The end of the optic nerve attached to the shell is Oh yeah. How's Social Fox Brewing going?

23:10 You guys join you guys have a French onion soup special or do you guys have like a like a go John like sort of Korean spicy bowl

23:20 scenario? You guys like a bogey spicy bowl or You can really just pop that thing.

23:27 That's cool. You can leave. Usually I prefer if we were going to get into a fight Eddie with those guys in the cruise. That's what I would have done. Yeah, this would have ended up this ended up put us.

23:35 No, I would have poked their eyeballs out. Oh, you would have went for their eyeballs.

23:38 Oh, yeah. That's always a good idea. Fedin says, "My wife has been absolutely crippled by videos with merely the sound of vomit, but she's been very engrossed in this video."

23:47 Yeah. No, no. This is I was This is now science. This isn't that bad to me as much as watching people puke.

23:53 This is now It's cuz it's At first it was jarring. This is like Wow. Oh, you got Oh, Sean the Redhead got a bunch of cheese curds from Culver's.

24:03 It's probably going to be easier to sleep now with this person. Which state has the best Culver?

24:09 Might be tricky to learn. Wisconsin. I mean, I don't know because I was just in Wisco and I wasn't as impressed with the Culver I got and I thought it would be the peak.

24:15 You could have just went to a shitty Culver. I've actually been to shitty Culver that were better burgers.

24:20 I went to one on rest stop and I had a better better one outside of Detroit. Does Michigan have better [ __ ] Culver guys?

24:27 Is that where we're at now? Gernie saying yes. I do feel Gernie. You just saying that to be contrarian?

24:32 It's not necessary. You already have two layers of scare. I think should get a band-aid.

24:38 Yeah. Now I just get a big poker in place. The fact that there will be a lot of inflammation after this surgery.

24:45 No. What does that then do? What do you get then? What do you mean? You get nothing. You get this glass eye suture.

24:53 Yeah, man. Nothing. Is that it? I thought he was fixing the eyeballs to not have cancer in your eye.

24:58 Yeah, man. Oh, to not have an eyeball anymore surgery. Yeah, dude. Oh, one week.

25:04 Yeah, an eyectomy. Wow. They just closed that thing shut, huh? Of course. What are they going to keep it open for?

25:12 How many times you see an old man with just a hole? I mean, they will be that. Yeah.

25:16 Is that what that is? They don't They just pull all that out. Yeah, you don't keep the stitch forever.

25:21 But I'm just I don't know. It's got to heal. Why don't they just get rid of the lids?

25:25 Just cut the lids off and just have a gaping hole. And you're asking why would someone not have a gaping hole in their head?

25:31 Most you you don't tell me, Lick. You've never seen [ __ ] It's got to be hole in a head

25:38 in Queens. I'm talking from Queens. I saw plenty of open gaping holes. I have seen many old men with gaping holes in their head. But I'm saying that's not a goal that you should not be That's not what the doctor should

25:49 That's more for like people who are shot in the face. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Or you just lose the eye.

25:55 Yeah. Or you lose a fight. Like you said, you go for the eyes. Mhm. Yeah. My father wears an eye patch.

26:01 I know. My father has one eye. Does he have a full gaping hole or does he have the lids?

26:05 No. No. He's got the Yes, he has the lids. He doesn't have a gaping hole. Is that

26:08 But I was asking. He just likes the eye patch. Now you know the eye patch rules on your dad. Actually, he looks badass.

26:14 Rooster cockb bird. He does. Psycho birdie says, "I got a glass eye throat on him. He wants it bonked off my forehead." That's really cool. It

26:22 was fun. Lucky girl. That's really awesome. That's a lucky girl. You have that story forever. That's You can't pay for that.

26:28 Nope. Nope. But guess who had to pay for something? The guy with the glass eye because cost money. It's out of network.

26:34 Do the um Does Do you think glass eyes are fragile? Do you think they're actually glass?

26:38 I think glass eyes are pretty um I think they're pretty strong. Yeah. They're like marbles.

26:42 Yeah. Yeah. You don't want Because you don't want a glass eye to like explode in your head.

26:45 Can you put a marble in your head? Yeah. You can put anything in your head as long [snorts] as it's smaller than your head.

26:51 Yeah, I can get That's a great point. Yeah. If you got an open hole and you don't need an open eye hole to do it, too. You can put up your nose.

26:56 Like I couldn't put a car in my head. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Couldn't download a car.

