LET’S TALK MENTAL HEALTH: WHY SHAME IS THE REAL ENEMY || JAKE AND JOE SHARP || EPISODE 061

What this episode is about

The content discusses the impact of shame on mental health, emphasizing the importance of open communication and support in overcoming personal challenges. Jake and Joe Sharp share their experiences with loss and their mission to help men achieve confidence and wellness through a science-based, shame-free fitness program that encourages individuals to embrace their own unique lifestyles.

Who speaks in this episode?

• KG (Ky) (Host) · 21 min speaking
• Joe Sharp (Guest) · 18 min speaking
• Jake Sharp (Guest) · 15 min speaking
• Sam Sharp (Guest)

What is discussed, and when

1. 0:00 – 5:00: Lifestyle, Overeating, Suicide prevention, A Valley
2. 5:00 – 10:00: Church mission, Personal trainer, Tijuana
3. 10:00 – 15:00: Men's health mental health month
4. 15:00 – 20:00: Lifestyle, Fear-mongering, Lean and Confident program, Bodybuilder
5. 20:00 – 25:00: Lifestyle, Bodybuilder, Body fat percentage, Lean and Confident program
6. 25:00 – 30:00: Lifestyle, Exercise, Overeating, Tik Tok
7. 30:00 – 35:00: Overeating
8. 35:00 – 40:00: Lifestyle, Bodybuilder, Overeating, Patience
9. 40:00 – 45:00: Calories, Lifestyle
10. 45:00 – 50:00: Calories, Lifestyle, Overeating, Lean and Confident program
11. 50:00 – 54:17: Code to Winning, J Duo Fit, Joe Sharp, JS Sharp

Notable quotes from "LET’S TALK MENTAL HEALTH: WHY SHAME IS THE REAL ENEMY || JAKE AND JOE SHARP || EPISODE 061"

• Behind it, you can do that. Yeah. We want people to live their way, their lifestyle. And that's what we're helping people do is finding what works for them. like what gets them…

  about Lifestyle · at 1:14

• To talk a lot about if you're curious in learning a lot about like overcoming overeating struggling mental health suicide prevention all these different components this is the…

  about Overeating · at 2:10

• A mechanism that to try and cope with the pain that they feeling internally, pornography, drugs, all these different stuff. And so, regarding the whole situation right now, I…

  about Pornography · at 15:14

• Really want to stress that because there's so there's so much fear-mongering out there around nutrition especially. there's so much fear-mongering on like what you should you…

  about Fear-mongering · at 16:54

• And a lot of people think that's well, I have to restrict everything. I have to be a bodybuilder. I have to do this or I fail or I don't get the results. And Joe and I just…

  about Bodybuilder · at 18:25

• Pictures of you guys before the transformation respectfully. You guys look like Teletubbies. Tinky Winky and Dipsy.

  about Tinky Winky · at 19:37

• On Zoom calls and to be able to build community in our audience like our platforms Instagram, Tik Tok, it's so it helps because connection is such a big answer to mental health…

  about Tik Tok · at 25:46

• Keep it off like how did you build that transformation and it's simp it is just being more aware of your calories and your protein that's where I would start and that's where…

  about Calories · at 40:55

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

People

• Joe Sharp — Person · 1 mention · first at 53:52
  Yeah. Yeah, Facebook's also JS Sharp Joe Sharp. It's another social that we have. but yeah, that's where they find us.
• Adam KY — Person · 1 mention
• Jennifer Jacob — Person · 1 mention
• KG — Person · 1 mention

Companies & orgs

• Tik Tok — Company · 2 mentions · first at 25:53
• Ju Fit — Company · 1 mention · first at 2:00
  Jacob and Joseph. All right, without further ado, they are the CEOs of Ju Fit. The entire purpose of their program is to try and help and uplift men to become lean and…
• Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints — Company · 1 mention · first at 3:55
  We were born and still a part of the Church of Jesus Christ, the Latter-day Saints. Huge church. a lot of people know it as the Mormon Church, but yeah.
• Mormon Church — Company · 1 mention · first at 3:59
  Church of Jesus Christ, the Latter-day Saints. Huge church. a lot of people know it as the Mormon Church, but yeah.
• J Duo Fit — Company · 1 mention · first at 53:23
  Yeah. You're going to find me and Jake J Duo Fit. We're the dynamic duo, the twins. on Instagram, Tik Tok and then just find us there and then DM us through Instagram and we could get you hooked up with lean the leaning.
• JS Sharp — Company · 1 mention · first at 53:49
  Yeah. Yeah, Facebook's also JS Sharp Joe Sharp. It's another social that we have. but yeah, that's where they find us.

