John Mayer LIVE | SmartLess

What is discussed, and when

1. 0:00 – 10:00: Ashley, SmartLess, Avalon Theater, Bob Bennett
2. 10:00 – 20:00: Bucket List, The Bucket List, Spotify, Bring on the Night
3. 20:00 – 30:00: Mobile, SmartLess, SmartLess Mobile, Bradley Cooper
4. 30:00 – 40:00: Ashley, Four Others, Mobile, Bob Saget
5. 40:00 – 50:00: Atlanta, Berkeley College of Music, Mobile, Avalon Theater
6. 50:00 – 1:00:00: Dr. Vampire MD, Sleep Hygiene, Vulnerability
7. 1:00:00 – 1:10:00: Grateful Dead, All We Ever Do Is Say Goodbye, Battle Studies, Bob Weir
8. 1:10:00 – 1:18:14: All We Ever Do Is Say Goodbye, No Such Thing, Bob Bennett, Gravity

Notable quotes from "John Mayer LIVE | SmartLess"

• This episode of Smartless and our live show was made possible by Ashley, the brand that is supporting real change where it is needed most. Did you know that more than 7 million children are.

  about SmartLess · at 0:00

• This episode of Smartless is brought to you in part by Skinny Pop Popcorn. We had snacks at the live show thanks to Skinny Pop Original and which I if you haven't had it, it's deliciously popped.

  about Skinny Pop Popcorn · at 1:27

• This special episode of Smartless was recorded live at the Avalon Theater thanks to our friends at Starbucks. And really, what's better than a cold beverage during a live show? We're talking about the ultimate summer sips.

  about Avalon Theater · at 2:44

• You don't need to eat while we're doing this. So Rob Bennett and Michael, the people that make this show, they made this for me because Chinchin went out of business.

  about Bob Bennett · at 5:26

• That is the bucket list premiere.

  about Bucket List · at 17:26

• Sound like a very high idea, but it worked. It was cuz I was tired of having Spotify. like Spotify was always to me like who Pandora. Yay.

  about Spotify · at 19:18

• So, you're from Connecticut and I remember I was in Atlanta once. JB and I spent a couple years there, not together. And I was listening to a radio station driving to work and then you were talking to the people and you.

  about Atlanta · at 40:50

• You know you've written like so many songs there. I by the way I love what is it called? All we ever do is say goodbye.

  about All We Ever Do Is Say Goodbye · at 1:03:20

Who and what is mentioned in this episode?

People

• Bob Bennett — Person · 2 mentions · first at 5:27
• George Benson — Person · 1 mention · first at 19:45
  And I remember Spotify be Oh, you like George Benson, don't you? And I was I told you I wanted to hear Bring on the Night one time. right?
• Mark Willie — Person · 1 mention · first at 27:39
  So, Willie, you just did some time at the Comedy Seller. Will's got a film coming out where he's going to play a stand up and he went up there and threw himself into the deep end.
• Bradley Cooper — Person · 1 mention · first at 27:46
  Yes. Bradley Cooper directed it.
• Bob Saget — Person · 1 mention · first at 30:10
  I'll have you know was the dearly departed Bob Saget. How bad do you feel now?
• Bob Weir — Person · 1 mention · first at 1:01:18
  Music of Grateful Dead. Like falling in love. If I hadn't joined the band or met Bob Weir and Mickey Hart and Bill Croitzman, I would have just fallen into that anyway. And…
• Mickey Hart — Person · 1 mention · first at 1:01:18
  Music of Grateful Dead. Like falling in love. If I hadn't joined the band or met Bob Weir and Mickey Hart and Bill Croitzman, I would have just fallen into that anyway. And…
• Steve Jordan — Person · 1 mention · first at 1:09:56
  And luckily, I'd put people in the band I' probably already played with. I put Steve Jordan on the drums, put Pino on the bass.
• Michael Grant Terry — Person · 1 mention · first at 1:18:03
  Smartless is 100% organic and artisally handcrafted by Rob Armjarf, Bennett Barbco, and Michael Grant Terry.
• Akira the Don — Person · 1 mention
• Amy Poehler — Person · 1 mention
• Bill Kreutzmann — Person · 1 mention
• Don Was — Person · 1 mention
• J. J. Maple — Person · 1 mention
• Jason Bateman — Person · 1 mention
• Jeffrey Tambor — Person · 1 mention
• Oscar Levant — Person · 1 mention
• Pino Palladino — Person · 1 mention
• Ricky — Person · 1 mention
• Sean Hayes — Person · 1 mention
• Will Arnett — Person · 1 mention

Books & papers

• All We Ever Do Is Say Goodbye — Book · 6 mentions · first at 1:03:25
• The Bucket List — Book · 3 mentions · first at 17:26
  That is the bucket list premiere.
• No Such Thing — Book · 2 mentions · first at 1:10:57
  I want to run through the halls of my high school. I want to scream at the top of my kids. I just found out there's no such thing as the real world, just a lie. You got to rise…
• The Crying Game — Book · 1 mention · first at 18:07
  Written for that movie and I believe it's one of those things that's a little bit like the crying game. People will reference the title, right?
• Bring on the Night — Book · 1 mention · first at 19:48
  You like George Benson, don't you? And I was I told you I wanted to hear Bring on the Night one time. right?
• Back to the Future — Book · 1 mention · first at 44:29
  Old were you when you actually picked up a guitar? And what made And was it really Back to the Future? You're I want to be Marty McFly.
• Battle Studies — Book · 1 mention · first at 1:03:31
  That's on that's on Battle Studies.
• Perfectly Lonely — Book · 1 mention · first at 1:08:00
  The good questions will get the right answers cuz I can't I Yeah, I had a song called Perfectly Lonely. And at the end of the bridge, it was like something about have to thank…
• Heartbreak Warfare — Book · 1 mention · first at 1:08:38
• Gravity — Book · 1 mention · first at 1:11:11
  See, gravity would be nice, too.
• Slow Dancing in a Burning Room — Book · 1 mention · first at 1:13:27
  Slow dancing in a burning room. And now Sean, in other words, I guess what I was trying to say with this song was all we ever do is say goodbye.
• Eats, Shoots & Leaves — Book · 1 mention

Companies & orgs

• Ashley — Company · 9 mentions · first at 0:03
  This episode of Smartless and our live show was made possible by Ashley, the brand that is supporting real change where it is needed most. Did you know that more than 7 million children are affected by the welfare system and over.
• Mobile — Company · 6 mentions · first at 20:19
• Four Others — Company · 4 mentions · first at 0:26
  Shocked. That's why we partnered with Ashley and SiriusXM to make a donation to Four Others, an organization working to end the child welfare crisis in America. And I got to…
• Spotify — Company · 2 mentions · first at 19:22
• Berkeley College of Music — Company · 2 mentions · first at 41:16
  Yeah. I went down to Atlanta, moved away. I left Berkeley College of Music after a year, moved down there with a friend and just started writing songs and lugging away and going for it. I had a friend who was.
• Grateful Dead — Company · 2 mentions · first at 1:00:49
  Yeah. I'll make sure you didn't say Grateful Dead cuz I feel bad.
• Chin Chin — Company · 1 mention · first at 6:03
  One of the things I love that you guys So, who you guys know about Chin and Sean's right affinity for Chinch. You guys know about that.
• Sirius XM — Company · 1 mention · first at 18:40
  I'm kidding. So, wait. So, Sirius Brother to Sirius XM brother.
• The War on Drugs — Company · 1 mention · first at 20:04
  Is just hear something while you're working out and you go, I don't know, just give me the war on drugs. Give me war on drugs and then you get the same first song and the same…
• People Magazine — Company · 1 mention · first at 26:33
  Beautiful Estie who books the comedy seller in New York would get calls from People magazine the next night saying, Did he go up? I heard you said this and then that. And if…
• Instagram — Company · 1 mention · first at 34:32
  Here's one that's just a real when I'm looking at an Instagram caption and someone says they were honored to be a part of something, but a part is one word apart, which is the exact opposite of what they're saying.
• Samsung — Company · 1 mention · first at 36:27
  Yeah. No, listen. I would love to have a Samsung phone. That sounds very exciting.
• T-Mobile — Company · 1 mention · first at 36:46
  It's 5G and you're on the T-Mobile network. Anyway, John.
• Dead & Company — Company · 1 mention · first at 1:00:47
  Musicianship. so when you joined when you joined dead company.
• FDA — Company · 1 mention
• The Hershey Company — Company · 1 mention

Products & tech

• SmartLess — Product · 9 mentions · first at 0:00
• SmartLess Mobile — Product · 3 mentions · first at 20:19
• Skinny Pop Popcorn — Product · 2 mentions · first at 1:29
• Pandora — Product · 1 mention · first at 19:26
  But it worked. It was cuz I was tired of having Spotify. like Spotify was always to me like who Pandora. Yay.
• Tricoxan — Product · 1 mention · first at 24:16
  Just approved a medication for lesbians with depression. It's called Tricoxan.
• Cranberries — Product · 1 mention · first at 27:21
  I never really did I did this thing where I would just smash cranberries with a big mallet at the end.
• CPAP — Product · 1 mention
• Flecainide — Product · 1 mention
• Metoprolol — Product · 1 mention