27:00 No, but I could put a baseball in my head. Yes, you could. Mhm. Where? Yeah. If you [ __ ] cut open the top of his head.

27:07 Yeah. If you just hollow out this area. Yeah. Shove a baseball. I guess heads are just eye holders. Aam Racers asks, "Marcus, how did your dad lose his eye?" It was in a bet.

27:18 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was a funny bet he made. He got into a bet with a crow and he lost.

27:23 Yeah. It was a winking punch and he was his riddles were incorrect. His riddles.

27:29 Yes. Yes. The riddling crow of Jon, Texas. Watch out. I'm sorry. I mean, he know he lost it from [ __ ]

27:36 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. From [ __ ] his mother. Yeah. That's how it would happen. But we're still hoping he'll find it one day.

27:43 One of these days, you know. I hear it's probably sitting next to my dad's feet.

27:50 Heaven. In heaven. Body heaven. They're all waiting. David. David. Oh, so much fun. All right. What's the next one?

28:03 Last one of the heat. Last one of this heat. Jesus Christ. Forgot that we didn't even vote on this section yet. James always has good ones. I'm glad old men are still dressing like there's something also about old guys seriously doing goofy [ __ ] is one of my favorite things. Cut. Oh no, he he's going to cut that other guy. No, I I think he's going to get the I think he's going to crush the can.

28:52 I think that's what they're trying to do here. They're aiming for the can with the tree.

28:55 Yeah, you got to crush You got to What can right there in the forefront? The the banquet beer.

29:01 Yeah, there's an old There's a Coors banquet. Oh, I didn't even see that beer. Just stare at the friendly. Yo, I just thought someone was get their leg cut off.

29:13 No, no, no. James does a good job. He doesn't always show horror. He never does, but it doesn't mean that this guy's leg isn't going to get cut off.

29:21 Well, that would just be extra. James is kind of the ed of staff picks. Yeah, he is. That's incredible.

29:33 That's amazing. Again, that's better than any like Olympic sport. Yeah, that belly bucking. Yeah. Two types of lockers there.

29:44 Yeah. With an A. Yeah. And that's a synonym. You know, a lot of people thought they a lot of people.

29:51 Yep. That is proper. Oh, yeah. That is proper. All right. The polls are in there. Um, you guys are all disgusting. Heat, too. We got Kelsey with distracted driving. Travis raccoon chandelier. Surprisingly cute.

30:04 Surprisingly good. Meline eyeball removal. We all learned a lot. Mhm. Yeah. We all face our We all face an existential wall.

30:12 Then there's James with the lumberjack beer crush. Truly gives us all hope. Mhm.

30:18 Henry, did your father ever lose a a any appendage or limb or body part or anything like that?

30:24 No. He had back in the day what he had soul. Yeah, that's different. He got rid of that.

30:29 Sold it to the NYPD. He had to. He had to see my dad had an oldfashioned like he had like some kind of oldtimey thing when he was born that I remember where it's like his intestine wasn't connected right so they just carved from opium as an infant and just like attached his like intestine with some kind of piece of plastic tube. So for a while, for his whole life, he had like now when they'll do like those types of surgeries, they do like a little hole and they kind of put My dad just had this sort of like smiley face style hook scar

31:00 on his belly for the rest of HIS WHOLE LIFE. GET IT OUT OF [screaming] THE BOY.

31:03 THAT'S ALL YOU'RE LIKE GOT TIE TIE ONE TUBE TO THE OTHER ONE. You know, it was just easier to do stuff.

31:09 And he lived until his 70s. He did. He was I mean and he not for lack of [ __ ] trying.

31:15 Wow. Yeah. Of course. Raccoon Chandelier really took it down. I think Raccoon Chandelier was a was a choice that people were ready to make, but I do think that unfortunately that's what it was. It was a Curtis Leewa thing with the eyeball and the beer crush.

31:29 Yeah. Yeah. I thought the eyeball had it. I thought the eyeball had it. I think that the I think a lot of people were appreciative that we can not only have we grown enough that we told you it was coming, which I don't know if we'll ever do again.

31:42 And then also that it's in the end it's good to know. I don't think that needed to be a warning though.

31:47 No, it does. It did. It didn't. You know, I wouldn't think so. I Well, at first they need to know.

31:53 I could have eaten oyster soup. Well, of course. That was Oh, yeah. I could have sucked raspberry filling out of a jelly donut with a straw watching that.

