Transcript

Ep 595 - The Man Who Saves The World? (feat. Gabe Polsky)

From Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast · Episode page · Watch on YouTube

· 1 h 6 min · 14,595 words · 305 timestamped sections

This is the full, timestamped transcript of "Ep 595 - The Man Who Saves The World? (feat. Gabe Polsky)", an episode of Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast published January 22, 2026 (1 h 6 min, about 14,595 words). It mentions 10 people, works and ideas, including The Man Who Saves the World, Gabe Powolski, Patrick McCollum, In Search of Greatness, Moraga, California.

What this episode is about

The discussion focuses on Gabe Polsky's documentary "The Man Who Saves the World," which explores a significant historical moment involving nuclear decisions. The host praises the film for its engaging storytelling and concise runtime, contrasting it with the trend of lengthy true crime documentaries that often feel excessive.

Key takeaways

  • Forget six-hour murder mysteries; shorter docs mean less time crying over the popcorn.
  • Patrick McCollum: the chosen one who humbly said 'no'—definitely a sign of divine intervention.
  • The carnival life: where every twist of fate rivals the best Hollywood script.
  • Documentaries can be epic, but unless it's an ancient prophecy, keep it under 90 minutes!
  • When Jane Goodall calls someone fascinating, you know they have stories that could rival myth.

Who speaks in this episode?

What is discussed, and when

  1. – 10:00: The Man Who Saves the World, Gabe Powolski, Patrick McCollum, Moraga, California
  2. – 20:00: Prize Picks
  3. – 30:00: In Search of Greatness
  4. – 50:00: Lionel Messi, Greg Maddox
  5. – 1:05:40: The Man Who Saves the World

Notable quotes from "Ep 595 - The Man Who Saves The World? (feat. Gabe Polsky)"

  • Honestly, I said, and I'm not just fluffing you. It was I thought it was one of the best things I'd watched in a really long time. So, The Man Who Saves the World. That's it. Not The Man Who Saves the World. No question mark.
    about The Man Who Saves the World · at
  • Lot of research I hired a private investigator you know to look into this guy you know he was saying he's best friends with Jane Goodall and I didn't really believe him there I forgot about that he was buddy with Jane.
    about Patrick McCollum · at
  • Sleep at his house twice. which was pretty wild. his house he's got he's got two places, one in Moraga, California, and one in New Mexico, and they're both kind of really wild.
    about Moraga, California · at
  • This episode is brought to you by Prize Picks. The big game is right around the corner. Once championship Sunday hits, there's only three more football games this season,.
    about Prize Picks · at
  • We're talking about hockey. Well, I've done I've actually done several that are somewhat hockey related, but I really love In Search of Greatness, which is about the greatest…
    about In Search of Greatness · at
  • Short, not very heavy and had a short reach, but developed a style like Lionel Messi.
    about Lionel Messi · at
  • Thinking, he's not even in my film, but like same thing. he was he sort of doesn't really look like a baseball player. he's a little bit schlubby. He's not that tall. He's not…
    about Greg Maddox · at

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

People

  • Gabe Powolski — Person · Main guest · 2 mentions · first at
    Documentary filmmaker interviewed about his film 'The Man Who Saves the World' and his earlier sports documentary work.
    All right. We're live. Gabe Powolski, man. Thanks for coming.
  • Patrick McCollum — Person · Primary subject of referenced documentary · 2 mentions · first at
    Central character in Powolski's documentary; described as a peacemaker tied to an Amazonian prophecy and with an unusually varied life story.
  • Lionel Messi — Person · Referenced athlete (example in sports doc argument) · 1 mention · first at
    Cited as a case study for compensating for physical disadvantages (height/growth issues) with creativity and skill, supporting the film's thesis about greatness.
  • John Wayne — Person · Referenced public figure (client claim) · 1 mention · first at
    Named as another celebrity McCollum allegedly designed jewelry for, reinforcing the 'Forest Gump/Zelig' quality of his life story.
    He's you know he was a carney he was a jeweler designer to I guess you know Ronald Reagan John Wayne and Russell Crowe he was you know at a carney. So he basically at 12 years old he like joined the carnival for like four years cuz his.
  • Greg Maddox — Person · Referenced athlete (analogy/example) · 1 mention · first at
    Mentioned as an additional example (not in Powolski's film) of greatness via intelligence/precision rather than stereotypical physical traits.

Products & tech

  • The Man Who Saves the World — Product · Main focus · 4 mentions · first at
    Primary documentary discussed in the podcast, focusing on a man believed to fulfill an indigenous prophecy to save the world.
  • In Search of Greatness — Product · Secondary focus · 1 mention · first at
    Another documentary by Gabe Powolski, discussed as a previous work focusing on the nature of greatness in sports.

Places & events

  • Moraga, California — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at
    One of the locations where the documentary subject has a house, mentioned in the context of filming.
  • New Mexico — Place · Setting · 1 mention · first at
    Another location where the documentary subject has a house, mentioned in the context of filming.
    Pretty wild. his house he's got he's got two places, one in Moraga, California, and one in New Mexico, and they're both kind of really wild.

Sponsors

  • Prize Picks — Product · Sponsor · 3 mentions · first at
    Sponsor of the podcast episode, mentioned during an ad read.

Full transcript with timestamps

Wow. Wow. Wow. Wes. All right. We're live. Gabe Powolski, man. Thanks for coming.

Yeah. Thanks for having me. Thank you for coming. I uh I wanted to bring you here. I I I saw your documentary a while back. I got a little little screener copy.

Honestly, I said, and I'm not just fluffing you. It was I thought it was one of the best things I'd watched in a really long time. So, The Man Who Saves the World. That's it. Not The Man Who Saves the World. No question mark. That's about a guy who

didn't drop the nuclear bomb or something. Yeah. Yeah. That That's another film.

Yeah. Yours is The Man Who Saves the World. Which, dude, it's I swear to God I like I uh Brandon, our our mutual friend from Raphael, sent it to me and I was like, "All right." You know, and I'm I'm like I'm pretty like precious with my time. So, someone's like, "Hey, do you want to watch this two-hour thing?" I'm usually like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll watch it." But I read the tagline. I'm like, "Dang, that sounds kind of cool, dude. One night I just I saw through it." So, congrats on that. It's awesome. Yeah, it's it's 85 minutes cuz I know that you know the two two hours scares people.

But uh dude, now I feel like now documentaries are 6 hours. Yeah, it's it's the murder mystery thing's long. It's

I know, but the murder mystery doc, I'm telling you, man. I'm not I don't want to start by on a negative note, but like dude, I I I would really like to move back from the six-hour twisty murder dock. It's like just I don't need to watch this for 6 hours. Just give me an hour and 20. Hit me with a twist at the end.

I agree. I'm the same way. It's like a full work day. Yeah. I'm signing up to watch this lady get murdered. It's like, dude, hit me with the facts.

I know. Give me the facts. They're stretching, you know? They're Yeah. Yeah. True. But no, I thought your I thought your documentary was honestly fantastic. And And just to like I don't know. I don't want to give the whole thing away, but just to recap, I I I try to explain it to people and I I like I always sound crazy. It's about a guy who by the guy alone could have been what what's his name?

Patrick McCollum. Patrick McCollum. it. I mean, obviously, you could have just done one on that guy alone. His life is crazy. He was a peacemaker, you know. Uh he he's just does everything, but he got convinced somehow that he was the center of some ancient indigenous prophecy that he was going to was it save the world or bring everyone back together and thus save the world by saving the Amazon.