Concepts & topics

• Bucket List — Concept · 3 mentions · first at 17:26
• Vulnerability — Concept · 2 mentions · first at 58:18
  Vulnerability is the [ __ ] Leave yourself so vulnerable that you could die if someone said the wrong thing to you and just die a thousand times and drive.
• Grammar — Concept · 1 mention · first at 32:19
  Thing going. So I hear things when people are talking to me. I know what's wrong with all of the grammar they're using and I just let it go. Now, does it drive you crazy? Does it still drive you crazy a little bit?
• Dr. Vampire MD — Concept · 1 mention · first at 50:18
  I hit it out of the park with the name just Dr. Vampire MD and like just come out with it. And I think if you're driving down Sunset to go back to wherever you guys are, on the west side and you see a lit.
• Sleep Hygiene — Concept · 1 mention · first at 57:15
  And now like [ __ ] being well behaved is the hottest in the world like good sleep hygiene table manners.
• Musicianship — Concept · 1 mention · first at 1:00:42
  Are you in a qu because I want to ask you about your musician musicianship. so when you joined when you joined dead company.
• Atrial Fibrillation (AFib) — Concept · 1 mention
• Podcast Sponsorship — Concept · 1 mention
• Songwriting — Concept · 1 mention
• Texting Etiquette — Concept · 1 mention
• UTI — Concept · 1 mention

Places & events

• Avalon Theater — Place · 2 mentions · first at 2:45
• Atlanta — Place · 2 mentions · first at 40:52
• Los Angeles — Place · 1 mention · first at 4:03
• Fairfield, Connecticut — Place · 1 mention · first at 31:31
  Logic. I like you can use it. John, you grew up You grew up in Fairfield, Connecticut.
• Snellville, Georgia — Place · 1 mention · first at 41:25
  Started writing songs and lugging away and going for it. I had a friend who was from there down in Snellville, Georgia where everyone is someone is what they say down there and which is really nice now when you look at it that way.
• Comedy Cellar — Place · 1 mention

Sponsors

• Podcast Sponsor: Ashley — Sponsor · 1 mention
• Podcast Sponsor: Skinny Pop Popcorn — Sponsor · 1 mention
• Podcast Sponsor: Smartless Mobile — Sponsor · 1 mention
• Podcast Sponsor: Starbucks — Sponsor · 1 mention

Full transcript with timestamps

0:00 This episode of Smartless and our live show was made possible by Ashley, the brand that is supporting real change where it is needed most. Did you know that more than 7 million children are affected by the welfare system and over 368,000 are currently in foster care? So, when we heard those numbers, we were shocked. That's why we partnered with Ashley and SiriusXM to make a donation to Four Others, an organization working to end the child welfare crisis in America. And I got to tell you, it feels really good to be working with a brand that is making a positive impact. Not only are they generous over at Ashley, they also hooked us up with some incredibly comfy furniture, which is nice as well. Uh, and they provided a lot of furniture for our onstage live show. That was also very great because we figured sitting on the floor would have looked very awkward uh and been very uncomfortable. It was actually like

0:59 podcasting in a living room, but just nicer than mine. I'm not saying that I fell asleep mid show, but uh I might have. You know, listening to Shawn and you know Jason and being on an Ashley couch, boy, that'll put you out. Anyway, Ashley offers timeless, well-crafted furniture with white glove delivery right to your door. Visit your local Ashley store or head to ashley.com to find your style. This episode of Smartless is brought to you in part by Skinny Pop Popcorn. We had snacks at the live show um thanks to Skinny Pop Original and which I if you haven't had it, it's deliciously popped.

1:40 It's it's it's perfectly salted. And somehow it's always the first thing gone in the green room. And when I say somehow, I mean Sean and Jason because as soon as we got there, we had this green room that had all this Skinny Bop because like I mentioned, Skinny Bob is one of the sponsors. Those guys, you would have thought that they'd never tried it before or that they hadn't eaten in years because they just started, they literally, it was embarrassing. And them talking to the Skinny Pop people and Sean going like, "We really love Skinny Pop." were like, "Yeah, they know, man. They know."

2:12 Anyway, it was it was awesome to have them as one of our sponsors. And then I gave those guys so much crap about eating all the Skinny Pop. And then when I was on stage during the show, I ended up opening a bag and eating it myself. So, you know, it's a lot of glass houses on this show. It's a recurring theme. And it's one of those snacks where you eat it and you're like, "Yeah, I get why it's popular. It's just really good." So, Skiddy Pop. It's deliciously popped, perfectly salted, popular for a reason. Learn more at hersheyland.com/skinnypop.

2:44 This special episode of Smartless was recorded live at the Avalon Theater thanks to our friends at Starbucks. And really, what's better than a cold beverage during a live show? We're talking about the ultimate summer sips from Starbucks. Whether it's the unofficial drink of the summer, the summer berry refresher, or the new Strato Frappuccino blended beverage, these beverages are handcrafted to help savor the season. When I was doing the show, I had an iced chai latte. The iced chai lattes at Starbucks are the best. I love them. I drink them like in one gulp. They're so delicious. Your summer favorites are ready at Starbucks.

3:30 Good evening and welcome to Smartless Live. Are you ready to get going? Oh god. I don't I don't know. I don't know if I want guy. How is this guy still talking? You have to do

3:44 Please welcome the guys from Smartless. Hey, hey, smart. Hello, Los Angeles. Hi.

4:09 I think we should uh start with a little crowd work. You sure? Sure. We've never done a little crowd work.

4:15 Fell right off the stage. Uh last time I was here, uh I was right about where you were, sir. Um with Belly Full of Booze watching Smash Company play up here.

4:24 Oh, yeah. That was about 25 years ago when it was the palace. Anybody? And it was And it was just booze, right?

4:33 Just the booze. Yeah. The last time I was here was for some gay [ __ ] No. Well, happy bride.

4:45 And also happy bride. Yeah. Listen. Um, so look at this nice Ashley furniture. I mean, unbelievable.

4:53 Wow. It makes me want to go right to sleep. How many microphones do we get? I don't know. I don't know, guys. I'm so thirsty. I need a little pickme up.

5:02 Yeah. I wonder if me too. Oh. Oh, it's empty. There we go. What if I What if they were all empty? I was just like, "Yep."

5:11 And I guess if you're hungry, just Sure. Um Sean, what's the prop? So, this is this was So, our the people that really make us look good are Rob.

5:22 That's not your personal. It's what? No, it's not my personal. You don't need to eat while we're doing this. So Rob Bennett and Michael, the people that make this show, they made this for me because Chinchin went out of business. And you know, I love Chinchin as much sodium as I can get. And uh so they just gave it to me backstage and I walked out with it and I opened it.

5:43 Uhoh. This is true. They just gave it to me as a gift. And guess what's inside? Oh, I want one of those cookies.

5:50 Wait, I want Yeah. Isn't it when you pick a fortune cookie, you got to pick the cookie that's smiling at you, right?

5:59 You know, one of the things uh I love that you guys So, who you guys know about Chin Chin and Sean's uh right affinity for Chinch. You guys know about that.

6:08 You guys are You guys listen to the show uh from time to time. You're familiar with some of the characters in the show.

6:16 Do you guys you guys familiar with him? We talk about our friend Dan De's. You hear about Dan?

6:20 Oh, boy. Dan, stick your hand up. Come on, Dan. There he is. Guys, I didn't know you were here. Dawn.

6:27 We got Don right next to Josh right now. Josh is here somewhere. Josh, where are you at? He's maybe on the side.

6:34 Yeah, there he is. And where's my dad? Where's Josh? Where's my dad? Is my dad here?

6:39 Oh, yeah. Oh, it's just that's just a block away on the 101. No, he's sharing his location. He's sharing his location with me right now.

6:48 This says, "Size the opportunities that will define your future's course." A what? What does that mean?

6:55 Anyway, I have an opening story. I think it means do something. Do you have an opening story?

6:59 I do. It's really You worked on some bits. I did. I worked on Well, that was the first bit that just was right. All right. So, listen.

7:06 All right. So, this is this is I don't know if you guys are going to give a [ __ ] but uh a couple days ago.

7:10 By the way, thank you for coming, you guys. I We're We're always amazed that you guys uh listen to us talk about nothing. Um, but I guess the part that makes it understandable is that you're you're doing something that is sort of brainless and it's like, well, why not augment it with something that's bra like, you know, you're jogging or whatever the hell is you're riding a, you know, a subway or whatever.

7:36 But here, you've left your house. I just spit fortune cookie on the mic. Um, you've left the house. Um, and and you're out, which is new for you for us to which is a big deal. Um, and we're sitting on stage and just talking and and so thank you for for doing that because there's no music, you know, and so thank you. Thank you.

7:54 Yeah, appreciate it. There's music in Well, there is a piano. So, you guys are in luck, I think,

8:00 on the stage. That might be for the the Is that Is that for the mystery guest? It might be for me.

8:05 It might be for you. Sean does play. We might get a Are we going to get a visit from Oscar Levette?

8:12 Can he Can he visit with us? By the way, you you guys should be so lucky. You truly we've talked about it before. He's a classically trained pianist and like see this guy.

8:24 You better get on there just a little bit today. If you want to be put to sleep, I'll run over there and play.

8:29 All right. So, cuz it's like it's your story. Yeah. I can't People aren't like I can't wait for classical music. Um so, so Scotty and I are unloading the dishwasher. this a couple days ago and we're putting the things away and we put the tongs in the drawer the back the opposite way. Have you anybody ever done that?

8:48 Sounds incredible. So, keep going. God, you can't top the story. You know how much traffic they had to drive through to get here?

8:59 In Hollywood on a Thursday night. Okay. You need Sorry. So, the tongs. So, you're putting the tongs in the dishwasher? Yeah, we put the tongs in the dishwasher.

9:11 This is incredible. And we couldn't open the door. What? No way. Hang on. I need another sip for my Starbucks.