32:00 When's the last time you ordered oyster soup? I was funny. I was thinking clam chowder and for some reason oyster soup. That's your jam band.

32:12 You know what I mean? That's your [ __ ] right there, man. That's your [ __ ] That help my [ __ ] brain. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Instead of clam chowder, yes. Oyster soup.

32:22 Oyster soup. That's what I like. You ever had some muscle come? Let's go to the next one.

32:29 Yeah, that's what everyone says. Dildo Votssky says eyeball was a thousand% more watchable than reverse vomit. So funny.

32:37 It's like that's my favorite stuff. Reverse vomiting will always be my favorite. I'm gonna bring back reverse Joey on my next mandate. It's been a while.

32:44 He has to. It's been long enough. Oh, I'm sick. I'm sick that week. Oh, Eddie. You'll get used to it.

32:51 The last one was good. Last one was when he did it. Oh, yeah. It wasn't as bad. It was more funny.

32:56 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But I also thought it was not as funny because the other one was worse.

33:00 Yeah. Yeah. It's I'm going to find a worse one. Great. Let's do it. And here it is, folks. All right. Ian, here it comes. Really? Do you want to dance with me?

33:19 But besides that, welcome. You keep your knights to yourself. So, at the very end of it, so it's a dating profile thing. He shows his legs. At the very end, he just says he keeps his knights to himself.

33:31 He said, "Well, he implied that something weird happens to him at night, like he's a werewolf.

33:37 There are two like he's a [ __ ] That's a werewolf. There are two sides to him that you can have a good time with him, but at night he stays alone because something happened.

33:48 That guy's a literal werewolf. The last thing he said was welcome. Yeah. Well, like are is it you're welcome or you're welcome? Welcome. You say

33:59 to his page. He was saying welcome to his page. Oh yeah, that was that was an introduction.

34:04 Oh, welcome to his page. Welcome. How do you say welcome in Italian? Um, get your ass over. WHERE THE [ __ ] HAVE YOU BEEN?

34:17 I THINK THAT'S IT. YEAH, THAT'S YEAH. YOU GOT YOU GOT TO EAT A HOT DOG. HEY, you're not as fat, huh?

34:27 YOU'RE NOT AS FAT. YOU'RE NOT KISSING FOR ME. YOU'RE NOT KISSING ME. That's how you say it.

34:33 Yeah, that's how you talk to children. 100 miles to the [ __ ] east, we'd be racist.

34:41 Now, secret Antifa Krampa says, "I'm just learning to really absolutely hate men."

34:46 Holy Baja Blast says, "Were his legs photoshopped?" Yes, I'm pretty certain they were manipulated.

34:51 They were not. Those are his real legs. Big ass legs. That guy does not have any technical knowhow at all.

34:57 He can't photoshop that [ __ ] He that guy those legs are easier for that guy to attain than it would be for him to learn how to Photoshop

35:04 or talk to a woman properly. Yeah. But he must have met some wild Romani out there on his trips between London and Italy.

35:12 Yeah. Turned him into a werewolf, right? But he's a Yankee fan, so that's great.

35:17 Henry sad dancing to Crazy Town. He's just saying he won't show himself [ __ ] you num nuts. No, you know, I think that you heard it wrong. You numb nuts. [ __ ] you. [ __ ] your [ __ ] ass. Only I [ __ ] heard something wrong. I don't hear anything wrong. 110%.

35:36 Yeah. Retention rate top. Comprehension. [snorts] You [ __ ] Memory. Welcome. You [ __ ]

35:45 Henry, quick. What's the [ __ ] thing? I like [ __ ] You like [ __ ] We like [ __ ] This is [ __ ] See memory.

35:57 I wouldn't have been able to do question us. I'm an actor first. Actually, actually actually actually

36:07 actually. All right. Next. We You like to sh I like to [ __ ] You like to [ __ ] We like to

36:16 We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ] Yeah. I like to [ __ ] You like to [ __ ] We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ]

36:26 This is [ __ ] I like to [ __ ] You like to [ __ ] [screaming] OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. [screaming]

36:44 OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. Ge likes this one. What is this? This is just adults on the internet being just getting attention.

36:54 What are they? But they're opening cirming inside of the uh car. What is it? Cromic is the rotten shark from Iceland.

