Transcript

Christoph von Münchow | TABLE READ PODCAST

From Table Read · Episode page · Watch on YouTube

· 44 min · 7,523 words · 44 timestamped sections

This is the full, timestamped transcript of "Christoph von Münchow | TABLE READ PODCAST", an episode of Table Read published March 8, 2023 (44 min, about 7,523 words). It mentions 37 people, works and ideas, including Kristoff Von Munchau (Kristoff VMP; Kristoff Von linchao—variant pronunciations in transcript), Trolls, Waluigi, Erwin Schrödinger, Fox Tron Corporate Retreat 96 (Fox Tron Corporate Retreat 1996—variant in transcript).

What this episode is about

The content introduces Christoph von Münchow, a 24-year-old improv and sketch comedian from Jamaica, highlighting his diverse background and involvement in the New York comedy scene. The episode features readings of his original sketches, emphasizing a fun, light-hearted atmosphere among the hosts and guests as they engage with the material.

Key takeaways

  • Podcast banter: the only platform where nervous tangents turn into comedic gold.
  • At 24, Kristoff represents Gen Z humor, a curious cocktail of sketch, improv, and bilingual banter.
  • University societies: where UK's dignified campus branding meets America's casual 'club' vibe.
  • Nico's pop-up: comedy meets gourmet finger food, serving laughs while feeding the soul.
  • Rocks for sale: where a rolling stone gathers no moss, but maybe gathers a profit.

Who speaks in this episode?

What is discussed, and when

  1. – 5:00: Hard Drive, Jonathan Gaffney, Samantha Locks, Table Read Table Read
  2. – 10:00: Brooklyn Comedy Collective (BCC), Brunch Buddies, Fiction Bar and Cafe, Full Belly Comedy
  3. – 15:00: In the Heat of the Night
  4. – 20:00: Waluigi, Laundry Trolls, Troll 2, Trolls
  5. – 25:00: Trolls
  6. – 30:00: Trolls, Anna Kendrick, Erwin Schrödinger, Schrodinger sucks
  7. – 35:00: Erwin Schrödinger, Schrodinger sucks
  8. – 40:00: David Cross, Kids in the Hall, Trolls
  9. – 44:02: Angel Eyes, Brooklyn Comedy Collective (BCC), Brunch Buddies, Meredith Eckler

Notable quotes from "Christoph von Münchow | TABLE READ PODCAST"

  • Officially started yes hello guys hello hi this is table read it's a podcast where we read sketches and this isn't class we're not noting people we're not raking people with the.
    about Table Read Table Read · at
  • 96. that's right which we'll be playing on March 7th at 7 pm at Main stage at the Brooklyn comedy Collective tickets are available online at BBC's website and you should go…
    about Brooklyn Comedy Collective (BCC) · at
  • Established that you're super funny can we tell can you just get your name yeah I'm Nico Catanio I'm a stand-up I run a bi-monthly show at fiction bar and cafe called high…
    about Nico Catanio · at
  • One more thing to plug real quick oh unless the end I got a digital sketch group coming up called the brunch buddies we're gonna be dropping sketches in April we just finished…
    about Brunch Buddies · at
  • It's a blackout sketch I believed on my computer it saved as In the Heat of the Night In the Heat of the Night or it could be about a sneaky volcano eruption literally one of…
    about In the Heat of the Night · at
  • With you I said harder what the hell are you doing oh sorry I thought you said do your best Waluigi impression because it really delivers on what you're like you clearly it's Waluigi from the start yeah and so you're thinking.
    about Waluigi · at
  • No I'm not gonna do that or anything yeah no whatever this third sketch is I think it's called laundry trolls I'll be doing stage directions again here Sam you'll be playing both the roles of Ingrid and troll 2.
    about Trolls · at
  • All right what's up next all right our last sketch is a brief one it's two pages it's called Schrodinger sucks this is like this would be like a fun like one to put on youtube.com youtube.com All right so I'll be actually Sam.
    about Erwin Schrödinger · at

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

People

  • Kristoff Von Munchau (Kristoff VMP; Kristoff Von linchao—variant pronunciations in transcript) — Person · 18 mentions
  • Waluigi — Person · 4 mentions · first at
  • Erwin Schrödinger — Person · 3 mentions · first at
  • Nico Catanio — Person · 2 mentions · first at
  • Jonathan Gaffney — Person · 1 mention · first at
    We're not raking people with the calls we're just trying to have fun I'm Jonathan Gaffney and to my right I'm Samantha locks and these are our guests these are our guests hi thank you for having me no problem I'm so stoked to be here.
  • Samantha Locks — Person · 1 mention · first at
    Calls we're just trying to have fun I'm Jonathan Gaffney and to my right I'm Samantha locks and these are our guests these are our guests hi thank you for having me no problem I'm so stoked to be here oh my God I'm TR I'm trembling I can't.
  • Anna Kendrick — Person · 1 mention · first at
    Movies made by Dreamworks if I'm not you're kidding me right now the troll the trolls movies they made with Anna Kendrick and Justin Timberlake yeah where they sing yeah trolls…
  • David Cross — Person · 1 mention · first at
    Sketch I saw the television series Mr show yeah Bob and David Bob Odenkirk David Cross and for me like that just like felt like so much my thing and I really was like oh this…
  • Meredith Eckler — Person · 1 mention · first at
    We got one bad egg they're gonna be right there Craig we got Craig my buddy my friend co-wrote this with me Meredith Eckler she's super funny wow follow her I forgot the name…
  • Charles the Great (Charlemagne) — Person · 1 mention