That's right. I mean, the second part. Yeah. So ba basically these indigenous elders from the Amazon came to this guy at a at like a peace gathering in India and they said to him, you know, we think you're this guy in our prophecy that we've had for, you know, hundreds of years. So different different tribes of the Amazon, they all kind of got together and identified this guy and said, you know, we think you're this guy. And you know, initially he's just like, I don't know what you're talking about. I I I'm just kind of a regular guy. I don't think I'm the guy. And they basically for 8 years kept coming to him and and and saying, you know, when are you going to come and fulfill this prophecy of ours? You're going to come and unite the tribes of the Amazon and essentially save the Amazon and restore the earth. And after many years, he's just like, "All right, like I guess I'll like do what I can and go down there."

And first of all, how that's crazy he was able to fight that off. I would immediately be like, "Yes, I I getting hit with the chosen one is my personal fantasy." So that's crazy he got to live that out and it's nuts that he tr he he was like no no no no I'm not which obviously you're the chosen one if you're going to be like no I'm not the chosen one it's like you're definitely the chosen one

so he but dude but then you so I'm like okay that's first of all it's that's like kind of a wild concept then you get into that guy's life and it's like he it's that guy was I've never even like heard of or seen a guy like that

yeah I mean most talented guy I think I've ever seen yeah no that that's kind of what drew me in honestly the prophecy part of it was just to me just so bonkers that I'm just like this this is this guy's a [ __ ] artist this is crazy you know

um and I was you know incredibly skeptical of it and then ultimately I you know first of all I started doing a lot of research I hired a private investigator you know to look into this guy you know he was saying he's best friends with Jane Goodall and I I I didn't really believe him there

I forgot about that he was buddy buddy with Jane yeah and then and then I you know reached out to her personally and got an interview and she said this guy's the most fascinating guy she's ever met and you know one of and so obviously that vouched for him but really what what kind of drew me in was how weird and amazing this guy's life was he was like the most fascinating guy I've ever met he's you know he was a carney he was a jeweler designer to I guess you know Ronald Reagan John Wayne and Russell Crowe he was uh you know

at a carney. So he basically at at 12 years old he like joined the carnival for like four years cuz his his brother got cut in half.

Yes. Okay. Yes. And his parents Yeah. Dude, it's crazy. I don't want to laugh at his brother getting cut in half, but Yeah. His brother got [ __ ] cut in half.

Yeah. And so he his parents had to go basically take care of his brother. So he was left kind of on his own at 12 years old. And and so what he decided to do was join the carnival. And there he kind of met all these freaks and married a prostitute, which isn't in the film, but and and and then

he's like a mythical guy. I swear to God, it's mythical. It's like Forest Gump. It's like Zelig. It's like the guy has literally done everything, you know? He's

and so yeah, I I I just felt like him alone as a character study. I don't know if you you sort of like character study of movies or documentaries, you know, just a f just him alone I knew would be kind of fascinating. Then on top of that, you've got this whole prophecy. You've got,

you know, indigenous, you know, going into this sort of indigenous world that, you know, most people have no idea about, you know, and learning about, you know, their wisdom and connection and all that. And then having this guy kind of fulfill this prophecy. It It's just like

the strangest Yeah. story. You kind of followed him around more so kind of like fact check the guy, which I I I could pick up on towards the middle towards the end of the doc was pissing the guy off when you were facteing him and he was just like, "You don't believe me, dude? You don't believe me? I'm the chosen one to save the world."

Yeah. So, yeah. I don't want to give too much away, but it was Dude, the documentary was fantastic. What? So, so how does that work? You like when you want to do a documentary, you just I guess you just got a hot tip somehow and then you got to go like you just follow the guy around. Like what was it like? I mean I I guess you weren't with him all day every day. When I when I see a documentary, for some reason I imagine you're just like living, eating, and sleeping in the same quarters with the guy. I was going to say sleep with a guy. You're sleeping in the same quarters with a guy, but it's like you're just kind of popping in, recording, popping out, you know, going back and forth. What is that like after a certain time? Do you guys become like super close or is it just kind of like all biz?

Yeah. Well, everyone is different. I mean, this one I actually really did sleep at his house twice. Um, which was pretty wild. I mean, his house he's got he's got two places, one in Moraga, California, and one in New Mexico, and they're both kind of really wild.

Yeah. Um, but yeah, I mean, in in this instance, you know, it was kind of on and off and and you know, you you you just you know, I I was kind of documenting him and following him, but it was it was really kind of on and on and off, you know. So I would shoot with him for for a few days and then and then like you know maybe a couple months would pass. I would sort of shape the story a little bit more then know what you know something else is coming up then I would go and and shoot that you know until I kind of you know was trying to wrap it all up and say what where is this going when is this going to end you know

how long that was actually the most and you filmed for how long you said about 3 years you know on and off.

Dang. So, yeah, that's got to be nerve-wracking, especially if you're filming, filming, filming, and you're like, "All right, come on. Go meet these guys. Go do the stuff." How does you handle kind of like trying to keep them on a timeline with that?

Well, I would constantly ask like where is this happening? What what's happening next? Is the prophecy, you know, going to be fulfilled? Like, you know, because in our culture, you know, we're constantly, you know, we want results. You know, we want And plus, like I don't want to be shooting this for like 10 years. Like, I've got other things to do and whatever. So, yeah, I would be, you know, putting [snorts] a little bit of pressure on on him about where is this going? And that was kind of the most nerve-wracking part of this particular documentary that I made was just that that it was so unknown where this was going. And I I had no I don't know if you've ever been in a situation where you get involved in something, you have just no idea where it's going and you think you're crazy. Why am I doing this?

I couldn't even like a marriage or something. You were saying it's so hard to pick. Yeah exactly.

You have a little idea. No, a project like that would be it would drive me insane to not know.

I was literally on the verge of insanity. Like, yeah, especially cuz you know, you got I don't know if you you staked it yourself or you have financial backers, you're doing this and sounds awesome and you're like, [ __ ] dude. Come on. Well, this one I was kind of on my own because as you said earlier, you know, pitching this story to like Netflix and HBO and places like that. I mean, it's just so far out and so weird. They're not making this kind of stuff. You know,

I haven't seen anything Yeah. I haven't seen anything like that before. And so I even going to investors, you know, they're just look at me

like, "What the hell are you talking about? This is too weird. You're crazy." And so I I I was kind of on my own at a certain point when I decided to commit to this, you know, I realized that I was kind of going to be on my own here. So that that put a lot of even more pressure financial also like one of my biggest fears is like

wasting my time. You know, if you spent three years of life like what have you been doing? You know, you talk to your friends and family like what are you making now? What are you making? I'm just like, "Yeah, this guy, he's in the middle of a prophecy." They they think they're they're like, "Dude, dude, you're you're out of your mind. You got to go see somebody, you know." And so, uh,

it's been it's been hard to to kind of, but I I did see a vision, you know, about this film. No matter how crazy it was, I knew I that somehow I could weave all these really interesting things together into something really meaningful and funny and really bizarre. It's like a trip. This whole thing's like just going into like a psychedelic kind of weird

trip, but that also I think you know gives you a lot to think about afterwards.

Yeah. And especially Yeah. And again, it it kind of does too. But I'm I'm actually reading a book right now, speaking of the Amazon, about the first concisadors who like sailed or like went down, I guess, in a canoe or whatever, navigated the entire Amazon River. And the author went down there cuz he always likes to visit like the historical sites or whatever he's writing about. And uh he did say he said the Amazon in particular is like he's like it's literally like a magical world. And he's like, you know, there's obviously a lot of it's been like destroyed. Um but he was basically saying that if we if we do lose like the rainforest, we're kind of we're kind of [ __ ]

Yeah. Because it's like it like retains moisture and if you knock down the trees and plant different trees, they don't retain the same amount of moisture and it gets hotter and blah blah blah blah.

But so hopefully it's true. Hopefully he does the thing cuz it's like I don't know. Again, no spoilers, but I was like you watch it and you go maybe he did.