37:04 Oh, opening it in the car and they're vomiting all over each other because Oh yeah,

37:10 they are so savage these guys. Is that A COP OUTSIDE? I DON'T KNOW. But it's they are so hashtag

37:16 Oh god. Savage that this is the wildest out. Oh, it's interesting. Usually I love vomiting in all forms. I find vomit to be so incredibly uh satisfying. I hated that.

37:30 Yeah. So strong. I didn't like that. Yes. Boston Ian Holden continues to fail. What did Why? How did he fail? I don't know.

37:36 At vomiting. That's like my favorite thing. Vomiting is my favorite thing. I think Holden just Googles worst videos on internet and delivers whatever is first.

37:45 See, Holden has contempt for us guys. Yeah, he has contempt for the three of us.

37:52 And what he does is is that he thinks this is dumb [ __ ] they like, right? And it's just like No, though. No.

37:59 You know, we don't though. Like, as you can see, most of what we like is is much more like

38:05 complicated. Well, it's it's got layers. There's no layers to that. No, I like a I like layers.

38:12 Yeah. You know, look how simple and amazing. I like to [ __ ] You like to [ __ ] We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ]

38:26 I think it's more LIKE I LIKE TO [ __ ] YOU LIKE TO [ __ ] WE LIKE TO [ __ ] THIS IS [ __ ]

38:34 I THINK IT'S more like that. Sure. Sure. I like to [ __ ] Yeah, he does. You like to [ __ ] Mhm.

38:45 We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ] I think that was Oh, really? Hamnant. Very Christian Bailey.

38:57 Yeah. Yeah. You got to put your swans into it. Yeah. Rick, we can't ban Holden. This is a we everything it needs a villain.

39:04 Yeah. Every sequence needs a villain. He's this villain. Exactly. No, the whole show can't be great. Paige hating says, "Y'all are just hating the hate because that was amazing."

39:14 Interesting. I You know what? I would think that it would be, but it wasn't. I just don't like those guys.

39:20 Yeah, I didn't like those guys at all. I didn't like seeing them exist. Yeah, Brit Wavey's correct. Holden just wants to be loved, but he makes himself unlovable. Yes.

39:29 Yeah, that I will agree with. Do you think he wants to be loved? Oh, everyone does. Everyone yearns for connection.

39:35 He wants it worse than anything. But yeah, all he ex all he wants to be is understood and accepted.

39:40 Yeah. But he'll never be. Yeah. Understood and accepted. I thought he just was trying to be awful.

39:47 No. No. No. Well, then he should go to the brain doctor. You should be seated issues.

39:59 [ __ ] you, man. [ __ ] his [ __ ] ass. Just start smoking again. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we should all smart start.

40:08 Oh god, I want to get a cigarette so bad. No, I'm just trying to get hold of that.

40:11 Oh, I'm going to be right there. Oh, I was about to start next video. It's kind of [ __ ] amazing. Is that legit? I mean, it's just a turning table.

40:44 Yeah, but it's the future. It's a conversation pit. I do love a conversation pit.

40:52 It's a vacuum. That's [ __ ] amazing. Is that John Glenn? It's so funny, Marcus. I thought it was John Glenn, too. I think it might be a cosmonaut.

41:13 Yeah. Oh. Oh, it's walking the dog. That's amazing. Let's go, Benji. Come on, Benji. Let's go. No, that's Tor Johnson. Who's Tor Johnson? He's the wrestler that was in Plan N from outer space. They made him his face into one of the most popular Halloween masks of all time. That's Tor Johnson.

41:36 Oh, well. See, this is better than Alexa. I'd have this instead of Alexa. Oh, yeah. Cuz this can't actually do anything for you. Look.

41:53 [cough] It's like already broken. To it. Okay. She's doing a lot of Very impressive. That's all you got. Just a little bit.

42:12 I am coming out to pick up the mail. One of my daily chores. This is all I want. You

42:23 can't get a better mailbox. This is what I want, dude. This is exactly what I want. This is the future.

42:35 It's No, it's not. It's definitely the past and it's very obtainable. Yeah, this is hard to do. We would not be able to make this.

42:43 I'm not saying we should or could. You know what we could do for you, Henry? We could get someone to just build cuz this is just remote control.

42:52 Yeah. Yeah. What we could do is we could hire you a guy in like Bangladesh who could feed the remote.

43:03 That's why I have to be there. I have to be there when he gets caught in the gravel, when he gets stuck in a bush. That's like the job, right?

43:10 It's not AI. No. No. And it's not No, it's my intelligence. It's run by me. It's a guy. But no, there's a guy that is controlling it to give you the appearance that it's a robot.