Books & papers

  • Schrodinger sucks — Book · 2 mentions · first at
    All right what's up next all right our last sketch is a brief one it's two pages it's called Schrodinger sucks this is like this would be like a fun like one to put on youtube.com youtube.com All right so I'll be actually Sam.
  • In the Heat of the Night — Book · 1 mention · first at
  • Laundry Trolls — Book · 1 mention · first at
    No I'm not gonna do that or anything yeah no whatever this third sketch is I think it's called laundry trolls I'll be doing stage directions again here Sam you'll be playing both the roles of Ingrid and troll 2.

Companies & orgs

  • Fox Tron Corporate Retreat 96 (Fox Tron Corporate Retreat 1996—variant in transcript) — Company · 3 mentions
  • University of St Andrews — Company · 3 mentions
  • Table Read Table Read — Company · 2 mentions · first at
  • Brooklyn Comedy Collective (BCC) — Company · 2 mentions · first at
  • Brunch Buddies — Company · 2 mentions · first at
  • Craig — Company · 2 mentions
  • Mr. Show with Bob and David — Company · 2 mentions
  • Hard Drive — Company · 1 mention · first at
    Produce sketch shows whatever and you're also a contributing writer for hard drive and online satirical publication in this economy no it's all hard drive and I'm just a contributor in the way that like reductors cool yeah he has a.
  • In This Economy — Company · 1 mention · first at
    Hard drive and online satirical publication in this economy no it's all hard drive and I'm just a contributor in the way that like reductors cool yeah he has a sketch comedy show there's more coming up called fox tron Corporate Retreat.
  • Fiction Bar and Cafe — Company · 1 mention · first at
    We tell can you just get your name yeah I'm Nico Catanio I'm a stand-up I run a bi-monthly show at fiction bar and cafe called high hello comedy and I also run a pop-up…
  • High Hello Comedy — Company · 1 mention · first at
    I'm Nico Catanio I'm a stand-up I run a bi-monthly show at fiction bar and cafe called high hello comedy and I also run a pop-up restaurant called Full Belly comedy you run a…
  • Full Belly Comedy — Company · 1 mention · first at
    A bi-monthly show at fiction bar and cafe called high hello comedy and I also run a pop-up restaurant called Full Belly comedy you run a pop-up restaurant yeah like you cook…
  • Kids in the Hall — Company · 1 mention · first at
    Keenan can do better yeah I always love like telling people like oh do you guys watch Kids in the Hall you got to watch Kids in the Hall yeah and stuff like that right yeah cool so now I'm gonna ask the same question of you thank you.
  • Angel Eyes — Company · 1 mention · first at
    Retreat 1996. there are three super funny sketch teams some of the best in the scene we got Angel Eyes we got Craig we got one bad egg they're gonna be right there Craig we got…
  • One Bad Egg — Company · 1 mention · first at
    Funny sketch teams some of the best in the scene we got Angel Eyes we got Craig we got one bad egg they're gonna be right there Craig we got Craig my buddy my friend co-wrote…
  • Communist Society (University of St Andrews) — Company · 1 mention
  • DreamWorks Animation — Company · 1 mention

Products & tech

  • Trolls — Product · 13 mentions · first at
  • Troll 2 — Product · 1 mention · first at
    I'll be doing stage directions again here Sam you'll be playing both the roles of Ingrid and troll 2.
  • Trolls World Tour — Product · 1 mention · first at
    The trolls movies they made with Anna Kendrick and Justin Timberlake yeah where they sing yeah trolls World Tour that was one of those that's right and troll two yeah that's…
  • Go-Gurt — Product · 1 mention

Concepts & topics

Places & events

Full transcript with timestamps

um hello oh uh hi there oh hi wait sorry all right so the podcast is now officially started yes yes hello guys hello hello hi this is table read uh it's a podcast where we read sketches and uh this isn't class we're not noting people um uh we're not raking people with the calls we're just trying to have fun I'm Jonathan Gaffney and to my right I'm Samantha locks and these are our guests these are our guests hi um thank you for having me no problem I'm so stoked to be here oh my God I'm TR I'm trembling I can't I'm I'm so excited that's where we want you yeah good all right so much enthusiasm yeah I'm at like 11 right now you don't want to see him at 12. yeah you don't want to see me yet I get the 20 because it gets crazy and uh you just don't want to see that happen so let's keep it right here and if you just if you excite me even just a little bit more I'm probably gonna destroy this whole room so yeah yeah well we have