Maybe he did the thing. Yeah. Yeah. I mean you know that that was the whole thing. I mean, I would go to these to these gatherings, you know, where he was essentially uniting tribes of the Amazon, you know, and, you know, they would be these sort of smalish gatherings, you know, there'd be there'd be tribes from various parts of the Amazon and and and you know,

well, let's just say about 100 people, you know, and you know, I'd be looking at this and they'd be doing, you know, indigenous ceremonial things with feathers, with fire, and all kinds of things. and connecting with spirits and so on. But from an outsider perspective, you're just looking at this thinking, you know, what the hell am I looking at? You know, this is so weird. This is about saving the world. Is he uniting the tribes here? But then I started thinking to myself, how does any business deal or any even Jesus Christ for instance, when he was doing his sermons and starting out and talking to people, it probably didn't look like

anything. It's just him talking to people and doing about some weird stuff and you know no one

no one would have said this is the guy he's going to this is happening everything happens

even on a big things that end up having these ripple effects that huge they start off really small and they probably don't look like anything that special you know

well that was when you guys started your podcast you know it's just you guys in a room and then it becomes far from

glamorous yeah exactly yeah that was the the meetups in the hotels where it's just like a 20 person meet up in a hotel convention center. What? That was kind of crack. That was cracking me up. He was like, "Bro, wait. This is the big meeting. This is

I will say what I liked about him too is that like he would do those meetings there. You know, it doesn't look great. There's just a couple people strewn." And he would get out and be like, "That was awesome."

Yeah. Exactly. That was what we needed to do. That's exactly he's like this insane optimist. And every time I would talk to him, it would just be like literally he just did the biggest thing ever. And I'd be like, were we at the same place? Like, what what is going on here?

Yeah. No, I don't know if have you met people like that that are just like so positive and so, you know, almost in slightly delusional way, but it becomes kind of contagious and

weirdly self-fulfilling, you know. Yeah, it is. I Yeah, I I uh on my good days, I can kind of do that myself a little bit, but then, you know, I I slip all the time. I'll just go anywhere to do a show and be like, "This is it. I [ __ ] up. I'm done. This is I'm gonna freak out on stage. I'm gonna walk off.

Yeah. Happens to me like 40% of the time. I'll be in the middle of starting a set and I go,

"Well, I'm gonna have to leave and everyone's gonna be furious and I'm going to go home. I'm going to move back in with my parents." I'm on stage. This is the first like seven minutes and I'm like, "I'll just move it back in with my parents. It's no big deal." But, [snorts] uh, but yeah, I try to persevere. But there is something nice about that especially now where like I feel like um like intense pessimism and negativity is almost like in in a way where it's like it's almost cool to be like [ __ ] world's ending dude we're we're screwed everything's done. It's like I don't I don't like that stuff honestly.

Yeah. I don't even know what I mean. I mean it's such a fight to stay positive you know but it's so important.

Yeah man. You know I mean how do you It's everything dude. Once you start that negative talk to yourself, you're you're it's really bad, dude.

And and yes, that's it's literally like the worst thing you can do, but there's nobody in my opinion, there's like no emphasis put on the responsibility of not being a gigantic bummer.

Yeah, cuz if you ever have like a if you ever had like a you know, I remember having like regular jobs, 90% of the people I've worked with were like massive just chronic bummers. Every single person I've worked a regular job with shows up and they're like, "Shit sucks." Yeah.

No other way. This is what it is. Natural thing. Yeah. Just show up and be like, "Another day here. This [ __ ] [ __ ] ass place. I hate this place." Like, "Dude, I just I just got here. Can we just chill a little bit?" So,

yeah. I mean, I wonder what people would need though, cuz I don't know. [snorts] I feel like without religion, I don't know what else could possibly stoke somebody day in and day out like that.

You know what I mean? It's somehow a mindset. I mean, even like, you know, making documentaries, it seems like the greatest thing ever. Oh my god, you get to do tell that story and this one and that one,

but on a daily basis, the grind of it and the the pressures, you know, it's so easy to get into that

negative talk. Have you ever been even the best things? I mean, it they should teach it in schools, you know, about kind of the art of positivity and

because that's all related to this mental health. You know what I'm saying? You need that. The problem is it's being delivered by school teachers who can be a little negative and nasty.

You know what I mean? It's tough if you're if you're like a Yeah. 27 year old lady being paid 30 grand a year. It's tough to get the kids and be like, "Guys, life is awesome. Life is great. You guys just got to believe in yourselves. The teachers, that's, you know, that's one job I would never I would like to have, but it's uh I don't know if I could do it, man. Especially like it'd be one thing if you had like other sources of income, but if you're just living on that, like the teachers I've talked to,

apparently they just get crushed by the administration cuz they're like, "You have to do it this way. None of it makes sense, but this is that the way we're going to be funded." And every parent is like, "Dude, you suck.

My kids right, you suck." Blah, blah, blah. So, with coaching too, it's similar about the parents getting involved.

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were happier out in the house. They would show up and be like great. Yeah. zero points.

Mine didn't show up that much, but yeah. Oh, man. I'm sorry. No, no, no, no. But I'm saying I'm just saying, you know, I I didn't ne Sometimes it's a good thing, you know, if the your parents aren't there every single

I prefer them not to be there. Honestly, I didn't I didn't like if they came it was like sucks.

Yeah. Then like, you know, I I would ride the bench for most of There's nothing worse than your parents showing up and you're on the bench the whole game and you're like, I'm sorry I brought you guys here.

I know. I agree. Right. That happened in college a couple times, you know, when I played.

You played college ball? Yeah, I I played college hockey. What? At Yale? Yeah. Damn, dude. What the [ __ ]

What position? I was a forward. What? Yeah. What the hell? I didn't know you were a hockey player.

Yeah. You don't strike I mean, again, I'm not saying you're not like rough and tumble, but you don't strike me as a [ __ ] college hockey player.

How'd you keep all your teeth? Yeah, we we wore masks in college, you know. Yeah. Okay, fair enough. When you play it professionally, then the masks come off. But

why? I don't know. I don't know why they they kept that rule. Maybe they wanted people's faces to stay in town.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Until until you play pro. Well, it's time to take the mask off and show your show that beautiful hockey face.

Yeah. For for advertising. They need to see the faces. True. For the game. Yeah.

Yeah. Cuz if you're wearing a mask, it's not you can't relate to the players. Yeah, that's true. So, what was the hockey grind like growing up? Cuz you must have played

It was tough. Yeah, that's a sport you play like early in the morning. Yeah, it was it was uh you know like like anything just such a huge commitment but I to find ice time in the often times like when you're a little kid you have to wake up at 5 in the morning and before school and stuff like that I think a couple times a week.

Damn. But it was it was you know just like it was just a huge commitment your whole life. You know you want to be

a great player, you want to play Did you did you cop the scholarship to Yale? They don't, you know, they they give financial aid. So, if they look at your income and and decide what what they to do with you, you know, they're not allowed to just I don't know about now, but back then,

you know, that's how they did it, but I got I got offered a couple scholarships from like Notre Dame and other places. But

So, you're nasty. I was. You don't You don't toot your own horn. I get it. So, how many documentaries have you done? I've done I've directed four and then you know made five.

Okay. Yeah. What was what was your favorite one you think? You know, well that this one they've all been very different, but one that's kind of near and dear. We're talking about hockey. Well, I've done I've actually done several that are somewhat hockey related, but I really love In Search of Greatness, which is uh about the greatest athletes of all time and about the nature of greatness told from the perspective of the greatest athletes. And it's it's really about kind of creativity and about how, you know, most of the greatest athletes from Gretzky to Tom Brady to, you know, Messi, they're they're ex they're not what we think they are. They're they're actually on a spectrum of like athletic ability and speed and this. They're actually like worse than the average athlete.