Concepts & topics

• Lifestyle — Concept · 20 mentions · first at 1:18
• Overeating — Concept · 12 mentions · first at 2:14
• Bodybuilder — Concept · 6 mentions · first at 18:32
• Calories — Concept · 6 mentions · first at 41:02
• Lean and Confident program — Concept · 5 mentions · first at 1:05
  Doing it in the wrong way. So, it's just making sure it's we want to really stress that the lean and confident program is sciencebased. It's sciencebacked and it's shamefree.…
• Fear-mongering — Concept · 3 mentions · first at 16:58
• Code to Winning — Concept · 2 mentions · first at 1:30
  They're looking for that they've always wanted, but also something that actually the code to winning insights you need today to seize the world tomorrow. Today we have double…
• Suicide prevention — Concept · 2 mentions · first at 2:17
  Learning a lot about like overcoming overeating struggling mental health suicide prevention all these different components this is the episode for you considering the fact that they've experienced something very significant also very.
• Pornography — Concept · 2 mentions · first at 15:18
• Tinky Winky — Concept · 2 mentions · first at 19:40
• Patience — Concept · 2 mentions · first at 36:48
  Habits better because at the end of the day, it's just lifestyle habits and patience. That's how that's how you're going to get the results. That's how you become someone lean and healthy, lean and confident is creating that lifestyle.
• Fitness industry — Concept · 1 mention · first at 1:49
  Brothers, people I've known for a while, people that have been very transformative in the fitness industry.
• The cloud — Concept · 1 mention · first at 4:10
  We've spoken and we had an episode about 2 years ago. Unfortunately, it's up in the cloud somewhere. So, one of these days, through the help of Elon, we might be able to…
• Medical school — Concept · 1 mention · first at 4:47
  Early age, but we didn't we maybe thought we always thought we would be like going to medical school or my dad's a PA, my nur my mom was a nurse, my sister's a nurse, my wife's…
• Personal trainer — Concept · 1 mention · first at 5:01
  That route. But sometimes in high school, we're Hey, maybe we're like a personal trainer. But we never thought we'd do something like this until a life-changing moment in our own lives that we got into the gym in high school and.
• Church mission — Concept · 1 mention · first at 7:10
  The last four or five years it's always bring me back like what if I didn't go out on a church mission would he still would he still be here? yeah, it's never something I ever planned for and it's.
• Men's health mental health month — Concept · 1 mention · first at 12:16
  What you guys have been doing to especially right now being mental health month men's health mental health month right now. I want to lead to a question before I continue.…
• Evidence — Concept · 1 mention · first at 17:16
  To live but not a lot of it is science-based and actually backed by the evidence and so that's what we have taken the time to study are role modeling oursel after the people that are actually science-based and know what they're.
• Teletubbies — Concept · 1 mention · first at 19:40
  Pictures of you guys before the transformation respectfully. You guys look like Teletubbies. Tinky Winky and Dipsy.
• Body fat percentage — Concept · 1 mention · first at 20:31
  Guys might think like lean is like bodybuilder lean. No, that's not what we're talking about is a healthy body fat percentage. And with between men and women, it might be…
• Exercise — Concept · 1 mention · first at 26:43
  Feeling with your past mistakes, your mental health, depression, anxiety, why exercise intertwines with all of that, why what how could you approach nutrition in a sustainable…
• Carnivore — Concept · 1 mention · first at 35:40
  Right now. Like they think that they have to be a certain way, whether they have to be the carnivore bro, they have to be the bodybuilder bro, or they have to be the bikini…
• Bikini model — Concept · 1 mention · first at 35:46
  Have to be the carnivore bro, they have to be the bodybuilder bro, or they have to be the bikini model or else you're not you're not anything. You came to get this healthy…
• Sharp brothers — Concept · 1 mention · first at 54:04
  Awesome. yeah, the coach winning insights you need today to seize the world tomorrow. JD, fit the sharp brothers. Thank you very much, brothers.
• Dipsy — Concept · 1 mention
• grief — Concept · 1 mention
• Laa-Laa — Concept · 1 mention
• Lean and Confident community — Concept · 1 mention
• Men's mental health — Concept · 1 mention
• Nurse — Concept · 1 mention
• PA — Concept · 1 mention
• Po — Concept · 1 mention
• Science-based fitness/nutrition — Concept · 1 mention
• Steps — Concept · 1 mention
• Suicidal ideation — Concept · 1 mention
• Weight loss plateau — Concept · 1 mention

Places & events

• A Valley — Place · 1 mention · first at 3:49
  Born and raised in the A Valley. Yep.
• Tijuana — Place · 1 mention · first at 5:37
  Jake actually went to Tijuana. I went to Pueba just for a couple months. and then we ended up losing our little brother. his name was Sam to he died by suicide in 2020 March 13th. H.
• Idaho — Place · 1 mention
• Puebla — Place · 1 mention

Full transcript with timestamps

0:00 we do something like this until a life-changing moment in our own lives that we got into the gym in high school and we kind of did the whole thing. We got lean. We finally gained a little bit of confidence in ourselves. We ended up losing our little brother. His name was Sam. He died by suicide in 2020, March 13th. So, until that point, I don't think we had such a huge purpose. No, I uh I answered the call and I remember my mom and dad already crying and when I heard his name like I couldn't control myself. I legit started screaming and trying to deal with it the best I could.

0:45 Regarding the whole situation right now, I just feel like it's important for us to fully understand that like it's okay to talk to someone. It's okay to follow up what you guys have been doing. societies that involve people opening up. So much of social media is, hey, you need to do it like this way or you're doing it in the wrong way. So, it's just making sure it's we want to really stress that the lean and confident program is sciencebased. It's sciencebacked and it's shamefree. That's why we say you can eat whatever you want. Yeah. Once you know the science behind it, you can do that. Yeah. We want people to live their way, their lifestyle. And that's what we're helping people do is finding what works for them. like what gets them the results they're looking for that they've always wanted, but also something that actually the code to winning insights you need today to seize the world tomorrow. Today

1:37 we have double duo. We have a special guest or special guests rather. We have twins in the studio. These are my brothers, people I've known for a while, people that have been very transformative in the fitness industry. They go by Jake and Joe. or I call them Jacob and Joseph. All right, without further ado, um they are the CEOs of um Ju Fit. The entire purpose of their program is to try and help and uplift men to become lean and confident in their process and in their transformation as well. Um we're going to talk a lot about if you're curious in learning a lot about like overcoming overeating um struggling uh mental health um suicide prevention all these different components uh this is the episode for you considering the fact that they've experienced something very very uh significant also very life-changing in their life as well which we're going to dive deep in at the same time. So without further ado, our

2:34 amazing and special guests Jake and Joe. How you doing, brothers? Hey, that was amazing. I love that intro. I don't think me and Jake have ever been introduced like that.