something very exciting we're going to read Kristoff's sketches today 57th prime minister of Japan when he died what sketch did he killed him what was the sketch that killed yeah okay so before we get started we just have to introduce uh the person who wrote these sketches um his name is Kristoff I don't know how to I don't know how to say your last name that's that's totally fair uh I do not envy you um it is uh it's as long and aggressive as it is German uh in German I would say uh Christoph on minchio bless you yeah we're going across the Atlantic uh but if in English just Kristoff Von linchao is fine all right and I just want to give a little bit of background for Kristoff because we have a nice little bio here uh Kristoff is a 24 year old man just for context he's a 24 year old man yeah we need to know this guy is this guy is not 25 he is not past 30. he is 24 years old he performs improv and

sketch comedy in the New York comedy scene he was born in Jamaica and raised in multiple countries that's the first time isn't that crazy like so I'm just he grew up in Jamaica yeah so you grew up in Jamaica raised in evil countries to a German father and an American mother Kristoff studied at the University of Saint Anderson Scotland where he was the president of the Communist Society for two years wow there was a stand-up Branch for the University of Saint Andrews Scotland that's right yeah it was a stand-up branch no idea yeah baby I do what's the difference between a branch and a club there's like a wing of the institution yeah also like in the UK um you know like at any college rates like oh the comedy clubs like clubs have a name but in the like the university system in the UK everything is just called the society so if you were like the bacon club sorry what a society like sorry everything in the UK is just

Society yeah the queen is the society oh the bus Big Ben the society uh Scotland questionably they don't want to be the society anymore they had a vote to not be the society uh this [ __ ] it's very historical again it's very historical of you but uh like if you were the bacon club you would be called like the baking Society yeah no keep going yeah so there's more I feel like you really haven't mined this one enough I'm back down at 8. oh Nico you're back from yeah I'm down I'm way yeah uh no wonky bits about uh uh geopolitics yeah uh we will we will get real low energy yeah yeah yeah but wait back to the bio hold on I'm on the edge of my seat yeah you regularly uh right act in and produce uh sketch shows uh whatever and uh you're also a contributing writer for hard drive and online satirical publication

in this economy no it's all hard drive and I'm just a contributor in the way that like reductors cool yeah he has a sketch comedy show there's more coming up called uh fox tron Corporate Retreat 96. that's right which we'll be playing on March 7th at 7 pm at Main stage at the Brooklyn comedy Collective tickets are available online at BBC's website and you should go check it out you can also follow him uh on his socials which are Kristoff H well Kristoff Kristoff VMP c-h-r-i-s-top yeah sorry oh no it's gonna be MVP yeah but it's very confusing sorry about Crystal VMP VMP yeah thank you so much thank you for having me thank you for having me listen here I'm here too yeah I don't have a written up bio for you even though uh let's be real we've already established that you're super funny can we tell can you just get your name yeah I'm Nico Catanio I'm a stand-up uh I run a bi-monthly show at fiction bar and

cafe called high hello comedy and I also run a pop-up restaurant called Full Belly comedy you run a pop-up restaurant yeah like you cook food no so I have friends that work in like they're like Sous chefs at fancy restaurants and so the idea of it is that uh every show one of them comes in and they cook like uh it's like a two or three dish menu kind of like a food truck sort of like uh like kind of like Gourmet finger food kind of Vibes and then basically there's a comedy show that happens at the same time as that so like that is very cool yeah and the whole thing is to raise money for food insecurity so it's a it's a pretty cool I'm basically awesome is what I'm saying oh wait hold on talking about myself has me at a 13 you can help people and obviously yeah it's crazy yeah it's really funny this whole time I've been harming people yeah that's the whole point of doing something was to like make yourself feel

good about hurt yeah yeah another game show schedule um yeah and then I also I run a company that sells rocks damn company is still dropped yeah yeah are they ethically sourced or wrong uh we find them on the ground oh okay that's pretty awesome that's pretty cool that's pretty I got one more thing to plug real quick oh unless the end uh I got a digital sketch group coming up called the brunch buddies we're gonna be dropping sketches in April we just finished shooting after four weeks brunch party brunch buddies yeah keep that on the socials as well sorry that's I that was a long bio for yeah we're doing a lot of people did like a nice graceful now I feel like a freaking that's all yeah but no tell us more about the comedy Branch the stand-up yeah I don't know why I talked to what I did in college that was like I don't know I just wanted to like put some credibility in there yeah which is

a good way to added credibility for sure yeah Lauren Michaels is my grandfather he's Grandpa yeah this character is a keeper all right let's get into it what's our first sketch all right guys uh so the first sketch we're gonna be reading is called Cheesecake Factory uh this is like a very game based if you know familiar with the Upright Citizens Brigade form of Comedy I wrote this for actually I wrote this back for my uh College sketch team and then I brought it to the class and it's been reworked for the years it's never been performed on stage wow so it's very it's old I'm always down like I know you guys aren't going to be critiquing that was what you said but like for sure if you want to rake me over the coals if you want to like tear up in front of me I I will not like yeah if you want to spit on the paper and then spit on me that's fine uh okay as for stage directions okay so I will be