9:20 Then what? Sean. So, so he couldn't open the door. We couldn't open the door. And

9:26 wait, he's checking his cards to keep himself a long line. No, no, no. I'm thinking I'm thinking. So, we put the thing and then we couldn't open. We're like jingling. So then I said, "Scotty, get the hot poker from the fireplace, right? Because it's really long." And the drawer would only open that wide, so we couldn't put our hand in there. So we got the a hot poker in there. And for 2 hours, he's trying to get the tongs out. Look. And this is when I have a picture of Scotty after the tongs. You have pictures. This is

9:57 That's Scotty. And he couldn't get the thing. So then I was like I was like, "Wait, I'll I'll get a wire hanger." So then I got a wire hanger. I took out the we took out the second door drawer and I put the wire hanger underneath and I'm inside the thing and I couldn't get it out for like two hours. I'm almost done. I'm almost done. And then and so like I

10:16 hope this pays off. You need staff. So then we had we had to hire a handyman because we just couldn't do it. And so then no, no, wait. I'm almost done. And um and then he comes over and he goes, "Oh, this happens all the time." Which made me feel really good. And then he says, "By any chance, do you have a wire hanger?" And I was like, "Yeah, but good luck. It doesn't work." 10 seconds. He just got it out. That's the end of the story.

10:37 Wow. So, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Honestly. Honestly, don't applaud that. Our deepest apologies.

10:44 You'll get more. Our deepest. And you give me [ __ ] for long-winded questions. You have a long-winded story that at least mine ends with a question mark.

10:52 I brought a picture. But that picture wasn't I mean, I wanted to see a picture of you jackasses with the poker over. That would have been good to see that.

11:00 Yeah. That like a video of that. Yeah. or a video or something and it was just a picture of Scotty with dirty hands.

11:06 Yeah, cuz of the poker from the fireplace. Did you run this by anybody? No, I did.

11:11 You should. Yeah. Okay. You should have. Scotty up there giggling like the story worked.

11:16 There's Scotty. Didn't it didn't, Scotty. Scotty, is that how it happened? Um, hey, what's next on the cards?

11:26 Um, should we I have another story or I could intro the No, I want to hear the other story. Don't you guys want to hear another?

11:31 Yes. It's really This is much faster. So Scotty and I have I already told you guys.

11:37 Why am I all the way over here? Oh, come over here. Bring the the [ __ ] thing.

11:41 This thing's all wired. That's what's on it. So Scotty and I uh both snore and we have like uh we sleep in separate rooms because otherwise we wouldn't sleep because like every 5 seconds. And we had we went through the whole sleep program and we got CPAPs, you know, the thing, the CPAP machine. And so it goes,

11:58 let's not drift over. Two big big stories right there. Separate bedrooms. Okay. That's not something we all do.

12:07 Well, you should. You should. You sleep better. And uh oxygen tanks. Yes. While they sleep.

12:13 Well, a cap. So, you know, it's hooked here and it pushes down. Well, we get it. We've seen it.

12:17 Okay. And it goes over your head and it's not very attractive. So anyway, so I'm lying there in bed and I turn the machine on and once it's on, it's hard to get, but you can't really open your mouth to speak because the air is pushing. Anyway, so he's stepping over my back

12:28 getting a heart on and he got God, how do you guys keep it alive? I mean, this is we're this is technically now not show business, right?

12:38 What we're doing is not therapy. It's not Do you want to come down and cry a little bit? So anyway, so he's standing over me and he's just saying good night and I said he said he's like, "All right, you good?" And I'm like, "Yeah, I'm like I'm just nod cuz I can't talk." And he goes he goes, "Okay, good night. I love you." And I go, "I love you, too." Oh god.

12:59 Come on. I told you that. No children, right? What? No what? No children. No children. No children. A dog.

13:07 A dog named Ricky. All right, let's get to our guest. Ready? Do you want to add something?

13:15 I mean, do you want to add something? No, I just I just love just your dayto-day.

13:21 It's incredible. There's such a whole wide world out there. And uh Anyway Anyway, next time you come over, I'll show you.

13:28 I do want to come over and see that. So, my guest today, our guest today, it's your guest. I won't claim the guest yet.

13:35 Yeah. writes the kind of songs, okay, that make you want to text your wife or husband or ex or mistress or hookup or best friend

13:44 or CPAP partner. There are also songs that you'll love and never forget for the rest of your life. He once tried standup comedy, collects rare watches like it's a competitive sport and swish and swears he's not as intense as he looks mid guitar solo. He's the reason you bought a guitar or learned how to play the piano. and he's someone I'm proud to call our serious XM brother. Please welcome one of the most absurdly talented, relentlessly curious, deeply thoughtful, and consistently brilliant artist of all time, John Mayer.

14:22 Good to see you, man. How are you? This is fantastic. Yeah, that's what you What do you got on tonight?

14:38 AP. What's AP? Autumn Rarp. Oh, you got a you got a nice I'm going to show you for my 50th birthday.

14:44 Yeah. There's an email going. Welcome to the show. First of all, John Mayer. John. Thank you.

14:50 Thank you for having me. And thank you. And it should be noted that we've wanted to have you on the show for a long time, which is going to get go into Jason's story. And I know where you're going to start. Go ahead.

14:59 Well, yeah. you know, the the the the mystery guest thing is a real thing. Unless it's, you know, like a president or something and we got to like be together and know stuff. Um, no offense.

15:10 No, that that sounded shitty. No, it's fine. So, there's an email that goes out the other day about about about this. Um, and it it says somewhere in the email uh something about John Mayer.

15:23 And so, I'm like I'm already here, by the way. She started clapping, but I already am here. It's a It's like a with our whole group of us and it's like an admin thing about these are the things and then with John Mayer the guest and photo or something,

15:36 you know. I mean I I like I like a little snark. So I I email back and go, "Huh, John Mayer sounds like a great guest. Hope we can get him on the show someday."

15:44 He doesn't reply all. Right. Right. Meaning like somebody screwed up and put John Mayer on this email. Now I know who the guest is.

15:51 So then and then I answer. Go ahead and finish, Will. Well, hang on. No, do the punch line. You guys do it. You guys. Yeah,

15:59 do it. What else happened? Well, the the part that you're forgetting is that and then I say, "Yeah, John Mayer would be great cuz I realize that they've tipped that it's John Mayer,

16:08 right?" And then doesn't really realize that they've tipped it. You didn't know that it was

16:16 I figured it was for a later episode. God. But you're This is what I'm getting at.

16:20 But this genius Oh. Oh, I hope one day we can get him. That's a great idea. That didn't help. My wife for the last six or seven days says, you know, I was like, "Well, what should I wear?" "Oh, don't worry. Wear something funky cuz she's really funky." And and she goes, "Oh."

16:33 I said, "What?" You know, telling me the sex of the guest doesn't really give away the So, it's it's a female. Huh? I go, she goes, "Yeah, I'm sorry." I said, "Baby, don't worry about it." So, for five, six days, it's she she she of course here comes John and she's giggling up there.

16:48 Great work. Great work. It said in the email that it was John Mayor man but not for this one. I don't think it was for this. Of course it did. It said what we're doing tonight.

16:56 Oh, I am a skimmer. I must say skim. John, welcome to the show. Thank you for having me on the show.

17:01 Great to be here, John. Great to be here. Yeah. Do you have Do you um do you own a pair of tongs? I'm kidding. So, uh

17:09 Yes. Do you remember the first time you and I met? We have met. I think the only place we meet or at a certain somebody's Christmas parties.

17:18 Okay. But we met before then. And we have a picture of me and you meeting. Uh-oh. I want more picture aids. All right, let me let me try to figure out where this is.

17:26 That is the bucket list premiere. The bucket list premiere which you wrote say what you want to say

17:32 for this for the movie. And did you know I'm glad you remember the irony being that it was not on your bucket list to go to that.

17:41 So I So you wrote the song Say What You Want to Say, which was a massive hit. I love that song so much. And um but I don't know that people know this is just sidebar the bucket list the term the bucket list was invented by the writer of the movie the bucket list. Yes. Yeah. So people believe that that has been around for decades and it really was written for that movie and I believe it's one of those things that's a little bit like the crying game. People will reference the title,

18:10 right? And and I think that the name of, if I may, we both were involved me tangentally.

18:15 That's one of those films where the title of the film has gone on to live on a little more than the film itself.

18:20 Yeah. Isn't that wild? Wait, come on. The the term the bucket list did not exist before that film.

18:26 It's in the email. This is This is why you get some big bucks. Yeah. That was a great night though. That was a great night at the

18:33 Oh, wasn't that amazing? I'm glad you remember it. Yeah, I do. I'm kidding. So, wait. So, Sirius Brother to Sirius XM brother.

18:42 Yes. You have your own channel. What is it? 14 or channel 14 with John Mayer. Channel 14.

18:47 I don't know if you know it, but wait. What happens on channel 14? What happens? What's going down on channel 14?

18:52 Yeah. What happens? What? Uh, I want So I was very high one night and I had this idea for a radio channel where the music changes throughout the day

19:03 so that wherever you are in the day, you turn it on and there's like a playlist for that hour.

19:07 Yeah. And uh, son of a [ __ ] it worked. Yeah. And uh, wait, so there's so there's there's a playlist that's more appropriate for 2 p.m. as opposed to 10 p.m. All that does sound like a very high idea,

19:20 but it worked. It was cuz I was tired of having Spotify. Uh like Spotify was always to me like who Pandora. Yay.

19:29 But Spotify to me was always like your grandmother. Like your grandmother would learn one thing about you when you were five and continually give you gifts based on that thing for the next 10 years.

19:42 That's right. And I remember uh Spotify be like, "Oh, you like George Benson, don't you?" And I was like, "I told you I wanted to hear Bring on the Night one time." right? Right.

19:51 You know, right? Or give me the night as it's called. And uh and so I was like, what if there was we broke out of the algorithm cuz what ends up happening is you go to the gym and all you want to do is just hear something while you're working out and you go, I don't know, just give me the war on drugs. Give me war on drugs and then you get the same first song and the same second song and the same third song and the same fourth song. And so I really feel like it met a need and I like making stuff that meets a need. I like that. I get a kick out of it.

20:19 Like smartless mobile. Yes. Hey, that's that Sean. Wow. Sean, sorry. Sean, what's smartless mobile?