43:19 And I'll even adopt him. You can. You can adopt him. Yeah. From Bangladesh. Yeah.

43:25 Oh, that's so nice of you. Oh, but I'll adopt him. You should. That's what they ask.

43:29 You got to stay there, though. You could do that. Or you could hire someone in like Gary, Indiana.

43:34 Or somebody in New York City or somebody here in Los Angeles. You can hire people from anywhere in the world.

43:41 Very expensive. London. I kind of liked what you said about Bangladesh. Okay, we'll stick with that.

43:47 I was thinking about something like that. Something real North Korea. I got a lot of people there that North Korea.

43:53 Oh, yeah. I'll bring them over. What? I get some from West Korea. Amazing. Green chili over there. Have you heard about that place, man? It is amazing. Wow. You get the casinos. I love West Korea. Henry's Bad Foot. This is what Epcot was supposed to be. Exactly. Hamburger helpless. Boston Dynamics wants this video buried, which is true. Yes. Yes. Jenny P. Yes. Wife is the true robot doing the chores cuz the wife has to chase after the [ __ ] robot

44:29 and to patiently sit there while the robot pours a drink. But it's probably the 10th time

44:36 trying to catch it with the glass. That's a good one, man. I loved I just missed the confidence of the old view of the future and that the future was just going to be about like the constant mining of making sure we've never we never have an inconvenience ever again and how funny that concept was.

44:55 I got this robotic toucan to squeeze my oranges. Yeah, I love that. Oh wow, Mongus. Is that true? They have serving bots in Japan that are piloted by people with physical disabilities. THAT'S AWESOME. NOW GIVE HIM A GUN.

45:12 YEAH. Get revenge. See anybody jumping? Shoot him in the head. I love taking pylenol. I want my kids to be autistic. I am Pylenol Maxine. When I am pregnant, I will force my fetus to play Paradox strategy game. All of my kids will be fulmer. The government cannot stop me. My kids will build highspeed rails and they will become lesbians. RK Jr. can't defeat me. The worms in his brain eat pil. I will sell their data to Palunteer and then I will get an abortion just for fun and comment under all his symptoms theory.

45:59 Welcome home my child. Here you have unlimited red 40. Government funded lobotoies. The finest mulch you can eat. Infinite glycine.

46:07 Courtesy of our good friends at Donqua Ginwa. All the Italian brain rot you can watch.

46:12 Labu blind boxes for all. Because when you're here, safe from the rapture with an 800 credit score. Any city is a walkable city if you walk.

46:25 Then it got real. Fantastic. The ending got pretty damn real. Oh man. Fantastic.

46:30 Phenomenal. Really good. Really phenomenal. just really really wonderful inventory. That is literally what our podcast is going to look like in 10 years.

46:37 Yeah. Well, if we keep following the future as they say we should do, I guess they say you got to look to the future. You can't let the kids take over. You got to make pay attention to what the kids like and that's what they like.

46:48 Kids are wrong. Heat three. Ian, do you want to dance? We got Holden with Holiday Barf, Eric House of the Future, and McFaren with autism test.

47:00 All right. You know, it I love the new internet. I I like I like some of what the kids are doing, right? I like what they're doing, but I do think on some things they're wrong. I do think that they're wrong.

47:09 Sure. I think that you listen to the new music, it sounds like the the worst stuff of the old music.

47:14 You can't be wrong, though, and it's all an opinion. I guess it's true. You're right. That is a correct thing to say about opinions.

47:23 Yeah. That you can have an opinion. Yeah. But I do think there are some things that are objectively incorrect,

47:28 such as, you know, like stuff like anything involving wiping out a group. Yeah.

47:35 Genocide. People get really upset. That's old [ __ ] I'm just saying that's that's as old as that's old. That's the oldest art form. Genocide,

47:42 right? Unless, of course, that group is super annoying. Then that's again that's a full again back to opinion.

47:50 You don't like the kids because they don't like genocide. No, no, I'm joking. No, I like the kid. No, no, that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that the kids just don't understand that Sabrina Carpenter is [ __ ] just goddamn uh what's her name from back in the day, man. They're all just sing the same songs.

48:07 Flight FM [ __ ] man. Uhhuh. Uhhuh. Flight FM [ __ ] man. All right, here we go. We took it out. McFaren took it with autism test. Of course,

48:17 McFaren read the room. Yeah. Great job, Mcen. Really good stuff. Did you see RFK Jr. doing those pull-ups. Can you imagine his disgusting [ __ ] ass doing 25 pull-ups and then getting on a plane next to you?