doing the stage directions and playing the role of waiter uh Sam will be playing the role of Jessica John you will be reading for Laura Nico you'll be reading for the character of Maggie Samuel will also be reading for firemen and uh Nico will be reading for man all right okay oh I'm already in the food okay this is gonna be good interior Cheesecake Factory Knight a group of friends are seated at a table well here we are girls night this is crazy I can't believe none of us have ever been to the Cheesecake Factory right although FYI I've heard they have a pretty big menu here well whatever it is I'm sure the girls can handle it the waiter a skeletal man whose appearance lies beyond the limits of time drops three obscenely large Atlas size menus on the table making a loud thud good evening Welcome to The Cheesecake Factory the girls Paws uh good evening what are these your menus The Cheesecake Factory

Prides itself on its sizable offering are you serious Legend has it that Charles the great was able to feed his entire army during the Slavic war with the appetizers alone I'll be back with some water for the table I wish you good luck the waiter disappears Jesus this thing is massive oh my God there's a section in here that here that literally just just what whoa no way guys it's original screenplay for the Schindler's List it's it's in the menu uh guys why is my obituary in here the girls look at each other am I gonna die the waiter returns with the waters now are we finding our selection this evening hey uh what's with all this other stuff in here I'm pretty sure there's like five whole pages that are Gogurt mads from 1997.

what a vast offering requires a substantial upkeep a cost which can only be provided from the likes of our many sponsors this is the price one must pay at the Cheesecake Factory many businesses have come and gone lost to the sands of time their existence a mere footnote in our menu when the belt holes they told for thee the waiter stares directly at Maggie he turns back to address the group what have we decided on any appetizers I think we're all gonna split a few of the jalapeno pops nobody has ordered the jalapeno poppers in over 35 years all of a sudden the doors burst open as a crew of firemen enters the restaurant nearby a man is shouting the firemen are running in his Direction fire department First Response Team where's the emergency over here quick please hurry uh what's going on please the children you have to help us sir please remain calm and tell us what happened my students

oh man I'm killing it my students we were coming back from a middle school field trip and we decided to stop here for dinner five of them went flipping through the menu and and got lost in the dessert section please they've been here for two hours now you have to help them oh my God will that be all for this for the appetizers Jess I really think we should leave Maggie fiercely nods her head in agreement you I think we're just going very well you'll find the contact information for our cab services on page 72. great thanks for all your help the waiter turns to Maggie you'll also find the nearest hospital address on page 73.

the girls head up uh head out and get up and leave blackout that was good oh thank you I love that I love simple games like that I am so vexed anytime I go to into the Cheesecake Factory they have too much on the menu it makes me upset I don't know what to do I have decision paralysis anytime I try to order something they have ads they're just like in the menus it's insane it isn't it was relatable yeah yeah but if you ever get a chance the fried mac and cheese balls really that's a that's I never go there cholesterol well if anyone feels risky thinks they can swing it oh

ripped off the schedule yeah yeah that's what you're going to be dealing with from now on yeah that's real punk rock yeah comedy energy that is breaking your guitar after you yeah yeah my agent told me I'd be meeting with the mean producer yeah I don't recycle oh he's the meanest at least recyclable friendly producer anyone else got any uh thoughts on the uh Cheesecake Factory Sketch before we move on I always really liked the waiter I liked it yeah I liked also the turn halfway through yeah of like having it's like a very like I I love when sketches have kind of something just crazy that happens in the middle yeah and so I really like when the [ __ ] firefighters show up yeah a big sharp turn yeah it's like crazy but it's still on premise right yeah yeah it's still on the premise of the sketch and so that's fun that's good that's good writing what's your second sketch awesome so this one's gonna be a lot lot shorter

it's a blackout sketch I believed on my uh computer it saved as In the Heat of the Night In the Heat of the Night or it could be about a sneaky volcano eruption literally one of two women all right and then I'll I'll figure out by the end of the sketch hopefully which one of those all right uh so for this one uh Nico is going to be reading for person a I'll be yeah specifically named uh I'll be reading for person B and Sam will be reading stage directions fun interior bedroom night two folks are going at it and having sex in parentheses could be a guy and a girl what does that means read the actual stage Direction it's important that people know that here I understand why I can't be playing man in this one I also do love that stage

okay here we go um yeah harder harder harder give it to me wow person a stops okay what is wrong with you I said harder what the hell are you doing oh sorry I thought you said do your best Waluigi impression

because it really delivers on what you're like you clearly it's Waluigi from the start yeah yeah and so you're thinking what's while Luigi doing and then yeah he's yeah this guy's got a problem where he hears harder says do your best and that's the fun part about podcasts right you write them the whole point is just you just have four lines and then you just want your last line to be the funniest and the funniest yeah that's it yeah absolutely and I think for context this is one that like I had this also never saw the light of uh day in terms of like what yeah that's so hard for me to believe well I mean I see that too yeah well like it could work as a voiceover was like the best way to pitch is like while you're moving because the way our show's back at school were is like you had like a lot of video recording stuff while like moving the scene around like yeah you can play music in between sketches but