20:25 Sorry. Sorry. What is smartless mobile? We just launched it two days ago. It's a mobile service that we're doing. Anyway,

20:30 why would somebody want smartless mobile? Because 90% of the time you spend it on your cell phone, you're using Wi-Fi. So, you're overpaying with an unlimited plan where you can save half of your bill.

20:37 I can save money right now by going to smartless mobile. Absolutely. Unbelievable.

20:40 Tell me more. Go to smartmobile.com. Did you really do that? We did. Yeah. Two days ago.

20:45 We're going to switch your phone before you're out of here. All right. Great. Seriously, takes 90 seconds. Wait, here's what I want to know. Can I Can I get in?

20:51 Yeah. Yeah. So, we're up here on stage. This is not comfortable for me. I I'm a shy person. I don't like the spotlight. I don't like having I don't like like being myself and I see all the faces and this is something you're very comfortable with, right? You've been on stage since how old? 22, right? Yeah. And and you're now 62 now. Um, but like the being just hearing your voice on that microphone and I can tell how comfortable you are. Like that's uh I I wish I had that. That's like

21:22 But I wish I had a gig where I was getting nervous to sit on a couch for you know I'm looking at this going this is the greatest gig ever.

21:35 Do you getting you're getting nervous to come out? It's just not super comfy for me. You're a freaking rock star. Looking out at people and singing and strumming. That's like That's your

21:46 Jason. Every one of these people if you needed a place to stay tonight would let you sleep in their guest room.

21:51 That's a great point. Is that what you That's what you tell yourself when you get

21:54 every single one of these Why would you be nervous when every single one of these people would put you up in their house?

22:01 That's a nice window into John's. How can you be nervous? Now, that's what I ended up doing at one And I went, "Every one of these people would let you sleep on the futon if you needed to. So what are you nervous about?" And

22:11 [ __ ] the futon. I bet a lot be like, "Welcome to our marriage." Probably. Have Have any Have you guys ever to get over nerves done the Brady Bunch trick where you just imagine somebody in their underwear?

22:25 No, that doesn't work. Does it? Does it work? Have you guys ever done that? It It kind of works. Really?

22:29 I just imagine myself taking a quarter milligram of Xanax and then I do that. a quarter mill. I manifest.

22:36 Yeah, I just need a little chat. I just need a little chat thing. No, you don't do that.

22:40 Yeah, sure. I mean, every once in a while, all right. I mean, okay. So, this is an unknown thing.

22:45 Okay. It It's a little different. I mean, I'm not high right now. But if if I'm coming out to do my show and there's muscle memory, then I don't get nervous. But if it's the unknown, it can be a little You know what ends up happening a lot of the times? When I'm a surprise, I start getting amped up and nervous because I know I'm a surprise. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, I get nervous every day. I got nervous coming out here.

23:07 Yeah, because it's you. Do you have any pre-show OCDish things you do? Uh, okay. We did um we did uh we did Kimmel the other night and and

23:19 Oh, tell the story about the dishwasher. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's got a great one for you.

23:24 That's a safe one. Um, and sweet, sweet, sweet Sean uh took the seat furthest away from Jimmy because he said, "I I didn't want to I don't want to sit next to you, Jimmy, because I get nervous these I get nervous on talk shows big time."

23:36 Yeah, but if I if I prepare like I did today, I get less nervous. Sure. I'm And you may not even go to those cards if you don't have to.

23:44 No, watch me. Okay. So, um, so so you did standup, which I love. I didn't know you did standup comedy.

23:52 Yes. Yes. I did not know that about you that you did standup comedy one point. This guy was nominated singularly as best host

23:59 for best host. Best host of a podcast. No, by himself. I say that because I did too. Um I actually have a joke that I read on the internet today. It's um the FDA the FDA just approved a medication for lesbians with depression. It's called um Tricoxan.

24:20 It's not bad. It's not bad. Do you have one? Do you have one that you like? I mean,

24:26 the worst. The worst. You read the You read the punch line. I did cuz I was nervous.

24:34 I was nervous that I wouldn't get it right. Wait, wait, wait. I um Maple, my incredible daughter, 13, right up there, told me a great joke today. Uh, knock. Who's there?

24:46 Who? Who? Oh, right. Right. Yeah. Wait. Knock knock. Who's there? You can Jay Jason.

24:56 Are you guys Are you guys starting to get it? This is why he gets a big bucks. He's a I'm worse. Um,

25:02 do it with them. Do it with them. Do it. Oh, hey. Knock knock. Britney Spears. Britney Spears.

25:09 Knock knock. Britney Spears. Britney Spears. Oops. I did it again. Oh god. Johnny I

25:21 do you have like a like a go-to joke that you I didn't do it long enough to have a go-to joke.

25:27 What was your style as a standup? I didn't even I mean I would go I wanted to be observational. I wasn't the the thing is and I'm glad I did stand up because I I I'll do shows with Dave Chappelle now and I'm not the front and center but I understand him. I've seen so much standup. Like I used to go to the comedy seller every single night in New York City. I'd go to the comedy seller and I was just enamored with it. When I was younger, I didn't have this thing in my head that would say, "That's not for you." And so I would look at it and I go, "I'm going to do that, too.

26:00 I'm going to do that, too." And uh and I didn't quite put the time in that it would have taken. I mean,

26:05 what you're supposed to do if you really want to do it, get your tapes. Watch your tapes.

26:10 Yeah. And I didn't want to watch the tapes. I didn't I just I wanted to drink just enough to watch someone do stand up and go, I can do it. And it it I didn't quite And it was it's a different experience once you get up there. I bet it's just like

26:25 I liked it. I actually liked the uphill battle of it. The problem was poor sweet beautiful Estie who books the comedy seller in New York would get calls from People magazine the next night saying, "Did he go up? I heard you said this and then that." And if you think about it, I here's why I can't do standup. Because if I one of the many reasons, if I got on stage and I said, "So my girlfriend has another UTI,

26:51 right? That's ceases to be about a joke about a UTI." And it everyone would go, "Who's the girlfriend? Who's he dating? Who is he?"

26:58 And so it didn't work. Celebrity news. It it didn't work. Even the setup didn't work because people would get stuck in who's who and what's going on. But it taught me stage time. It taught me

27:10 And most of your jokes were about UTI if I remember. They were all UTI pretty much.

27:15 Yes, they were all You never bothered to develop any other material. I never really did uh I did this thing where I would just smash cranberries with a big mallet at the end.

27:24 Yeah. That and then you just taught yourself guitar because they're actually really good for curing UTI.

27:30 Yes. Well, I had thought about that before I said it. That's actually true, right? A lot of you are nodding out there.

27:37 Yeah. Yeah. So, uh, Willie, you just did some time at the Comedy Seller. Will's got a film coming out where he's going to play a stand up and he went up there and threw himself into the deep end.

27:46 Yes. Bradley Cooper directed it. We shot at the Comedy Seller. Sean's in the movie with me as well,

27:52 if you blink. But yeah, and uh, and our friend Bradley directed it and we shot at the Comedy Seller for eight days. I play a guy who's just starting to become a standup. He's because he's going through some life changes. And so, yeah. So I did the same I went called Is this thing on and it comes out later this year.

28:08 Yeah. And it was scary. Yes. Or not scary. Yeah. The first time I went on uh Yeah. But I was going on well in the same way. I was going on as they introduced me as this character as a guy who's going up doing stand up for the first time. Then people were very confused and I'm like hey um you know I'm I'm going through a divorce. I'm getting divorced. And people are like didn't he get divorced like 10 years ago Amy Polar? like what's you know

28:32 and it was very confusing for people. We made the leap anyway. Yeah. But did you see anyone you loved when you were there? Did you get a ton so many good and they're so good and it's so hard what they do. You have so much you end up having so much respect for standups and what they do. It's amazing. And writing jokes all day. So we would go back and we'd write jokes all day and then go at like 9:00 and meet up there and go up three or four times at all the different stages. It was pretty crazy.

28:56 There's really nothing like it. And everyone has a friend that's told them you should do stand up or the other way around.

29:04 And when you get up there, you realize the water is choppy. And and what's crazy is it's true. And what's crazy is as Jason pointed out, you've been performing in front of huge audiences for a long time. And I've been doing this for a long time. I look really young, but I but I'm older than And they're laughing because it's so true. and and and yet when you actually go do standup, it is just such a different thing. And we did one night uh when we were prepping for the movie.

29:36 John, we're going to get to you in a sec. This is great. No, this is great. I was just thinking as I was filming, as he was talking,

29:42 I was thinking to myself, cuz I drifted far. I thought this is actually the most fun I've had on a podcast so far. I like where we're going. I like where we're lucky to get a word out.

29:51 It's just it's a conversation. My point was the line between between uh succeeding killing and and bombing is very thin.

30:00 So the first guy who brought me on stage quickly please. Yeah. I just we we have to get to these guys.

30:08 I'll have you know was the dearly departed Bob Saget. How bad do you feel now? and and Bob brought me on stage which meant he went up for just probably four or five minutes which was impossible for Bob to do to do four or five

30:23 even more impossible now that is true that is that is true Bob Bob would appreciate you as a joke which is why you can do it appreciate it

30:32 which is why you can do it and he brought me up on stage and I immediately felt how difficult it was and this is the real problem this is the real I'm trying to put you in my shoes if If you were to do standup, you might absolutely suck, but all you want to do when you get off stage is do it again.

30:52 Yeah. And again, there's something about it. It's a little kind of million-dollar baby where you're all beat up and you go, "I'll see you tomorrow morning."

31:00 Sean, now Sean tried and you guys have probably heard a little bit if you listen to the podcast, but Sean tried stand up once and he has a he had a great opening. You remember his great opening? Let's hear it, Sean.

31:10 It's not a quite level of tong story, but You're going to love it, John. It's They say doing ballet is one of the most difficult things you could ever do, right?

31:19 So, I say just don't do it. End of joke. That's it. That's That's the kind of logic I like.