2:47 I freaking love that, KG. And all up to you. It's been great getting to know you. Um, and as we dive deeper into these topics that, like you said, could be heavy. um suicide prevention, all the struggles mentally um and then just the the frustration of um building a healthy lifestyle and what that looks like and overcoming an overeating habit, dropping shame, all these deep topics. I know we're going to touch a lot of people's lives today.

3:15 Love it. Making me feel some type of way at the beginning of the podcast. I'm just joking. Um, no. During the podcast, you'll probably um hear us go between two different um two different big reasons why we created this brand, why we created this business, and um we're excited to share it all. Awesome stuff. And so, you guys were born and raised in Arizona your whole entire lives. Were you guys like uh like born in Christianity and stuff like that? Can you can you kind of go into it? Yeah. Born and raised in um the A Valley. Yep.

3:52 We were born um and still a part of the Church of Jesus Christ, the Latter-day Saints. Huge church. Um a lot of people know it as the Mormon Church, but yeah.

4:01 Awesome stuff. All right. So, I I'm I'm very curious. And I mean, you and I, we we've spoken and we had an episode about 2 years ago. Unfortunately, uh it's up in the cloud somewhere. So, one of these days, through the help of Elon, we might be able to retrieve it. But as for now,

4:17 the work must move forward as well. So I want to talk a bit um about the lifechanging events um that may have happened in in your lives as well. So if we can just start before you started this J doofit um what led to you guys starting this uh specific program? Yeah. So, we we kind of got into fitness at an early age, but we didn't

4:45 we maybe thought we always thought we would be like going to medical school or my dad's a PA, my nur my mom was a nurse, my sister's a nurse, my wife's actually a nurse. So, we always thought we were going to go that route, like that route. But sometimes in high school, we're like, "Hey, maybe we're like a personal trainer." But we never thought um we'd do something like this um until a a life-changing moment in our own lives um that we we got into the gym in high school and we kind of did the whole thing. We got lean.

5:23 Um we we finally gained a little bit of confidence in ourselves and then um we went to go serve um our church missions for the Church of Jesus Christ in Mexico.

5:36 Mhm. Jake actually went to uh Tijuana. I went to Pueba just for a couple months. Um and then we ended up losing our little brother. um his name was Sam to uh he died by suicide in 2020 March 13th. H so until that point I don't think we had such a huge purpose. We we never even considered like owning a business, doing the whole entrepreneurship route, having like this big calling from God in our hearts to go impact people in this way.

6:18 So everything changed after that. And and Jake, you were in in Mexico as well at that time, right?

6:24 Yeah. Um and how was it when you guys received the news? I'll let Joe tell his piece, but um I was I was caught off guard. Um the mission is hard for its own reasons, trying to learn a new language, get accustomed to a new culture, um dealing with all the standards that a mission brings. um just being away from everyone that you've ever loved. But then having to receive that call was never never my plan and it always the last four or five years it's always bring me back like what if I didn't go out on a church mission would he still would he still be here? Um yeah, it's never something I ever planned for and it's um still to this day like I remember walking up that hill in Tijana.

7:34 We were coming back from a family and I already had like a a feeling that something was off. I got a call from first my uh my church leader that that was saying that my parents had to talk to me and I was already like dreading the the call because I knew something had to be wrong.

8:00 Did it ever cross your mind that it could be Sam? No, no. I uh I started I I answered the call and I remember my mom and dad already crying and when I heard his name like I couldn't control myself. Um I I legit started screaming and um trying to deal with it the best I could. Um, but yeah, it's still it still like brings me back to that moment. I still have all the same emotions like if I if I take time to think about it. Um, and I I still question like would things be different if I stayed home? But um, yeah, I don't know.

8:57 And for you, Joe, can you recall the moment you received the news and how it was for you?

9:04 Yeah. Cuz you never forget that day. No, I don't think I think if you ask anyone that has lost someone in a tragedy in any way, whether it's suicide, whether it's a car crash or anything, that that call is like something you have nightmares about. It's it's something that the little things could bring yourself back to. It's like when you hear that moment or like you hear that whether you were there or you're receiving a call from a family member telling you something happened. It's like my body like in a way like my body remembers that. And just like Jake said that it's the weirdest feeling like out there in the doing normal missionary activities in Mexico and then like that that day I already had a feeling like throughout the day that something was dark or something was up and then I got called into the mission president's office. I had no clue. Like I thought it was for like I was getting assigned to a

10:16 new area or something like that. Just like some some normal mission stuff, but you never forget the the pain of that first like first realization that something like this could happen. like our our our best friend, our little brother that was at home alone felt that much pain to um choose to take his own life. It's like I just remember pulling at my hair, screaming, being angry with God, all all the emotions, it's everything. And I think that's Yeah. I just love what you guys have shared right now. Um, and I think from like my studies of this the topic is you get to understand that at that point in time they saw no way out like they saw this to be the only solution to overcome the internal pain that has been building up over time as well. And um it's hard because there's so many external factors like would have, should have, could have. Had I been in the US rather than being in Mexico, had I been in that presence,

11:36 what could have happened as well. And you can go to as much therapy as possible. Nothing will ever be the same again. You can heal, but the loved one is not going to be there. You know what I'm saying? And I think that's the hard thing about it is the fact that you can heal, but they're gone. You know what I'm saying? And uh one of the things I love about your guys's Instagram page um by the way it's the fastest growing Instagram page in all of Arizona. We know.