if you have like an audio piece even better just put two people home behind the back yeah blanket don't even need to record it you're right you just do it from the wings of the show yeah they even think about it do a silhouette damn Rocky horse style oh that's good yeah you could like get the Silhouettes out yeah yeah that's like a really cool use of the space and like that's that's actually Sam will never forget that uh just uh just pay me when you get famous yeah how much yeah how much yeah what's the I feel like sorry I feel like I just I I don't want your guys relationship to get like messed up later by like not having ironed it out so like I feel like you guys maybe need like some kind of like a contract or something right now I'll cut you a break I'll take a hundred grand wow that's all for the Waluigi sketch 100 000 sketch right here that kind of money I could buy while no you couldn't yeah all right he's

worth like the rights to Waluigi he's a real guy Luigi's a real guy yeah you're making that up dude you're making that up right now I don't believe you for a second I had and I had sex with them I had sex with him wait is this okay you think I'm coming into here putting my imagination to work no I'm I'm writing real wait but was it was he was the real life thing backwards from this so he was he didn't go harder when you said do your best Waluigi impression yeah so I actually this is where I get a little bit um because I was Waluigi in this I wanted to save face as the writer and come across as the better person but it turns out uh Waluigi had all was the passionate lover the better lover yeah did he wear the hat of course he wore the hat like during sex yeah what do you think it's Waluigi the Hat stays on did he did he wear the overalls you know he wore the peanuts were awesome so it was like you could see I

could see his as wonderful Waluigi nipples yeah yeah and how much hair does he have ugh buddy you don't want to know all right what's this what's his third Sketcher oh it wasn't about a volcano no I'm not gonna do that or anything yeah no whatever uh this third sketch uh is I think it's called laundry trolls I'll be doing stage directions again here Sam you'll be playing both the roles of Ingrid and troll 2. John you'll be playing the role of Justin Nico will be playing the role of troll one I will be rolling up rolling I'll be playing the role of troll 3 and then there's a small character here called Tom Hanks who has one line I will be just I'll be reading that Kenny have an Australian accent yeah yeah this was called Australia I forgot yeah man person a and troll one all of them Typecast interior living room night Justin and Ingrid are curled up on a couch watching a movie together good well this movie is

insane hey I'm getting cold blankets I don't think so but I can check if I have some hoodies oh could you get me one sure Justin gets up to go check his drawers on the other side of the stage an audio snippet plays overhead through a recording well uh Tom Hanks from the TV look at me look at me I am the warlord now wow that was good that's a great time hey I think I left my last hoodie at my parents I thought you I saw you put one in the dryer earlier I mean I guess I did so it should be done now that is true so could you grab it for me do I need to come on babe please pause damn it Justin walks past Ingrid to another part of the stage where the drying machine is he opens it up to reveal three little trolls that live inside returned you know what that means guys please don't come on I just need to grab something for my girlfriend please don't do this to me silence giant female giant no your

first riddle please I I really don't want to it walks on four legs in the morning two legs at noon and three legs in the evening what is it I don't know like like a like a handicapped line the answer was it man damn it you have failed to answer a riddle now you must pay the price for every riddle answered falsely we'll take an article of clothing from you it sucks give us your socks but this is my last pair loves and the Mover giant Justin begins to take one of his socks off he hands it over to the trolls oh what a sucker both of them Justin painfully takes off takes off his second sock and hands it over please guys my girlfriend is here I just need to grab my hoodie and I'll get out of here I promise the trolls ignore him and carry on riddle number two oh man what always runs but never walks often murmurs never talks has a bet but never sleeps and has a mouth but never eats Justin pauses for a while

we're waiting no I don't know Andrew is clearly a river I can't do this anymore now give us your shirt yes your shirt yes shirt without putting up a fight Justin complies and takes off a shirt while sobbing now do a little troll dance for us you fat little boy yes dance dance dance the trolls start to chant dance repeatedly while Justin shirtless and sockless cries and does a complex fortnite dance oh you like that don't You Ingrid enters babe why is it taking so long Jesus what happened in here I lost my lost my Australian accent wait let's do it again come on Integrity here babe wait I totally lost it no no you've got it you've got it gotta get in the back of my throat babe what's talking so taking so long Jesus what's happening in here these trolls they moved into my drying machine three weeks ago so they make me answer these riddles they're taking my clothes I haven't worn anything in in 10 days

are you joking it seems your boyfriend is a weak donkey for he has no intelligence in that stupid fat body of his oh he's a little pig boy shut up big boy big boy big boy it's not true this is ridiculous Ingrid grabs a towel from the dryer and begins to rat tail one of the trolls oh no Ang Ingrid does it again hey sorry hey what the [ __ ] stop it Ingrid rat tells the other trolls ow oh Jesus [ __ ] that house come on get out of here come on now get Ingrid continually rat tells the trolls until they leave yes yeah that's what I'm [ __ ] talking about not so fun now huh this isn't the last you've seen we'll be back for your clothes soon Ingrid whistles and gives one last rat tail oh [ __ ] the trolls exit wow thanks you've really saved my life anytime babe hail Satan hail wow oh that was a journey that was amazing perfect sketch that is really nice ripping it up that was it that was good I just I'm up to 27. yes