31:26 I like that kind of cha tail eating logic. I like you can use it. John, you grew up You grew up in Fairfield, Connecticut.

31:33 Yes, I grew up in Fairfield, Connecticut. Yeah. You grew up in Yeah. Your mom was an English teacher, your dad a high school principal. So what I mean what like did you feel like you had to be on your toes all the time with your grades and learning and all that?

31:46 I had a very nice kind of hybrid of right brain left brain growing up because there would be like if if you if you had a question about a word the dictionary would come out at the dinner table. Oh really?

31:58 And you get you would break down what that word was. But then I would also go in my room and kind of escape from all of it and just play guitar. And if you put both those things together, it's very good

32:10 for being a singer songwriter because you've got the left brain, right brain thing going. So I I hear things when people are talking to me. I know what's wrong with all of the grammar they're using and I just let it go. Now,

32:24 does it drive you crazy? Does it still drive you crazy a little bit? There there's a couple ones that drive me crazy and it's number and amount. Do you know about number and amount?

32:32 No. Tell me. I'm going to change your life forever and you're going to annoy all your friends. It is a number of people. It is an amount of butter. So number refers to a quantifiable substance,

32:45 a bunch of singular things. Yes. And amount is the opposite of that. So when you hear amount of people, it is technically wrong.

32:53 Number of people. Number of people. And when you hear someone say number of people, to me it's like music to my ears.

32:58 What about punctuation with texting, emails, things like that? Periods go inside of the quotes,

33:03 right? You know, exactly. Commas go inside the quotes. Exactly. I believe question marks go outside the quotes. There's a book called Eats, Shoots, and Leaves. You said no, they don't.

33:14 It depends. It depends. If you're if you're relaying what somebody else said, right? Hey,

33:19 then it would go in. If you're asking, did she say this? Then it would go outside,

33:23 right? But then it's not a double dash for the quotes. It's a single dash because it's somebody else's,

33:29 right? If I'm writing, I will actually do several layers of quotes. So, I'll use the single apostrophe for the quotes inside of the double apostrophe for what was said. I think it's beautiful. It's a beautiful thing.

33:42 Yeah. So, well, not all heroes wear capes. Are But are you one of those cool texters that like uses acronyms and like how the kids text? No. You'll write a goddamn sentence, right? And you'll punctuate it. You'll spell check it and then you'll send it. I have one pet peeve.

33:59 Yeah. Which is uh when people use hung for when someone was hanged, it's hanged, not that comes in handy a lot.

34:09 Well, because because he searches it on Google. Do you have that, John? Where you feel like the urge to correct people?

34:14 I will tell you, I have a rule. I have a rule. If I feel like it will help them and they will appreciate that help, I'll do it. And I'll have a way of saying

34:23 there's nothing wrong with you saying it to me. I think you'd want to know and I want you to So you can you can judge it. Here's one that's just a real

34:32 when I'm looking at an Instagram caption and someone says they were honored to be a part of something, but a part is one word apart, which is the exact opposite of what they're saying.

34:43 Right. Right. That one is bonkers. Yeah. Or what about or what about when you're sending a text? The send button is not a period. You know, create your paragraph. Send that. Don't just keep hitting send at the end of every sentence

34:58 cuz then my phone goes I feel like someone died. This has been about a year and a half to two years now where this

35:05 I promise we're going to get back to the show. This became Listen, we're on a hot streak.

35:11 This became a kind of vernacular where people would say I mean not for nothing but we should. And it's cool if you have that text open.

35:21 Yeah. And if you're watching something and it keeps coming down or if he's trying to show a video of people getting hung,

35:28 there aren't alerts. Then you would just see it coming down and stuff. And so now just write it all. I put paragraph breaks in there.

35:35 Take your time. Write it. Get it together and then alert me to what you want. At the same time, it does make it more convers. I'm not I'm not here defending that and it's I'm not guilty of it. But I will say There's also nothing worse. You're the absolute worst. There's nothing worse than getting 6 in of text from somebody.

35:54 Like, oh, [ __ ] it. Here's this story. [ __ ] You know what I mean? You would love my texts.

35:59 I bet. Can you try to texting with you flow? Try me. I'm ready. I'm ready to start a friendship with you. I'm saying it officially right now in front of everybody.

36:08 I I'll never be uninteresting. No. I saw you at the Mets game the other day. I'm like, we can we can go to baseball games. You can teach me how to play guitar. you and I I know this is sort of like the we never hang out, Dave thing you're doing, but I would hang out with you.

36:21 I'll get you a deal on Smartless Mobile. That's great. We'd love to get you on.

36:25 Yeah. No, listen. I would love to have a uh Samsung phone. That sounds very exciting.

36:31 He's kidding. Yeah, he's kidding. I can't wait to have red bubbles. I'm g Why are your bubbles red? I'm on Smartless Mobile.

36:43 Uh it's not true. That's not true. It's all blue. It's 5G and you're on the T-Mobile network. Anyway, John.

36:49 Anyway, John, sounds like mobile. Sounds like you don't want a free [ __ ] phone.

36:54 I just love the idea of being on Hit me up on like you guys have to start integrating it into your casual conversation. You should hit me up on my smartphone.

37:01 We did it. We did have to. We didn't know that Sean was going to drop that to be honest. Uh

37:06 yeah. Well, it's fun. It's fun. And we will be right back. This episode of Smart List is sponsored by our friends at Ashley. The brand actually made our live event stage feel kind of like a home while also supporting incredible organizations like Four Others. Earlier in the episode, we mentioned their donation to For Others, a nonprofit doing very, very, very important work to end the child welfare crisis in America. The crisis may go overlooked at times, but it has serious consequences. And through working with Ashley and for others, we learned that 90% of children in the welfare system will experience severe trauma. And children that age out of the foster care system have a 40% chance of being homeless within 18 months with 97% immediately entering chronic poverty.

37:58 And these stats are hard to hear, but that's exactly why this work is so important. So through Ashley's donation, the next generation can find a loving and secure home, strengthening our communities and opening doors to new possibilities. And uh we're just thrilled to celebrate the powerful work being done by four others with Ashley's support. We were sitting on Ashley pieces during the live taping of our show, which was comfy and they look great and made it look like a living room and kind of at times forgot we were on stage. But sitting on Ashley's Furniture, knowing the work that they do that goes and and does good in the world felt even better. And just being associated with that brand for us went a long way. Ashley's all about style that's made for real life with white glove delivery right to your door. So visit your local Ashley store or head to ashley.com to find your style. To learn

38:53 more about four others mission or to donate, visit for others.com. This episode of Smart List is brought to you in part by Skinny Pop Popcorn. And yes, it's exactly what you heard crunching backstage at our live event at the Avalon. I I will say there's something kind of um really classic about the original Skinny Pop. No fluff, just it's just got the good stuff. It's it's deliciously popped, perfectly salted, light and airy. Kind of like me. I feel like I'm kind of light and airy. I'm like a human skinny pop, but I'm not as good. We did. We had so much Skinny Pop. They were a sponsor of the show and uh we had so much of it everywhere. We were kind of silly with Skinny Pop and the guys went a little bit crazy with it. Every time I I buy Skinny Pop in my mind, I'm always like, "Oh, I'm getting it for the kids."

39:47 Because I have two teenagers and a little guy. And I'm like, "So, I'm I'm getting Skinny Pop for the kids. It's a good snack and it's it's a snack that I sort of feel comfortable having in the house and then invariably I'm the one who eats it all. Skinny Pop. Deliciously popped, perfectly salted, popular for a reason. Find out more at hersheyland.com/skinnyop. You're listening to a very special episode of Smartless recorded at the Avalon Theater and we've partnered with Starbucks to help make this summer even more memorable. This season, Starbucks is delivering handcrafted beverages made to inspire you to enjoy the summer season to the fullest. We're talking bold refreshers, iced beverages, and a new Frappuccino that all tastes like summer with each sip. I've been sipping between takes, and let's just say none of us are sharing. Your summer favorites are ready at Starbucks. Stop by your

40:40 local store and enjoy your favorite tastes of summer. And now, back to the show. So, you're from Connecticut and I remember I was in Atlanta once. JB and I spent a couple years there, not together. And uh I was listening to a radio station driving to work and then you were talking to the people and you knew these people on the radio and I guess I missed the first you had a real connection to Atlanta at the start of your career. Is that true?

41:06 Yeah. I moved down to Atlanta uh when I was when I was not there yet. Go ahead.

41:13 Like like a real connection? Yeah. I went down to Atlanta, moved away. I left Berkeley College of Music after a year,

41:19 moved down there with a friend and just started writing songs and lugging away and going for it. I had a friend who was from there down in Snellville, Georgia where everyone is someone is what they say down there and uh which is really nice now when you look at it that way. Uh and so I moved down there and we started writing songs and I just How old were you?

41:40 21 20 Didn't you start writing in high school? Yeah, I started writing songs. And you were like a gas station person. gas station. I was writing song. I was writing songs in math class. I was

41:50 see that blows my mind that I mean it's so rare to to have that gift at such a young age to be able to use the English language then put it to music and you just happen to be an incredible songwriter and you knew this at such a young age. Did you know why you were pumping gas at the gas station? Did you have enough belief in yourself to know that, oh, this is just temporary. I'm probably going to make it someday.

42:11 Everything. Yeah. I mean, everything that I was looking at was in my way. And there are kids out there who feel this way, and my heart goes out to them. They're not being punks. They're acting out in class, but they're not being punks. They already know. It would be like going to a restaurant and the waiter is reading the specials and you go, "I know what I want. I don't want that. I just want the burger." and they're telling you about we take the lobster out, we cook it, we put it back in the shell, and you're like, I I know what I want. And it's it was very it was that was actually one of the hardest times of my life was to have to be 15.

42:52 Uhhuh. When I knew that I wasn't 15, I wanted to go do this thing and it was really I love the way you put that.