12:03 So um JD your foot's going to be down at the in the comment section as well. But you guys have brought a lot of awareness there which I kind of want to go into what you guys have been doing um to especially right now being uh mental health month men's health mental health month right now. I want to lead to a question before I continue. Statistics have shown in the last six years that the suicide rate among men has been increasing at a rapid pace, three times more than women, and is significantly going higher as well. Why do you think that's the case among men and young young guys and and people that are yeah male?

12:41 I I personally think there's a lot of different factors to it, but I think one of the main reasons is um the shame around men and the the inability to maybe express emotion emotion to feel safe around other people to talk about the things that they may be battling inside their head. I think even society sometimes shuts men down to feel a certain way. I think a lot of it stems back to that. And then of course there's other factors like um them never feeling enough for anyone. um them battling certain financial stat like financial things in life providing I think there's so many different things but it comes back to uh shame your the inability to uh express express emotion and process things.

13:45 Yeah, I think Joe hit on the two biggest ones is being able to be open and honest with someone. um about the things that you're going through without being like um shamed for it or put down about it because like as guys or as men, we're always told that um

14:06 nobody cares. Yeah. Nobody cares. Just just keep working harder. Keep keep doing what you need to be doing. And there's there's so much truth to that is is taking that responsibility. But the the other side of that is actually being in touch with your emotions and being able to work through those. And so many men just shove them down. um don't open up to the people around them and they just take on all this weight. And it gets to a point where they just can't anymore and they they maybe suffer with mental health issues or in other ways even too with addictions or other bad habits. We we see it all the time. But just being able to have people to open up to and work through those emotions. um and not be shamed about it are two big reasons.

15:02 And it's also been proven obviously with a lot of addictions, everything has got a psychological um effect on it and everything psychological. So sometimes in addictions that have been facing through men, whether it be alcohol, it's a mechanism that to try and cope with the pain that they feeling internally, pornography, drugs, all these different stuff. And so, um, regarding the whole situation right now, I just feel like it's important for us to, uh, fully understand that like it is it's okay to talk to someone. It's it's okay to form up what you guys have been doing.

15:36 Societies that are that involve people opening up because men usually open up with people they trust. Women, it's a little easier. You meet her at a bar, she tells me a whole life story. I'm like, "What the heck? My name's Ky. Let's start there." You know? So those are the repercussions. So it is

15:56 we had an internal joke of repercussions by the way. So so I think that's important and I think um which I kind of want to go into what you're doing. One of the things I love about the lean and confident program is the fact you guys have stressed on the importance that listen it is okay for you to eat certain stuff but it's about the level of discipline. Can we kind of segue into that and if there are any repercussions of with what you eat?

16:24 Yeah, I love the word repercussions. Listen, no, the thing is um we like I love that you said you could eat whatever you want. I don't want you guys watching listening to this or watching this think, oh, these guys just eat whatever they want. That's because that's not not the case. Um, we the leaning confident program and the community that we we built in our building is sciencebased. I me and Jake really want to stress that um because there's so there's so much fear-mongering out there around nutrition especially. there's so much fear-mongering on like what you should you need to be doing trainingwise um the specific lifestyle that you need to uh live but not not a lot of it is science-based and actually backed by the evidence and so that's what we have taken the time to study um um are role modeling oursel after the people that are actually science-based and know what they're talking about to make sure we're

17:30 teaching the right people uh like the right things to our people so they're not like

17:37 confused by all the fear-mongering online because that's such a huge thing because fitness nutrition

17:42 that's so much of social media is hey you need to do it this like this way or you're doing it the wrong way

17:49 so it's just making sure it's we want to really stress that the lean and confident program is sciencebased um it's sciencebacked and it's shamefree that's why we say you Eat whatever you want. Once you know the science behind it, you can do that.

18:05 Yeah. We want people to live their their way, their lifestyle. And that's what we're helping people do is finding what works for them, like what gets them the results they're looking for that they've always wanted, but also something that actually sticks and becomes a part of who they are. Um, and a lot of people think that's well, I have to restrict everything. I have to be a bodybuilder. I have to do this or I fail or um I don't get the results. And uh Joe and I just don't think that's the case. We don't see it with the people that we work with. the real results, the the people that we see winning on the lean and confident. Not only ourselves, but our clients are the people that learn how to um drop their shame behind their eating habits, their workout habits, um and build a lifestyle, build those habits that work time and time again that um keep them feeling good, getting the results. um

19:15 and finding the joy through it all. I'm I'm grateful you guys touched on that. And sometimes social media does put that way because you see a lot of the trendy stuff where you have to wake up at 4:00 a.m. jump on the pool at 5 and then by 5 or you know 5 you have to like dive in the water as well. So there's 5 minutes when you're up in the air. What the heck's going on down there? But lean on confidence back onto that. And I've seen you guys the pictures of you guys before um the transformation respectfully. You guys look like Teletubbies. You know, Tinky Winky and Dipsy.

19:44 That's a good That's a good description. I think we write that down. Write that down. I think we've actually Yeah. Jake said we've actually used like the Teletubby um

19:54 music behind one of the like transformation photos. That's gold. No. Oh, the reason I'm adding on that, uh when I've been training within the past few days, they have been pushing me beyond my limits. It's the first time I've been in the gym so many times consecutively and everything that they teach is what they live by as well which has been a very very exciting thing which I fully concur. So um speaking about that transformation and lean and confidence why those phrases we again want to stress lean is healthy and not not I know maybe some of you guys might think like lean is like bodybuilder lean. No, that's not what we're talking about is a healthy body fat percentage. And with between men and women, it might be different. Um, but in a in a lean body fat percentage, so you're living the life that you want to live and you're comfortable with the body that you have. Um, and then confident, confident in your ability to

20:49 sustain this lifestyle, confident in the body that you're building, the body that you have, um, and confident in, um, the tools that you have to take care of your mental health. That's why it's the lean and confident program and community. I think, uh, there's so much behind our our brand why we wanted to coin lean and confident. We you guys we just talked a whole lot about Sam and he's in time into our purpose but also as Joe and I's story as well like going through high school we didn't have the confidence we we were actually struggling mentally a lot and then we left on our missions um gained a bunch of weight and then got that call. Um

21:39 how much did you gain? Telly Tubby, tell me how much you gain. Who was Tinky Winky among the two of you?