48:31 I just can't believe that like his hands weren't so greasy that he didn't slip off the bar.

48:35 He smells like leather and calm and then he's going to get all jacked up on his dial deodorant. He's going to get his dial deodorant cooking by doing a bunch of pull-ups at the [ __ ] airport. I bet he burps a lot when he works out.

48:47 Hey, you know what I you know when it comes TO I JUST GOT TO BREATHE. I got to breathe. He's one of the few guys in America that can burp out of his ass.

48:57 That's the only way to do it. So, I'll get it closer to the source. Did you see that thing where you saw where he read the text?

49:03 I wanted for you to drink for me. I am your river. You're going to drink for my

49:08 I am your river is one of the more horrible things I've ever heard someone say.

49:12 Chad is saying, "Uncle corner." Uncle Uncle's right. What's wrong with Uncle Corner?

49:18 There's nothing wrong with Uncle Corner. We're embracing it. Yeah. Eddie and I are not fighting it on side stories. I'm wearing I'm wearing a stone pony beanie.

49:25 You want me to say cap? You could be more uncle than that again. You want me out here going like, "Oh, that new Doichi shirt."

49:32 Yeah. You really want to hear me talk? Yeah. Oh, you got Oh, you like that? No, it's Doicat. Doichi's different.

49:42 You like that? Oh, I Oh, you I bet everybody likes geese. I do like geese. Geese is good.

49:48 They're fine. Goose is also awesome. Oh, goose is fine. You're chopped. Oh, I'm chopped. Chopped.

49:54 What's chopped mean? [ __ ] you. Chopped. Chopped. Not chopped. Chopped bad. It's not chopped. I thoughtopped.

50:00 Order a salad who don't like to chew. No, we're not chopped. Chopped sounds good.

50:03 Well, that's cuz you like food. You think it's cuz it it makes me think of chop. Chop and screw.

50:09 It's saying we're chopped and unc. We are, but we are not chopped. Okay. We are unc but not chopped.

50:15 Chopped means bad. Just bad. Well, chopped means you're like used up. That Oh, chopped. I'm chopped up.

50:21 You're not chopped. Okay. No, I'm dead. We are Unk. Yeah, I'm uh biz. I'm I'm the biz.

50:31 We're going to kill every meme we get, guys. That's right. We're going to kill every [ __ ] meme that comes across our [ __ ] desk. This

50:38 shit's fat city. We got more. Oh, yeah. We got one more heat. We got to roll. We got to roll. Wow.

50:44 We've had this one before. Oh, no. No, no, we haven't. We have not. We absolutely have not.

50:48 This is incredible. Really? I guess Julie just seen it. Yeah, I think Julie just sent this to me.

50:54 Wait a second. She That's just She I don't know if she even knows she's doing that.

50:59 No, she knew. She knew. Go back to a show. No, she knew. No, she's not. She's not doing anything sexual.

51:05 It's not to be sexual be a show. It's a great show without being sexual. Can I go back to that real quick?

51:11 Yeah. Henry wants to see a jump again. She's got a great high knee. No, she doesn't unfortunately. No, she's just talking to the other. He's just pointing at it. The guy is just [ __ ] pointing at it. She's That's

51:30 She's pointing at it. That's No, he is. The singer is Oh, she did it, too. She singer does not know that. I think it's the bass. He's just literally moving her beehive.

51:40 Here's another layer of that. I think that was an NXS tribute band. Really? Yeah. I think they were playing an NXS song and the dude looked just like Michael Hutchkins.

51:48 What they call it? In moderation. Let's listen to it again. Yeah. Does he? That's funny.

51:53 Listen. Is he hanging from the stage? Let's listen. She's the rest of Hey, just boy. Just going. YEAH. AH, NO. SHE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT SHE'S DOING.

52:13 SHE FANNED HER ASS. SHE KNOWS SHE'S DOING IT. I THINK SHE'S GOT A SPINE PROBLEM.

52:17 NO, it sounded Let's do it again. It sounded more like Stone Roses or like Happy Mondays. I That one was all over the place.

52:28 NO. NO, IT'S NOT. Next video. Next video. Part of that. She was talking to somebody else. Big fart. Look at it.