Strength and speed. Gretzky, let's take for instance, you know. I didn't know that.

Yeah. I mean, he he was he was like an anomaly. Could barely bench press anything. He wasn't very necessarily fast. He wasn't didn't have the hardest shot. He was But he was just because of these weaknesses, he had to figure out, you know, another way to play the game. I mean, he just, you know, was the greatest ever by far, you know, because he had to come up with these comp, you know, compensation tactics. So, he he just he thought he thought faster. The same thing with Tom Brady. If you look at his combine score, what So, what I was trying to argue is that I think we

we see sport in a in the wrong way. we we're not looking at the right things, you know, and for me it's all all about like creativity and sort of

what we do with our weaknesses, you know, and and that we can actually reinvent our fields by thinking about sport or whatever it is in a completely different way. You look at artists, it's the same thing. You know, in order to reinvent something, you have to you know, it's not what you think. You know,

I know what you're saying. It's not all about like the 40 time. It's not all about

It's totally the opposite. It's about the mind and about creativity. That's pretty cool. Did you see the movie Inside Out 2? I don't know if you watched that with your kids.

I don't No, I don't think I Dude, Inside Out 2 about emotions. Yes, it's all about emotions and stuff, but there's a part in that where you know the it's all about the kid having the motions. Emotions get out of control and they got to find some like equilibrium and that's kind of like the whole movie basically.

But there's a part in the end of Inside Out 2 where the girl Josh, have you seen this movie? this girl's having a tough time. Her emotions are all out of whack. She's obvious she's hitting puberty, too. So, there's like new emotions and um there's a part where like it all f like the thing you're talking about finally clicks and it shows that like she she's all like gung-ho like I got to be the hardest and fastest and then like she just

gained some sort of peace in herself and there's a thing where she's like skating serenely through the ice playing hockey and I I started to cry. I was it was just such a beautiful I it stuck with me for three days just I was like

God man that was it because there was so much going on in her life and then she just was like quiet inside her head and she was able to just like part through like having fun rather than like nashing her teeth.

That's exactly what the point of this movie is. And in fact, my greatest memories of maybe in life are are like playing hockey in an outdoor rink, just skating on my own and

just like that, enjoying kind of the the feeling of it. And you know, it's magical and that's what

the essence of of life is and sport too is just this free this feeling of freedom and being able to experiment and and it's the same with, I'm sure, comedy, too. It's all about just that period of experimentation and and just

unstructuredness about it, you know, that creates Well, well, yeah, once you get in your head, it sucks. It becomes a nightmare if you get in your head like that

and it becomes ritual. I got to do this, I got to do that. You know, no, I was talking to um God, I'm blanking on the guy's name, Kirk Fox. It was a guy uh Kirk Fox is a comedian. and he's in LA and you know I was at the mothership and I was just like in one of my little funks where I'm like I had like started doing newer material. I had to work out the hour and I was just like you know possessed being like this has to be good and I I would just go on stage and I could I could feel crowds being like gh cuz I'd come out like hey guys and they'd be like you know this is that's not what this is about. You should be having fun and making us have fun.

And I got off and I was or I was about to go on maybe I was between shows and I was just like talking to him like I don't know. I'm just like [ __ ] up right now about all my stuff. And he was like he just like looked at me and he's like who cares? Like just go have fun. Stop being you know it was such a simple

such a dumb thing. But I like at the moment it hit me and I was like god damn it you're right. And I I went on after that and had a blast. And I was like yeah I was doing a disservice to everybody else by being so self-centered and being like [snorts] I have to be the best. This needs to be great. And it's it's it's like literally a scourge. Like it's

we all fall into that crazy trap, you know? But it kind of comes back to what we were talking about earlier about positivity and and just kind of having fun

with things, you know, and trying to find that somehow because you get pulled back

into that seriousness of the negativity and you know what I'm saying? And yeah,

you can't Oh, dude, it's it's literally the worst. You can't perform either as well, you know?

No, it's it affects all things. I'm I'm up the age now. I'm I'm turning 40 in like literally a week and I like like clockwork now like I was you know my whole life I've been so cockure in terms of erections

and man like I'm noticing now I'm like dude if I if I even think about anything else while I'm having sex

you know what I mean I agree like any if anything else enters my field of awareness if I start going like what's this like is it

it's gone I not even gone but it's just not you know it's not the it's not the dick it's gone. And it's like it's been fun for me now being like, "All right, how do I, you know, what do I got to let go of?" You know, and maybe it's just going to get worse and worse as I get older, but but that's uh I sort of that's an interesting one. I've never had that problem. And like I mean, that's like a very, you know, localized example. But, you know, we'll see. That'll be my next quest to see if I could somehow overcome that. But it's, you know,

plus like, you know, if you're with the same person, it you know, it's a little harder.

What are you talking about? What are you even talking about, dude? No, it's amazing.

But I'm just powered by the strength of our connection. I have no idea what you're talking No. Yeah. Obviously, it's like, you know,

you know, sometimes I find that like if you close your eyes and not not that you're still connected to your partner, but

turn on the lights and put on focus more No, no. It does internally and sort of how you're feeling and you you know,

less stimulus, you know. So, it it It that helps a little bit too, I think. So, I think so. I for me, I just eat [ __ ] and I recharge. But the uh

that that helps. That's the move. I go, "Babe, time out. I need a water break. I need a water break, babe."

But I I agree with you, man. I it's like, you know, that's if I if I could somehow, you know, if you think about distilling all of your life's efforts into like one thing, it for me it really is trying to figure out how to kind of spread the stoke as much as possible

and not even like um I feel like it gets a bad rap because there's that like vapid version of that where you're like in the mirror being like you're a champion or it's like not that at all. It's like, no, you're a worm

and you're pathetic on some level, but despite all that, you can still transcend that inside yourself and not be a total drag on your own life and, you know, everybody else's.

Yeah. Like when people say, you know, it's it's I hear this saying all the time. Well, you got to love yourself. You got to love I can't quite I do I I almost Yeah. It's just a weird thing, you know? So, it's I don't even think it's that. I I don't I don't think

you do have to you don't you shouldn't like hate yourself and beat yourself up. That's the thing. But

yeah, loving yourself. How do you do that? Oh, I love you so much. It's the weirdest thing. I've literally tried this. I I was

I can't I was on LSD one time and like towards the end of it, I got this wave where I was like, I got to show up for myself. I got to love myself. And I like looked in the mirror and the first thought in my brain was like, shut up. And I was like, all right, my bad. Tried to love you, but you pushed me away. But yeah, I I personally think Yeah, I think that's one of those things that like it sounds great and then you try it practically and you go, "Okay, show like this is impossible." [snorts]

I personally think you should not beat yourself up like you were saying and just rather than trying to play some weird mind game with yourself and like loving yourself, just go do something for somebody else. That's the easiest.

That's a great That's easy. I can I can pump someone else up. I can show someone I love them. But yeah, that whole thing like love yourself, I don't know where that comes from or like where that even originated cuz there was no way that's I think that must have come in like the 80s like that was nobody said that in like the 50s 60s7s maybe 70s and 60s but

but I do think that love itself is a key to it you know that feeling of like if you can get that right here to you know love other people and

you know to get that feeling [clears throat] for other people and for life and you know makes a big difference too. It's it's it's similar to positivity or whatever but that feeling of love is what I think we all crave.