RIP that SketchUp I like that again it's like ripping up the guitar after a solo afterwards it's not something that's typically done maybe we do it here oh [ __ ] I ripped the wrong page oh [ __ ] I ripped the wrong side that sketch is uh uh one of those sketches that I feel like anyone who you were to cast if you were to put it up on stage they would have the trolls would have so much fun yeah like even regardless of audience reaction because I do think it's funny but even beyond that the actors would be like yeah you get to make me be a sadistic control and dance around that stage [ __ ] yes it's exactly who I want to be it's a very fun sketch very very fun trolls are always funny trolls are always funny I've seen I've seen it I've seen a lot of troll sketches and it never doesn't work I've seen a lot of troll improv and it never doesn't never know yeah just turn into it just be like sorry guys uh I'm Not a

Human Being I'm a troll man and that's how you win comedy I love trolls getting hurt yeah I love the two lines of this sketch though the uh the closing two lines the hell sayings yeah that's great but sometimes it's like how do you end a sketch there's people have been doing it for years and years and years no one really knows yeah funny line but if you can't do that just yeah you can do the inverted end whatever you want yeah you can invert the ending you can do whatever but just a throwaway line is a joke it's also fine I saw this sketch on SNL uh maybe a year or two ago that was it was like it was Owen Wilson and it was like a receipt sketch did you guys see that no the way they ended I loved it I mean the sketch was was Garbage Guys the sketch was not great but like uh the premise of it is it's like its own Wilson who's at the table and uh they're ordering food and basically uh the waiter comes in and so you guys want

to split the check you want to pay together and they're like oh we'll split it we'll split it and all right so who had uh who had the burger almost goes uh it was me and who had the sound who had the uh who had like the the french fries and almost me again and the game of the Skechers it's like Owen Wilson ordered like a million things and then it like escalates to like and who ordered like the flowers with a note that say Denise take me back I need whatever and Owen's like uh whatever and everyone's like ah come on right and the sketches it's funny for the first 40 seconds and then it tanks really quick it's a digital sketch right it is yeah but then what happened they end it by like after like maybe three minutes of this same like they're just doing the same thing like Keenan Thompson just like it cuts to like wide angle like a movie thing and King adopter just goes like damn it tell me where the treasure

is and it turns into like it goes into like a like an Indiana Jones parody out of nowhere and it ends in like a standoff with guns and um the point being I love the way this sketch ended that's the end of my sentence now any other any other any other thoughts on that last sketch that we just saw because I just love trolls I love to just be a troll I'd love to just like live in the subway and be a troll we would all want to be in trouble everybody wants to be well you're gonna love us guys because they have two movies made by Dreamworks if I'm not you're kidding me right now the troll the trolls movies they made with Anna Kendrick and Justin Timberlake yeah where they sing yeah trolls World Tour that was one of those that's right and troll two yeah that's troll two is definitely not one of those DreamWorks movies and not anything else all right what's up next all right our last sketch is a brief one it's two

pages uh it's called Schrodinger sucks this is like this would be like a fun like one to put on youtube.com youtube.com All right so I'll be uh actually Sam will be doing stage directions wow Nico Will Roll uh read for Schrodinger and John you will be reading the role of friend oh beautiful thank you so much I'm glad to be cast of course of course Schrodinger sucks by Kristoff Von munchau hey schrodigger I'm back from my holiday thanks for watching my cat oh yeah of course speaking of the little devil where is he oh he's he's right here Schrodinger brings a box what is this your cat what is he inside of the box well precisely however at this moment he is in a state where he can hypothetically be considered to be both alive and dead why would he be dead until you open this box uh his fate is linked to a random subatonic event that may or may not occur what did you do to my cat the friend

opens the Box oh my God he's dead very well and you killed him what by opening the box you have this is great by opening the box you have taken direct responsibility for suspending the quantum state of superposition in which your cat existed Inside the Box what the [ __ ] are you talking about this new Theory I invented it's called Schrodinger's Cat and we agree that you basically sorry and we agree that you basically killed your cat not me and the logic checks out so it's all on you did you forget to feed my cat and then try to play off his death as some kind of groundbreaking new theory of quantum physics that you just invented pause it's so hard to remember when he eats I'm calling the kids that's awesome awesome so great that's really good thinking man's humor if you will yeah I think I I really like the sketch a lot thank you this is my favorite of the four for sure awesome okay let's all go around and say