42:58 So then when when did the dam break? When was it like yes, finally I'm getting some traction. They're playing my music or

43:04 Well, I went to Berkeley College of Music when I was 19. And I took a couple years off to hone my chops at the mobile station. But by the way, let me also say, whatever job you have, be the best at it on your way to where you're going. Be the best at I became assistant manager at the mobile station.

43:22 I remember seeing an interview. Did you go there with like 25 years, 30 years ago? I remember that.

43:27 I got a pager. Just be great at whatever job they give you cuz it's more fun to be great than to like suck at it and say you don't want to do it. just ace it for fun,

43:38 you know? And I would go to like mobile management meetings and I remember I'm going to tell a story. It's very similar to your style. I was sitting at a meeting in a convention room with all of these mobile managers and there was a woman who was giving a speech to all the mobile managers and it was called give them the pickle and it was all based on if you're working at a deli and someone comes up and says can I have an extra pickle don't charge them for another pickle give them the pickle right

44:08 that's a cool lesson to learn from pumping gas and makes up for how stupid you are

44:12 that's always been your too right give him the extra pickle Give them the pickle.

44:17 Yep. And if they don't, and if they like it, give them the second one for free.

44:21 So So, uh, how old were you? So, wait, how old were you when you actually picked up a guitar? And what made And was it really Back to the Future? You're like, I want to be Marty McFly.

44:31 Yeah, I saw Back to the Future and whatever that thing was, which was that moment of like

44:36 comeuppance, you know, like that always meant something to me. And then I would like go to tag sales. called them tag sales in the Northeast or garage sales. And um I'd buy, you know, a guitar, I had my mom buy me a guitar for like $2. And like the first four guitars never had all six strings on them. And but then I'll never forget the day I had a guitar with all six strings cuz that was all of the strings. And then then I could really go off and running. And I just saw the I saw the geometry of the thing and I went, "Got it." And it wasn't that I knew how to play the guitar, but I knew how I was going to.

45:14 Yeah. And I just so quickly went and took things like rocks from the don't know it pile and put it into the know it pile. But it wasn't because I worked harder. I just looked at that thing and I went, I got it.

45:25 Did you Did you self teach? Did you just like start making noises? I was lucky. If you're if you're ever anyone out there, if you're going to give your kid a guitar, don't give them lessons for like a couple weeks.

45:36 Yeah. just go looking, go looking around, play around, just see because I still see the guitar neck the way I did when I first looked at it. And and then I started taking lessons. And then the guitar instructor, they used to cut it in half, 30 minutes, it' be 15 and 15. The first 15 minutes would be learning from the book and the second 15 minutes was like, "Bring in a song." And the and the guitar teacher will show you that song. And before long, it was just all bring in a song. And it was all show me everything and I could just I'd go home and I'd come back and I'd do it and I go give me more. Give me more.

46:10 And you just loved it and I loved it. And then I know you're trying to get me to taper down with the story and I'm almost there.

46:15 No, no, no, no. I'm just I'm I'm got to get to a commercial past. Sean, were you like that with the piano? Honestly,

46:23 I I went through the phase. I started I started at 5 years old. Literally came home from kindergarten. My mom was like, "Do you want to take piano lessons?" I literally said, "Uh, I'm not doing anything else." Why not? And she lived across the street and I started taking piano lessons. And then as I got older, all the adults in my life kept saying, "Gosh, you know, you're taking piano lessons. I wish I would have stayed with that. I wish or violin lessons or whatever lessons they took over and over again. All the adults would say, I wish I stuck with it." And so I turned that that messaging, I turned all those regrets into motivation. And so I was like, there must be something to that.

47:02 If I wonder if I just stick with it, like everybody's saying they wish they did, it might pay off and I might get respect for it because they gave up on it. So I don't know why.

47:13 Yeah. Having is connecting with an instrument is like the it's like flying. Every time I've tried to teach myself how to play guitar, I can't I can't get past how much it hurts my fingers. I know. So I So I I stop every time.

47:30 It hurts. Yet you'll watch Yet you'll watch a series for nine episodes cuz someone says it gets good on the 10th.

47:37 Like the things we'll stick with and the things we won't. I know. But also, you have to get a guitar that's set up right.

47:43 Sometimes people's first guitars have been in atticss and stuff. Do they make soft strings?

47:48 They make soft strings. My 14 My 14-year-old's here. He's up there and he and he started playing bass a couple years ago. Now he taught himself to play guitar and he's making music in his room. You knew that. I told you that. Able, where you at, Abe? He's up there somewhere.

48:00 Um, uh, bass strings, that's easier on the fingers. Those are bigger strings. It's like a It's like a gateway drug to guitars in a way, right? Bass.

48:08 Yeah. I mean, it sometimes it's whatever the band is. Sorry, buddy. I don't mean that.

48:10 But it's all about whether the guitar is set up right. Oh, you're going to pay for that later. It's only four strings, too, right?

48:16 Yes. When did you have start having panic attacks? Oh my god, boy. Because because I have I had them.

48:25 Worst host in the history. Because I had them 20 seconds ago. Yeah, because I had them too. And then I get Aphib, which is cardiac arhythmia, which you have.

48:37 I have as well. And how do you know when you're in it or No. Okay. Is there a doctor in the house just in case?

48:42 I have so much. They both seem like they're ready to pop. Yeah, because I had to go to the emergency room a lot to get cardioverted. Is that what you had to do? I didn't have to do cardio version. Uh so let's just get super esoteric here. When I was 17, I uh had AIB, a paracismal loan uh AIB. Sure. Sure.

49:00 And um and I got out of it with a digitalis. It's an anti-riythmic. Got out of there.

49:05 I tried that. Doesn't work. Got out of there for me. And um it's it's not what's going on.

49:09 It's not fatal for most people. There's a slight risk of stroke. That's right. But it's just a nuisance,

49:14 right? And it keeps me honest because I'm on a daily I'm on fleckinide 50 million.

49:20 You talk to the TV at home. This is you have I wave goodbye to the ladies in the view. I'm like goodbye.

49:28 Yeah. As they say goodbye. Um wait a minute. Um me too. I tried fleinide but then I I just take it as needed.

49:35 Yeah. Okay. I take it because I have lots of PACs or premature atrial complexes and uh hundreds a day if I'm not on fleconite. And sometimes I'll take it withol which is a beta blocker. Don't take 50 millig of methylol.

49:46 Say metropol. Yeah. Yeah. This reminds me of a TV show idea I have. And it's about a doctor who's a vampire, but he never went to medical school. He just lived so long that everything under the sun happened to him. So, so he just knows everything cuz he's lived like 800 years.

50:07 Yeah. And he's always trying to break in to drink the blood. I mean, we have that. We have the blood thing. We had he's always sneaking around the different floors. And I really like I really think I hit it out of the park with the name just

50:18 Dr. Vampire MD and like just come out with it. And I think if you're driving down Sunset to go back to wherever you guys are, you know, on the west side and you see a lit up sign over the Saddle Ranch and says Dr. Vampire MD, that you'd be like, I would check that out.

50:35 Absolutely. I would totally check that. Will you write the theme song? Yes. Wait, why don't you have hair on your arms? Simply the worst.

50:48 Simply worse than all terrible. Um Sean and I have both lost the hair on our on our shins from socks.

50:58 I not a natural. I used to make fun of Jeffrey Tambbor for that, but he was like, "Oh, you wait. You'll get old enough. You'll lose it."

51:04 So you're saying you lose hair on the legs? Yeah. From socks. Like on the inside I got hair outside like a like a biker.

51:10 Yeah. I I'm not a very uh I I don't I can't grow a beard. I'm not very same hairy and

51:15 alabaster all the way. Yeah. Yeah. We're very We're You and I are smooth. Yeah.

51:19 We're smooth. We're smooth jazz. Yeah. Yeah. Whose body was a Wonderland? Oh, I had that.

51:29 I can tell I can tell you and I like I think I've told people this much. It was your first girlfriend.

51:34 Yeah, it was my first girlfriend. Oh my god, he's mocking my answer. The worst hosting ever answer I've never had anybody mock an answer.

51:45 I would have sweetened it up. Put something in you hadn't heard. No. Okay. Sorry. Go ahead.

51:50 My first girlfriend. Get to it. Mayor, get to this question. Total setup because you asked me the question. Actually, what you're doing is making fun of him for asking.

52:00 That's right. That's right. That's right. But I did have on here, you have a highprofile dating history. Do we talk about it or not talk about it?

52:06 Here. Here. Here here's here's why I don't and and that had to do with it. I would talk about me if it related to me.

52:16 Sure. But I am older now. It's been a very long time since I mean I have my own situation from that. I stay inside the house. Aren't I a good boy, America? I'm not dating anybody. Aren't I good?

52:28 Are you Are you sing you single right now? I'm a single person. I'm a catch. Would you would you

52:33 would you would you like do you do you have do you have dreams of being a husband, a father? Yeah, absolutely.

52:41 It's not easy. It's not easy for John Mayer to date in all seriousness. Like what are you going to do? Like it's it's tough

52:48 to meet people. No, but I'll tell you, it's a very good uh it's a very good filtration system of selecting who's right. It's so if if if it's not easy, then that means when the right person comes along, well then that's easy because of how not easy it is until you meet the right person.

53:05 But let me ask you about what's right and what's wrong for a girlfriend versus a wife versus somebody that you might have a child with. Are you looking for something different now than you were say 10 years ago?

53:15 Because they're one and the same. There's I would not be I would not date someone if it didn't have

53:19 the upward mobility of becoming a married, right? So, don't marry a girlfriend. Perhaps said said differently.

53:25 But I don't. Wouldn't you always marry your girlfriend? Well, I do. I think I think there's a difference.

53:31 Explain it. Well, I think you know what they say, never marry your girlfriend. Well, but kind of feels like

53:41 they never said it. This is going to be good. Hi, Amanda. You know what they say?