Yeah. And not not to be cheesy or whatever but there's something to that too. For sure. That that was the uh

that's when you say helping other people. Yeah. It's that makes me feel that transforms you. You know, if you could get wake up and and sort of try and channel that feeling of love rather than hate or

you know. Yeah. Or I mean it's what all religions what all spiritual traditions you know are saying you know and all the great people from you know Gandhi Martin Luther King

it's the key it seems to to to have a you know have a good feeling. Like if I want to try to alter my own mood, it's it's such a labyrinth and mind game that it's like I'm just going to end up probably having a panic attack. If I like close my eyes and start going like,

"All right, dude. Let's make yourself feel as good as I'm going to end I literally did this the other night. I was like putting my kids to sleep and I lay on the floor while they're like getting ready to fall asleep." And I like

started having a panic attack and I was like, "All right, I got to get out of my head." But I can easily text my wife and like, "You look great today." And she's just like, "Oh my god, thank you so much." And then I'm like, "All right, I feel good now."

Yeah. But when you try to apply it yourself, it doesn't doesn't work. You can. Yeah.

So what I do is I do really nice things for a lot of people and then I keep score if they do nice things for me

and then I eventually explode on them and say, "You've done nothing for me. Told you you look nice 10 times this week."

But yeah, man. It's uh Yeah, keeping score is is can't keep score. Can't keep score. Just got to be

especially if you're married, you know. Geez. Can't keep score. You can tell them how hard you don't keep score. That's what I I go, "Look, the other day you left your stuff out. I didn't say anything, but I don't keep score like that." So, yeah. Exactly. Right. But that I mean, marriage is one of those things that like

Yeah, man. It's like uh if you really want cuz I feel like again I I I only know my own self, but I I do feel like let's say collectively it is like a um like a furnace cuz it's you and another person. You have different ways on like this should be done this way, this should be done that way. And in my experience, you either like let go of a lot of stuff or it just [ __ ] explodes. Like there's there's no other way. You have to and you know,

and also you got to really anticipate that people are going to change. You know that

that nobody stays the same. That's not the point of life is to stay the same. It's to people are growing. and they're doing different things and to anticipate that and then really I think make that

just commitment to to kind of go with it and weather and not not fight against it.

No, no. I'm telling you, I used to always always when I was younger, I hear people say like just that similar like kind of folksy happy wife, happy life stuff. And I'd always be like, "Never. I'll never give up." And then you you you hit the point you go, I [ __ ] give up, dude. I'm done. I'll do I'll just [ __ ] clean up my plate or whatever you're so freaked out about.

But yeah. Yeah. But it's good. You know what I mean? It's like it's it sounds not but it's like I don't know like you know for me this is like kind of different but like co for me like like this whole thing about like being kind to other people cuz I was like I'm a nice guy and then like I would notice like I didn't notice how much I did this before co but I would be in a grocery store and I would like I would just see a person and like my brain I would my brain was constructed to like keep myself somehow above anyone around me in any way I could think of. So, I would like see I would see like a tall, handsome, muscular man. I'd be like, "Fucking loser. Guy's probably a big dork. Thinks he's so [ __ ] cool. Guy's literally probably a dumbass." And then I would just see like a lady like look at that [ __ ] lady. And I would just do this in my head like I I'm the same. I not now, but

No, I used I would do this all the time where I walk around and go [ __ ] look at this guy. And then co heightened it cuz it was like people would have the mask. I I wasn't a fan of it. I was like I think it's weird we're all afraid of the air. So, I would go out. I wasn't being like super aggressive with it, but like if I was outside walking my dog, I'm not wearing a mask. Like, I'm I'm fine. I'm not worried. We're all far apart from each other. And I would get like dirty looks in my neighborhood cuz everyone was like completely K95D up.

And I had that like it like heightened that thing in my head. So, now it was like enemies to me. And I was like, [ __ ] look at this [ __ ] Now I was like really amped up. And I remember I think I was in like a Whole Foods or something and I like

I realized somehow that every time I'd walk past a person and be like look at this [ __ ] piece of [ __ ] It gave me a bad feeling.

Yeah. Exactly. And I just something like snapped in me to where I start every person I saw I'd be like like rooting for them on some level. It be like I wish them the best. And you know I still have that like look at this [ __ ] lady's weirdass [ __ ] past. I would be like but I wish her the best. And dude I get filled with like an incredible sense of peace. And ever since I've been the whole thing for me is like even if you see somebody who's like kind of unbearable like maybe doing something crazy or whatever.

Once you have kids, you're like, "Oh, that's somebody's kid." Yeah. So like if my kids were out in the world, god forbid someone walk past them or like, "Nice [ __ ] hat, dumbass." I'd be so upset. So I started being like, "Well, I'm going to treat everybody like they're someone else's kid." And you know, and it's like cuz you know I'm I would I would hope their parents would like want them to be treated nicely. And if their parents don't care if they're treated nicely or not, then they need even more kind of like love and caressing or, you know, loving caring, whatever it's called.

And having kids really helps with taking that kind of perspective, too. Especially like with your own parents, like once you have a kid,

thinking about your own parents, how they dealt with you, and having a little bit respect for that, you know, being a dad and having a dad, you know.

Oh, yeah. Yes. And and other people too like you're saying, but I don't know what that is. I I had that same thing about judging everybody. And it's it's a weird where does that come from? It's like you can't even if you're self-aware like why did I keep doing that? You know,

I have a theory. I have a theory and it's uh my theory is that so it goes I think it goes all the way back to like

it's just a thing in nature like if you're an organism you have to you have to size everything up.

Exactly. But if you're an organism, say, and you s like there's a bigger organism than you, you're you have a fear of annihilation instinctively. You're going, "This thing's bigger than me. Now I'm going to die." And I think humans have so many dimensions to judge where it's like money, looks, success, what it's like infinite. Like

comparing. So if you if you sense someone bigger than you, then it's like you have to somehow cut them down in your head cuz there's like a weird innate fear that pops up.

That's my theory. Yeah. Yeah. So, you just walk around the day all day. And then if there's someone that like

you can just completely slam dunk on, it's probably just a feeling of victory where you're like, "Look [snorts] at this [ __ ] piece of shit."

So, yeah. I don't know. That's my theory about that. But it doesn't help you. And the thing is is you think you get this buzz off it. But I really think it makes you feel worse.

Yeah, it does. It's kind of like when you're in grade school doing that, you know, and it starts there almost.

Oh, for sure. kids making fun of other kids and it's so you still feel like when you're an adult doing that, you feel like you're a kid essentially still.

But I Yeah, I mean Well, it's one I mean if you're with your bros, it's fun. It's fun to mess around with your bros like that. But yeah, if you're out like in public around someone who's essentially a stranger and you're like I I know a lot of people do this and start just absolutely ragging on people like, "Bro, you can't do that.

It's not nice." Yeah. But but that helped me with social comedy though. Don't you always have to be observing and like it's part of it is picking people apart or their idiosyncrasies and that's part of the

if I'm if I'm struggling on stage I'll sacrifice a crowd member just cuz I'm like I'm not doing well and I'll just absolutely sacrifice somebody and I know I'm like this is wrong but I need this laugh right now and I'm going to make fun of your hat and I'm going to make you feel terrible right now so that I can continue. Yeah.

And I know it's not right, but it's or you're doing it to yourself, too. Like about your own life and Yeah. how

Yeah. Oh, I do that. But if I if I uh That's an easy trick to get a crowd on your side. Just absolutely just crush somebody in the crowd. And then they're like, "All right, you any of you guys want this? You better start [ __ ] laughing at me.

I will [ __ ] you." No, that that's how my growing up my family dinners were like that though. Like we'd all I was one of six kids and we'd all sit around the table [snorts]

and uh it was just like it was a war zone. Like everyone would start making fun of each other. our like my dad would get involved and like he would just like it would be one victim. You'd be if it the light turned on you, everyone would start just saying whatever they could to just completely humiliate you. Yeah. And you had to like strike out against somebody else and it would turn the attention on them

and it was like it was not it was like every night at dinner. It's probably how your comedy started now.