what our favorite sketch of the forest and a fun thing about ourselves okay yeah I had a fun thing about it dumb joke it's your show no it was no it was it good okay no that was a funny sketch you should feel proud of thank you um anyone else got anything to say about that I yeah I liked it I feel like uh I wish there was more of it I think I think you could probably do another two two moves on this one yeah I think it'd be funny if instead of maybe uh not feeding the cat he brutally murdered the cat like was it like it's clearly like like with a knife like he opens the box the cat is just like I mean we've all been there if we've been around the cat you know sometimes you just want to kill it wow look at that yeah that's funny he's got the it's got like knife wounds in it we can't Graphics no it was alive or dead until you opened the box your hands are bleeding this must have been reason

yeah how could you how dare you kill your cat like that I want to see like a whole series of these where they like where you like write about famous theorists or even like psychologists and like what they did but like put like a funny twist yeah how many are there how many how many scientists have there if you could do at least just two more Newton I would be happy that's crazy I have I have a very I have this is I like is totally the sense of humor that I love I have something that's similar for Freud oh yeah oh that's crazy it's about [ __ ] mom [ __ ] minutes it's so easy it's just but it's about like it's like uh I can't remember how I I had an angle on on him being a demon [ __ ] that I couldn't that I don't remember what it was that was made it be like well I think the thing is he tries to pass it off is like oh we all do this yeah yeah everyone wants to [ __ ] their moms and it's this a priority thing that we all

have it's like I'm pretty sure you just want yeah I have a fancy PhD man like I went to school I don't want to [ __ ] my mom because I have a PhD there's like notes on your PhD paper it says like to my best boy I don't know are you true your mom's tits here I think I had is like it's like a bunch of all the old tiny scientists hanging out and they're all like talking about their cool new theories and then Freud is like doesn't fit in yeah so then they're like they're like Freud and like what theory do you have he's like uh like everyone wants to [ __ ] their mom no I'm trying to bust yeah in my mom that's my theory I'm trying to do Mom busting yeah um but yeah I like the sketch a lot thank you real quick I just want to ask uh I want to get a little personal I want to ask some personal questions I'm just gonna ask his person I I just want to ask uh just uh we'll start with Kristoff that's me

um uh do you have a certain like method or style that you do when you're writing comedy do you have to go away from people do you write with friends uh do you drink way too much caffeine and and inside some sort of weird comedy psychosis do you mix with your downers yeah like where does comedy come from for you or is it sort of a mixture of everything for sure uh I always think of just like when you're making when you're putting on Comedy maybe it's just easy to Think Through the lens of sketch like I like to think in terms of like choreography and like what is the audience gonna see what's interesting I have like a lot of frustrations like I know we all write game game was meant for sketch and it's great but I feel like every class I've had on like UCB they're like you got to do this you've got like every note I've ever had gamer died it's always like it's always like bring it up bring up

the concept earlier like at the bottom of the page they should like introduce the I'm like that's so boring because that's good enough for UCD yeah even if you bring in like a like a perfect sketch it's never good enough well I mean I get it like the idea of like hey it's a class like we're all gonna sit here and we should all like you want to obviously like do your part and like sound like okay well here's my suggestion uh but no as far as like uh I just think like what's the most rewarding for the audience to see um so like stage like if you're putting on a stage show which is obviously different than like a YouTuber like a tick tock sketch right that's gonna be different but like what's the funniest Vision as you were referring to earlier John like yeah three trolls if like the cast they're all friends and you're just [ __ ] around with your friends and like you get to kind of like jokingly

like yeah pretend to be a sadist to like a guy and you get into troll voice like that's funny costumes yes like something like that is really funny um I don't know I'm trying to think of any examples from the sketch but uh like that's going but as far as like what's the process um it's like written like ever written I've read books on like like a good way to like I think all you really need to do is just like turn off distractions like I did some writing for the show I'm about to put on yesterday and I went to a cafe I had a coffee and it was like just set a goal right if it's like write one or two sketches by the end of the day that's all you need to do and if you see that goal you get that sense of accomplishment um yeah follow-up question uh was there like an event in your life that made you that that was like lightning in a bottle that was just like oh I'm doing this now like this is

a part of me now yeah for sure uh in college I never got into our uh I didn't get into our improv team both two years I auditioned we only had one yeah and I literally did that I did CPR on my own myself you committed I committed yeah with uh just on my lower abdomen repeatedly uh but I didn't do that and then I did I did stand up and like we formed a comedy um I like became the the head of like our stand-up scene because that was the only thing where he's like there's no rejections you can join this and then we formed a sketch team like for everyone to like audition and apply and it wasn't like and we had an open writer's room and I loved just be like my favorite just doing this podcast today is like so much fun because just being able to sit and read in the writer's room is so much fun but as far as like oh this is out of all like the three streams like improv stand up or sketch uh I saw the television series Mr

show yeah yeah Bob and David Bob Odenkirk David Cross and for me like that just like felt like so so much my thing and I really was like oh this is this is the funniest thing it's like half it's all stage but it's digital there's like a smarminess to it it's just very it's like so entertaining to watch you never really know what's gonna happen next and then just like going from there and like watching other like being able to talk about sketch harmony with other people that are into it is so much fun like it's like quoting Tim Robinson yeah people yeah that's always a ton of fun even like [ __ ] talking SNL is like always a good time where you're like yeah that sketch sucks I wouldn't have done it like that I wouldn't put Indiana Jones ending it yeah Keenan can do better yeah I always love like telling people like oh do you guys watch Kids in the Hall you got to watch Kids in the Hall um yeah and stuff like stuff like that