52:41 [screaming] WOW. AH, [ __ ] YEAH, EXACTLY. Awesome garbage. Awesome garbage. It's so careful about doing it absolutely incorrectly.

52:56 Yeah. I mean, honestly though, it makes the other older robot look better. It does.

53:00 It does. Yeah, that's literally what I was saying. I like the other one better.

53:04 The other robot could pour soda. It got the mail. Yeah. Well, I was being controlled by a crazy man.

53:10 Hey, what do you do? I break a couple eggs. Next video. Next video. Let's see. This is

53:23 This is my last red cabbage. He's a beauty. His brother had fifth place at the Malvin Autumn Show. You need something quite powerful to cut him off. So

53:36 this is your future Marcus in and we once twice. Three times a lady. That's it. He's off now.

53:47 Wow. Cabbage. I'll have to put him down. He's really heavy right now. He starts railing this thing.

54:01 The outer leaves off. Oh wow. That lovely pup. They're all edible. Literally, honestly, bad horror movie. Truly a very good fit.

54:10 I like this guy a lot. I like this hoodie a lot. Everything about this like the purple.

54:16 I think it's a purple cabbage. The whole thing's cabbage ste. Look at that for a beauty.

54:24 Yeah, it is. Yeah, it's a big Oh, yeah. That's a triple G. Woo! Right there. Mhm.

54:30 Bring him around. Sydney Sweeney right there. bowling with that [ __ ] bastard.

54:35 So I can cut him. Could kill a child with that. I just zeroed the scales back. These don't weigh very much.

54:46 Alison, this man could not possibly have scandals. He grows cabbage for me. I will.

54:50 Yeah, that is 10, 11, 12, 13. The head alone is just under 15 lb. WOW. THAT CABBAGE is all edible. I know what that's like. It's

55:04 That's me as a baby, by the way. It's not a waste. Yeah. Wow. That's the same. That's what came out of your mother's vagina. Yeah. I guess it didn't have to take one or two.

55:11 Came through the skylight. Yeah, they ripped her out. Half. Do I use a saw or A KNIFE?

55:17 A KNIFE. USE A KNIFE. GOT that fun broad church accent. Really go out. Nearly there.

55:28 So, he's going to eat it. You ready? He's showing it off. Three, two, one. A beautiful.

55:36 Look at that. Isn't that beautiful? It's gorgeous. Yeah. I just want to [ __ ] get right up in there.

55:42 Yeah. Yeah. He loves you, bro. Sniff it. I love that. What is great? Michelle's the coolest.

55:53 Oh, yeah. Yeah. Megalodon. I think it must be my favorite color. the farts that come out of the

56:00 That's why I'm wearing this. I love it. Yeah, you do. And I'd love you to have one of these.

56:06 Okay, so watch this space. It may happen. Okay. Cheers. Oh, he may sell that eventually.

56:15 Cheers. Oh, I'm surpris Oh, Norway Memoriam. Great. No. Yeah. Hey, it's really nice.

56:20 No, he eats cabbage. He's going to live forever. Yeah. Heaven's cage. Just cutting a dense vegetable on an unstable surface with a noticeable pulsey. Yes.

56:27 Yeah. That's his job. Okay, that's what he does. He shakes and grows cabbages. It's British. It's British time.

56:35 That's his name. Pauly cabbages. What else is he going to do? Okay. His job is he shakes cabbages.

56:41 You ever seen a British person? That's all they do. That's all British people do. Shake.

56:47 Yeah. That's why they're all ghosts. Heat four. What? We got Matty with the cheek work. PATRICK WITH HOT dog automation. Michelle with the cabbage enthusiast. And you know, I bet you he's a um

57:00 a very nice man to have an afternoon with. Oh, without a doubt. Oh god. Tea and [ __ ] Him telling you stories. Nodding off and he's like happy you're nodding off.

57:10 If he had an orgasm, he'd die. Yeah. I like to see him cut out an eyeball. Oh. Oh, this is wonderful. Got the color. This is one of my favorites. One, two, three. Three little cuts.

57:23 Just be careful. Just be careful. Yeah. The three little cuts there was a was ruby red. Ruby red. My favorite color.

57:30 Absolutely. I love the color pus. Puss and quaglet. I [snorts] love the quaglet. My shirt's made out of puss. All right. Michelle wins with the cabbage enthusiast. Of course. And now comes the most devious test of our audience I have ever seen. Honestly, who will be the holiday employee of the month? We have April.