It could be. I don't know. But it's definitely that's that could be at least where that very critical negative voice came from because you'd be eating and like you'd have five other people being like look look your fat legs and you'd be like [ __ ]

you know you'd have to fire back somehow. Yeah. So it's not the best but it is fun. I don't know. I I do think it's fun though like

[ __ ] with people if they're you know I don't know even when they get when they react negatively to it is so much more fun if you catch someone who takes himself so seriously.

I know. I know right. I I'm kind of like a blood hound for that. If I detect somebody's kind of like getting like pissed like that, I I can't help it. I'll I'll start like needling and messing around.

Yeah. Yeah. But when I was when we were kids, Yeah. my friends and I would just kill each other like [snorts]

Yeah. I assume it's like in every, you know, in every circle when you're a kid and we just kill each other.

Yeah. Over and over. It was it's it's part of the whole And then, but people would laugh, you You know, I mean, this is it's just it's funny, too.

That that's the difference if you got to be able to take it cuz that's my that's my mom's big critique of my my dad loves giving it out, but if you get him, he's just like

you guys are [ __ ] He doesn't he doesn't like he doesn't like it at all. Loves dishing it out. Can't take it. Which I think that's probably everybody, but

but nice, man. So, so the the sports doc, so you're talking Gretzky. Who else who's else is an example of that? There's Tom Brady, Gretzky. Uh, so Rocky Marciano, who was one of the greatest obviously boxers ever of his time, was like, you know, really short. He had no reach, but he developed this style,

you know, where he would just really like Tyson had this, too. He would get clo He basically was undefeated. He would get close and and basically like hit from up close. He would just keep, you know, get stay in your face. [snorts]

Yeah. Exactly. and he was undefeated, but his body was like, you know, was not meant for heavyweight boxing. You know what I'm saying? He was he was short, you know, not very heavy and had a short reach,

but developed a style like Lionel Messi. I mean, he he was also shorter than than most people. He had this uh he you know human growth issue where he like wouldn't grow when he was a kid and had to get testosterone but he was you know he he also developed this fleaike style of like

you know deing people and he was so good with the ball and smart you know what I'm saying so he had that deficiency but he overcompensated in other ways I mean you go through even Jerry Rice so he's one of the best receivers in history he said he wasn't very fast you know but he he basically memor memorized timing and routes so perfectly that it gave him that, you know, competitive advantage cuz he was in the right place at the right time. Knew exactly when,

you know, when the ball was coming. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Um, I'm just thinking of other

No, that's that's really nice, too, because especially like with little kids, I've noticed it's like maybe it's always been that way, but like I'm just noticing now because I have kids, but there's like a serious paranoia about any even signs of like is this kid showing any developmental dis, you know, delays, blah blah blah. And people really freak out about that. And it's nice to think like, yeah, rather than trying to like force my weaknesses to become something they'll never become, how can I kind of, you know, adapt and kind of, you know, play to my own strengths and weakness?

Like even like Greg Maddox, I was just thinking, I mean, he he's not even in my film, but like same thing. I mean, he was he sort of doesn't really look like a a baseball player. Like, he's a little bit schlubby. He's not that tall. He's not that strong, but his accuracy and his ability to understand batters and,

you know, was on a whole another level. Yeah. It's you look at every sport, every of the greatest athletes, it's something like that. You know, that's completely unexpected. You know, I call it like Psky's law cuz it's like everything you see

everything you see is like the opposite. Yeah. You know, that's pretty cool. And you coin that paradox. I did coin it.

Damn. I say to my family I don't like well now here on the podcast but what just that I don't like to to be like a douchebag you know

why I coining what no one else is going to do it for you you don't do psky's law people are going to take it and they'll call it maybe mccusker's law

everything you see is the opposite yeah [gasps] so what is what is the law again you're saying everything is opposite as what you

everything is the opposite of what you see you know what you think so if somebody's like happy all the time, you know, like smiling, you know, they might be, you know, the saddest people.

Gotcha. You've seen things like that or, you know, these sort of paradoxes of opposites.

Yeah. Like the surface the thing you present is Yeah. the reality probably compensating.

Yeah. Uh, hey guys, real quick. I have some shows this weekend coming up. I'll be doing live standup comedy. I'll be at the uh Belding Theater in Hartford, Connecticut, January 23rd. That'll be Friday. Saturday I'll be at the Egg the Heart Theater at The Egg in Albany, New York. Uh both the t both both those shows shows are almost sold out. So please come and if you want to come, there's you know a few tickets left. Also the I'll be in Las Vegas then Denver, Boise, Idaho, Salt Lake City, Cleveland. Just go to matt mcusker.com.

There's a bunch of other places for tickets. Thank you. I'll be in uh Helium Atlanta tonight, Thursday through Saturday. Please come if you can if I know the weather's going to be bad, but I'll still be there. So, please come. shardini.com. The link is below. Thank you very much.

Uh, I'll be at Dallas Hyenas the 23rd, which is Friday, or in Yellow Rose Cane on Saturday. Panties inyou mouth podcast. Come on, guys.

Fair. Do you ever see the guy on there's a guy on Instagram who does facial scanning where he'll be like he'll be like all right this guy has a this kind of face and you know he has all these funny names for like tree face block and it's like it's not like a derogatory thing he's like these are the facial structure terms but he'll like he says like no one's two eyes are the same and he'll be like so he'll cover up the left eye like the right eye is the eye of the father and that's your secret hidden self and like look how afraid he looks in this eye and they cover this eye and they'll be like this is the eye of the mother and this is like your you know outward personality but it looks like angry. It's really kind of fascinating.

And when you see it, it's like it's not complete [ __ ] cuz like everyone does have like slightly different looks in each eye. I've been in the mirror non-stop the last couple weeks just trying to like see which side

that is which eye is what and like what it says about me. It's kind of a terri that he like looks at people's faces and he breaks them down to a tea and some of the people are people he he like knows nothing about. And then the producer goes, "Oh, this guy like killed his entire family." He goes, "Oh yeah, I

told you he left kind of [ __ ] up." And they the craziest thing they said there's a term called um forget what it but it's like it's called whites on three terms three sides of the eye. So like people have a lot of white showing underneath their eyeball that he's like that's like a giant red flag

cuz he had he had done the guy uh [ __ ] I forget his name. The guy who killed his parents,

Nick Griner. He did a facial analysis of that guy and that dude's eyeballs are like like you see a lot of the whites under his eye. So I've been on the lookout for that lately. But there's it's like a Japanese saying for whites under three sides of the eye. And it's like kind of a like if you see that be careful.

Oh wow. That is cool. Sampu. Is that what it's called? Oh yeah. Sampu. Whites on three sides of the eyes.

Yeah. I feel like all the those serial killers they all have that look. I don't know if we're sort of if that's a stereo.

I don't know. But but they do have I don't know if it's like you know they took too much acid or whatever.

Could be. I And this the funny thing was so Totally. I heard about that whites on three side of the eye thing and I kept saying to myself like I I would uh hear of people being like, "Oh, I just did like a bunch of Iaska and a lot of them would get this wonky look in their eyes and it's it's literally it kind of looked like you could see a little bit underneath and I could never like pin down like what is that about that?" But it was like a I don't know.

Yeah, I've done I've done Have you done? Yeah. Do I have that? How do you No, you don't have that. You have You're free from what's it called again? Tanaka. Yeah.

Sanua. What What's your thoughts on Iaska? It's well I I [sighs] you know it's very mystical. It's opens kind of like a portal to different dimensions that you know uh it's just it's just it's very hard to describe but it's very mystical. It's it's it's beyond opening a portal to something that you can't experience without you know taking Iawaska. You know, imagine, you know, God or somebody saying, you know, let me just show you this new dimension or several of them of what what's possible in the mind

and you're just like, oh my god, this is insane, you know, to to have an experience like this. And, you know, part of it is, you know, and I I can't confirm this, but is is the healing healing of

of, you know, past traumas and you're throwing up, you're purging, you know, you you feel better afterwards. It's not that I I I didn't do it because necessarily I'm looking to get healed or anything. For me, it was more of a curiosity

and and and just sort of understanding a deeper understanding of who are we, what are we doing here, what what is all this, you know?