53:50 They say be friends with your best friend. John, let him keep digging, please. Babe, should I put the shovel down?

53:57 Um, oh, no. I do think that you guys come in separate cars. No. Damn it. Um, but you know, you you might make a choice to date somebody uh that you think, ah, well, this this would be a fun girlfriend that it doesn't really doesn't really have legs to go a distance, but

54:16 All my girlfriends have had legs. It's something I mean, I I Good for you. Good for you, dude.

54:22 Yeah, so far I don't You got to have standards, you know. It just happens to be. I'm not looking on.

54:29 But Jay, keep going, though. Laugh it up, Jiggles. Um, you're you're on a are you on a dating site right now?

54:36 I'm not. Every girlfriend would be a potential wife at this point. I am 47, which

54:42 Oh, you're young. So, at this point, same. Do you think you're older than 47? Do you still think 47 is young? Is there something about 47

54:50 compared to 63? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It is young. Yeah. So, young it's so however difficult it is is how easy it will be to identify someone who's right. I think that's how I look at it.

55:03 Well, yeah. With age comes, you know, the ability to reflect on your past and not repeat the same mistakes. So, when you enter a new relationship, you are hopefully wiser and all of those things.

55:13 Can I tell you something? Then we could be really honest between us. Please just say it's all a [ __ ] crap. very wellbehaved.

55:21 I believe that by being well behaved. Like I really care. I'm I've developed really the best parts of me. I've I'm very well behaved.

55:32 I treat people really well. I'm honest. I'm sincere. I'm not sarcastic. And I don't know that people know this about me. And so I think that when people come into a dating situation with me, they think I'm going to be snappy and quick and sarcastic, but I'm not. Like I'm really Well, well, listen,

55:51 you guys are really giving yes and a run for it money out here. Just uh but but but I'm very well behaved. And the thing is like you have to be well behaved.

56:04 Was it always that way? No. Okay. Cuz you're a rock star. And if I'm a girl thinking about dating you, I think, well, this could be a challenge.

56:12 Yeah. I mean, I see hell hath no fury or or like maybe not like nothing is worse than someone who believes they're doing right and they're not. Like that's most [ __ ] in dating are such [ __ ] because if they would pass a lie detector test that they they mean well. good at being [ __ ]

56:35 but you can mean well and be terribly misbehaved and that's the kind of trap you get. This is Call Her Daddy, right?

56:42 Yeah. Yeah. This is where we are. So, I am very well behaved and this is I've never articulated this before, so forgive me if it sounds strict. I expect good like great behavior turns me on. I fixed like high wattage and I'm not saying anything about just general high wattage Hollywood zing it at you kind of that was interesting when I was young and now like [ __ ] being well behaved is the hottest in the world like like like good sleep hygiene table manners.

57:20 Um if if you you know what I would say it is responding to insecurity in a sincere way.

57:26 Yeah. Amen. Oh that's good. But I do it well. The ability the buil the ability to be vulnerable too is a big thing and that's what you get when you get older because you don't give a [ __ ] You're like, "Hey, this is who I am."

57:36 So what ended up happen right and but but I think that younger people need to get a head start on being more vulnerable. Being sarcastically invulnerable and apathetic is a really good healing mechanism to get over the past breakup. It is a great way to get over somebody is to go out with your girls and take a couple pictures for your dating site where you're like licking a knife, you know, whatever. I get it. I get that. But but you can't carry that into your next you have there's a I fear that there's a generation of people, men and women, who have decided to come into relationships in a very inflexible, sarcastic.

58:18 Vulnerability is the [ __ ] Leave yourself so vulnerable that you could die if someone said the wrong thing to you

58:28 and just die a thousand times and drive home and do all those farts in the car.

58:34 And get home and go, "Well, we tried." I I know that's the route to a quicker, better thing. Just be vulnerable.

58:42 Um, I want to get to your career because I have tremend I do. I want to get back to my career, too.

58:48 Yeah. I did have something about the sleep that you take magnesium baths. I don't even know what that is.

58:54 Where did you get I It's magnesium bath. Are you late for something? Are you in a rush?

59:00 No, I don't want to I don't want to overstay our welcome with our chat GPT. And you would say, "Chat GPT, are you sure about the magnesium bath thing with John?" And it would say, "You're right. I can't find exactly where I found it as a magnesium bath."

59:14 I tried looking. I love what Chad GP is like, "Fuck, you got me." Yeah. All right, we don't have to talk about No. So, but I do have um speaking about being vulnerable, if I can be vulnerable with you right now, that I do have um from one musician to another tremendous respect for you. I

59:33 I do I just think I I know so many of your songs. Um the first one, you know, the first one think most people uh knew you from is um I want to run through the halls of my high school. I want to scream at the top of my lungs.

59:49 Yeah, I love that song. I love that song. Anyway, um and then but go back to you released right?

59:54 Isn't it funny that like singers who also just talk but they you know the whole time they're talking they could be singing?

1:00:02 Yeah. I I always when I was younger I would watch people be like that guy's talking but he's also singing. And I feel like sometimes I want to show people it's like this is me talking. This is me talking. This is me talking. I'm kind of moving into singing now. I'm kind of moving into singing now. I wanna run through the house and now come back. But now, but now I'm coming back into talking. But now I'm talking again. Now I'm talking again. But at any moment I wanted to. I could go. What's to bring me down? And but I can talk again.

1:00:29 But I can talk again. But here's the thing. We're going to Yeah. I'm going to ask you if I'm going to ask you to sing at the end of the show here and then you're going to feel really uncomfortable. Wait, are you in a are you in a qu because I want to ask you about your your your musician musicianship. Uh so when you joined when you joined uh

1:00:47 dead company dead company. Yeah. I'll make sure you didn't say Grateful Dead cuz I feel bad.

1:00:51 So uh I've I I'm not a dead head, but I've loved the Grateful Dead for many years. I've I've only gone to like I went to like 10 shows, but I'm not dead. Uh, but I I watched you uh in an interview talking about learning the songs and how quickly you learned all those songs. It is bananas. Can you tell us a little bit about that process if you guys don't know?

1:01:13 Yeah. So, I was falling in love with the music of Grateful Dead. Like falling in love. If I hadn't joined the band or met Bob Weir and Mickey Hart and and Bill Croitzman, I would have just fallen into that anyway. And it's actually funny, the way I met them was through a mutual friend, Don Wes, producer extraordininaire, Don Wes, who said, "Come up and I know how much you love Grateful Dead right now. Come up and meet the guys." And I was just telling them how much their music meant to me. And they were like, "What are you doing March 7th?" And so I was like, "Wherever you need me?" Cuz they were looking at putting a band together. So it was really fascinating because as I was falling in love with the music, I would just learn how to play it on the guitar.

1:01:51 And I like I made a binder and the binder had bunch of you know tablete or sheet you know whatever the manuscript paper was and I would just write the song down and I would just do a song a day but I was in love with this song a day so I would just I took like six months off and learned how to play those songs.

1:02:08 But I mean it's how many songs is it? I mean it's it's I mean I think we played like 150 songs.

1:02:12 It's [ __ ] incredible. And he learned them you learned them all like in a short amount of time.

1:02:16 But you do this with lines will Yeah. It's a little bit different, man. How so? I couldn't do it. I couldn't look at it.

1:02:23 I say that, too. I say with lines, it's like singing because if you do a play or you have to do the same lines over and over again, you have to do the same lines over and over again. You have to do the same lines over. Yeah. It's like a song.

1:02:35 The geometry is already there. It's not like I have to make a new map for every song. And I'm already like visualizing where the music goes anyway. So it's it kind of it's easier than you might think to just place the think of it like a corkboard with like index cards or something. You go okay those are there or like dancers who can have like a twominute thing and someone can go take out that step in bar 12 and they can just it's like it's it's an innate language and if I had to learn how to do it and I it wasn't in me I wouldn't be able to do it. You are you one of those musicians that did you ever learn how to read music or

1:03:10 No, but I could read a chord chart but I can't read music. That's amazing. Yeah. But if I had I don't know that I would have even used that skill that much in pop music.

1:03:20 Um you know you've written like so many songs there. I by the way I love um what is it called? All we ever do is say goodbye.

1:03:28 I love that song so much. Was that which album was that on? That's on um that's on Battle Studies. And it's funny because as a writer, you can put a song out and then kind of get down about it. Oh, I think it's kind of this and then years later you listen back to it as someone who wouldn't or couldn't write that song today. And so you hear it for the first time and I I heard it for the first time not long ago after years of not listening to it. And I was like, "No, this is very nice."

1:03:56 But when you when you when you listen back to it, do you remember where you were? And I don't mean necessarily physically, but where you were, what it meant to you in the moment. You're like, "Oh," like when you hear a lyric or you hear a certain note that you hit and you go like, "Oh, yeah. I remember why I did that."

1:04:11 All of it. There's an emotional connection to it. All of it. It's very deep as I get older. And

1:04:18 it really is. And I'll tell you why. Like I don't know how to deal with it sometimes because I'll listen back to things and be so, and this is not arrogance because I'm not the same person. can't do that anymore. Like you're not the same person you were when you wrote letters to boyfriends or when you wrote in your diary. So I can look at it preserved in amber as this thing and I it's very deep. It's very profound because I appreciate it. I can't believe that I did that but I'm not that anymore.

1:04:51 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It doesn't belong to me even though everyone would say it does. as I go. But but those cells that made that thought and the person I was when I was that vulnerable or I was in that particular way and I didn't understand the world and

1:05:06 and I I want to be able to say, "Hey, that's my song." But I listen back to it and there's a sadness to not having it. It's hard. It's really hard to explain.