57:49 Everyone needs an extra hundred. Traffic Affirmations is out of a CVE film. Yes,

57:54 we have Travis, which is raccoon chandelier. Mc Jesus. Oh, no. I'm making my own dinner.

58:02 Okay. McFaren. It's got autism test and Michelle Cabbage Enthusiast. She could use it too.

58:10 It's going to be a rough one. 999. Can't believe Travis's first time in the finals.

58:15 It really is. Yeah, cuz that's the thing. I didn't think him, you know, doing raccoon video after raccoon video was ever going to make it. But this shows you that really if you just keep doing the same thing over and over and over again, eventually you might get to the end.

58:30 He doesn't know other videos. He really doesn't. Yeah. No, it's it's all but it just he's good at the one thing and that's what's important.

58:37 Raccoons. Raccoons and social media. Yes. Raccoons. Mostly raccoons most of all.

58:44 Someone fart. No. Henry just had that weird disgusting verb. I think it made up its way over here and it's

58:50 I've only had eggs today. Oh god. That's what it was. I had a green drink. I had a green drink and I had eggs. I had hard-boiled eggs.

58:57 Mhm. I had a bowl of them. And what I do is I mash them up. I do. I cut them up into a sort of like a paste with butter in them just so I can get them inside me.

59:06 This show must end. You not do that cuz I get sick of eating entire eggs and I'll eat like five in a go.

59:13 This is deconstructed devil eggs. He cuts it. He boils it. But I don't I stopped doing mayonnaise. I stopped doing it.

59:19 What do you do without vinegar? I just put butter in it and I just mix it all in the bowl.

59:23 Butter is worse than mayonnaise. No, it's not. No, it's not. Butter is not worse than mayonnaise. I looked it up.

59:28 I would say mayonnaise is worse. Yes, mayonnaise is worse cuz oil. Yeah, oil's worse than butter.

59:35 What's Who who won? No surprise at all. Truly, I am going to now have April direct my film after choosing this video. Traffic Affirmations wins.

59:53 I am in control of my life. I feel like after I saw one battle after another. Yeah. Where I was so touched and felt seen

1:00:02 of powerful positive change. And then the cut over to the crossing guard is just so

1:00:14 it's everything about it. Wow. So good work, April. Way to go, April. You got that bonus. You guys um

1:00:21 that Vinmo and $99.99 coming your way. You guys are absolutely incredible. Good work, team. Our team of rivals once again.

1:00:30 Oh boy. And next week we're doing something for the holidays. Yeah. And then we're taking two weeks off. Oh yeah, cuz it's the holidays. Yes, cuz we're going to go I'm not saying what holidays they are,

1:00:41 but they are the holidays. The holidays. We're going to not be present for those.

1:00:46 I actually I'm celebrating Independence Day now. Hell yeah. Arbor Day. Yeah. Is a big one in our family.

1:00:53 Yes. When William Howard Taft slides down the chimney with a bunch of gifts and cigars for the boys.

1:01:02 I'm doing Martin Luther King Jr. early this year. Finally. [ __ ] yeah, man. That's so cool. Cuz it's usually on my like to [ __ ] You like to [ __ ] We like to [ __ ] This is [ __ ] I like the [ __ ] Yeah. And you like the [ __ ] We We like the [ __ ] This [sighs and gasps] This is shedding.

1:02:08 I like the [ __ ] You like the [ __ ] We like the [ __ ] This is [ __ ]

Questions about this episode

Who speaks in "STAFF PICKS is 21 /// Last Stream on The Left /// December 9th, 2025"?

Henry Zebrowski (Host), Marcus Parks (Host), Eddie Tunes (Host), Ian (staff member) (Guest), Holden (staff member) (Guest), Eric (staff member) (Guest).

What is "STAFF PICKS is 21 /// Last Stream on The Left /// December 9th, 2025" about?

The content captures a humorous and nostalgic conversation about the experiences and challenges of turning 21, with participants recounting their own memorable (and often chaotic) birthday celebrations. Key points include reflections on questionable bar choices, unique drink concoctions, and the camaraderie shared during the transition into adulthood.

What is mentioned in this Last Podcast On The Left episode?

189 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including Axel Henry, Staff Picks, David Oscar Marcus, Traffic Affirmations, Fast Eddie, April. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "STAFF PICKS is 21 /// Last Stream on The Left /// December 9th, 2025"?

The episode runs 1 h 3 min; the transcript is about 11,550 words in 391 timestamped sections.

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