right yeah yeah cool so now I'm gonna ask the same question of you thank you so much for that yeah uh sort of like uh just elaborating on your method if you have a certain thing that works for you or like where comedy comes from for you if there's a certain technique that you sort of do uh and yeah um so I'm coming from like a music background uh where I feel like I put a lot of pressure on myself to practice every day and and whatever like just work really hard at improving at the actual like crafted it and so uh kind of when I came to Comedy I really like wanted to avoid that because I feel like with music it it developed into a very kind of like bad relationship with my self-worth and like that was super tied to this thing that I loved so I'm I'm pretty like right now I'm pretty like loose about what my process is where I feel like I I do a lot of like like I'm big into like I collaborate a lot I write a lot with

other people but I also think I'm like I don't write every day and I feel like a lot of my like ideas come when I'm kind of thinking like it's like back burner kind of stuff where it's like I'll be like you're in the shower you're driving I'm in the shower I'm driving and I try and like put myself in situations where that's gonna it's gonna breed more comedy ideas without directly saying like I'm gonna write every day and like be really hard on myself for it so I I don't know that's kind of where I where I come from Nico if I can I want to say I feel like because you just put on a sketch like a really funny sketch on his on his Instagram um like a magic mic it's so funny and it's it's all it's so organic and I feel like that is like a very like fast and like loose and it's like it's it's very organic and it's so like rewarding and funny to watch thank you that means a lot I appreciate it yeah and I'll never

say anything nice about you again after I complimented your sketch yeah you tore up all of them not this one not this one okay now the podcast is over now it's you you're watching was that camera one you're looking at the first ever break over of a French ship uh uh uh five month five month uh friendship is now over hey Kristoff uh we were never friends jokes on you I never opened up hey Kristoff hey Kristoff if it makes you feel any better we were also never friends this is the worst day of my life and he's leaving sad where can we find both of you where can we find both of you again plug yourself one more time as hard as you can as as high energy as you can

he's getting good hey everybody I know um yeah uh my name is Nico Catanio you can find me on Instagram at Nico Catanio comedy um and everything everything you could possibly want is on there so that's uh for me yeah the Instagram and I guess Twitter handle is Christoph VMP uh and you can find my stuff through there uh March 7th BCC uh Brooklyn comedy Collective uh code comes watch a sketch variety show sorry code come Swatch code code uh we got a show uh facts Tron Corporate Retreat 1996. there are three super funny sketch teams some of the best in the scene we got Angel Eyes we got Craig we got one bad egg they're gonna be right there Craig we got Craig my buddy my friend co-wrote this with me Meredith Eckler she's super funny wow follow her um I forgot the name her handle but like I'm telepathically sending it so come see that we can put it on the screen yeah and then in April watch out for

brunch buddies on Tick Tock at brunch buddies and then the underscore I think Kristoff I hate to break your heart a second time well I guess the third time but um this episode probably won't be out before March 7th that's okay it might be the event will still have been held you can still the socials will still be there yeah awesome yeah what do you want to say can we put a shark on the screen yeah just for you yeah

he said he wanted a bowl of only the brown M M's and a shark on screen and if he didn't get either of those what happens I'm a shitty producer he gets he thought 13 was bad yeah we think it's the 14. well well podcast adjourned this has been table read we are John and Sam and uh thank you thank you so much thank you so much for having just this was really Pleasant yeah this was so great thank everybody is over

Questions about this episode

Who speaks in "Christoph von Münchow | TABLE READ PODCAST"?

Jonathan Gaffney (Host), Samantha Locks (Host), Christoph von Münchow (Guest), Nico Catanio (Guest).

What is "Christoph von Münchow | TABLE READ PODCAST" about?

The content introduces Christoph von Münchow, a 24-year-old improv and sketch comedian from Jamaica, highlighting his diverse background and involvement in the New York comedy scene. The episode features readings of his original sketches, emphasizing a fun, light-hearted atmosphere among the hosts and guests as they engage with the material.

What is mentioned in this Table Read episode?

37 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including Kristoff Von Munchau (Kristoff VMP; Kristoff Von linchao—variant pronunciations in transcript), Trolls, Waluigi, Erwin Schrödinger, Fox Tron Corporate Retreat 96 (Fox Tron Corporate Retreat 1996—variant in transcript), University of St Andrews. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "Christoph von Münchow | TABLE READ PODCAST"?

The episode runs 44 min; the transcript is about 7,523 words in 44 timestamped sections.

More from Table Read

About this transcript: the episode's spoken words as captioned on YouTube, split into timestamped sections. Reclip.Me locates every person, work and idea in the text, keeps the time it is first named, and quotes the words around it verbatim. Last updated December 18, 2025.