21:46 I was watch What are the other babies? Hey, I'm so I'm embarrassed. I know all four of the names, bro. Like, I didn't watch it by choice. I I had a little I didn't even have I had a little brother and so I just saw I can't even know like the colors of them. I think Tinky Winky's purple and I think like there's like Dipsy, Lala, and Po.

22:07 Oh, now it's coming back. I don't know how I know them all, but that's a story for another day.

22:11 Uh yeah, I gained 55 lbs in 4 months. I gained uh like 40 to 45 lbs in 3 months.

22:19 So So we put it on and we can still put on weight so fast um if we didn't live the leaning confident lifestyle. Um, but there's so much behind the confident part on Joe and I finally finding our confidence, building the right tools, the skills, dropping the shame that we've built over 10 years of

22:44 bad food habits, um, bad habits in general, whether that's pornography, um, beating ourselves up,

22:53 that confident phrase is so much more than just like freaking trying to look good in the mirror or whatever, like um being that bodybuilder. It's so much more than that. Um leaning confident is hopefully um going to change each individual that we want like that watches our stuff. It's it's not about us. It's it's about them building their own lean and confident lifestyle so they're confident in themselves and they keep working and building a life they want. Man, I love what the both of you said a lot and you can tell um the transformation that has happened and there's a purpose behind it like your brother Sam and trying to um avoid and prevent a lot of people that may be feeling that way as well

23:42 because you'd be surprised that even sometimes among our closest circle, it takes a certain level of

23:49 bringing the walls down before somebody can actually end up like exposing and talking about what is really like ex you know bothering them. And obviously um once you experience a suicide very close to a family naturally you start randomly checking up on people like is everything okay? You know something you've never done before

24:10 and then like you just randomly keep calling is everything all right? like are you are because you you don't want to try and and see something happen like that again because it's a pain that is so hard to get out of. It's like a dark place where you're just completely overwhelmed by so much of pain, anguish and just bitterness like questions that are not answered and that can go unanswered as well for a long time. And I think it's it's important that confidence is first instilled within us before we can try and like push it and and help other people. And I've seen it with both of you as well. And a confident man can conquer anything. You know what I'm saying? But more importantly, they can be able to um provide for their family. They can be able to look in the mirror and overcome the challenges that they're facing.

24:58 Confidence is such a big part of a man's attribute. And once it's fully gained, not the fake ones you see on social media and they say it, I'm not going to go into those bloody gurus, but

25:10 let's go in, but confidence is is is of utmost importance. So, I'm grateful you guys shared that, which kind of like segus now into other communities. So, what what's part of your community? What do you guys do in those communities?

25:24 I I love I think my favorite Yes, of course. I think we love getting um having the opportunity to work with someone one-on-one and getting deep with them on what their struggles might be and helping them change their life. Mhm.

25:39 But the group aspect of this and to me and Jake to meet with um people weekly on Zoom calls and to be able to build community in our audience um like our our platforms Instagram, Tik Tok, it's so it helps because connection is is such a big answer to mental health um physical health, building a healthy lifestyle, healthy connection with others. um and what that looks like is so important to me and Jake and we know that it's important for everyone to for their mental well-being as well. So, um with our community, we we really try to um especially on these group calls every week. It's it's our favorite thing to do because we open up topics that are deep.

26:32 Um we talk about um the shame of overeing, shame that you might be feeling with your past mistakes, your mental health, depression, anxiety, why exercise um intertwines with all of that, why what how could you approach nutrition in a sustainable way, all these all these deep topics and and going through topics with a community that people feel understood, people feel like, hey, these people might feel the same way as me. It helps people feel like they have they could take another step forward that they could find hope when they might not see it. Cuz like you were saying, KG, it's like a lot of people are stuck and and we know this personally talking to so many people that have reached out. So many people, they don't feel the light. They they don't see light. They they like me and Jake could talk about hope and and tell them that they matter, but a lot of times there's so much darkness and they're

27:37 swallowed up with this darkness that they can't even like they don't know the next step.

27:42 That's why connection matters so much. Connection in their daily life like it not only with like people online but real connection with real people. And I think a community brings that aspect out where they feel seen and they feel like they could take a next step.

28:02 And before Jake speaks on that, I I want to stress on that that whole connection thing which I like so much. And as I've been going from city to city, um there's something that when I've been with you guys in in in Phoenix that even if we may be like, let's say a different part of your place, the fact that you know someone is there, you know what I'm saying? And that's what I realized when you start like putting the dots together like as human beings, we are social creatures. We crave connection. We need connection. And that's why from our beliefs, we know that our family is the most important social unit for time and all eternity. And that's what God designed us and put us in families. But not just that, the fact that we are social people and we can overcome these anxieties, the depressions if we connect in a deeper level of what Joe just said.

28:50 Sorry Jake, you're saying no, I just wanted to um follow Joe. I don't know why I'm smiling about this. Sorry. Forgive me. But um um connection is huge. I was going to mention just examples like how many times just going to the group call that we hold or like connecting with our community has helped me like overcome some bad bad um depression or even like overeating habits that have stacked up. Um, just getting around people that are doing the same has even helped me when I'm I'm supposed to be like the the coach. Um, being around people that are on the same journey, building this lifestyle has helped me see the light more, has helped me find the joy in this process more.