Yeah. And it's just if you're somebody who who is curious about reality and mysticism and sort of understanding deeper about reality and stuff like that. I think it's it's fascinating and enlightening in that way. You don't go I mean it it's definitely still confusing because it's like you're opening into this portal and you're just like what the hell is all this? this is

this is incredible and crazy and strange and you know what I'm saying but it's not it's not like oh here's the answer to life some people do say oh I was told this and

you know I met Jesus or I don't know what what they happens and then for me you know

I can't say that I have a lot more clarity about everything but it it gave me a richer feeling about life and what's beyond what we can Yeah.

You know, I don't know if you've ever I mean, you know, you get that with mushrooms or

That's what I was going to ask you. What how does it compare to like a super high dose of mushrooms?

I don't know if you ever done It's a different almost dimension, you know? It's like, you know, mushrooms you go into in one dimension, which is like I I No, no. It's also mystical. You're in a portal. You're you're seeing things that are

you could never imagine, [clears throat] you know. But IA is like even a little bit of a different Each plant has its own almost world or something.

Did you feel like out of body or was it you're just looking around at stuff [sighs]

kind of but you're just you're just in another world. You don't even feel a part of your body. You're just almost going into other dimensions with different,

you know, patterns. you you feel like almost and and again everyone has different experience but I felt like I was in in some kind of strange matrix

of of patterns that were you know and the patterns would sort of tell you stuff in a way or

how many times feelings you'd have these feeling you know yeah how many times did you do it

I've done it like seven times really yeah so yeah that that's been my thing with IAS I've never done it because I I talk to people and they're like I've done it like 55 time like literally like 55 five times. And I'm like, what? Why would you think somebody would do it that many times? Well, [sighs] why would somebody I mean, I don't know. There are people do it for different reasons. Some people they just like they like need to get healed or they're trying to get to something. They're trying to it's a medicine. I mean, some of these shamans or people in the Amazon, they're doing it thousands of times, you know? So, for them, that's not a big deal, you know? It's just part of daily life. They want to access the the spiritual realms. You know, they want to be

close to that because there's a lot happening right now that, you know, we're not perceiving, we're not seeing. You know, some people can can be in both worlds at the same time. They can be in this reality but also experiencing, you know, this this spiritual reality at the same time. The question you asked was why do they need to do it that much? I've also noticed that people can do it a thousand times and and they're still kind of the same, you know, which is I don't know. Are you trying to change so much or

I I see what you're saying. It's like looking at it from like a cure perspective where it's like you hear that

I've seen people get better mostly, you know, mostly you get better. That's cool.

Of a person. Mhm. That's nice. Yeah. I mean, so if you're somebody that is just like constantly depressed or has negativity just, you know, generally,

well, will better after the slap. I think he had done Iawaska like 30 times. Really?

I swear to God, he did he came out of the Iaska portal and just slapped Chris Rock right in the face.

I could be I don't want to be wrong about that, but I I read his book and he he was like that he was he claimed like that was something that came kind of for like the right time for him.

Um, but yeah, that makes sense. So, it's not like a cure all, but it definitely cuz I I I agree with that like with like, you know, just doing like mushroom. I've only ever done like mushrooms and acid and stuff.

Have you done it like in a party setting or more just like look, I'm going to go deep. I'm going to go on my own and

I I don't like the party set. Yeah, I don't like that. Although, I took acid at a concert and it was awesome. But that was sick. But the um but I prefer to like lay down somewhere quiet and do it. That's how I did the mushrooms and it was like it was awesome. Yeah,

it's great for for me it's like it's awesome. It really does like shave for me like in the the experience of it. You're like, "Oh, I've all I figured it all." But you're in it, you're like, "I figured it all out."

But in reality, for me, it does like shave edges off slow. So maybe to answer my own question, that's why I do it 55 times is it does feel like it like shaves off edges slowly, but you know, it's like a 2% once you

weeks later once like the afterglow, all that stuff wears off, you're like you're like, "Oh, I'm still the same." But it has like shaved off a lot. like the mushrooms.

It works your subconscious, you know, really. And it it helped the mushrooms helped for me realize how much I didn't realize how neurotic I was. I always knew I wasn't like, you know, uh, you know, like not neurotic. But when I took those mushrooms, it was like the five grams. I like laid in bed that whole thing and kind of blindfolded and all that. And I the day of I was like picking out clothes like, "All right, what am I I'm going to like wear something comfortable." And there was like I was looking in my closet and there was like stuff I had gotten a long time ago from Goodwill and I would look at shirts and like that could be on a that could be like a dead guy shirt and I was like I'm not wearing that today. Like I I didn't realize and then when I did it it was like it just really just kind of like I always tell people it feels like there was like your you know like your own frame of awareness is like a football

helmet you can't take off and it was just like take it off and I got to like look at it and I was like dude I'm [ __ ] nuts.

And then I was like oh [ __ ] And then uh but it was good. And then like or I'd like wake up in the middle of the night to pee and I I'll just get like rushed with the most insane thoughts of like I got to get it back to bed right now if I don't fall back asleep off it. And it's like it just kind of like deaded a lot of that stuff which was that was like nice.

Yeah. And it's hard to sometimes you'll you'll feel like you've got the key to life. It's right there. I I figured it out and then literally like two seconds later you forget

what just happened. You forget Yeah. every It's amazing. you you have the most incredible experience and you know a day later you just can't remember anything.

Yeah, that's kind of a weird thing but it does go in into your subconscious. That's true. And I I do think it'll be nice said this before but it'll be nice for uh

for people now who like have to confront death. You know what I mean? Like when you're getting older, it's like a smoke cigarettes, like watch TV, and that's like a really gritty way to die. You know what I mean? To try to like contextualize your death and like come to peace with it.

So yeah, I think that'll be a good thing for a lot of people. I think that like did you get this sense when you did psychedelics that like somehow you this is where you're going like after you die like into this kind of dimension or

no it kind of would prepare you for I didn't get that feeling honestly I I honestly I just more so get stuff of like

you know mine's more about like life about like this is just kind of what life is and you know blah blah blah but the uh but no I've heard people say that with DMT like And now I know like

it did feel like that with Iawaska that like somehow that I'd been to that place before this weird dimension that I've been there many many times you know.

Mhm. And so I do feel like I that might be where where you're headed you know. Yeah it's plausible. I mean again I no I I agree man that's the one thing of like just having some form of religious or spiritual sentiment like sentiment like whatever sentimental I don't even know the words uh sentiments is the word just having something to be like I'm not going to die and rot in the ground for nothing you know what I mean like it's my life is a meaning like that's it's so bad for you and I I remember reading uh

I think it was Carl Young was saying that like He had I think that's how AA kind of started where he he met whatever the guy's name was, Bill W. and told the guy the guy was like, "Dude, I've tried everything to get off alcohol. I don't know what to do." And he was like, "Yeah, dude, you're like 35. Like, if you don't somehow come to grips with like some concept of God, you're toast." He's like, "Every person I've ever worked with, that's kind of the X factor. If you're like 40 and you're like, I'm a staunch atheist." He's like, "Yeah, you're going to be depressed, though." So,

yeah, good luck. I kind of agree with that. Yeah. Yeah. Or Yeah. some some spirit, some creator, some something. I mean, you know, I mean, we're here for some reason. I mean,

yeah. You know, we're It's funny people like that's just a childish superstition. It's like I can face it by myself. It's like [ __ ] good luck, bro. I can't I can't handle that.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's cool, man. That's uh How long When did you start doing like when did that kind of come into the mix? Um, I think actually during this process of making this film, uh, that Yeah, exactly. But

I've always been super scared of it because when I was like 12 years old, I I smoked pot, you know, and uh, I totally freaked out and thought I was crazy and just like for a good six months like had a panic attack and was still like just in shock. It totally tuned me up and I was just like, "What the hell? You know, it was devastating. And so after that, for for like 20 years, I was afraid to do anything like, "Wow, if you know what I'm saying, like the

Oh, so you went from like no anything. Nothing. Nothing for like, you know, I mean, obviously, you know, alcohol and stuff like that, but because you know, I weed was so like insane for me of an experience and shocking." And

what was the bugout like at 12? Cuz I used to smoke weed when I was younger and I was chill later. No, it was I did do it one time and it was chill and then I did it again and I just completely lost it. Like

it was just like a a panic attack. I I I wasn't prepared for the for the psychedelic aspect of it. I mean it was just like really,

you know, I did a lot like a lot of kids, you know, and just everything was like this and I thought I was going to die. I thought I was going crazy literally for whatever and and it was so traumatizing that for

for months I was just like is this real? Is this what is going on, you know? Yeah.