1:05:14 But then John, they have a relationship with the song when you see when they enjoy it or they say, "Hey, I really love that song. It really spoke to me. I was going through, you know, I was going through a breakup or somebody in my family died or whatever and they have a different emotional

1:05:27 response to it. How does that hit you? That's great. And whatever it is to someone else is great. And I'm at that age now where people have lost people they used to go to shows with or people they used to listen to the music with. And it makes you more it's such a deeper connection for people. It makes up for the times people go like, "Uh, you were my high school crush. Does this happen to you? You guys the idea?" Well, yeah. Yeah. me and you go, "Uh, oh, oh, this is the one. This is the one. My 14-year-old self is freaking out right now."

1:05:55 Yeah. Right. Right. And I go, "So, you're not." Yeah. And the version that did is no longer here, and you're here representing a former ver, but we're all in I'm

1:06:09 Do you feel like you're at like you're in a better place now than you were back then to write songs and music? Like, do you think you're better now? I I I bet you are. Great question.

1:06:19 Thank you. I better That's beautiful. Thank you. That's beautiful. Thank you. Um this is actually it's Yeah. Uh I could help anyone with their song. I could help anyone make their song better because of the just pure experience of trying to write every song or every type of song that's ever existed,

1:06:47 right? Um, it gets harder to write as you get older, but you're better when you do. And the reason it's harder to write is because you begin to answer the questions that you've had your whole life. And you should you shouldn't live in a constant state of like raw nerves, you know? And so when I was younger, everything hurt

1:07:07 and and I could write and I wanted to know why does this hurt? I got to get this out. And as you get older, you have wisdom and you have you understand why and you help other people who don't understand why why something's happening. And you can tell them what's coming up the road. So music comes from wanting to understand what's going on. And the more you understand what's going on, the less there is to write. But when you catch one, the more experienced you are at like putting spin on the ball, baby.

1:07:34 Have you ever written a song though that's been like really emotional and then you've had somebody important in your life and they hear and they're like, "Hey, [ __ ] Are we good?"

1:07:41 Like, is that about me? Is that about me? Like, what the hell? I thought everything was cool. We went on vacation last week and I was listening to the radio today.

1:07:51 Yeah, there's there's there's it happened to me one time. Really? It did. And were they right? Was it about them?

1:07:55 The good questions will get the right answers cuz I can't I Yeah, I I had a song called Perfectly Lonely. And at the end of the bridge, it was like something about have to thank the love so that went wrong to lead me to a love so strong. And she said, "Am I the love that went wrong? Am I the love that went wrong?"

1:08:14 Wow. Is and I had to be like, "No, you're you're not the it's just a song." That was the only time I think anyone ever.

1:08:21 But for the most part, I'm actually very Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's what I thought. And though it really was it really was the love that went wrong.

1:08:29 For the most part, my my songs aren't bitter. I don't write songs that are like how dare you songs. What's that?

1:08:36 What did you say? Oh, Heartbreak Warfare. Yeah. Yeah. Except that one track inside my chest to keep me No computers. Isn't this amazing?

1:08:48 Yeah. It's so good. I mean, but I mean, I tell you, I'm freaking out that you're singing in front of me right now. It's really cool.

1:08:56 Well, speaking of which, what's that goddamn piano doing? No, I I had one last question before I

1:09:02 If you want me to play something, I'll play some. I know I said I would. I do. I do.

1:09:05 Obviously. Um, but before before that, before you get let's last question. Let's say you could form a super group of musicians that are alive. Who's in it? And what's the name of it?

1:09:14 Alive. Okay. Um, great answer. That is good. I mean I So to me my hero like like real Okay. There's people you say they're your hero, but there's people that you just lose it around. And to me Eddie Veter to me that's it. That's it. Love him. Yeah.

1:09:36 Like you got to understand like you can play any people play so many different things on a guitar there or I should say there's only so many things you could play on a guitar. His particular way of dropping in

1:09:48 Yeah. Yeah. So, I would just want to It's a selfish thing. I'd want to be next to him making music.

1:09:54 Yeah. And luckily, I'd put people in the band I' probably already played with. I put Steve Jordan on the drums, put Pino on the bass.

1:09:59 Yeah. I love that. You know, I when cuz I obviously I knew you were coming on because you're my guest today, but I went bonkers with nerves cuz I was practicing a couple of your songs cuz I wanted to play with you, but I can't because we didn't rehearse. No, no, no. I can't. So,

1:10:14 I have to cuz I didn't rehearse. No, no, I don't know the chords and all that, but but um I mean I need sheet music. I can't read fake books and chord search. So, but if you weren't going to play, I was going to bait you by playing something myself, but I'm glad you are so I don't have to. So, please would you indulge us and play something?

1:10:30 Um I just have to remember it. Yeah, it's very nice of you, John. Yeah, it's very nice of you.

1:10:35 Very nice of you. Um Oh my god, there's so many. Can I play anything I want? Anything? And I want to impress you. You're the You're You were the one who brought me in. You're the one who sent the email.

1:10:45 Well, I I I like You wrote all those great questions. That one. I love all All we ever do is say goodbye. I love all the I love the first one. I can't remember the name, but I know all the words. I want to run my halls in high school.

1:10:57 Oh, no such thing. Yeah. I mean, but you probably don't want to play that. I don't know.

1:11:01 I mean, it's there's Could you let him let him play what the hell he wants? Yeah. Play whatever you want. I want you to play what you want.

1:11:06 I'll tell you what. You call it out. I'll play a little bit of it. No. No. You play it. You You pick. You pick.

1:11:11 Uh, see, gravity would be nice, too. All of the Yeah. Play all of all of medley.

1:11:22 Medley. I know. I'm at the age of doing a medley. I'll do a medley if you want.

1:11:25 Yes. All right. Hold on. Let me just load it up in my head. Okay. All right. All right. Okay.

1:11:35 Yeah. So, it's not a silly little moment. It's not strong before the call. This is the deep and dying breath of this love that we've been working on and on. Can't seem to hold you like I want to. So I can feel you in my arms. Nobody's going to come and save you. We put too many false alarms. We go down and you can see it too. We're going down. And you know that we're my dear. Slow dancing in a burning ropes too. Good. Can I just keep going on this song? I was the one you always dreamed of. You were the one I tried to draw.

1:12:50 How dare you say it's nothing to me. Baby, you're the only light I ever saw. I'll make the most of all the sadness. You'll be a [ __ ] because you can. Oh, you try to hit me just to help me. So you leave me feeling dirty cuz you can't understand. We're going down. You could feel it too. Ah, we're going down. And you know that we're dear. slow dancing in a burning room. And now Sean, in other words, I guess what I was trying to say with this song was was all we ever do is say goodbye. Oh, all we ever do is say goodbye.

1:13:54 All we ever do is say goodbye. All we ever do is say goodbye. All we ever do is say goodbye. All we ever do is say goodbye. All we ever do is say goodbye. All we ever do is say goodbye. Welcome to the real world. She said to me condescendingly. Take a seat. Take your life and plot it out in black and white. Well, I never live the dream of the prom kings and the drama queens. I'd like to think the best of me is still hiding out my seat. They love to tell you inside the lines with something better on the other side. You want everybody?

1:15:30 Yeah. I want to run through the halls of my high school. I want to scream at the top of my kids. I just found out there's no such thing as the real world, just a lie. You got to rise above. I just can't wait till my senior reunion. I'm going to pass down the double doors. And when I stand on these tables before you, you will know what all the sil

1:16:17 thank you so much. What a bless. What a blast. Awesome. Great. Um, well, Sean, great job, Sean. I gotta say, great job, Sean. Great job, Jason.

1:16:31 I mean, I think I mean, believe him. Where is he? Where is he? He's up there. He's in the back of the theater.

1:16:42 Um, I think uh Scotty might be in trouble. Huh? I mean, that uh that uh what that I did this photo.

1:16:48 Well, no. I mean, I did You guys had a real connection. Yeah, I know. I love that guy. He's so Isn't he amazing?

1:16:55 Mayor, you guys, what a talent. And I saw I saw a bunch of you guys mouthing the lyrics, too, like that. Like, you didn't know he was coming out here. You're big John Mayer fan. I love that.

1:17:06 I like what he said about vulnerability. I think more men should be more vulnerable in the world. Agree.

1:17:12 Um, we talk about that a lot. And I think he's a brainiac and a sweetheart and a good person. And I hope he finds love because he deserves it. That's right.

1:17:21 And um there's a bucket out there with phone numbers for any single people out there.

1:17:25 And um but I love that song. One of my favorite songs. I know. It's great. Sounded very good.

1:17:30 Do you remember the name of it? All we ever do is say goodbye. Bye. Very good. Thank you so much. Thank you.

1:17:43 Thank you. Thank you. Smart glass smartless is 100% organic and artisally handcrafted by Rob Armjarf, Bennett Barbco, and Michael Grant Terry. Smart less.

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What is discussed in "John Mayer LIVE | SmartLess"?

In order: 0:00 Ashley, SmartLess, Avalon Theater, Bob Bennett; 10:00 Bucket List, The Bucket List, Spotify, Bring on the Night; 20:00 Mobile, SmartLess, SmartLess Mobile, Bradley Cooper; 30:00 Ashley, Four Others, Mobile, Bob Saget; 40:00 Atlanta, Berkeley College of Music, Mobile, Avalon Theater; 50:00 Dr. Vampire MD, Sleep Hygiene, Vulnerability; 1:00:00 Grateful Dead, All We Ever Do Is Say Goodbye, Battle Studies, Bob Weir; 1:10:00 All We Ever Do Is Say Goodbye, No Such Thing, Bob Bennett, Gravity.

What is mentioned in this SmartLess episode?

79 people, works and ideas are mentioned, including SmartLess, Ashley, Mobile, All We Ever Do Is Say Goodbye, Four Others, Bucket List. Each one on this page links to its own page with every episode that mentions it.

How long is "John Mayer LIVE | SmartLess"?

The episode runs 1 h 18 min; the transcript is about 15,689 words in 381 timestamped sections.

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