29:41 Um, and I even we just did a I'm remembering a concept piece we just put out on connection. Um, and some of our examples were like dealing with the suicide, dealing with life's troubles, like the things that happened that that really beat you up. There's been so many times where we're what saved saved us or like what has gotten us out of that place was going to hang out with family, being around our nieces and nephews, just having a good time, getting around good friends. Um has literally helped us so many times. I can't even count. Um like when you really feel like ah this is it. Like I'm going to stay in this dark place forever. like I can't I don't know how to get myself out. Um, reach out to someone. Reach out to a friend. Reach out to a family member and you'll begin to to find that light.

30:44 You'll begin to find that joy again. I I really believe that. Yeah. And I I think I would add that for those that want to help and reach out to maybe people that are struggling mentally and you don't know, it's it's often the people that feel like, oh, they have it all together. Like you see them and they they have it all together. It's often those people that are making people laugh, that are helping other people, but they're they're not talking about something that they're going through. It's like that that that's one of the key things about our little brother Sam is he was the guy that was constantly reaching out to other people and making other people smile and um being the man to uh show like that Christlike love, the pure love for people. But a lot of his even high school friends or of course our family kind of knew the struggles that he was going through, but a lot of the people were blindsided with

31:52 his um his passing because he looked fine on the outside. So, it's to you guys that are like questioning when I should reach out. It's these these people check in on every everyone because everyone it's got to be like people go through things. That's just life. But even the people that look put together

32:17 and I I couldn't agree more. Um and it's also the genuiness and how you reach out. It's I think it's so important as well. Um because you guys have experienced me at some of my lowest low, but there's never been a time where you guys haven't failed to like say, "Hey, listen, KG. Uh we know what you've experienced in your life. Like, we love you and do this." Sometimes people just don't know how to act in certain situations. And it's it's hard to really say because they've never experienced a a certain level of like a deeper um or a close person, you know, commit suicide or something like that. So, it's harder for them to reach out cuz they're like, "Okay, what the heck do I say? Let me just go like a post on Instagram." No, no, no. Just go out there and literally just reach out. Sometimes it doesn't even require you talking. It just requires your presence cuz your presence is a present.

33:08 KG Shakespeare. Drop that. Yeah. Your presence is present. I don't know. No, I couldn't agree more. And so, now back to the the overeating part.

33:21 Mhm. You know, one of the leading causes in the United States of death is actually obesity.

33:26 Yep. Bloody McDonald's. Fast over. There we go. Okay. Fix that terminology. Precisely. Thank you for the correction. Thank you very much.

33:39 Why is it such a concern that people just seem to be overeating right now? I'm glad that you brought that up. Jake, you could go into this, but before Jake,

33:48 are you trying to say something? Yeah. Why you say Jake should go into it? Is it a

33:53 Oh, I just want to say with what you said is like we just we were just talking about this on Instagram and and we we always talk about this. Obesity and suicide are one of the main pro two of the main problems in the world today with um mortality rate like people dying. And so that's why me and Jake are focusing on these topics like overeating, shame because we know these these shame is the driver of a lot of this um overeating and um mental health struggles. Yeah. I would before I go into like why we think um there's so much obesity um with what Joe said.

34:40 I just blanked. Give me one sec. Um, what did you just say about obesity and suicide?

34:47 Oh, yes. No. Um, obesity and I would even say like why what's our purpose is to help people with their mental health struggles. Not only like people that have um committed suicide or people that have suicidal ideiations that that have had thoughts of taking their own life, but just mental health struggles depression anxiety because they they go hand in hand, mental health and physical health, they they really do go hand in hand. Um but your to your question on like why do you think obesity rising or

35:28 people overeating? Yeah. I think people um I think social media is a big thing right now. Like they think that they have to be a certain way, whether they have to be the carnivore bro, they have to be the bodybuilder bro, or they have to be the bikini model or else

35:50 you're not you're not anything. You came to get this healthy lifestyle. So, it's a lot of that fear-mongering like we talked about that plays a role in why people just don't

35:59 don't get this right or they try those methods and they're like, "What the hell? I can't get this right. Like, there's no way I can do this. I I love I love my food. I I don't want to be this bodybuilder. So, I'm I I guess it won't work for for me. So, people don't don't focus on the right things. They don't focus on understanding their diet better. They don't focus on understanding their lifestyle better. They don't need to be this

36:32 David Gogggins. They don't need to be this bodybuilder that they they idolize. They they they just got to be them. They just have to understand their diet better. Um understand their lifestyle habits better because at the end of the day, it's just lifestyle habits and patience. That's how

36:50 that's how you're going to get the results. That's how you become someone lean and healthy, lean and confident is creating that lifestyle. um having the right habits and having the patience that this takes to to drop your overeating habit to um build the muscle you want. It it's those three things. And an overeating habit is driven by shame.

37:16 Yeah. Um and driven by shame around food, shame, personal shame with how they feel about themselves. So they don't they just don't think they're worth a healthy lifestyle. That's what we see a lot is they truly believe that like that's why you see a lot of people start a fitness journey maybe 30 minute 30 days in 60 days in and then they

37:38 result back to who they actually believe they are or they who they believe they're worth and so they go back to those same habits

37:46 that they coped with uh overeating all that stuff but I think when you really under like you uncover their shame and the deep internal issues Because someone that may be obese and um struggling with the overeating habit, regardless of what your fitness guru says or some freaking headass online is going to say, these people are not like always lazy. These people are not always undisiplined. There's so much more to that. That's such a blanket statement and so stupid. But these it could be caused by different like trauma, grief factors of like social factors of environment, um your financial like all these different things play a part in why they maybe have overeed to like to become obese.