And no one knew like what to do. They thought I was like Mhm. crazy. But yeah, but I but I just I did tell them.

Did you really? I was just like, you know, I need to go to the hospital. Like this is

dang, what they say? What's wrong with me? They they had no idea what to do. So, I mean, gradually the the it's dissipated,

but I still never felt like my old self. Mhm. You know, and it really kind of tuned me up and made me feel like very vulnerable.

Yeah. [ __ ] Sorry. Yeah. That's all right. Yeah. That uh Dang, that's crazy. And so, since that point, I was like terrified of losing my mind, you know? Mhm.

But ultimately I got gained enough courage you know in the last few years to like you know I was just so curious that I wanted to to to try it and I kind of started to

that must have been terrifying then like absolutely like and I think everybody's a little bit terrified of these you know these plan medicines or mushrooms because you know everyone's afraid of losing their mind you know.

Yeah. True. But I think part of it is is that's what we kind of need to do that this world

is it's rough. Yeah. [snorts] I've been I've been just for like you know you're doing a podcast you go I might I might I should know like what's the top 10 news stories right now

and I've been like groing being like yo what's hit me with the top 10 news stories. Yeah.

So scary. Everything you read is like really bad. It's like [ __ ] this is you know.

And it is it is funny. I mean, it's one of those things where it's like, we should just get along. But it's like there's got to be something we can do. This is this is kind of nuts. You read every story, it's just like the technology is too good. We can't keep fighting. The technology is too strong. Get into like boweapons, all this other [ __ ] and it's like, dude, we got to be nice. That's literally we're we're going to die.

We're all we're all going to die in like a hot nasty flash, and it's going to be pretty pretty sad. And going back to the movie, I mean, you know, I guess what I learned was that a lot of these indigenous prophecies kind of were all saying the same thing. So for the past like hundred thousands of years, they've been saying, you know, at this time the world would be going through incredibly difficult place, like cataclysmic kind of things. and that

it will be in such a bad place that you know we're going to really need indigenous wisdom. Go back to the original, they call it the original um order, you know, the go back to the origins, you know, of indigenous wisdom and connection to the earth that we're going to need to to basically save ourselves. Mhm.

Um yeah, you know, part of that is connection to, you know, the earth, listening to the earth, listening to all what's going on and then behaving in the in the in the right way.

I don't know. It's Yeah. I mean, it's fair, especially here, we're going to run out of water. It's like, [ __ ]

Yeah. 3/4 It's all water. Yeah. [ __ ] use it up. But yeah, that's uh Yeah. I mean, I I the thing that freaks me out is I think human beings need a cataclysm. if you're not going to like completely like rock your socks with psychedelics. It's like well reality is going to reach a fever pitch so hard that like it's either going to make a plague, you know, we co was like a minor that that was like a little bit but like I mean it's nothing like you know like the black death in Europe. That was like a real kind of rock your socks moment. CO was like scary but

you know it wasn't like you know a ton of kids dying. It was still like the elderly, which is like, you know,

sucks. But it's not like as gripping, I would say, as like every, you know, tenth kid [ __ ] dying, which is like maybe we'll never have that again because of medicine. But, but yeah, it's uh I I I do worry that humans need another big old cataclysm to kind of like be like, "All right, all right, all right." And that I think now, like, God knows what that could look like

if it's not a natural disaster. If it's like a man-made cataclysm, could be that could be rough.

Yeah. And it's for like for what? It's like, you know what I mean? Like what what are we what are we doing here?

Yeah. I mean, I don't know. Yeah. The the reality is definitely getting weirder and weirder, you know?

Mhm. Um right now. Yeah. The world and it's just and understanding reality, understanding, you know, what to believe, you know, that's kind of these are big themes in in my movie, too, is just what what stories do we choose to believe? What what do we believe in this kind of chaos, you know?

Yeah. You know, it's true. Yeah. I again, I just read the news now and I I just pray none of this is true. I hope it's all fake. I hope it's staged to scare me. That's like best case scenario. Then you look at it like, now these are probably a bunch of psychos fighting and you know, so

we shall see. But Gabe, thank you, brother. Thank you, dude. And uh dude, definitely go check out the movie. It's called The Man Who Saves the World. And it's Dude, I I I'm telling you, I liked it so much. I was soon as I watched it, I was I was talking to Brandon. I was like, "Dude, this is this [ __ ] was awesome. Where the [ __ ] where did you get where'd you get this?" So, what you did a theater run in it, right? You released it in theaters.

Yeah. So, we're still we're still in theaters. We're doing basically like a tour like a com you know, a comedy tour. We're basically,

you know, been all over the country and, you know, at the end of the month, we're we're doing four cities. You know, we're we're doing San Francisco on the 27th and then Oakland on the 28th and then Boulder on the 30th. This is January January.

Okay, nice. And then from there, what are the plans? Just keep Yeah. So, so we're we're kind of building, you know, this grassroots

um you know, brand, you know, audience swelling and and then ultimately, you know, it'll be more widely available. But

cool. Yeah. So, we're we're just we're out there getting the word out and and doing these theatrical events.

Nice. What do you What do you have? Uh you have anything down the pipe or We're going to be in Austin, by the way, February 26.

There you go. Nice, man. Do you have any other projects you want to work on or you

you know, I'm so focused on just taking care of this that that it's kind of my main focus right now is just making sure that this is released well and and then Yeah, I've got I've got a bunch of other things I'm I'm sort of thinking about.

Cool. Yeah. All right, man. We'll do dude. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you, dude. Of course.

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Questions about this episode

Who speaks in "Ep 595 - The Man Who Saves The World? (feat. Gabe Polsky)"?

Matt McCusker (Host), Gabe Polsky (Guest).

What is "Ep 595 - The Man Who Saves The World? (feat. Gabe Polsky)" about?

The discussion focuses on Gabe Polsky's documentary "The Man Who Saves the World," which explores a significant historical moment involving nuclear decisions. The host praises the film for its engaging storytelling and concise runtime, contrasting it with the trend of lengthy true crime documentaries that often feel excessive.

What is mentioned in this Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast episode?

10 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including The Man Who Saves the World, Gabe Powolski, Patrick McCollum, In Search of Greatness, Moraga, California, New Mexico. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "Ep 595 - The Man Who Saves The World? (feat. Gabe Polsky)"?

The episode runs 1 h 6 min; the transcript is about 14,595 words in 305 timestamped sections.

More from Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast

About this transcript: the episode's spoken words as captioned on YouTube, split into timestamped sections. Reclip.Me locates every person, work and idea in the text, keeps the time it is first named, and quotes the words around it verbatim. Last updated January 24, 2026.