38:44 And then it's just taking what where they're at now and helping them drop the shame that they built over years. The beliefs that haven't h haven't served them and haven't helped them go go back to a healthy lifestyle and help them just like Jake said, lifestyle, habits, patience, but it's understanding the deep internal issues that these people might be dealing with.

39:09 Joe definitely answered that better than I did. Maybe it's cuz I blanked before that, but he definitely answered your question better.

39:16 Oh, you guys. I am a lot better. Tell them. That's the repercussions of being twins.

39:25 Repercussions. Yeah. No, that's our our internal joke right now is repercussions and all that. Um, what's more important between I know they go hand in hand, but what would you say is more important right now in uh working out or diet?

39:43 Um, I I would say understanding your diet better with Yes. with I we would say especially for

39:51 um your your lifestyle and and dropping weight to a healthy weight um and being able to achieve that goal of yours to build like build a sustainable lifestyle. It's diet drives like 70 80 90% of your results.

40:10 Okay. Literally like macros, your protein, right? Cuz I think I was stressing on one thing. I'm like, gosh dang. Like, I'm not even eating. If anything, I've been eating less the last 2 months. Probably like one big meal a day, but I seem to somehow still be like 3 months pregnant. So, I'm like, what the heck is going on? So, I think it's about the level of protein you get, fiber, all the different stuff, right? So, what would be scenario like would

40:35 in someone's diet that could help them? Yeah, the tactical. I want to keep it simple because that's where real progress is made is when you just understand your diet more in a better way and you keep it simple but like the question that you always get asked is like how did you lose the weight um and keep it off like how how did you build that transformation and it's simp it is just being more aware of your calories and your protein that's where I would start and that's where we start with 99% of our clients is being more aware of your calories and your protein. Focusing on those two things, that's going to be the biggest driver of your results.

41:22 Um, not even like we wouldn't even go um to like tracking every single macro, but just being aware of your calories and protein and focusing on that um does does wonders. That's where you see the most results.

41:39 Yeah. And uh I I eased dropped something actually last night with the two of you which I liked so much. Um Jake and I are very similar in the sense where we need to see results now. You know what I'm saying? And well, I wouldn't say you're that, but I think in a scenario that you and I were talking about and um I'm in the same way with the brand I've been building. It's it's nice seeing the the steady progress, but I'm like the amount of guests I've been getting. I should be on like 200k. You know what I'm saying? But it's the level of like I see so much of progress every single day, but sometimes we always have the end goal in mind. And when I was like listen to the conversation you're having, I'm like, you know what? I'm I'm a hypocrite as well cuz I I'm going through that where it's like

42:22 why is it not that? Like I like you guys seen my schedule. You see I sleep four, five hours a day. I I I'm like I've done like five different states in the last 5 months. Like I'm I'm so passionate what I do and sometimes I feel like the effort you put in is not necessarily reflecting the current result that you have but not yet the end result which segus into like the fitness journey.

42:43 Yeah. How can you convince those people or like the clients you end up like taking on board when they want to just go to the gym for a week and look as sexy as you guys?

42:59 Oh, I'll take that compliment. Part of it, dude, part of a fitness journey is learning to take compliments or like just like when you've built confidence finally like and you didn't have confidence in yourself is building the confidence like being able to take compliments.

43:16 Um, but I think it it's so apparent like I said like that 30-day push. It's we see it with so many clients and then just people that we we we talk to that have like just started their fitness journey again. It's after that 30-day hit usually or just a little bit longer where someone will lose momentum or that maybe maybe they plateau and they have to um go a little bit less in calories or move a little bit more, increase their steps or something. um they they could let that plateau be a sign that oh my gosh, I'm right back to where I started or like like I've really I'm really just the same man struggling with the same things. Like if we me and Jake don't step back and help them uncover that and be like, "Hey,

44:11 this is the science of it." Like losing weight, especially if you're coming from like, "Hey, I got to lose 100 lb. This is a journey. This is not this is not some get-rich quick scheme or like get fit quick scheme online that everyone is promoting. This is like hey I'm changing who I am. I'm building a lifestyle. So it it's vital for me and Jake after those first couple weeks because when you're doing the right things and you're being aware of your calories, weight starts to drop pretty quickly that like that that first couple weeks. But it's when they hit plateaus or when they when they've been they need to maybe take their calories a little bit like a little bit less is like that's when we need to coach them the most on like hey change your perspective on this because this is what a weight loss journey looks like.

45:02 Yeah. It's helping them uh uncover those beliefs that they run into every time that challenge that challenge ends. um every time they fail on their diet, every time they slip up is helping them see that this is what it takes. This is what it takes for you to actually become a different person or create a create a new lifestyle. It's going to take those slip ups. It's going to take those times where you are like, where the heck are my results? but uncovering that shame, those beliefs that keep holding you back. Um, and get them to unconditionally commit to a new person.

45:44 Um, and tackling those beliefs is where it starts. Awesome. And obviously with like the use of technology, I mean when I was in Idaho, you can measure calories, you can do the workouts, there's videos, like it's it's it's easily um uh given as a blueprint to make it as simple as possible where they literally they just get into the gym and follow like the program that has been designed by you guys over years as well to try and like help get people in that right trajectory. And I think that's the most important thing is trajectory. You know, it's hard like like I said, I'm not perfect at that. I And it's not that I want like results right now. I just know how much I put in in everything I do

46:31 that it's like it doesn't reflect it some, you know, and so but when when you see the end goal like this morning when I I couldn't even lift my hand and shower, that's when I know you guys did a good job like what's going on? on my bicep is

46:48 so that's a great workout. No, no, I love that so much. So, for the viewers out there, if somebody wants to get in touch of you, um what can they expect from the program? Like what's the first thing that you guys go into and like is it group call, is it workout, like is it different stuff? Can you guys kind of break down a few of the programs you guys have?

47:09 Yeah. Yeah. when we first when someone first enrolls in the lean and confident program, um the key I think what we've learned as coaches um these past couple years being in business and helping people is to get those um individuals winning as fast as possible and feel and celebrate the small wins. And I think that's so important in someone's fitness journey is to show them like, hey, when you do the sciencebased stuff and you stop um focusing on being perfect and showing these clients and individuals that are getting enrolled that hey, you're going to slip up. You're going to you're going to make mistakes because we're human.

47:52 Just like anyone in business, they're going to slip up. They're going to make mistakes. Any relationship, you're going to make mistakes. getting them to understand that and it's not about perfection. It really helps the individual learn and celebrate small wins and they they feel like a winner along their journey. I think that's so important in the first couple weeks.

48:13 I love that. um with with their first couple weeks um you know KG where like our whole brand is lean and confident but it's overcoming overeating because of Joe and I's journey um and being able to help others find the right tools.

48:33 So not only helping them see the small wins to those first couple weeks but to lead them through a process that starts to drop their shame. Mhm.

48:44 gets them to to unconditionally commit to um the process that just like Joe said is not being perfect at this, but um identifying those those limiting beliefs that are building up shame behind your overeating habits um or even your workout habits is um walking walking them through that process. and we we have coaching calls with them every week and then like there's our group call on Thursday helps connect others. Um but then actually having a structure for them that's personalized and we work through this with them like weekly as they check in with us. Um, but building their lifestyle is the most important.

49:31 So they're not relying rellyant on anyone else or anything else but themselves to

49:39 to build those tools. So we have the nutrition structure that's that gets them aware of their calories and protein. Um, we also have a workout structure that gets them to build the muscle they want. Um, and we help them keep accountable.

49:55 Love that. Love that. As we approach like the the conclusion, I want to just ask probably two more questions. Yeah.

50:02 What would the purpose and mission be of what you guys are trying to do right now with Lean and Confidence? What's the purpose and mission?

50:10 I think the biggest purpose that we have right now um especially tying in physical health and mental health and working people with the Lena a confident program is um to help people drop shame. Mhm.

50:25 How people drop shame with um overeating so they build a healthy lifestyle and they finally find more consistency. And then I think um shame ties so much into mental health. And so helping them drop shame with the personal things maybe past mistakes

50:47 um and helping them really feel like they matter. M I think that's a huge part of what we do.

50:56 Love that. Um cuz that's our focus in our in our business. I I would add to help each individual live their life to the fullest. Just like Joe said, it's about physical and mental health. So getting them to believe in themselves more or more than they do right now

51:14 to live a better life. Um because it's possible for each and everyone. um whether that's getting them to laugh more, more results um in their physical health, bettering their mental health, of course, finding light in their life, finally connecting with others. I think that goes into it, but living their life to the fullest.

51:37 Love that. Love that so much. I often ask people this question as we conclude um because it's the code to winning.

51:44 Yeah. Um and you know insights you need today to seize the world tomorrow from your opinion from the both of you. What is the definition or how would you define winning? I think maybe our definition of winning has changed throughout life and I think a lot of people their definition of winning changes throughout life and I think winning to us means focusing on the things that matter most in life um connection making an impact in people's lives showing people that they matter and approaching life with more love and belief. M I think that's winning for me right now.

52:31 Uh I would agree with Joe is focusing on the things that matter and letting go of the rest is is the answer. But just to switch it up a little bit um is winning is being able to live the life you want and going after the dreams you want. Um, and letting go of the rest. I would just put that in there is like living the life that you want and dreaming big as well, but then letting go of the things that you can't control.

53:06 Mhm. That's funny. Powerful. If you could let our viewers know um where they could get a hold of you, your Instagram handle, um the program, the website, which will all be in the description section. Can you let them like let them know, please?

53:21 Yeah. You're going to find me and Jake um J Duo Fit. We're the dynamic duo, the twins. Um on Instagram, Tik Tok um and then just find us there and then DM us through Instagram and we could get you hooked up with lean the leaning confident program if that's something that um you'd be interested in and you feel like this is the next step for you. Um yeah. Yeah, Facebook's also JS Sharp Joe Sharp. It's another social that we have. Um, but yeah, that's where they find us.

53:59 Awesome. Um, yeah, the coach winning insights you need today to seize the world tomorrow. Uh, JD, fit the sharp brothers. Thank you very much, brothers. Thank you. Awesome. It's

54:11 awesome.

Questions about this episode

Who speaks in "LET’S TALK MENTAL HEALTH: WHY SHAME IS THE REAL ENEMY || JAKE AND JOE SHARP || EPISODE 061"?

KG (Ky) (Host), Joe Sharp (Guest), Jake Sharp (Guest), Sam Sharp (Guest).

What is "LET’S TALK MENTAL HEALTH: WHY SHAME IS THE REAL ENEMY || JAKE AND JOE SHARP || EPISODE 061" about?

The content discusses the impact of shame on mental health, emphasizing the importance of open communication and support in overcoming personal challenges. Jake and Joe Sharp share their experiences with loss and their mission to help men achieve confidence and wellness through a science-based, shame-free fitness program that encourages individuals to embrace their own unique lifestyles.

What is mentioned in this Code To Winning episode?

50 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including Lifestyle, Overeating, Bodybuilder, Calories, Lean and Confident program, Fear-mongering. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "LET’S TALK MENTAL HEALTH: WHY SHAME IS THE REAL ENEMY || JAKE AND JOE SHARP || EPISODE 061"?

The episode runs 54 min; the transcript is about 8,765 words in 116 timestamped sections.

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